Seven long days ago I sat at this desk, in front of this same computer and I had no freaking idea what I was getting myself into. I was hungover. Well, I haven't really been hungover in a decade, mostly because I haven't gone a day without at least a half dozen drinks. That's a different addiction and I'll be back to that later.
If not hungover I was in my usual haze/daze and I had a big fat lipper of Skoal Long Cut Mint. I had been marginally successful as a Ninja dipper but I was slipping, losing my edge. She found a can (must have been hidden some time ago as it was all dry) in the garage in a toolbox. Thankfully not the toolbox with the 1/2 empty (alcoholics tend to see it as half empty) bottle of Hornitos.
Anyway, I went online looking for herbal alternatives or cessation aides. I've tried the patch, the gum, the Chantix (really bad shit- stay away if possible) nothing worked. Somehow found this site, sat down and read for hours. Signed up, tossed the cans I had hidden in the house/car/garage.... I'm sure I missed one or two. Going to laugh my ass off when I find them.
Back to my point. I suffered through days 1-4. Real, physical and psychological pain. Days 5 and 6, nice. More bad habit stuff than Nic withdrawl. Then Boom. Day 7 was bad. Not so much a hard crave as a 24 hour headache. Nothing helped. Actually got some sleep for a change and feel much better today, day 8.
I have to admit that there is no way on earth that I could have made it this far without spending a good deal of time on here with my brothers and sisters in Quit. Posting Roll makes it real. I honest to God find myself thinking how, in maybe a month or two, I can have a dip. I don't think about one today because, well, dammit, I posted Roll and I'm going to honor that.
The other reason I'm still quit, and plan on being so for good, is I haven't had a drop to drink. I know that if I have one I'll have a dozen and somewhere between 3 and 4 I'll sneak out, probably drive drunk (why should today be different right?) and buy a fucking can. Well, I'm not going to buy a can so I don't drink. My Dip Quit is so fucking important to me that I will not drink. Hard for me to believe but there it is. One Day at a Time and Killing two birds with one stone. Fuck Yeah.
Thanks folks, I really couldn't do this without you and I Quit Like Fuck with All Y'all every fucking day!
Griff Day 8