KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: racetrackcowgirl on January 21, 2014, 02:14:00 PM
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Day 293 and the cravings have been considerable harder the last week or so.....just getting back down to the basics and reaching out.
It's been a long time and a lot of drama, misunderstanding and resentments which is why i haven't reached out earlier but this is bigger than me and any risk of having to re-live those days of early and niave thinking have to be faced head on. Besides, those of us involved have all moved on and grown from it.
I have to keep moving forward but damn my feet just feel stuck! 'bang head'
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Day 293 and the cravings have been considerable harder the last week or so.....just getting back down to the basics and reaching out.
It's been a long time and a lot of drama, misunderstanding and resentments which is why i haven't reached out earlier but this is bigger than me and any risk of having to re-live those days of early and niave thinking have to be faced head on. Besides, those of us involved have all moved on and grown from it.
I have to keep moving forward but damn my feet just feel stuck! 'bang head'
We've got your back sis!
Just to hear it again... look at how far you've come. You know going back isn't an option. I'm right beside you... Rock on.
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Day 293 and the cravings have been considerable harder the last week or so.....just getting back down to the basics and reaching out.
It's been a long time and a lot of drama, misunderstanding and resentments which is why i haven't reached out earlier but this is bigger than me and any risk of having to re-live those days of early and niave thinking have to be faced head on. Besides, those of us involved have all moved on and grown from it.
I have to keep moving forward but damn my feet just feel stuck! 'bang head'
send me a PM if you want another number. You know the tools work here, and you've got lots of supporters. Stay the course, keep putting in the work to build your quit for the stage you are in now... Holler if I can help you.
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you can't expect to hit day x and you'll be good. Is today better than day 3? if so today sounds like another victory. Add mine to the list of numbers that is just a pm away.
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I am trailing you by 100 days but you were instrumental in my quit early on, I am here anytime you want to talk. You can do this...you have done it for 293 days so far. You have proven to all that you are a bad ass quitter, stick with it.
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Oh no sis you are not going anywhere keep your head up. (
Now boys and girls this is how this is done feel weak reach out don't just say fuck it and post a day 1) I got a bit derailed there.
send me a PM I am feeling pretty good let me help anyway I can.
Trauma
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Day 293 and the cravings have been considerable harder the last week or so.....just getting back down to the basics and reaching out.
It's been a long time and a lot of drama, misunderstanding and resentments which is why i haven't reached out earlier but this is bigger than me and any risk of having to re-live those days of early and niave thinking have to be faced head on. Besides, those of us involved have all moved on and grown from it.
I have to keep moving forward but damn my feet just feel stuck! 'bang head'
Been there. I fortunately had a lot of help. You are nicer about saying you feel stuck.
I got in fights with the admins, moderators, people at the store. On paper, my life was better, it was suppose to be much better but I didn't feel it.
It wasn't until I read a post that said something like...."I'll tell you whats wrong...You're hurting."
It was true. I had no reason but I hurt. Right about the same days quit as you are. I hurt from 280+ to 300.
You are going from being a quit addict to a recovering addict. You are learning to cope with out your vice. You will desire to kick out all the walls. Stay close and vent here. Go back to being quit today.
It will pass and you will be sooo glad you stayed the course. These are great days for you. You are now recovering from your addiction and not just quitting. That is, if you stay quit.
The hurt will go away. I am speaking from experience.
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Thank you to all. I am so glad i posted again. I ran out and got a can of smokey mountain and between your responses and my phone blowing up I couldn't feel better - especially compared to three hours ago.
I just keep re-reading everything and Mthomas I am hurting and it does suck. I'm so used to smooth sailing that this hit below the belt in my mind.
Push forward. Use my tools, do what i've been taught......Holy shit whoda thunk it - by george it does help!
Thank you to EVERYONE! This really can be done and I will stay one bad ass quitter 'na na'
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Thank you to all. I am so glad i posted again. I ran out and got a can of smokey mountain and between your responses and my phone blowing up I couldn't feel better - especially compared to three hours ago.
I just keep re-reading everything and Mthomas I am hurting and it does suck. I'm so used to smooth sailing that this hit below the belt in my mind.
Push forward. Use my tools, do what i've been taught......Holy shit whoda thunk it - by george it does help!
Thank you to EVERYONE! This really can be done and I will stay one bad ass quitter 'na na'
Way to reach out in a tough spot RTCG. I think we all have those rough patches where just saying fuck it and giving in seems like the answer. Every victory makes us stronger!
Quit with you day sister!
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Thank you to all. I am so glad i posted again. I ran out and got a can of smokey mountain and between your responses and my phone blowing up I couldn't feel better - especially compared to three hours ago.
