Howdy - here I go ...

[BearHawk]

Oh wow this last Friday night I had the most intense dip dream ever.  It felt so real that during the dream I felt so bad for dipping that I was wondering what I was going to say to all my brothers and sisters out about my cave.  However when I woke up I realized it was all a dream but it did shake me a little that I went to the bathroom and checked my teeth and gums to be sure.  I also immediately texted my bro DaBean and let him know I was still quit NAFAR!.  This is as far as I have ever been quit in a whole lot of years and I am staying strong but WOW that ol' Nic Witch sure snuck up into my dreams the other night.  Thanks bros for your support and this does strengthen my quit and my resolve to stay quit.  If the Nic Witch can't get to me in the real world and I can stay strong in the dream would I know I'm doing something right.

I figured it out ... when I'm bone ass tired the dip dreams come. Last night after working my ass off decorating my house for Christmas (After watching my Raiders fall once again) I went to be and fell asleep hard and sure enough I got a dip dream. It didn't bug me this time at all. I knew it was a dream the entire time. Funny how the brain works. I just laughed at myself and had a beer. I am really starting to love this being quit ... knowing I have to keep my promise daily and staying accountable is the best Christmas present I have given myself. ODAAT NAFAR keep me strong. Hangin' in with my KTC Bros and sis's

Well my hard work decorating the house paid off. The Kolar family won first place in our neighborhood decorating contest. So it was well worth the dip dream. Merry Christmas to you all.

Well having to work Christmas eve and Christmas with on one else around gave me lots of time to think. We all know that when BearHawk thinks it isn't always a good thing. So well I was thinking about how I'm not such a Asshole now that I've quit nicotine and I was wondering why that was. So it occurred to me that when you are so hooked on nic you spend over half your time on the verge of withdrawal and so you spend over half your time being an asshole. Think about it ... if you were like me and had a dip in your mouth all day long you were either thinking of your next fresh dip; then your can was running low so you were thinking about getting that next can and shit if you ran out before you got that can, heave help the people standing in the way. Then only time you are truly feeling good is when you opened that fresh can and took that fresh dip, everything else was about getting to the next one.

So at any rate this Christmas was awesome not having tobacco juice running down my chin as we opened our gifts. The only time I thought about snuff was when I was posting that I wouldn't use. I'm even going through the days without chewing gum at all or with just one or two sticks. I have never felt more quit. That is not to say that I have a thought that I am cured. Oh hell no. I know that I will always be a drooling snuff fiend. These are the times I know I need to be here the most.

I was reading here the other day and this ass wipe was saying that we who post daily are self-centered ass holes and I guess in a way he is right. I am centered on my quit and coming here is all about me staying quit so in a way in is all about me. But then of course the shit bag was all wrong too. I stay here and stay quit to encourage others to do the same and be just like me and the thousands of others who stay quit for life.

Reading the upcoming events and I see brothers who have been quit for 8 years and I think because of them I am going to stay here that long and I am going to stay here so other newbies can see how it goes, step by step, me at 134 days and the next guy at 200 and there is a sister at one year and then there are bothers at 1000 days and so on. Man this place amazes me and I am all for the power of quit.

[BearHawk]

Oh wow this last Friday night I had the most intense dip dream ever.  It felt so real that during the dream I felt so bad for dipping that I was wondering what I was going to say to all my brothers and sisters out about my cave.  However when I woke up I realized it was all a dream but it did shake me a little that I went to the bathroom and checked my teeth and gums to be sure.  I also immediately texted my bro DaBean and let him know I was still quit NAFAR!.  This is as far as I have ever been quit in a whole lot of years and I am staying strong but WOW that ol' Nic Witch sure snuck up into my dreams the other night.  Thanks bros for your support and this does strengthen my quit and my resolve to stay quit.  If the Nic Witch can't get to me in the real world and I can stay strong in the dream would I know I'm doing something right.

I figured it out ... when I'm bone ass tired the dip dreams come. Last night after working my ass off decorating my house for Christmas (After watching my Raiders fall once again) I went to be and fell asleep hard and sure enough I got a dip dream. It didn't bug me this time at all. I knew it was a dream the entire time. Funny how the brain works. I just laughed at myself and had a beer. I am really starting to love this being quit ... knowing I have to keep my promise daily and staying accountable is the best Christmas present I have given myself. ODAAT NAFAR keep me strong. Hangin' in with my KTC Bros and sis's

Well my hard work decorating the house paid off. The Kolar family won first place in our neighborhood decorating contest. So it was well worth the dip dream. Merry Christmas to you all.

[BearHawk]

Oh wow this last Friday night I had the most intense dip dream ever. It felt so real that during the dream I felt so bad for dipping that I was wondering what I was going to say to all my brothers and sisters out about my cave. However when I woke up I realized it was all a dream but it did shake me a little that I went to the bathroom and checked my teeth and gums to be sure. I also immediately texted my bro DaBean and let him know I was still quit NAFAR!. This is as far as I have ever been quit in a whole lot of years and I am staying strong but WOW that ol' Nic Witch sure snuck up into my dreams the other night. Thanks bros for your support and this does strengthen my quit and my resolve to stay quit. If the Nic Witch can't get to me in the real world and I can stay strong in the dream would I know I'm doing something right.

