Day 10.
Albert Einstein once said "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results".
Let that soak in. For those of us who have quit in the past using the original or current incarnation of QSX AND have caved after a long time nicotine free, we need to think long and hard about what we are going to do differently this time to achieve a different result - a permanent quit.
There are at least three individuals in my June group including me who are doing this again.
Here is what I am going to to differently:
1. Post roll call or check in daily via text or pda - as long as it takes. I may need to do this for months, years, decades, or even the rest of my hopefully long life. Last time, I slacked off after about 6 months and paid the price in early 2006.
2. Acknowledge that I am an addict and never, ever, ever think that I have this addiction permanently beat. I thought I had this beat the last time. WRONG
3. Acknowledge that this addiction is bigger than me, will be bigger than me for a long time or for my lifetime. I cannot fight this alone. As such, I will leverage off of the collective strength of this group - both as a giver and recipient of the support that is here. I may need to do this for months, years, decades, or even the rest of my hopefully long life. Last time, I thought I could go it alone without any support from the outside. WRONG
4. I have a plan in place, which is as follows:
A. Check in daily.
B. If I wish to cave, make sure I talk to someone live, and preferably several people live, on this board to get permission.
C. If I wish to cave, look my son and wife in the eye and tell them that feeding a pointless addiction and probably dying of cancer is more important than their well being or mine.
D. If I wish to cave, I will publicly sign the "contract" and post it here for all to see.
E. Provide support to others.
Last time, I did not have a plan or any accountability.
So ask yourself, if you have unsuccessfully "tried" this before, what are you going to do differently to achieve a different result this time?
If you had strict accountability, would you have caved? How about a good plan? How about checking in daily? Would you have caved? I can honestly say I would not have caved and would be approaching 1,900 days.
Moderators or veterans - I have studied this community for the past few days. I would like to know if there is anyone who caved after (i) reaching out to fellow quitters in a time of need - especially the caving incident, (ii) posting roll call daily, and (iii) having a plan and being accountable. I suspect not...