I just keep re-reading everything and Mthomas I am hurting and it does suck. I'm so used to smooth sailing that this hit below the belt in my mind.
Push forward. Use my tools, do what i've been taught......Holy shit whoda thunk it - by george it does help!
Thank you to EVERYONE! This really can be done and I will stay one bad ass quitter 'na na'
Way to reach out in a tough spot RTCG. I think we all have those rough patches where just saying fuck it and giving in seems like the answer. Every victory makes us stronger!
Quit with you day sister!
I lost all KTC contacts when my phone blew up, but if you still have mine - use it anytime.
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Day 293 and the cravings have been considerable harder the last week or so.....just getting back down to the basics and reaching out.
It's been a long time and a lot of drama, misunderstanding and resentments which is why i haven't reached out earlier but this is bigger than me and any risk of having to re-live those days of early and niave thinking have to be faced head on. Besides, those of us involved have all moved on and grown from it.
I have to keep moving forward but damn my feet just feel stuck! 'bang head'
Nice to hear from you again, and I can relate to the way you feel. 293 days...seems like you should have this thing licked, but you're frustrated that you still struggle. I feel you, but I think you need to take a step back and look big picture.
Stupid analogy...
For the past 293 days you've been engaged in a massive game of tug of war with dipbacotine ( I made that word up, it's a combo of dip, tobacco and nicotine).
You've been tugging on that rope so hard to keep yourself out of that pit of mud that your arms feel like jello, your legs are on fire, you hands are blistered and full of rope burn, and your sick of it. Your sick of trying so hard, but you're afraid of being pulled back into the pit of addiction.
Let go of the rope.
By letting go of the rope you don't "lose", you don't end up in the pit, you just finally realize that you don't have to play tug of war anymore, like you did in the beginning. In the beginning you had to tug that som bitch with all your might just to stay afloat.
It's been 293 days now. You're not cured (none of us are) and you might still have to play some games with dibacotine, but tug of war shouldn't be the game of choice anymore. You're beyond that. You did all the pulling you needed for close to a year now.
Time to take a step back a think about all the things you have learned here and all the good things you have done. Time to let go of all the "heaviness". It's time to quit smarter, not harder.
You are probably thinking "fuck you asshole, I feel like shit" and I get that, but I bet if you realllly think about it, you don't feel nearly as bad as you did in the beginning, and I bet if you think even harder, you know what it will take to get back to feeling good again.
It won't be going back to using brute strength to pull on that beat up and tattered rope, anymore. It will simply take some brain power to figure out how to wiggle those little feet loose and get them UNstuck. You got the tools, so use them. It's a lot easier than playing tug of war.
I know you got this.
Quit on...
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Day 293 and the cravings have been considerable harder the last week or so.....just getting back down to the basics and reaching out.
It's been a long time and a lot of drama, misunderstanding and resentments which is why i haven't reached out earlier but this is bigger than me and any risk of having to re-live those days of early and niave thinking have to be faced head on. Besides, those of us involved have all moved on and grown from it.
I have to keep moving forward but damn my feet just feel stuck! 'bang head'
Nice to hear from you again, and I can relate to the way you feel. 293 days...seems like you should have this thing licked, but you're frustrated that you still struggle. I feel you, but I think you need to take a step back and look big picture.
Stupid analogy...
For the past 293 days you've been engaged in a massive game of tug of war with dipbacotine ( I made that word up, it's a combo of dip, tobacco and nicotine).
You've been tugging on that rope so hard to keep yourself out of that pit of mud that your arms feel like jello, your legs are on fire, you hands are blistered and full of rope burn, and your sick of it. Your sick of trying so hard, but you're afraid of being pulled back into the pit of addiction.
Let go of the rope.
By letting go of the rope you don't "lose", you don't end up in the pit, you just finally realize that you don't have to play tug of war anymore, like you did in the beginning. In the beginning you had to tug that som bitch with all your might just to stay afloat.
It's been 293 days now. You're not cured (none of us are) and you might still have to play some games with dibacotine, but tug of war shouldn't be the game of choice anymore. You're beyond that. You did all the pulling you needed for close to a year now.
Time to take a step back a think about all the things you have learned here and all the good things you have done. Time to let go of all the "heaviness". It's time to quit smarter, not harder.
You are probably thinking "fuck you asshole, I feel like shit" and I get that, but I bet if you realllly think about it, you don't feel nearly as bad as you did in the beginning, and I bet if you think even harder, you know what it will take to get back to feeling good again.
It won't be going back to using brute strength to pull on that beat up and tattered rope, anymore. It will simply take some brain power to figure out how to wiggle those little feet loose and get them UNstuck. You got the tools, so use them. It's a lot easier than playing tug of war.
I know you got this.
Quit on...
