I'm actually more stressed by reading the posts, which isn't going to help. This is a big thing for me as you all know, so I don't need more stress right now. I'm already dealing with 30 inches of snow for that.
I know what it takes to quit, I've done it twice. I'm having a little harder time of it right now. I have to get my mind set. It's easier to start tomorrow because its a new day. That probably sounds like bull to most of you but its not to me. Plus I have 8 hours going for me when i start. I need little props to do it, like a notebook i will keep at work to read a few times a day with all the bad things it does, etc.
I really don't want all the people jumping on me and nagging me. If that is what this is about then that won't work for me.
I'd just like to check in every day and report. I thought that might be a little prop for me. Its not so easy to just do it. You all have been out of it for a while. I remember that ... when I had quit before, thinking how easy it is to quit... why didn't I just do it right away..... Those who have quit for a while need to remember just how hard it is. So please... drop the nagging and support me. I'll read the other articles again to get motivated. I'll give it another chance, but so far its not what i had hoped for.
Hi Murtha, Glad to have you here :P
I guess you can say this site is full of hard core quitters. Let me start by saying that I am not one of those that "have been out of it for a while". I am on day 14 of my quit, but I know, without question, that I am quit today, and I'll be quit tomorrow, and there is nothing that will make me put that shit back in my body. More on this in a bit:
What you will find out about this site is that it works BECAUSE of the hard love shown you so far and because of the wisdom that people are trying to share with you.
A successful quit is different than a temporary stoppage. We have all stopped in the past, most of us many times. So what is different now? What about the approach of this site makes quits out of stops? This is what I've learned so far:
1. There is no such thing as a passive quit. You are either quit or you are just fooling around. It is a black and white situation, no shades of gray. Do or do not, there is no try. That starts with eliminating all passive speech (text). Don't talk of luck, don't talk of trying, don't talk of hoping, just BE quit, period.
2. No bull zone. Caving to temptation starts out with very subtle deceptions that build until you can justify giving in. This is your mind playing tricks on you. We often don't even realize it is happening until someone else calls us on it. This group of people, while seemingly harsh, will call you on the bull and save you from yourself, and possibly save your life.
3. Knowlege is power. By knowing what is happening to you and what is yet to come, you can be better prepared to deal with things. Yes, there are physical withdrawal problems that come in stages over months. The people here have been through all the stages and have documented them for us, and they are here to help us through them all. The harder part is the mental dependency we have and dealing with that absolutely requires a firm hand, and sometimes a foot. Don't run from it, embrace it (thank you sir, may I have another).
4. Your Beliefs Matter. You have to not think you can quit, you have to know you will. How can you know you will quit? By realizing that you are no different than so many other people on this site because you have read all their stories and see yourself in those stories, and because you are no different than them, if they can be quit, you will be quit too. You also have to believe, not just think, but believe to your core that tobaco makes anything and everything worse, not better, no matter what your nic-drugged mind tries to tell you. As a fellow addict, you and I can no longer trust our judgement, feelings, intuition or logic when it comes to nicotine. You have to accept, based on all the overwhelming evidence found in this site and it's resource links, that it is bad for ALL situations, no matter what.
So, back to me, how do I know, without a doubt, that this quit will be different from all the other stoppages I had over the past 30 years of nicotine addiction? 1 - each day I will give my word to people (not a notebook) that I AM quit today and they will hold me accountable and bust my ass if I break my word. 2 - If I start showing any signs of slipping in my resolve by using passive wording, or setting up situations that will make it easier to cave, someone here will point it out and stop me before I go too far. 3 - I won't be caught by surprise this time. When I tried to quit before, I would get only so far (once 4 months) and cave because I was depressed and convinced myself that if I'm going to feel that bad when not dipping, I might as well enjoy a dip too. I didn't realize that the depression was just another phase of the quit process. Now I have better knowlege thanks to this site and the people here. 4 - I know for a fact it is possible because I see so many people here every day that are quit and I be damned if I am going to allow myself to be any less of a man than these fine role models. I also know for a fact, thanks to all the research resources provide by this site, that tobaco is much worse for me than having no tobaco with all else being equal.
Well that's a lot of words I just spit out all to say that this site works, will work for you if you let it, and to encourage you to stick around with me and the rest of the May quit group. Just accept the assistance from those who have gone before us, in all it's forms, and we will be quit together today.
Mark
