KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: MuleMan on December 29, 2019, 08:57:28 AM
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Hi all; new to this resource; just wanna quickly introduce myself. I'm a 40 something married father of 4 in northeast. was ~6 yrs into my latest dip.
glad for all the info I found here to help plan quit. right now I'm About 30 hours into my quit (started midnight on 12/28/19); going well so far I'm heavily relying on all kinds of fake dip to deal with oral stimulation.
I pledge to not use any nicotine today.
BTW - I just gave my final real can to my 12 yo son to discard and shared with him my promise to be done forever. Its real; no going back.
Here's to hoping that today is as manageable as yesterday was.
God bless
MuleMan
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Welcome MuleMan - congratulations on embracing freedom. Don't look back, look forward. Each day is a new day of freedom.
Make your way to April 2020 Quit Group (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?topic=16165.msg7673780#new).
Post your promise there, do it every day, do it early. We call it Wake Up Piss Post (WUPP). For most of us, the nicotine hit was the first thing we did every day.
That's why the promise not to use is done first thing, every day.
There's some informative links in my signature about nicotine and addiction (it's not a habit, it's an addiction). Read all that you can and educate yourself.
Knowledge is power, ignorance is terribly expensive.
Great to have you aboard
IQWYT
Athan
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Hey MuleMan, welcome to KTC. I am also a 40 something married father of 4 from the Midwest. I am on day 71 of my quit after dipping off and on (mostly on) since college. This site can help but only if you want to quit for yourself. I am telling you being quit is awesome - being owned but dip. If you need more accountability, send me a pm and I will give you my number.
Cspence
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Hey MuleMan, welcome to KTC. I am also a 40 something married father of 4 from the Midwest. I am on day 71 of my quit after dipping off and on (mostly on) since college. This site can help but only if you want to quit for yourself. I am telling you being quit is awesome - being owned but dip. If you need more accountability, send me a pm and I will give you my number.
Cspence
Meant to say not being owned by dip is awesome.
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Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
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Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
Welcome. Make relationships as they will be worth there weight in gold. Exchange digits only through messages and never on the forum. Reach out if you want my help.
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Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
Hi @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417), I am 35 days into my quit. Still learning daily. Rage was my biggest obstacle. The first week was the worst. « Reply #16 on: December 02, 2019, 07:50:38 PM » in Olcpo Introduction "Day one" pages 4-5. This one was the peak, it got better fast after this. I have tried to blog every day, what I felt and what was new. Mostly to remind me of what I went through so I don't go back. I am sharing this spot on the site not so you can read about me, but so you can read the great advice I got from the vets on how they managed the rage and stress.
You are right that your quit is the most important right now. Honesty with my family as to what I was/am feeling and saying I'm sorry a lot. For me, prayer was/is essential. I have to give it to God, I cannot do it myself. Each instance feeling the anger/rage starting, learning what it fees like before I am in it, heading it off before it erupts. Walking away from situations, take a deep breath and a drink of water, pause for a moment, then go back and finish. One Minute At A Time = OMAAT One Second... One DayAAT Whatever it takes.
It does get better. It is a roller coaster. a few good days/hours and then "where did this come from" One hour at a time. I have to focus on the good minutes hours days. Now they really outnumber the bad and pretty much since week 2. Going back is not an option. I haven't called anyone yet. I should and will if for no other reason than to establish communication and Thank them for caring about me and my quit. I have their numbers (digits) programmed in my phone (which I rarely use because it doesn't work well where I live) in case I need to call them. If you want my digits or anything else, PM me and I will be glad to share mine. Your quit is a lot like a Mule, learn to read it like you do a mule.
@olcpo (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16159)
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Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
Hi @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417), I am 35 days into my quit. Still learning daily. Rage was my biggest obstacle. The first week was the worst. « Reply #16 on: December 02, 2019, 07:50:38 PM » in Olcpo Introduction "Day one" pages 4-5. This one was the peak, it got better fast after this. I have tried to blog every day, what I felt and what was new. Mostly to remind me of what I went through so I don't go back. I am sharing this spot on the site not so you can read about me, but so you can read the great advice I got from the vets on how they managed the rage and stress.
You are right that your quit is the most important right now. Honesty with my family as to what I was/am feeling and saying I'm sorry a lot. For me, prayer was/is essential. I have to give it to God, I cannot do it myself. Each instance feeling the anger/rage starting, learning what it fees like before I am in it, heading it off before it erupts. Walking away from situations, take a deep breath and a drink of water, pause for a moment, then go back and finish. One Minute At A Time = OMAAT One Second... One DayAAT Whatever it takes.