Hey old friend! I'm glad to see you. I completely understand. I let that rope go awhile back - it's just like it popped back to kick my ass for a minute. I just needed to go back to my tools like you said!
It worked too! Today I stayed clean and clear of nic and it's all because you all stepped up and helped stand me back up.
Thanks and it's been far too long because i've gotten way too excited to hear (read) from some of you i've missed for so long and haven't seen in chat!
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Day 293 and the cravings have been considerable harder the last week or so.....just getting back down to the basics and reaching out.
It's been a long time and a lot of drama, misunderstanding and resentments which is why i haven't reached out earlier but this is bigger than me and any risk of having to re-live those days of early and niave thinking have to be faced head on. Besides, those of us involved have all moved on and grown from it.
I have to keep moving forward but damn my feet just feel stuck! 'bang head'
Nice to hear from you again, and I can relate to the way you feel. 293 days...seems like you should have this thing licked, but you're frustrated that you still struggle. I feel you, but I think you need to take a step back and look big picture.
Stupid analogy...
For the past 293 days you've been engaged in a massive game of tug of war with dipbacotine ( I made that word up, it's a combo of dip, tobacco and nicotine).
You've been tugging on that rope so hard to keep yourself out of that pit of mud that your arms feel like jello, your legs are on fire, you hands are blistered and full of rope burn, and your sick of it. Your sick of trying so hard, but you're afraid of being pulled back into the pit of addiction.
Let go of the rope.
By letting go of the rope you don't "lose", you don't end up in the pit, you just finally realize that you don't have to play tug of war anymore, like you did in the beginning. In the beginning you had to tug that som bitch with all your might just to stay afloat.
It's been 293 days now. You're not cured (none of us are) and you might still have to play some games with dibacotine, but tug of war shouldn't be the game of choice anymore. You're beyond that. You did all the pulling you needed for close to a year now.
Time to take a step back a think about all the things you have learned here and all the good things you have done. Time to let go of all the "heaviness". It's time to quit smarter, not harder.
You are probably thinking "fuck you asshole, I feel like shit" and I get that, but I bet if you realllly think about it, you don't feel nearly as bad as you did in the beginning, and I bet if you think even harder, you know what it will take to get back to feeling good again.
It won't be going back to using brute strength to pull on that beat up and tattered rope, anymore. It will simply take some brain power to figure out how to wiggle those little feet loose and get them UNstuck. You got the tools, so use them. It's a lot easier than playing tug of war.
I know you got this.
Quit on...
Hey old friend! I'm glad to see you. I completely understand. I let that rope go awhile back - it's just like it popped back to kick my ass for a minute. I just needed to go back to my tools like you said!
It worked too! Today I stayed clean and clear of nic and it's all because you all stepped up and helped stand me back up.
Thanks and it's been far too long because i've gotten way too excited to hear (read) from some of you i've missed for so long and haven't seen in chat!
:D
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I'm very proud of you girl... You've come a long way! Leave the past behind you where it belongs and push forward. You are a bad ass quitter and have a lot to offer any of our brothers and sisters here. I'm here for you if you need me, just a call, text or Facebook message away!
This should cheer you up...
:channing:
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I'm very proud of you girl... You've come a long way! Leave the past behind you where it belongs and push forward. You are a bad ass quitter and have a lot to offer any of our brothers and sisters here. I'm here for you if you need me, just a call, text or Facebook message away!
This should cheer you up...
:channing:
'hit it' ^^^^
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I'm very proud of you girl... You've come a long way! Leave the past behind you where it belongs and push forward. You are a bad ass quitter and have a lot to offer any of our brothers and sisters here. I'm here for you if you need me, just a call, text or Facebook message away!
This should cheer you up...
:channing:
'hit it' ^^^^
Why yes, I will have what Cowgirl is having! Hang in there Cowgirl!
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
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My July sister!
Hitting 300. Awesome.
Can't tell you how proud I am of you. You've dragged yourself through some stuff the last 300 days and fought every step of the way. You've battled for this quit of yours. I'll stand next to you every damn day. Rock on...
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3 bills. Nice work!!!!!
'assman'
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great job sister 300 nice keep up the great work!
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My July sister!
Hitting 300. Awesome.
Can't tell you how proud I am of you. You've dragged yourself through some stuff the last 300 days and fought every step of the way. You've battled for this quit of yours. I'll stand next to you every damn day. Rock on...
What ^^^^ he said. We are all proud of you for making it through the struggles you have had to go through. Most likely you will always have those but your brothers here have your back and will support you through the tough times. Congratulations on the third floor. The penthouse view is awesome!
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Thank you to everyone but you all get a piece of this cake! - I couldn't have done it by myself!
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Thank you to everyone but you all get a piece of this cake! - I couldn't have done it by myself!
