Well, I guess it’s time to finally have an introduction. I am on Day 53 with no nicotine (55 of no dip). It has actually been a fairly smooth run so far. I dipped for about 22 years, since I was 15. Always Kodiak. I would drive around from store to store until I found it. I had some brief times when I stopped but I would usually just start smoking. The last 8 years or so, I haven’t even really bothered to try to quit dipping. I usually went 2-3 days per can but I would have a dip in most of the day and evening because I would keep a dip in my mouth up to 2 hours. I haven’t spent nearly as much money on dip as a lot of people here because whenever I could I would go to Costco and pay about $14 for a log (gotta love Virginia). Like others I have read about on here, I kept my dipping away from my kids (13, 10, 6) and did not blatantly dip around my wife. We had a “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” policy about dipping. She knew I did it some but it would only get discussed every couple of months, and I would always downplay the amount I used.
I honestly donÂ’t do much on the site other than post roll every day and scan message threads. Being in the April quit group, I canÂ’t afford to post many thought provoking comments while posting roll, or else I would have bumped 3-4 other people.
I think the best advice I've seen on here is take out of this site what you want and forget about the rest. There are honestly a lot of things I donÂ’t particularly care for here, but in the grand scheme of things they donÂ’t matter for shit as long as you donÂ’t use nicotine. IÂ’m not going to get into heated discussions with the straight edge guys on here about whether or not IÂ’m committed enough; I donÂ’t like blaming the tobacco companies for my addiction. I feel like I knew exactly what I was doing; IÂ’m certainly not going to get dragged into any political discussion on here; If IÂ’m not near a phone or computer for 1 day, it's not the end of world if I miss posting roll once (I think IÂ’ve missed 2 so far).
What I am going to do is affirm that I will not dip today, whether you see my post or not.
I said that itÂ’s been pretty smooth for me which is actually pretty surprising. I have many triggers that I have been able to control. I drive around by myself for work, when I would always have a dip in. I have meetings outside on construction sites (another ridiculously easy excuse to dip). I stay up late by myself (always had to have the late night fatty). In addition, IÂ’ve had some unbelievable stress the last few months. I work for myself in real estate development and have had trouble finding enough work. My wife is in nursing school until May. I work a job on nights and weekends to help out. Life is just begging me to give up my quit but it ain't gonna happen.
There are several reasons I will give as to my success as of today:
• Fake Stuff: I ordered some Hooch and bought Smokey Mountain from Wal Mart. Addressing the oral fixation has been an absolute lifesaver. I was worried for the first few weeks about not being able to stop using it but I have dropped down to taking about 6 fake dips a week.
• Gum – Orbitz 18 pack of mint varieties from Costco. My jaw hurts some days but my breath is kick-ass!
• Support – I have a very good friend who quit 2 weeks after I did. He is going through a state government employee cessation program that has him on the patch and shit but we still can talk with each other about cravings and making sure we are staying true. My best friend since kindergarten quit last year and he provided some great perspective. And reading the message boards and stories on this site help me appreciate that I am not the only person going through this fight. If these jokers that post on here can do it then I know I sure as hell can!
• Desire – This is the most important reason. Other times I tried to quit I did it because someone else told me I was supposed to. I really wasn’t interested in quitting. This time, I knew I was ready and I could own the quit. I didn’t even tell my wife for about a week.
Sorry for the length of this post. I realize IÂ’m only 7+ weeks quit, but I really wanted to write down some of my thoughts of how I am progressing, if for nothing else than for me to look at later and if I posted it in my quit group it would get swallowed up by all the roll posts.