It does get better. It is a roller coaster. a few good days/hours and then "where did this come from" One hour at a time. I have to focus on the good minutes hours days. Now they really outnumber the bad and pretty much since week 2. Going back is not an option. I haven't called anyone yet. I should and will if for no other reason than to establish communication and Thank them for caring about me and my quit. I have their numbers (digits) programmed in my phone (which I rarely use because it doesn't work well where I live) in case I need to call them. If you want my digits or anything else, PM me and I will be glad to share mine. Your quit is a lot like a Mule, learn to read it like you do a mule.
@olcpo (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16159)
Thanks olcpo - I read this closely- makes a lot of sense. Glad to hear of your quit and progress. Excited to reach Day 30; feels a long way off. This community has been a real blessing. God Bless you!
MuleMan
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Hey @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417)
I am also a 40 something, father of 4, from the Northeast. Your intro could be mine (or many others here). I used for a long time and relied on nic for everything I did during the course of a day. At day 169 my life is easier than it was in the first several weeks. WUPP, do everything you need to do to keep that shit out of your face, sleep, repeat. Not easy but simple. Make some relationships as soon as you can for some added accountability. You are less likely to cave if you have promised people you have a relationship with that you would not... if your word means anything, that is.
You can do this brother. PM me for digits if you like. Take it slow. Hold the line.
PTBQWYT my friend.
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Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
Hi @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417), I am 35 days into my quit. Still learning daily. Rage was my biggest obstacle. The first week was the worst. « Reply #16 on: December 02, 2019, 07:50:38 PM » in Olcpo Introduction "Day one" pages 4-5. This one was the peak, it got better fast after this. I have tried to blog every day, what I felt and what was new. Mostly to remind me of what I went through so I don't go back. I am sharing this spot on the site not so you can read about me, but so you can read the great advice I got from the vets on how they managed the rage and stress.
You are right that your quit is the most important right now. Honesty with my family as to what I was/am feeling and saying I'm sorry a lot. For me, prayer was/is essential. I have to give it to God, I cannot do it myself. Each instance feeling the anger/rage starting, learning what it fees like before I am in it, heading it off before it erupts. Walking away from situations, take a deep breath and a drink of water, pause for a moment, then go back and finish. One Minute At A Time = OMAAT One Second... One DayAAT Whatever it takes.
It does get better. It is a roller coaster. a few good days/hours and then "where did this come from" One hour at a time. I have to focus on the good minutes hours days. Now they really outnumber the bad and pretty much since week 2. Going back is not an option. I haven't called anyone yet. I should and will if for no other reason than to establish communication and Thank them for caring about me and my quit. I have their numbers (digits) programmed in my phone (which I rarely use because it doesn't work well where I live) in case I need to call them. If you want my digits or anything else, PM me and I will be glad to share mine. Your quit is a lot like a Mule, learn to read it like you do a mule.
@olcpo (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16159)
Thanks olcpo - I read this closely- makes a lot of sense. Glad to hear of your quit and progress. Excited to reach Day 30; feels a long way off. This community has been a real blessing. God Bless you!
MuleMan
You've got this. The nicotine is about gone from your system. Now the games begin. Take it easy on yourself, if you can, choose low/no stress. Drink lots of water, flush the crap out of your system. Staying busy and working hard so I am physically tired really helped me, still is. One of the vets here shared, "You can't control what life or the world brings you, but you can control what you put in your mouth. Chew NEVER fixed anything (problem + chew = 2 problems)."
The days will go by fast as you observe the changes you are going through. The fog will go away. My forehead was tight, almost a headache, for a week. I cut my coffee back to about half for a few weeks. Without the nicotine and all the other crap the caffeine was stronger. I had trouble concentrating, mind seemed scattered, everything seemed intense. The only thing that helped was a change of location and what I was doing. This was the first week and then I noticed when it came on it went away faster, not as often and less intense. Give it time and be patient with yourself. This is a big deal to the body and takes time.
-
Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
Hi @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417), I am 35 days into my quit. Still learning daily. Rage was my biggest obstacle. The first week was the worst. « Reply #16 on: December 02, 2019, 07:50:38 PM » in Olcpo Introduction "Day one" pages 4-5. This one was the peak, it got better fast after this. I have tried to blog every day, what I felt and what was new. Mostly to remind me of what I went through so I don't go back. I am sharing this spot on the site not so you can read about me, but so you can read the great advice I got from the vets on how they managed the rage and stress.
You are right that your quit is the most important right now. Honesty with my family as to what I was/am feeling and saying I'm sorry a lot. For me, prayer was/is essential. I have to give it to God, I cannot do it myself. Each instance feeling the anger/rage starting, learning what it fees like before I am in it, heading it off before it erupts. Walking away from situations, take a deep breath and a drink of water, pause for a moment, then go back and finish. One Minute At A Time = OMAAT One Second... One DayAAT Whatever it takes.