Glad you have stuck around. Proud of you.
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Damn, you have had quite a couple weeks. Hit a birthday, have Diesel drop pictures of his dreamboat on here, hit 300 days quit and you are dishing out cake.
Congrats and you were instrumental in my quit early on, so I thank you very much for all you did for me.
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Damn, you have had quite a couple weeks. Hit a birthday, have Diesel drop pictures of his dreamboat on here, hit 300 days quit and you are dishing out cake.
Congrats and you were instrumental in my quit early on, so I thank you very much for all you did for me.
Way to go! You are bad ass!
Keep on quitting like a girl!
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Congrats on one year of freedom, you are awesome.
P
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
its funny cowgirl...when i came back i was curious if you ever did...glad to see you pulled through everything...
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
its funny cowgirl...when i came back i was curious if you ever did...glad to see you pulled through everything...
Thank you to everyone! This has been the best day EVER! The freedom of today is almost sureal! I couldn't have done it without everyone. Here's to tomorrow with each and everyone of you!
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
its funny cowgirl...when i came back i was curious if you ever did...glad to see you pulled through everything...
Thank you to everyone! This has been the best day EVER! The freedom of today is almost sureal! I couldn't have done it without everyone. Here's to tomorrow with each and everyone of you!
'clap'
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
its funny cowgirl...when i came back i was curious if you ever did...glad to see you pulled through everything...
Thank you to everyone! This has been the best day EVER! The freedom of today is almost sureal! I couldn't have done it without everyone. Here's to tomorrow with each and everyone of you!
'clap'
Nice work Cowgirl! Proud of you!
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
its funny cowgirl...when i came back i was curious if you ever did...glad to see you pulled through everything...
Thank you to everyone! This has been the best day EVER! The freedom of today is almost sureal! I couldn't have done it without everyone. Here's to tomorrow with each and everyone of you!
'clap'
Nice work Cowgirl! Proud of you!
Congrats RTCG
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
its funny cowgirl...when i came back i was curious if you ever did...glad to see you pulled through everything...
Thank you to everyone! This has been the best day EVER! The freedom of today is almost sureal! I couldn't have done it without everyone. Here's to tomorrow with each and everyone of you!
'clap'
Nice work Cowgirl! Proud of you!
Congrats RTCG
Not too shabby for a cowgirl. Seriously, job well done. You ROCK!!!!
'wave' 'wave' 'wave' 'wave' 'wave'
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Bump for awesomeness!
1 year.
How does that feel? Take a moment to soak it up and just... Enjoy it! Be proud.
You've come through some gnarly stuff this last year. You left KTC... You came back to KTC. Life and health have kicked you around a bit. Through it all you stayed quit... You held on to it. That... Is badass sis! Super proud of you and thankful you're here. You lend a li'l class to our group of cavemen ;)
Congratulations on your year!
Nice job Cowgirl, it's been an exciting year to say the least. I know of some of the struggles you've had to overcome but you are now better because of it, your quit is solid because of the struggles. Carry on and forward. You're safety net is always here with the boys of Junk Free July. Proud to be quit with you today 'oh yeah'
Strong work CowGirl....AJ took all the kewl stuff to say so I am gonna have to wing it. I am glad you are back in the trench with us EDD you are an example of how being quit don't take a break...you left KTC found a new place to stay accountable and now you are back HOME where you belong...QLF w you
its funny cowgirl...when i came back i was curious if you ever did...glad to see you pulled through everything...
Thank you to everyone! This has been the best day EVER! The freedom of today is almost sureal! I couldn't have done it without everyone. Here's to tomorrow with each and everyone of you!
'clap'
Nice work Cowgirl! Proud of you!
Congrats RTCG
Not too shabby for a cowgirl. Seriously, job well done. You ROCK!!!!
'wave' 'wave' 'wave' 'wave' 'wave'
Congratulations! You're a beautiful soul and I'm glad to know you. :)
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400
Pretty badass sis!
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400
Pretty badass sis!
Congrats on the 4th floor, ma'am.
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400
Pretty badass sis!
Congrats on the 4th floor, ma'am.
Saweeeeet
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400
Pretty badass sis!
Congrats on the 4th floor, ma'am.
Saweeeeet
Most awesome! Congrats!
-
400
Pretty badass sis!
Congrats on the 4th floor, ma'am.
Saweeeeet
Most awesome! Congrats!
Great work racking up 400 days quit and not letting "life happen" get in the way of your quit.
-
Nice chatting with you yesterday, and gratz on the 4 hundo!
-
Nice chatting with you yesterday, and gratz on the 4 hundo!
Well done, my friend! You have really kicked some serious ass! Proud to have you in my corner!!
