cbird65 to cbird to bird ... either way here's the back story

[cbird65]

24 Mar 2012, 14:52
My mind always races while I doing yard work - sometimes it's just random stuff that is meaningless but today I came away with a question for myself and for you quitters reading this and believe it's applicable in Day1 or Day gazillion



Who's quit are you impacting today??

[cbird65]

22 Mar 2012, 15:55
Day 83 and I feel a rant coming -

Over the last week or two I have seen a number of caves. "I had a couple too many during my first week or two of my quit. I slipped up, I was stressed out, I saw a buddy and he had a dip in and without thinking I asked him for one, blah blah blah blah!!!-

First - what are doing drinking anyway- get serious or get out- Are you setting a pattern of behavior by caving every time adversity faces you? “Buddy” really – NO FRIEND of mine would even consider offering me a dip of Copenstanken !

Get real guys – go back to “Hell week” and relive that experience in your head . If that’s not enough, how about all the other physical ailments Ms. Niccy has thrown at us over the last 80 + days.

Still not convinced, revisit that discussion in your head and heart about quitting in the first place - If you haven’t had that discussion yet and are still quit, I employ you to do so otherwise there is no conviction in your decision and will be blown like a reed in the wind. It's time to man up and stay true to your word!

This roller coaster we're on changes all the time. Keeping one eye on the rear view mirror to keep grounded (learning from the past) and the other looking forward so you can navigate around the upcoming pot holes.

Coach Steve, here’s the soap box back ….
Last edited by CBird65 on 09 Apr 2012, 13:29, edited

[cbird65]

09 Mar 2012, 09:40
Day 70 - went on a mission to collect as many of my group's phone numbers this week- better than expected results but man oh man it took forever to manually input those into my phone-

If you are going to do a mass PM blast- I suggest you have your group call ur phone so all you have to do is personalize their number-

all of mine start KTC then their name or handle

[cbird65]

07 Mar 2012, 08:17
Day 68 and the plan of action is paying it forward-

Yes, I've posted to intro pages with the how to steps or tried to help the newbies navigate the dreaded posting process.

Yesterday I start a new mission with my group and am pleased with the response ~~~so far ~~ better than 50% have responded favorably but I am wanting more.

Now its time to get into the mix- I have a number of guys who I am/will be sending weekly if not daily PMs with nuggets of knowledge I've found on these pages but also to talk straight with them - sorry so sugar coating the plain truth that no matter how long we're quit we still -(say it together) ADDICTS- albeit recovering addicts

more later
Last edited by CBi

[cbird65]

At a loss for words


We lost one of our guys over the weekend.  Was he a random roll poster, you ask.  No, in fact he never missed a day.  That’s right for 60 days like clockwork he posted.  POOF- He was gone.  

Who is to blame-  well the guy with the smoking gun is the usual suspect -  haven’t heard his side of the story yet so I will reserve comment-

Lesson-  commit yourself early on and get/give numbers.  Along with that number swap you also give permission for the other to pound you if you don’t post or ever consider caving.

THIS IS NOT A GAME BOYS!  

If you do not want to make that commitment- re-think why you are here in the first place

[cbird65]

 03 Mar 2012, 13:17 #19
Are you living your quit proactively or is it reactively??

[cbird65]

[size=75]I saw this on an active page and will gladly tell you the author and give him his props if you ask. [/size]


 He slipped, fell and he got back up but I will use it regardless!

“Alright. . . I am in a pissed off mood and I feel it is time to say some shit to those of you who may not be committed to your quit.

I have wanted to lay some shit down, but felt it wasn't (yet) my place because I am a retread. Here it is. Some of you are "attempting", "trying", thinking about quitting, or whatever because your girl doesn't like it or because your gums got wrecked or whatever. But you don't really want to be quit. You aren't willing to do ANYTHING to be quit. You may not even know the difference yet.

I learned it the hard way. I thought I was ready. I thought I quit for good but screwed myself and all of January 2012 over by caving when I strayed   away because I thought I could do it on my own. I found out the hard way that I didn't want it bad enough.

Some of you have already caved. Some more will. Those of you who are serious will sit back and watch a recurring theme of "I thought I could do it on my own", "I quit posting roll and....", "I didn't have enough numbers", "It was late and I didn't want to wake anyone up", "I was stressed, tired, blah, blah, BLAH".

I know you all have heard this stuff a million times, but I don't care. Here it is again.

-Post roll every-day
-Keep your word
-Repeat
-Tell everyone around you that you are quit. Ask for their support.
-Involve your wife, your kids, family, anybody close to you in your quit.
-Demand that your "buddies" respect your decision. If they don't, they aren't you buddies.
-Tell dippers that you will dump their can on the floor if they let you get a hand on it.
-Get as many number as you can. I have 35 and I have used almost 20 of them. How many do you have?
Keep in touch with your quit brothers. Send them a text or call every few days just to keep an open line of communication.
-Give them your email address
-Make it IMPOSSIBLE for you to go a day without several people contacting you all day if you don't post roll.
-Have fake, gum, mints, atomic fire balls, orange peels, tea bags, ginger, seeds, whatever helps keep you quit handy at all times wherever you are.
-Be willing to do anything to get in contact with a quit brother to post roll. Call text, use a pay phone, hike to a spot with cell service, whatever.
-DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO STAY QUIT!”