It does get better. It is a roller coaster. a few good days/hours and then "where did this come from" One hour at a time. I have to focus on the good minutes hours days. Now they really outnumber the bad and pretty much since week 2. Going back is not an option. I haven't called anyone yet. I should and will if for no other reason than to establish communication and Thank them for caring about me and my quit. I have their numbers (digits) programmed in my phone (which I rarely use because it doesn't work well where I live) in case I need to call them. If you want my digits or anything else, PM me and I will be glad to share mine. Your quit is a lot like a Mule, learn to read it like you do a mule.
@olcpo (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16159)
Thanks olcpo - I read this closely- makes a lot of sense. Glad to hear of your quit and progress. Excited to reach Day 30; feels a long way off. This community has been a real blessing. God Bless you!
MuleMan
You've got this. The nicotine is about gone from your system. Now the games begin. Take it easy on yourself, if you can, choose low/no stress. Drink lots of water, flush the crap out of your system. Staying busy and working hard so I am physically tired really helped me, still is. One of the vets here shared, "You can't control what life or the world brings you, but you can control what you put in your mouth. Chew NEVER fixed anything (problem + chew = 2 problems)."
The days will go by fast as you observe the changes you are going through. The fog will go away. My forehead was tight, almost a headache, for a week. I cut my coffee back to about half for a few weeks. Without the nicotine and all the other crap the caffeine was stronger. I had trouble concentrating, mind seemed scattered, everything seemed intense. The only thing that helped was a change of location and what I was doing. This was the first week and then I noticed when it came on it went away faster, not as often and less intense. Give it time and be patient with yourself. This is a big deal to the body and takes time.
Great choice in quitting, Muleman. We've all experienced the rage while trying to quit. It's difficult to lash out at loved ones and not think that it is worth quitting, and that it's better to keep feeding the beast to keep it tame.
However, you must go thru the rage, the fog, sleeplessness, the suck, anxiety, depression, and the utter misery to free yourself from the chains by which you bound yourself. And by choice you simply unlock the shackles and walk away. Run like hell at times.
It's a bitch of a trail to trod but a well trodden trail nonetheless. We've all been where you are at. Quitting for the rest of your life and dealing with all the aforementioned withdrawal symptoms is too much to handle, so, a couple of tips:
WUPP - that means post a daily promise ASAFP. What better way to start a day than with a renewed commitment to be quit?
ODAAT - that means you don't have to quit for week, month, year at a time. It just means you gotta quit for only one day at a time.
Collect Digits - it's weird at first, but you'll find immense value in the safety net that this botherhood can provide. BROTHERHOOD + ACCOUNTABILITY = SUCCESS.
Rage here, in the forums - not at home or at work. Bring all that here, it's what we are here for, hear?
Finally, Quit for YOU, and for YOU only. This requires you to believe that you can quit. We believe you can, because we believe in ourselves and in our quit commrades.
Again, great choice in quitting, and an even better choice doing it with KTC
BMC 815
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Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
Hi @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417), I am 35 days into my quit. Still learning daily. Rage was my biggest obstacle. The first week was the worst. « Reply #16 on: December 02, 2019, 07:50:38 PM » in Olcpo Introduction "Day one" pages 4-5. This one was the peak, it got better fast after this. I have tried to blog every day, what I felt and what was new. Mostly to remind me of what I went through so I don't go back. I am sharing this spot on the site not so you can read about me, but so you can read the great advice I got from the vets on how they managed the rage and stress.
You are right that your quit is the most important right now. Honesty with my family as to what I was/am feeling and saying I'm sorry a lot. For me, prayer was/is essential. I have to give it to God, I cannot do it myself. Each instance feeling the anger/rage starting, learning what it fees like before I am in it, heading it off before it erupts. Walking away from situations, take a deep breath and a drink of water, pause for a moment, then go back and finish. One Minute At A Time = OMAAT One Second... One DayAAT Whatever it takes.
It does get better. It is a roller coaster. a few good days/hours and then "where did this come from" One hour at a time. I have to focus on the good minutes hours days. Now they really outnumber the bad and pretty much since week 2. Going back is not an option. I haven't called anyone yet. I should and will if for no other reason than to establish communication and Thank them for caring about me and my quit. I have their numbers (digits) programmed in my phone (which I rarely use because it doesn't work well where I live) in case I need to call them. If you want my digits or anything else, PM me and I will be glad to share mine. Your quit is a lot like a Mule, learn to read it like you do a mule.