I figured it out ... when I'm bone ass tired the dip dreams come. Last night after working my ass off decorating my house for Christmas (After watching my Raiders fall once again) I went to be and fell asleep hard and sure enough I got a dip dream. It didn't bug me this time at all. I knew it was a dream the entire time. Funny how the brain works. I just laughed at myself and had a beer. I am really starting to love this being quit ... knowing I have to keep my promise daily and staying accountable is the best Christmas present I have given myself. ODAAT NAFAR keep me strong. Hangin' in with my KTC Bros and sis's

[BearHawk]

Oh wow this last Friday night I had the most intense dip dream ever. It felt so real that during the dream I felt so bad for dipping that I was wondering what I was going to say to all my brothers and sisters out about my cave. However when I woke up I realized it was all a dream but it did shake me a little that I went to the bathroom and checked my teeth and gums to be sure. I also immediately texted my bro DaBean and let him know I was still quit NAFAR!. This is as far as I have ever been quit in a whole lot of years and I am staying strong but WOW that ol' Nic Witch sure snuck up into my dreams the other night. Thanks bros for your support and this does strengthen my quit and my resolve to stay quit. If the Nic Witch can't get to me in the real world and I can stay strong in the dream would I know I'm doing something right.

[rdad]

Well here I am at 107 days and still I get the off the wall crave or reaction.  Back 2 days ago I was slammed at work and busier that a one armed paper hanger when I finally got lunch I went and sat down and reached for my pocket where the can used to be.  I of course just rolled my eyes and chuckled, stuck a stick of gum in my mouth and headed back to work. 

Last night it much have been the turkey, but I had a dip dream and woke up shaking my head and thinking well just goes to show you it ain't ever gonna be gone. 

Digging on through brothers and sisters. Wining the battles but the war still goes on.

Keep up the good fight and the inspiration! Congrats in 100 days quit.

10 days of vaction without nic was completely wonderful. I can't remember the last time I could do anything without having to plan how much snuff I would need. This time I just had a wonderful time with the family without having to think about tobacco at all. This is because with all the support from them and here with KTC I am quit. We had a great time at Disneyland and driving the coast. Thank you brothers and sisters for posting and support
BearHawk
I live on the same coast as you. I think that is so awesome that you had a good quit 10 day holiday with your family. I'm looking forward to feeling good enough to do that. Congrats on 100 days!

[BearHawk]

Well here I am at 107 days and still I get the off the wall crave or reaction.  Back 2 days ago I was slammed at work and busier that a one armed paper hanger when I finally got lunch I went and sat down and reached for my pocket where the can used to be.  I of course just rolled my eyes and chuckled, stuck a stick of gum in my mouth and headed back to work. 

Last night it much have been the turkey, but I had a dip dream and woke up shaking my head and thinking well just goes to show you it ain't ever gonna be gone. 

Digging on through brothers and sisters. Wining the battles but the war still goes on.

Keep up the good fight and the inspiration! Congrats in 100 days quit.

10 days of vaction without nic was completely wonderful. I can't remember the last time I could do anything without having to plan how much snuff I would need. This time I just had a wonderful time with the family without having to think about tobacco at all. This is because with all the support from them and here with KTC I am quit. We had a great time at Disneyland and driving the coast. Thank you brothers and sisters for posting and support

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

Well here I am at 107 days and still I get the off the wall crave or reaction. Back 2 days ago I was slammed at work and busier that a one armed paper hanger when I finally got lunch I went and sat down and reached for my pocket where the can used to be. I of course just rolled my eyes and chuckled, stuck a stick of gum in my mouth and headed back to work.

Last night it much have been the turkey, but I had a dip dream and woke up shaking my head and thinking well just goes to show you it ain't ever gonna be gone.

Digging on through brothers and sisters. Wining the battles but the war still goes on.

Keep up the good fight and the inspiration! Congrats in 100 days quit.

[BearHawk]

Well here I am at 107 days and still I get the off the wall crave or reaction. Back 2 days ago I was slammed at work and busier that a one armed paper hanger when I finally got lunch I went and sat down and reached for my pocket where the can used to be. I of course just rolled my eyes and chuckled, stuck a stick of gum in my mouth and headed back to work.

Last night it much have been the turkey, but I had a dip dream and woke up shaking my head and thinking well just goes to show you it ain't ever gonna be gone.

Digging on through brothers and sisters. Wining the battles but the war still goes on.

[BearHawk]

Congrats on hitting your HOF, celebrate today, and understand that this is a milestone not a goal line!