-
Thank you to everyone out there - couldn't have done it without y'all....FYI - The view is AMAZING!
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Nice chatting with you yesterday, and gratz on the 4 hundo!
Well done, my friend! You have really kicked some serious ass! Proud to have you in my corner!!
What he said ^^^^ Proud of you. No leaving you behind and don't you leave any of us behind.
-
Nice chatting with you yesterday, and gratz on the 4 hundo!
Well done, my friend! You have really kicked some serious ass! Proud to have you in my corner!!
What he said ^^^^ Proud of you. No leaving you behind and don't you leave any of us behind.
Congrats. Well done.
-
Nice chatting with you yesterday, and gratz on the 4 hundo!
Well done, my friend! You have really kicked some serious ass! Proud to have you in my corner!!
What he said ^^^^ Proud of you. No leaving you behind and don't you leave any of us behind.
Congrats. Well done.
Nice quadzilla. You're bad ass!!!
-
Bumpin' my July sister for some half comma recognition!
Super proud of you girl. Rock on...!
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Nice 400, congrats on being a complete badass quitter.
-
500 does feel great! Better get over my fear of heights! Thanks to all of my brothers and sisters here - this shit works and the proof is in the numbers!
-
500 does feel great! Better get over my fear of heights! Thanks to all of my brothers and sisters here - this shit works and the proof is in the numbers!
Now that's badass! Congrats on hitting five hundo.
-
500 does feel great! Better get over my fear of heights! Thanks to all of my brothers and sisters here - this shit works and the proof is in the numbers!
Now that's badass! Congrats on hitting five hundo.
Congrats on 5 hundo.
Keep up the bad-assery!!!!
-
500 does feel great! Better get over my fear of heights! Thanks to all of my brothers and sisters here - this shit works and the proof is in the numbers!
Now that's badass! Congrats on hitting five hundo.
Congrats on 5 hundo.
Keep up the bad-assery!!!!
Belated congrats, Cowgirl!
500 is bad ass!
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500 does feel great! Better get over my fear of heights! Thanks to all of my brothers and sisters here - this shit works and the proof is in the numbers!
Now that's badass! Congrats on hitting five hundo.
Congrats on 5 hundo.
Keep up the bad-assery!!!!
Belated congrats, Cowgirl!
500 is bad ass!
Late for this party! Congrats Cowgirl. You've come a long way in your quit. You seem so much more smarter than you were 500 days ago. I'm discovering a trend, must be that our brains really do repair themselves. Huh?!
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500 does feel great! Better get over my fear of heights! Thanks to all of my brothers and sisters here - this shit works and the proof is in the numbers!
Now that's badass! Congrats on hitting five hundo.
Congrats on 5 hundo.
Keep up the bad-assery!!!!
Belated congrats, Cowgirl!
500 is bad ass!
Late for this party! Congrats Cowgirl. You've come a long way in your quit. You seem so much more smarter than you were 500 days ago. I'm discovering a trend, must be that our brains really do repair themselves. Huh?!
I remember how you fought through the drama and kept the quit... Congrates on half a comma sister!
-
500 does feel great! Better get over my fear of heights! Thanks to all of my brothers and sisters here - this shit works and the proof is in the numbers!
Now that's badass! Congrats on hitting five hundo.
Congrats on 5 hundo.
Keep up the bad-assery!!!!
Belated congrats, Cowgirl!
500 is bad ass!
Late for this party! Congrats Cowgirl. You've come a long way in your quit. You seem so much more smarter than you were 500 days ago. I'm discovering a trend, must be that our brains really do repair themselves. Huh?!
I remember how you fought through the drama and kept the quit... Congrates on half a comma sister!
Fantastic Cowgirl. You remain bad ass! Quit on sister! You inspire me!
-
It would have been 5 years today. Now it's only day 2. Don't let your guard down no matter how much time has gone by. I fell complacent and no I'm paying the ultimate price. I've answered to my new group, answered to my old group and now back on my knees to start over.
This is not defeat, this is a set back. One dip. That was it. But it was enough for me to come back and retake my Accountability 201 class.
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It would have been 5 years today. Now it's only day 2. Don't let your guard down no matter how much time has gone by. I fell complacent and now I'm paying the ultimate price. I've answered to my new group, answered to my old group and now back on my knees to start over.
This is not defeat, this is a set back. One dip. That was it. But it was enough for me to come back and retake my Accountability 201 class.
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Welcome back in the saddle Cowgirl.
Hate the reason but.......
Respect you posting in July!
They will need you and your experience.
You helped my quit today.
Never just one!
I quit with you today.
Rawls 1234....
-
Sort.
Your.
Fucking.
Life.
I want you to read Trauma’s intro. Remember him? He was a July ‘13 brother to you like me, Fleas, and Quit.
