A Little Late

[srans]

I just want to thank everyone for all the words of encouragement and stories in the last 24 hours.  I can't tell you how much it helps to be able to pop on and read about others struggles and difficulties, but I'm sure you already know that. 

The one thing that I have found interesting is how many of us were essentially living out the same story.  I honestly thought I was the only one who went to such great lengths to hide it form loved ones, and that I was super special for being able to hide it so well. 

Funny how that one little drug can control everything in your life to the point where you seem to value it over everything else. 

I look back now in my fog induced state, and I can't believe how stupid I was.  Glad to be quit with you all today, and thank you once again.

Great job matty. Yea,, I read through my intro not to long ago,,, It sounded like a old love letter. Stay quit brother,, you will like what's coming... Glad to be quit with you.

[mattyf118]

I just want to thank everyone for all the words of encouragement and stories in the last 24 hours. I can't tell you how much it helps to be able to pop on and read about others struggles and difficulties, but I'm sure you already know that.

The one thing that I have found interesting is how many of us were essentially living out the same story. I honestly thought I was the only one who went to such great lengths to hide it form loved ones, and that I was super special for being able to hide it so well.

Funny how that one little drug can control everything in your life to the point where you seem to value it over everything else.

I look back now in my fog induced state, and I can't believe how stupid I was. Glad to be quit with you all today, and thank you once again.

[Erussell]

I sent you a PM with my number. You have a lot of great advice below. I would like to add build as much accountability around your quit as possible. Post your word and keep it. It will get so much better soon. I will quit with you as hard as I possibly can minute by minute if that's what it takes Bro. Erussell 134.

[Diesel2112]

Very common and familiar story.

I lied to my wife's face for 15 years.

One day I got a sore on my lip and had a panic attack thinking it was the big C. I had never had one before, thought I was dieing so I took an ambulance ride to the hospital. Never told my wife, a doctor or even a nurse I chewed while I laid in my hospital bed.

Eventually they checked me out head to toe, said I was fine and sent me home.

First thing I did when I got home...lied to my wife and told her I was going to the gym. I drove around dipping like a fool, splashed a little water on my shirt and head to look like sweat and headed home.

When I got home I felt funny. Scared shitless is more like it and once again thought I was gonna die and went back to the hospital.

Nobody could figure out what the fuck was wrong with me.

FINALLY I came clean to my wife, doctors, and entire family. They were shocked, yet supportive when I told them I was going to quit.

Even though I felt a ton of weight lifted off my shoulders, quitting was really really really really really hard for me. I was a pussy and actually left the site for awhile because I was such a scared bitch.

I never caved though and after about a month I came back, thanks to a guy names Wedgie. 467 days later I'm still quit, but still an addict.

Point of all this...I've walked in your shoes, we all have, and although at times quitting will be very tough, if you REALLY want to quit you can and will. And we will help you along the way.

The road is very bumpy at first but only gets smoother with time.

You can do this!!!

If a pussy like me can do it, anybody can.

Need anything hit me up morning, noon, or night.

Quit on...

[Mike from AB]

Welcome Matthew, all the best to you as you start down this road!

[Minny]

I didn't want to admit the extent of my lying. But as soon as I realized what a turdbag I was, I developed a healthy anger towards tobacco and the selfish fuckhead I was. I threw my embarrassment, self-contempt and anger at tobacco on top of the pile of reasons I already had to quit. I realized how much of a better person/father/husband I could be. No more lying to my wife and kids about some bullshit "errand" I had to run at 10:00 at night. No more acting like an idiot wondering if I got rid of my spitter whenever she got near my car. Just no more carrying the burden of all that bullshit in my life.

You're in the fog now...embrace it!!! You GET to feel this crappy because YOU made a great choice. Explore how different you feel. Notice the fact that you no longer keep a stash in your home/car. Notice that you no longer keep an empty cup/can to spit in...you car isn't covered with little ant turds...you don't have to pat yourself down like an NSA agent administering a selfie.

You're free and you can stay free. POST ROLL and READ! You got this, brother!

Sound familiar, Matty? It sure does for me.

