Thanks Cspence. I may take you up on your offer. No concern at the moment that I'll give up
I'm 42 hours into my quit and today was def harder than day 1. I'm silently raging mad at myself all day and having outbursts toward family for minor annoyances. I'm starting to see the haze/fog others have talked about too. I feel like I can resist the cravings; just want the rage and emotions to lift and become more controllable. I have much to accomplish this week outside of my quit (I can see now that's in jeopardy); my quit seems most important to me. not going back, just want this over.
Hi @MuleMan, I am 35 days into my quit. Still learning daily. Rage was my biggest obstacle. The first week was the worst. « Reply #16 on: December 02, 2019, 07:50:38 PM » in Olcpo Introduction "Day one" pages 4-5. This one was the peak, it got better fast after this. I have tried to blog every day, what I felt and what was new. Mostly to remind me of what I went through so I don't go back. I am sharing this spot on the site not so you can read about me, but so you can read the great advice I got from the vets on how they managed the rage and stress.
You are right that your quit is the most important right now. Honesty with my family as to what I was/am feeling and saying I'm sorry a lot. For me, prayer was/is essential. I have to give it to God, I cannot do it myself. Each instance feeling the anger/rage starting, learning what it fees like before I am in it, heading it off before it erupts. Walking away from situations, take a deep breath and a drink of water, pause for a moment, then go back and finish. One Minute At A Time = OMAAT One Second... One DayAAT Whatever it takes.
It does get better. It is a roller coaster. a few good days/hours and then "where did this come from" One hour at a time. I have to focus on the good minutes hours days. Now they really outnumber the bad and pretty much since week 2. Going back is not an option. I haven't called anyone yet. I should and will if for no other reason than to establish communication and Thank them for caring about me and my quit. I have their numbers (digits) programmed in my phone (which I rarely use because it doesn't work well where I live) in case I need to call them. If you want my digits or anything else, PM me and I will be glad to share mine. Your quit is a lot like a Mule, learn to read it like you do a mule.
@olcpo
Thanks olcpo - I read this closely- makes a lot of sense. Glad to hear of your quit and progress. Excited to reach Day 30; feels a long way off. This community has been a real blessing. God Bless you!
MuleMan
You've got this. The nicotine is about gone from your system. Now the games begin. Take it easy on yourself, if you can, choose low/no stress. Drink lots of water, flush the crap out of your system. Staying busy and working hard so I am physically tired really helped me, still is. One of the vets here shared, "You can't control what life or the world brings you, but you can control what you put in your mouth. Chew NEVER fixed anything (problem + chew = 2 problems)."
The days will go by fast as you observe the changes you are going through. The fog will go away. My forehead was tight, almost a headache, for a week. I cut my coffee back to about half for a few weeks. Without the nicotine and all the other crap the caffeine was stronger. I had trouble concentrating, mind seemed scattered, everything seemed intense. The only thing that helped was a change of location and what I was doing. This was the first week and then I noticed when it came on it went away faster, not as often and less intense. Give it time and be patient with yourself. This is a big deal to the body and takes time.
Great choice in quitting, Muleman. We've all experienced the rage while trying to quit. It's difficult to lash out at loved ones and not think that it is worth quitting, and that it's better to keep feeding the beast to keep it tame.
However, you must go thru the rage, the fog, sleeplessness, the suck, anxiety, depression, and the utter misery to free yourself from the chains by which you bound yourself. And by choice you simply unlock the shackles and walk away. Run like hell at times.
It's a bitch of a trail to trod but a well trodden trail nonetheless. We've all been where you are at. Quitting for the rest of your life and dealing with all the aforementioned withdrawal symptoms is too much to handle, so, a couple of tips:
WUPP - that means post a daily promise ASAFP. What better way to start a day than with a renewed commitment to be quit?
ODAAT - that means you don't have to quit for week, month, year at a time. It just means you gotta quit for only one day at a time.
Collect Digits - it's weird at first, but you'll find immense value in the safety net that this botherhood can provide. BROTHERHOOD + ACCOUNTABILITY = SUCCESS.
Rage here, in the forums - not at home or at work. Bring all that here, it's what we are here for, hear?
Finally, Quit for YOU, and for YOU only. This requires you to believe that you can quit. We believe you can, because we believe in ourselves and in our quit commrades.
Again, great choice in quitting, and an even better choice doing it with KTC
BMC 815