[cbird65]

how about this one for the wall of weird-  head cold as a trigger?  what goes with the occasion head cold - of course the OTC meds that give you pin cushion head-  well it's trigger a crave

Crazy, I didn't get a blip on the crave radar while relaxing on vacation but sure enough I come home with a head cold and blamo-

Hooch and a post- + watch Pavetheway's De-Stress video link one more time and it's all good!

[cbird65]

Old temptation defeated ~ the beach vacation
I’ve been scuba diving since ’96 and wherever there is open water I’m in it and what used to follow a dive, yep a dip.  
This was the first down time I’ve had since my quit on New Year’s Eve.  Roughly ten days of hanging out on the beach, diving, fishing and drinking the occasional adult beverage was the agenda.  While I was packing, my wife asked why I was taking 10 cans of Hooch.  “Better to be on the safe side” was my reply.  I usually consumed a can a day while on vacations like this in the past.  Yes I posted roll call every morning as the sun was rising and am proud to say still 100% in posting since my quit.  This is a black and white topic for me with absolutely NO greay area.  DO or DONT-  Always POST.  Posting roll is no longer a chore; it’s becoming a way of life.  I am looking forward to posting my daily promise and then actively battling to protect my still new found freedom.  It is now becoming a badge of honor and a stronghold that I will not surrender.  Yes, I have my back up defense numbers and my emergency fake chew if needed but the biggest fight in this battle is in my mind.  Does the circumstance in front of me warrant putting a loaded gun to my head again?  (metaphorically speaking of course) The answer is always NO.  I won’t get overly theological but the biggest weapon was turning this addiction over to God.  My belief and my faith will be furiously defended and I truly believe it’s an adding weapon Ms Niccy must fight against as well.
I won’t bore you with all the details of the trip but three thing stands out -  on day one we were having lunch and I pulled my can of Hooch on the put it on the table.  I announced to all present that I was on day 48 and basically enlisted them to keep me true.  Day 4, we suffered the passing of a family member (selfishly I’m thankful that he’s passing did not return our immediate return) and finally I came home with 9 ½ cans of Hooch!  

One last note, yesterday morning in chuch our Executive Pastor stops me in the hall and says "Well..." waiting for "my day quit" !  I quickly responded 58, how cool is that ?!

Invincible, no, but I feel stronger in my quit for sure!

More later…

[cbird65]

Random thoughts on day 47

1. Since I started dipping at the age of 12 - all of my adult decisions have been made "under the influence" ---

2. that goes the same for my reaction to daily circumstances also-

3. the joys of re-defining one's self- adding to mental muscle groups to my workout progam  self-control and discipline

4. Why didn't I come up with a cool handle instead of a high school nickname?

...... to be continued

[cbird65]

What's strikes is absolutely awesome on day 45-  seeing guys who struggled posting at the beginning now helping others out-

give me fish vs teach me to fish


oh yeah!!

[cbird65]

It's been awhile since I updated this- Day 43 now and have been up since 2AM- insomnia seems to be normal these days so random thoughts are flowing like a river.
Still working out at 5AM and drinking a ton of water daily.  

Read, read, read... knowledge is key to defeating Ms Niccy on a daily basis.  

My half  to three quarter of a can a day habit of cope from 7AM-6PM, has now been replaced with one healthy pinch of Hooch Classic.

Posting roll call is second nature now - almost afraid not to post for fear it might start a downward spiral.

Get involved in your group. Thanks 30yrAddict, for the help in getting the tracker started- i want to be like you when I grow up lol.  Find a way to help, encourage or plant a boot in someone's backside (lovingly if needed). You will be amazed while helping someone else out, your quit gets stronger and you dodge or Ms. Nicky DeBitch one more time.

Absorb the brunt of someone's rage without blowing up, even if it wasn't provoked.

Develop a “what-if plan”.   You need numbers of brothers/sisters that will get you through a funk/crave.

Expand your accountability group to other outside of your HOF group and outside of this sight. I've  broadcast to all my friends, family and Adult Bible Fellowship at church that I quit - unbelievable support on a regular basis

When someone asks me how I am doing, I respond with "Day 43" or whatever day quit I am. I get funny looks but most of the time, the person asks me what I am talking about and provides a perfect segue to tell them about my quit.

[cbird65]

Forgive me for not introducing myself earlier- not much into blogging for chat and to be honest have been a little overwhelmed the last 5 days-
Chip- aka CBird65 - from DFW-  dipped cope for 35 years- until 12/31/2011

What was my motivation for my decision- how about, I had just had enough-  my wife of 11 years silently prayed that I would quit as did my mom and sisters-  

this decision isn't for them- it's 100% about me and getting the bitch off my back- tired of shelling out money for something that will kill me, I wasn't hiding it for anyone so there wasn't a guilt issue- just plain medical and financial-  roughly figure I gave those bastards $20000.00 over the last 35 years and enough is enough!

currently on day 5 posting roll and am sub-ing cope with Smokey Mountain-  Hootch is in the mail and my goal is to limit those fake dips to radom times throught the day-  I've heard 72 hrs rids the body of nic but it's the habit of "dipping " that will be one of my hurdles-

To all those April HoFs-  keep the fight- it's only a 2 1/2" can right!?!