[Derk40]

You are winning! 4 days of freedom is pretty darn good man! Focus on this one day at a time. That is how it is done. Post ROLL early and stay poison free for the day. You can do this. Glad to be quit with you today!

[Marcusaurelius]

Welcome Matty, remember how bad the last four days have been, remember how hard the next few weeks will be, it has helped me stay quit, I never want to go through it again!!

[Bean]

Wow Matty...you are a dirtbag. I like you already! We addicts are all the same...full of deceit. We lie to those who love us the most. We're so good at lying, we can actually fool ourselves...for example, I used to consider myself a "light dipper" whatever the F that is?!! Imagine that...I used tobacco for more than 20 years, but I was just a "light" user!!!

But here's the good news....you can control it. I didn't want to admit the extent of my lying. But as soon as I realized what a turdbag I was, I developed a healthy anger towards tobacco and the selfish fuckhead I was. I threw my embarrassment, self-contempt and anger at tobacco on top of the pile of reasons I already had to quit. I realized how much of a better person/father/husband I could be. No more lying to my wife and kids about some bullshit "errand" I had to run at 10:00 at night. No more acting like an idiot wondering if I got rid of my spitter whenever she got near my car. Just no more carrying the burden of all that bullshit in my life.

You're in the fog now...embrace it!!! You GET to feel this crappy because YOU made a great choice. Explore how different you feel. Notice the fact that you no longer keep a stash in your home/car. Notice that you no longer keep an empty cup/can to spit in...you car isn't covered with little ant turds...you don't have to pat yourself down like an NSA agent administering a selfie.

You're free and you can stay free. POST ROLL and READ! You got this, brother!

[Roamcountry]

Like paradigm said...a lot of us have been in your shoes. Almost word for word in my case. Do everything you can to stay clean. There is no luck, there is no try. There is only buckle down, nut up and DO!

[Minny]

So here I am, at the beginning of day 4. Mind in state of fog, head aching, fuse short, but clean. For the first time in 15 years, I'm winning...

Great work, Matty. It's about time you've woken up and realized that Big Tobacco's products aren't worth risking it all.

You're right smack in the middle of The Suck. Embrace it: it means that you are indeed winning. Days 4, 5 , and 6 were the absolute toughest for me. Keep your guard up for lies that you who will no doubt tell yourself: that "just one" is okay, that you've earned it, or that maybe NOW is a bad time to quit.

Just focus on getting through Day 4 nic free and do WHATEVER it takes to accomplish it.

+1 with you. You got this!

[ParadigmDawg]

If you read through the other intro's you may see some of my same words on them but they always hold true so I will just repeat them...

You are in for one nasty fight but you have the tools here to make it.

Read everything on here, post roll call each morning and don't dip. Wow....that sounds so easy, doesn't it?

Go load yourself up with gum, mints, fake chew, seeds and beef jerky. Also get some member phone numbers right now, they will help you through the rough parts.

Next, exercise to exhaustion every single day and drink so much water that you feel like you may bust. Both of these will help.

Make sure your wife reads about what you are going through. 99% chance that you are going to be a short fussed dick for the next 3-4 weeks. Try not to take it out on her and the kids. Get on here and take it out on us, we will be fine.

Protect your quit right now which means to be selfish and make it the number one priority. Your head will be screwed up for awhile but you will make it.

I quit with you.

[traumagnet]

make sure you include her in this quit bring her here let her see what we are about. show her the spouses section.

Make sure you post roll. roll is the single most important thing we do here. you promise to not use nicotine for today only. wake up tomorrow and repeat.

you have my number text what have you use it if you need help. Also stick close to the site and get lots of numbers. read read read go read HOF speeches you are not different from anyone one out here. You are an addict just like us.

[B-loMatt]

Now is the best time to quit! Read everything on this site and own your quit. Get involved here and smack the poison weed down.

[gorilla1]

It was time for the lies and deceit to stop.

Yes it is.

Quit on bro. Post that roll and start getting to know some of us here. This thing really works of you want it and allow it into your life.

PM for my number and we will get busy with this thing together.