At the risk of getting pissed off again, I want to share this with you. The next time you are having a bad day with cravings and dealing with life without nicotine....always know that someone has it worse than you do. I don't post this for pity or poor, poor me comments. I post this because I want to show that people struggle with things far worse than our withdrawl from nicotine. Compared to what my wife goes through, our journey to stay quit is a breeze.
Written by my wife Amanda....You may not agree with the ideology or the religion, but I ask that you keep your comments to the contrary out of my intro thread. Thanks.....
It is by the grace of God that I have made it through the last 2 years. You see I am not a victim, but a survivor of life with illness. I have scars that I glance at and turn my head. It is a flaw and it will not go away. It reminds me of what I have survived this far on my journey. I didnÂ’t know that 2 years ago IÂ’d eat my “last meal” or I wouldÂ’ve made a better choice than WendyÂ’s.Â
IÂ’ve been to 7 different hospitals and seen many different doctors and many different specialties. I have been poked, stuck, and cut open. Try this medication and let us try this physical therapy, and now letÂ’s try this surgery. I have been told so many times in the last 2 years that I am beyond the realm of there expertise. I am now at the Cleveland Clinic where they think they can help me. I have Gastroparesis, also called delayed gastric emptying, is a medical condition consisting of a paresis (paralysis) of the stomach, resulting in food remaining in the stomach for a longer period of time than normal. I also have Colonic inertia is actually a medical term for the condition in which either nerves or muscles in the colon do not function properly.Â
On August 6th I had a surgery to get a gastric neuro-stimulator, or stomach pacemaker, helps control nausea and vomiting by electrically stimulating nerves in the stomach. For some patients, the relief is instant while others take up to a year to notice any difference and some may never get relief.Â
People with GP do not have that hope that tomorrow will be better right now. Each day varies and some are better than others, but inevitably the bad days will always come back. There are limited options to treat symptoms, but they don’t work well. Patients are basically told to “live with it.” In some cases, it can’t be lived with. While most people with GP get by on what is available, because there are no other options, quality of life is certainly gloomy. Many survive on less than 1,000 calories a day, severe weight loss, disability, tube feedings, IV nutrition, medication with nasty side effects, and a life full of invasive medical treatments and hospitalizations. GP is not just simple illnesses, which can be cured through diet changes, medication, or surgery. They do not mildly impact life. They have a profound influence on every daily activities, regardless of severity. There is no escape. Is this the kind of life a person wants to “just live with?” I’ve been diagnosed with other things along the way but, these are the majors! These conditions are so poorly understood. They are so hidden that people often don’t believe they are real or are not as serious as they actually are. Although difficult to understand, patients suffering from GP may look completely healthy. They may drive, work, shop, go to church, take care of a family, and look great on the outside. Their color may be nice, they may look strong and energetic, and they may appear to be feeling well. Yet, the turmoil churning within them is by no means normal. On top of the physical issues, because the conditions are so poorly understood, people with GP often have to live with the challenges of stereotyping by society. It is often believed that patients are exaggerating their conditions because they don’t “look sick.” Others believe those who suffer really just have an eating disorder and use a “mild” condition as an excuse for not eating well. People simply don’t understand that a couple sips of soup can send one’s gut into a frenzy and result in hours of nausea, abdominal pain, and vomiting. Sometimes this lasts even for days. Think back again to the day you had the flu. You probably did not want to lift your head off the bed or couch. You felt too weak to make it to the bathroom. Every time you sat up, you felt your head spin and the nausea increased even more. Finally, it was a battle of determination to force yourself up and walk to distance to the bathroom. While you were up, you tried to grab as many items as you needed so you didn’t have to get back up again for a long time. By the time you get back to bed, you were so weak and wiped out that all you wanted to do is sleep or watch TV. But you couldn’t get your mind off the nausea. It was so overwhelming that you curled up into a ball on your side and just waited for it to pass. You took flu medication in hopes of sleeping it off and had hope that tomorrow would be better.
OK OK OK you know where I am going! The Lord is MY STRENGTH and now youÂ’ve taken a journey of the last 2 years!
What I am saying after giving you a summary is that God is good and has been with me on the journey every single step of the way. What an amazing God!
My husband is amazing too! He is there in puke, surgery, test and doctor appointments. The strength that he has sustained is truly a gift of God. Love over whelms me! My backbone is the people around me that love me and pray with me. Watch therefore and pray always. Pray without ceasing. The prayers give me strength, hope, love, courage, fight and will!Â
God has brought us relationships. Healed relationships, and strengthened relationships on the journey. And, my friend that makes it all worth the while!
God’s grace is sufficient! Amazing Grace!
#IStrong
