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Author Topic: Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;  (Read 2176 times)

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Offline magnum9

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Re: Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;
« Reply #7 on: September 28, 2011, 02:04:00 PM »
Quote from: Notdeadyet
Quote from: kmm125
I am the fiancee of a January 2012 quitter.
I am so proud of him, and everyone on this site.
I feel as though I need this site almost as much as him.
I want to encourage him, and never nag him.
I want to encourage all of you.
I dont miss the smell and he's only been 20 hours quit.
I won't miss the fear associated with dipping.
I want him to feel normal, but I know it will take time.
I want him to embrace the fog so he will remember what it feels like.
I want him to have control over his life.
I want to live a long full life with him.
I cant wait to be the fiancee of a January 2012 Hall of Famer!!

kmm125-2 He said the fog has started, it will be a long day today as it will be his first full day!  Thank you to all of you for encouraging and loving him :)
Your role is pretty simple:

1) Tell him you are proud of him
2) Encourage him that he can do this no matter how tough it gets
3) Distract him with lots of sex
:D
In my case number 3 was instrumental in my quit. In fact 1 and 2 drove me nuts. I didn't even want to see my wife most times... Except for while number 3 was active. :P
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Offline dchogs

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Re: Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;
« Reply #6 on: September 28, 2011, 01:09:00 PM »
nice to have you here.

here's my advice:

let this be his quit. no pressure, no nagging, no constant questions.

i just posted on another intro that you have to decide that dipping just isn't something you do anymore. the new you ain't interested in the can.

you also have to act like the new him is set in stone. constant worrying, questions, comments, etc can just remind him that this new him is NEW. so you will have to 100% trust him as a man of his word that he's not dipping.

now, you're also dealing with an addict; a junkie. no one in their right mind is going to 100% trust an addict right away. so you trust, but you quietly verify. watch him, log on to KTC to see if he's posted roll like a good boy, kiss him a lot. women are good at being sneaky... it shouldn't be a problem. :)


go out of your way to help him if he asks, but let him own this. YOU can't be the reason he quits. it has to come from within. it the reason is external, the quit will fail because that external reason will not always be there to remind him why he's fighting.

again, thanks for being here. you're already showing great support.
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Quit- 5/16/2011. One day at a time.
HoF- 8/23/2011; 2nd Floor- 12/1/2011; 3rd Floor- 3/10/2012; 4th Floor- 6/18/2012; 5th Floor- 9/27/2012; 6th Floor- 1/4/2013; 7th Floor- 4/14/2013; 8th Floor- 7/23/2013; 9th Floor- 10/31/2013; 10th Floor- 2/8/2014; 11th Floor- 5/19/2014; 12th Floor- 8/27/2014; 13th Floor- 12/5/14; 14th floor- 3/15/15; 15th floor- 6/23/15; 16th floor- 10/1/15; 17th floor- 1/9/16; 18th floor- 4/18/16; 19th floor- 7/26/16; 20th floor- 11/4/16; 21st floor- 2/12/17; 22nd Floor- 5/23/17; 23rd Floor- 8/31/17; 24th Floor- 12/9/17; 25th floor- 3/19/18; 26th floor- 6/27/18; 27th floor- 10/5/18; 28th floor- 1/13/19; 29th foor- 4/22/19; 30th floor- 7/31/19; 31st floor- 11/8/19; 32nd floor- 2/17/20; 33rd floor- 5/27/20; 34th floor- 9/4/20; 35th floor- 12/13/20; 36th floor- 3/23/21; 37th floor- 7/1/21; 38th floor- 10/9/21; 39th floor- 1/17/22; 40th floor- 4/27/22; 41st floor- 8/5/22; 42nd floor- 11/12/22; 43rd floor- 2/20/23; 44th floor- 6/1/23; 45th floor- 9/9/23; 46th floor- 12/18/23; 47th floor- 3/27/24.

"He which hath no stomach to this fight let him depart. But we in it shall be remembered. We few, we happy few, we band of brothers! For he today, that sheds his blood with me, shall always be my brother." (Wm. Shakespeare). For August '11.

Who dares, wins.

Stay quit... it is life or death and that is the undeniable truth.

"To be driven by our appetites alone is slavery, while to obey a law that we have imposed on ourselves is freedom." Rosseau

Offline Notdeadyet

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Re: Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;
« Reply #5 on: September 28, 2011, 12:03:00 PM »
Quote from: kmm125
I am the fiancee of a January 2012 quitter.
I am so proud of him, and everyone on this site.
I feel as though I need this site almost as much as him.
I want to encourage him, and never nag him.
I want to encourage all of you.
I dont miss the smell and he's only been 20 hours quit.
I won't miss the fear associated with dipping.
I want him to feel normal, but I know it will take time.
I want him to embrace the fog so he will remember what it feels like.
I want him to have control over his life.
I want to live a long full life with him.
I cant wait to be the fiancee of a January 2012 Hall of Famer!!

kmm125-2 He said the fog has started, it will be a long day today as it will be his first full day! Thank you to all of you for encouraging and loving him :)
Your role is pretty simple:

1) Tell him you are proud of him
2) Encourage him that he can do this no matter how tough it gets
3) Distract him with lots of sex
:D
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Offline LLCope

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Re: Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;
« Reply #4 on: September 28, 2011, 09:56:00 AM »
kmm,

I am on day 154 today. Outside of KTC (and this awesome support), my wife has been my #1 support. During the first part of my quit, when it was the roughest, my wife and I would sit and talk and have what we called a "POW WOW", she would remind me of what I have accomplished, and would bring up all the positives in my life and the negatives of when I was using dip. These POW WOW's would help a lot. Remind him of his BLESSINGS and help him to see the HOPE beyond the pain.

I am on day 154 and it is 95% better and continues to get better.


LL
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"A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can do without" HD Thoreau

Offline klark

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Re: Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;
« Reply #3 on: September 28, 2011, 09:33:00 AM »
I would suggest you read this if you have not already. Tell him we are here to help.

http://www.killthecan.org/community/spouse.asp
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Offline syndrome

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Re: Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;
« Reply #2 on: September 28, 2011, 07:29:00 AM »
well just rememember when he gets all pissy you send him here sos he can bitch at us and not you.

and wach out cuz some guys round here may give him more lovin then you mite want him to get. lucky you cuz gregs gone.
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Offline kmm125

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Fiancee of a January 2012 Quitter;
« on: September 28, 2011, 07:20:00 AM »
I am the fiancee of a January 2012 quitter.
I am so proud of him, and everyone on this site.
I feel as though I need this site almost as much as him.
I want to encourage him, and never nag him.
I want to encourage all of you.
I dont miss the smell and he's only been 20 hours quit.
I won't miss the fear associated with dipping.
I want him to feel normal, but I know it will take time.
I want him to embrace the fog so he will remember what it feels like.
I want him to have control over his life.
I want to live a long full life with him.
I cant wait to be the fiancee of a January 2012 Hall of Famer!!

kmm125-2 He said the fog has started, it will be a long day today as it will be his first full day! Thank you to all of you for encouraging and loving him :)
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KTC professional cheerleader and encourager and fiancee of pokerleader :)

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