@olcpo (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16159)
Thanks olcpo - I read this closely- makes a lot of sense. Glad to hear of your quit and progress. Excited to reach Day 30; feels a long way off. This community has been a real blessing. God Bless you!
MuleMan
You've got this. The nicotine is about gone from your system. Now the games begin. Take it easy on yourself, if you can, choose low/no stress. Drink lots of water, flush the crap out of your system. Staying busy and working hard so I am physically tired really helped me, still is. One of the vets here shared, "You can't control what life or the world brings you, but you can control what you put in your mouth. Chew NEVER fixed anything (problem + chew = 2 problems)."
The days will go by fast as you observe the changes you are going through. The fog will go away. My forehead was tight, almost a headache, for a week. I cut my coffee back to about half for a few weeks. Without the nicotine and all the other crap the caffeine was stronger. I had trouble concentrating, mind seemed scattered, everything seemed intense. The only thing that helped was a change of location and what I was doing. This was the first week and then I noticed when it came on it went away faster, not as often and less intense. Give it time and be patient with yourself. This is a big deal to the body and takes time.
Great choice in quitting, Muleman. We've all experienced the rage while trying to quit. It's difficult to lash out at loved ones and not think that it is worth quitting, and that it's better to keep feeding the beast to keep it tame.
However, you must go thru the rage, the fog, sleeplessness, the suck, anxiety, depression, and the utter misery to free yourself from the chains by which you bound yourself. And by choice you simply unlock the shackles and walk away. Run like hell at times.
It's a bitch of a trail to trod but a well trodden trail nonetheless. We've all been where you are at. Quitting for the rest of your life and dealing with all the aforementioned withdrawal symptoms is too much to handle, so, a couple of tips:
WUPP - that means post a daily promise ASAFP. What better way to start a day than with a renewed commitment to be quit?
ODAAT - that means you don't have to quit for week, month, year at a time. It just means you gotta quit for only one day at a time.
Collect Digits - it's weird at first, but you'll find immense value in the safety net that this botherhood can provide. BROTHERHOOD + ACCOUNTABILITY = SUCCESS.
Rage here, in the forums - not at home or at work. Bring all that here, it's what we are here for, hear?
Finally, Quit for YOU, and for YOU only. This requires you to believe that you can quit. We believe you can, because we believe in ourselves and in our quit commrades.
Again, great choice in quitting, and an even better choice doing it with KTC
BMC 815
...I forgot one of the most important things: learn some emoticons. Here's some to get you started:
'chew3' 'party' 'zombie' 'Pot' 'Pop'
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Glad to have you in the best quit month ever! You're off to a great start, just keep pushing through. It gets better, so much better. Be sure to give me a shout if you need anything
-Steve
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Congrats on 3 weeks MuleMan! You are kicking ass, and doing the right things by staying active on the forum and getting digits.
Don't get discouraged if you have some up and down days. Quitting nicotine can be like a rollercoaster, especially the first weeks. As BugGuy said it does get so much better.
Proud to quit with you!
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Do you and would you have the ability to help out with the SSOA/ tracking down the missing/ and/or roll flipping duties in your April 2020 quit group? Any help at all is much appreciated and goes along way when it comes to Brotherhood + Accountability. Thanks in advance!
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Congrats @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417) on hitting 3rd floor my friend. Not quite to the ladies underwear but your darn close, lol. 'party' 'chew2'. You deserve it brother.
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Congrats @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417) on hitting 3rd floor my friend. Not quite to the ladies underwear but your darn close, lol. 'party' 'chew2'. You deserve it brother.
Congrats on 300 brother. Keep doing the great work you are doing.
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Congrats @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417) on hitting 3rd floor my friend. Not quite to the ladies underwear but your darn close, lol. 'party' 'chew2'. You deserve it brother.
Congrats on 300 brother. Keep doing the great work you are doing.
Congrats brother. Keep up the good work. Stay strong, stay quit
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Congrats @MuleMan (https://ktcforum.org/index.php?action=profile;u=16417) on hitting 3rd floor my friend. Not quite to the ladies underwear but your darn close, lol. 'party' 'chew2'. You deserve it brother.
Congrats on 300 brother. Keep doing the great work you are doing.
Congrats brother. Keep up the good work. Stay strong, stay quit
omg I saw this late sorry guys - thanks Doug!! PTBQWY all!
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I forgot this thread was out there. Amazing to re read this all. Means so much as I approach my one year anniversary.
'CJ'
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I forgot this thread was out there. Amazing to re read this all. Means so much as I approach my one year anniversary.
'CJ'
Good for you! Well done!