This shit killed Todd.
You read me?..... killed him.
Yet... he bedded in his integrity and didnÂ’t put himself in the position to offer up excuses. He remained Quit to the end and won over this evil addiction in a fashion most of us will never know.
Excuses are boring.
Yours in particular are so blasé that they’re even more boring.
Drugs/meds/bad place/ mental this-n-that... blah blah blah.
Boring.
In the last 5 years IÂ’ve dealt with the death of family, major illness of a parent, scary financial issues, losing a job, gigantic emergency house repairs, auto accidents, shitty people, asshole bosses, my jaw practically being rebuilt... life sister. Life.
Not. Fucking. Once... did I EVER consider grabbing a can.
Not. Once.
I owned this from the start because if I hadnÂ’t... IÂ’d be dead.
Maybe not yet but this shit wouldÂ’ve killed me to eventually.
Excuses are boring. Stop wrapping yourself in yours.
Sort.
Your.
Fucking.
Life.
IÂ’m not going to welcome you back.
Sorry.
I don’t have it in me to be a “get back on that horse!!” kinda guy.
Now that youÂ’re here...
I think the expectation from you is posting in your new AND old group EVERY day.
Get involved and STAY involved. You stopped posting roll and stepped away from accountability... look what happened.
Posting roll works... do it.
Own it.
No excuses.
-
Sort.
Your.
Fucking.
Life.
I want you to read Trauma’s intro. Remember him? He was a July ‘13 brother to you like me, Fleas, and Quit.
This shit killed Todd.
You read me?..... killed him.
Yet... he bedded in his integrity and didnÂ’t put himself in the position to offer up excuses. He remained Quit to the end and won over this evil addiction in a fashion most of us will never know.
Excuses are boring.
Yours in particular are so blasé that they’re even more boring.
Drugs/meds/bad place/ mental this-n-that... blah blah blah.
Boring.
In the last 5 years IÂ’ve dealt with the death of family, major illness of a parent, scary financial issues, losing a job, gigantic emergency house repairs, auto accidents, shitty people, asshole bosses, my jaw practically being rebuilt... life sister. Life.
Not. Fucking. Once... did I EVER consider grabbing a can.
Not. Once.
I owned this from the start because if I hadnÂ’t... IÂ’d be dead.
Maybe not yet but this shit wouldÂ’ve killed me to eventually.
Excuses are boring. Stop wrapping yourself in yours.
Sort.
Your.
Fucking.
Life.
IÂ’m not going to welcome you back.
Sorry.
I don’t have it in me to be a “get back on that horse!!” kinda guy.
Now that youÂ’re here...
I think the expectation from you is posting in your new AND old group EVERY day.
Get involved and STAY involved. You stopped posting roll and stepped away from accountability... look what happened.
Posting roll works... do it.
Own it.
No excuses.
I'll add a bit to Apple's post.
Quit. Save the drama for elsewhere. Quit.
Give help. Get help. Don't fight with everyone on this site. You've done it before. Don't do it again. It clearly didn't work last time.
Shane laid out a plan of success. I'd listen.
-
Welcome back!
Glad you came to your senses so quickly, but it does suck that you caved. However, I do appreciate you coming back and sharing your story. It honestly helps me stay quit. If I never saw anyone coming back after they left I would think "Hell, no one comes back saying they caved after they left, they must be doing just fine". But I see just the opposite and it helps me keep coming back every day.
-
No roll post yet...
Why doesnÂ’t that surprise me?
-
I see you checking in but not posting roll...
If youÂ’re serious about saving your life stop hiding... take your lumps and get in here and do this.
-
Woulda shoulda coulda been 5 years, but waaaaaaah, waaaaaaah, waaaaaaaah. I just followed the system that is place and did 4 years a couple of days ago. Doesn't seem that hard to me.
-
It's me Cowgirl. Unfortunately, I am back at day 1 again. I was 1 month shy of 5 years when I lost control. I let my guard down, got complacent in my roll calls and caved. I wasn't prepared even all those years later and because of that I failed. I came back on and confessed to my quit group. They of course put me on the chopping block and I had to answer up for my actions with my tail between my legs. That was a year ago. I didn't hold on for long but now I am just sick and tired of everything and ready to quit again. I know exactly what I have to do. I need numbers, I need support, and most of all I need to use the tools I learned so many years ago.
It's time for me to be accountable and I am ready to get this addiction off my back.
Brothers and sisters I come to you for help.
Cowgirl
-
Please disregard this thread. I am having it taken down. I will post on my original thread once it has been taken care of.
My apologies.
-
Merging topics so it'll continue along the path of the original...
