Holy shit.
Colonel, I dont hold you in such a low regard, I get pissed off when someone refers to me as a lost cause, idiot, and tells me "You better not say this or that when I'm around"
Yeah..Right. Whatever Chief.
What I have learned...
Stay very vigilant. I was relaxed, tired and getting gas for the morning haul to take the kids to school. Without even thinking I ordered up a tin. I threw it away. I got lucky.
Funny thing is, I bought it out of habit. The same way I reach for a spitter while chewing gum. I realized what I had done and THEN my addiction really started kicking in.
Nicotine started the tricks. The usual shit that we all know about. "Just one dip, your good. You dipped for years and quit, you can do one and quit again. Its all good. Just a small one, for like two minutes tops. After that its done. Don't you want to just taste it one more time? Cmon! For old times sake! You wont get cancer from one more! Just smell it. Come on, I mean, doesnt it just feel good to pack that tin? Just one little dip. Remember when you were younger, playin ball with a fat lip in? Ahh, good times. Just one, just for tonight. Its after midnight, you wont be breaking your roll post...
Shit you dont even have to tell anyone. It'll be our little secret"
Man, it was an epic battle. I mustered up the strength to pitch it. My old lady saw the tin and snuck off with it for a while. I noticed this and didnt say anything. She came back in from smoking and said, "You gonna tell them about this?" I said, "Eh, maybe. It wasn't really intentional and I decided Im not going to dip." She laughed at me. Thats when I realized I am in WAY over my head here. How I survived was a point of luck and divine intervention.
The point is this, fellow quit brothers and sisters...
Take those extra precautions. Yes, the ones that seem ridiculous. Stay away from it at all costs. The people at the store don't know your quit. They aren't going to stop you so it is up to YOU to stay away from tobacco.
Be vigilant. Think of your nicotine addiction not as a dependency to a drug, but more like a sneaky thief of freedom and good health that has an agenda against you. Think of it as an entity, a powerful entity that knows EVERYTHING about you, because it is you. It is your Dr. Jeckyll. Your own mind has an alternate personality that will step right into your shoes and try to take control. This isn't a simple chemical dependency, I swear it is another evil person inside yourself and its only purpose is to get you back on the nicotine.
You created this monster when you started nicotine, and it doesn't want to go away.
The ONLY way to keep it in check is to rely on the connections you have made in your journey to freedom.
Be careful out there quitters. Nicotine has a powerful weapon, and its you.
Hows that Colonel?
This is my keepsake for when I almost caved at day 6.