Pinched

congrats on your 100 day mark just keep on quitting

Hey thank you all for your support. I know that this is just one step in the thousands I will take to keep quit for the rest of my life and I know that being here is what keeps me quit. The hard ass support from all of you makes me stronger. Nice to be on that train with all of you. Raising a glass of dark porter with you all.

[Dave1903]

Congrats on hitting your HOF, celebrate today, and understand that this is a milestone not a goal line!

Pinched

congrats on your 100 day mark just keep on quitting

[Pinched]

Congrats on hitting your HOF, celebrate today, and understand that this is a milestone not a goal line!

Pinched

[Jlud007]

Now we head out west to pick up Bearhawk who wrote his own boarding intro so well I didn't need to change a thing.

"You really messed up asking me so many questions; here goes:

BearHawk (Jim) I've been married to my wife Kathy for 24 years and we have 3 Children (G/B/G) all now over 18 years old. I'm an old Army brat and have lived all over but I call Medina Texas my home town. I now live in Chula Vista California (SoCal). I started dipping in 1974 when I was 14 years old on that day I was introduced to Snuff and Chewing tobacco by all my new friends in Medina and so I had to try it all; I had Happy Days raspberry, Shoal, Garrett, Redman, Copenhagen and the most god awful stuff called Day Work. As you can imagine my stomach was doing flip flops that day, but I settled down to use Cope for the most part of all those years until the cost of Cope went to over 5 dollars a can so I went to Grizzly Snuff for the last couple years. I went between a can a day to a can every 2 days and I average it out to about .75 cans a day there when I quit again for the 900th time 100 days ago. The craziest thing I ever have done; well I spent 20 years in the U.S. Navy and I've been around the world quite a few times and have done quite a few crazy things (So i'd have to kill you for if I told you.), so it's hard to pin point the one craziest so I am going to say spending 20 years in the Navy is the craziest thing I have done. To celebrate my 100 days quit my eldest daughter is giving me a party. She says you can't dip anymore but no one said you can't have a few drinks; I love the young lady! I already signed up for 200 days. It was a rough start here but I have taken on this site and I am going to stick with it. I don't always agree with these crazy brothers but there is no doubt that KTC is working for me. What I bring to the train, well after serving in the Military I am one loyal SOB and I stand up for my brothers. And I brew my own beer when I canl My only words of wisdom to the group in once you make up your mind to do something stick with it and stick with it hard. My favorite saying in life is Push, Pull or get the Fuck out of the way. Right now I work as the lead security supervisor for a very important athletic site. My favorite hobbies all deal with working with my hands and choking on saw dust or getting greasy. My favorite sports teams all have black as their colors (Black and Silver or Black and White), Raiders, Spurs, Kings etc. My Favorite Avatar belongs to KKLJINC, Man have I felt like that a few times over the last 100 days. My brothers Dean and Mike have kept me going here in this group of Skydiving idiots and I look forward to keeping quit with them for life. And AppleJack and KKLJINC have been awesome support too. I don't have access to a computer at home yet so I am limited to what I can do through the day but I am starting to give back and support others. KTC is the real stuff and I want to thank all my brothers out there for supporting me, putting up with my BA in the beginning and helping me get through the rough parts. Keep it classy my brothers and quit on! "

Congratulations Jim on 100 days of quit!

[BearHawk]

It gets really tough when you get close to a band of brothers and then someone from outside the group comes along and like wastes one of your brothers. That what if feels like having KTC come along and Kill Paddy. I really would like to go and dig into the past of some of these people and see if they ever lied and I wonder if once they were caught in their lies if they hadn't wanted forgiveness? Hey I'm not going to ditch my other brothers but HOLY SHIT people??? Paddy was out there and he was supporting his brothers. So he hid the fact that he caved 3 days in ... but he got back up and got back in line and he didn't hurt anyone doing it. The brother was there and supported me in my quit and he made it 107 fucking days quit after his cave. He was still in the November group so he didn't hurt anyone. So to those of you who want to play like you're some kind of victim and some how you think you're hurt by what Paddy did 'Finger' . I feels like you when off and killed one of your own. I feel now that I need to only stick near those brothers I know will back me and watch my back from the others.

By the way that attitude ... It only hurts the quit of others. I'll be sure to keep the blinders off event though I will keep supporting KTC, it's because of my brothers and sisters and not to support those who killed my brother.

[AppleJack]

Hell. Yes.

It only keeps getting better bro! Learning to live, really live, without a drug is a rush. If can be scary but that's what makes it fun. Rock on...

[BearHawk]

Just 10 days away from 100 days. Every morning I get up and think of the number of days I am quit and that I am staying quit one more day. Every night I think about how I made it clean through the day and how tomorrow is a new day quit. I think about my brothers out there who are quit with me at those times too, but the best part about being quit this long ... I'm not thinking about it every minute I am awake now. I know I am quit because I'm not going ape shit at every thought of tobacco: I'm not thinking about tobacco. I am thinking like a true quitter and I am now living my life: nicotine isn't running my life for me.

I now that it will always be there but I know with my brothers and sisters that I am quit for life.