Welcome back. You owe some answers to your new group as well as the previous:
1) What happened
2) Why did it happen
3) What are you going to do to keep it from happening again
-
Merging topics so it'll continue along the path of the original...
Welcome back. You owe some answers to your new group as well as the previous:
1) What happened - I let my guard down because I got complacent and picked it back up. Once was all it took for her to get her claws back in me.
2) Why did it happen - No excuses. I didn't do what worked, I chose to pick it back up and it cost me my time, my integrity, and my humility.
3) What are you going to do to keep it from happening again Start over at day 1. Remember all those tools I took advantage of in my beginning quit, get more numbers, reach out when I need to (and even when I don't), post roll everyday, and stick to what I know works regardless of what I think or how out of control I may feel. - Certainly not play pity party on my actions.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
^^^
That was a waaaaay better response. That was honest.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Pm'ed digits
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
^^^
That was a waaaaay better response. That was honest.
Yet this entire conversation is taking place outside the group it belongs in.
Why in your intro? Why not in your group? Why not in July '18? Why not in the group before that (I apologize for not knowing specifically which)?
I see you asking for help here, but not from your group. Maybe I need to get back into August and read a little more, but even with all my crap going on I've been trying to follow along in there.
Addiction is, by its very nature, a selfish act. Quitting is too though.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
^^^
That was a waaaaay better response. That was honest.
Yet this entire conversation is taking place outside the group it belongs in.
Why in your intro? Why not in your group? Why not in July '18? Why not in the group before that (I apologize for not knowing specifically which)?
I see you asking for help here, but not from your group. Maybe I need to get back into August and read a little more, but even with all my crap going on I've been trying to follow along in there.
Addiction is, by its very nature, a selfish act. Quitting is too though.
The intros used to be/still are a perfectly valid place for this conversation to happen.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
^^^
That was a waaaaay better response. That was honest.
Yet this entire conversation is taking place outside the group it belongs in.
Why in your intro? Why not in your group? Why not in July '18? Why not in the group before that (I apologize for not knowing specifically which)?
I see you asking for help here, but not from your group. Maybe I need to get back into August and read a little more, but even with all my crap going on I've been trying to follow along in there.
Addiction is, by its very nature, a selfish act. Quitting is too though.
The intros used to be/still are a perfectly valid place for this conversation to happen.
Maybe, but she's ignoring at least two groups that are asking for answers - the one she's trying to join as well as the last one she left hanging.
Seems to me it's looking like one more group is going to get left behind and nothing has changed...
Remember the good old days when this site used to be about receiving and providing accountability? Things like "Brotherhood + Accountability = Success" actually had meaning...
Good times...
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
^^^
That was a waaaaay better response. That was honest.
Yet this entire conversation is taking place outside the group it belongs in.
Why in your intro? Why not in your group? Why not in July '18? Why not in the group before that (I apologize for not knowing specifically which)?
I see you asking for help here, but not from your group. Maybe I need to get back into August and read a little more, but even with all my crap going on I've been trying to follow along in there.
Addiction is, by its very nature, a selfish act. Quitting is too though.
The intros used to be/still are a perfectly valid place for this conversation to happen.
Maybe, but she's ignoring at least two groups that are asking for answers - the one she's trying to join as well as the last one she left hanging.
Seems to me it's looking like one more group is going to get left behind and nothing has changed...
Remember the good old days when this site used to be about receiving and providing accountability? Things like "Brotherhood + Accountability = Success" actually had meaning...
Good times...
One of the great things about the intros is... they never go away. This conversation is always going to be here, linked to this quitter, and in the event that this is the successful attempt at quitting (unlike the past ones) she can look back at this and see the progress, and the thought process, that went into her first days here. If the prior entries in her threat were buried in a vortex in one of the new groups, this thought process would be lost.
Personally, I absolutely love the intros section and am glad to see people using them to hash this shit out. I'm moving the needle more to the middle on this one, by the way... as the thought process documented is beginning to impress. Lots more to do, but there is hope fo sho.
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
^^^
That was a waaaaay better response. That was honest.
Yet this entire conversation is taking place outside the group it belongs in.
Why in your intro? Why not in your group? Why not in July '18? Why not in the group before that (I apologize for not knowing specifically which)?
I see you asking for help here, but not from your group. Maybe I need to get back into August and read a little more, but even with all my crap going on I've been trying to follow along in there.
Addiction is, by its very nature, a selfish act. Quitting is too though.
The intros used to be/still are a perfectly valid place for this conversation to happen.
Maybe, but she's ignoring at least two groups that are asking for answers - the one she's trying to join as well as the last one she left hanging.
Seems to me it's looking like one more group is going to get left behind and nothing has changed...
Remember the good old days when this site used to be about receiving and providing accountability? Things like "Brotherhood + Accountability = Success" actually had meaning...
