Today is my day and I am thankful as hell my brother in law turned me onto this site. Grizzly was the worst thing to ever fucking happen to me. Kodiak was getting pricey and I was getting tired of shelling out almost 5 bucks a tin a day....I had quit to get life insurance (cold) for 3 months and then I came across the Grizz.....put that damn varsity jacket back on and boy did she fit well... Damnit i truly hate the shit and everything about it. I hate hiding it from my kids, pretending I am hiding it from my wife and that she doesn't know that when I retire down to my man cave I am immediately packing a tin. Hate fucking everything it stands for, because it stands for lies, dishonesty and nothing but a bad future.. Starting at 16 was a long time ago ( hell who am I kiding, I had my first leaf of beach nut in the 4th grade wearing my George Brett cleats and playing baseball) and at 42, I can see my 50's right around the corner and they don't include teeth....I tried to start yesterday and I fell off the horse the very first day damnit. Justified that I couldn't quit cold, 1 a day till the tin is gone,...yeah that's it,....ease into it. So I threw in a lip per last night for all of 10minutes after making a good first day of it. Now today I am anxious, my head hurts, I am angry with my 2 boys and over reacting to stupid shit. Oh and my skin is fucking itchy on my arms..(that's a new one on me.) I am flushing the remainder of said tin, cowboying up and taking the gosh damn panties off. I love my wife, I love my boys and I love myself too damn much to be a slave to this shit. Thanks Joel for the reach out brother....damn....this sucks!