Good times...
One of the great things about the intros is... they never go away. This conversation is always going to be here, linked to this quitter, and in the event that this is the successful attempt at quitting (unlike the past ones) she can look back at this and see the progress, and the thought process, that went into her first days here. If the prior entries in her threat were buried in a vortex in one of the new groups, this thought process would be lost.
Personally, I absolutely love the intros section and am glad to see people using them to hash this shit out. I'm moving the needle more to the middle on this one, by the way... as the thought process documented is beginning to impress. Lots more to do, but there is hope fo sho.
I guess it’s nice that she’s in here hashing shit out with her old group members from years ago... but what good is that doing August 2019?
Those newbies don’t know enough about the site to come into the intro section and see any of this.. they’re over there... in the August section. They need guidance. They need to see this stuff to know that nobody is invincible and they are only one stupid decision away from posting a day 1.
Maybe they’ll stumble upon it eventually though, hopefully...
-
BTW, looking for brothers and sisters to get numbers from and to support me in my roll call. Accountability can go both ways too!
Soooo...
Round 3 at this point.Gonna give it another try? Hoping it sticks this time?
You’ll pardon my lack of faith in you or enthusiasm at your return... again.
This will sound mean but I don’t really care.
You NEED to get your shit together.
You’re on day 2 today... I hit day 2,226 today. You SHOULD be ahead of me but life has derailed you... twice... since we started together back in April 2013.
What’s different now?
Life probably has more ups and downs in store for you... you’ll be tempted to cave AGAIN.
What’s different now?
I'm just sick and tired. I'm back mentally where I started my first time around. I'm ready to put it down. I want my health over my addiction. When I was at this point my first time, I held steady thru the best and the worst while I worked the program. It wasn't until I drifted and went solo that I lost my resolve.
I want his more now than ever before especially since I know it can be done.
I'm really curious to know how it felt when you decided to start feeding your addiction again. Did you think of your brothers and sisters here at all, or was it all a selfish only move on your part? Did you completely forget about Shane, about Todd (rest in peace bro) who managed to stay nicotine free all the way to his last breath? It would really be great to understand the mindset of a caver, both to help me, but mostly to help you. Cause right now, like Shane, I'm not feeling it.
“I’m back mentally where I started my first time around”
I hope that’s not your benchmark because, in case it’s escaped you, that obviously wasn’t a successful mindset the first time you tried.
What’s. Different. Now?
It was all selfish. All of my addictions are. Had I thought of anyone else I wouldn't be here. My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip. I took the groups and my time out of the equation. I own that. There is no excuse and I deserve all the reservations from you and everyone else. I wouldn't believe someone else in my shoes. I believe I can but it's just for today. Tomorrow I'll do the same thing. I am scared. I am humiliated. The long run seems so daunting and I'd be lying if I said all my enthusiasm is genuine. All I can do is let yours and everyone else's judgement (justifiable) and help it push me to prove you wrong. I am here. I am ready to ask for help and I am now ready to face the criticism. It's not hate like I assumed last time but genuine care to push me.
This may not be the best way to put it out there but all I can say is please doubt me. That will make me work that much harder. I don't deserve to come jack to smiles and roses. I broke a very longstanding trust to those before and after me and I can only win that back one day at a time. All I ask is to help me do that.
^^^
That was a waaaaay better response. That was honest.
Yet this entire conversation is taking place outside the group it belongs in.
Why in your intro? Why not in your group? Why not in July '18? Why not in the group before that (I apologize for not knowing specifically which)?
I see you asking for help here, but not from your group. Maybe I need to get back into August and read a little more, but even with all my crap going on I've been trying to follow along in there.
Addiction is, by its very nature, a selfish act. Quitting is too though.
The intros used to be/still are a perfectly valid place for this conversation to happen.
Maybe, but she's ignoring at least two groups that are asking for answers - the one she's trying to join as well as the last one she left hanging.
Seems to me it's looking like one more group is going to get left behind and nothing has changed...
Remember the good old days when this site used to be about receiving and providing accountability? Things like "Brotherhood + Accountability = Success" actually had meaning...
Good times...
One of the great things about the intros is... they never go away. This conversation is always going to be here, linked to this quitter, and in the event that this is the successful attempt at quitting (unlike the past ones) she can look back at this and see the progress, and the thought process, that went into her first days here. If the prior entries in her threat were buried in a vortex in one of the new groups, this thought process would be lost.
Personally, I absolutely love the intros section and am glad to see people using them to hash this shit out. I'm moving the needle more to the middle on this one, by the way... as the thought process documented is beginning to impress. Lots more to do, but there is hope fo sho.
I guess it’s nice that she’s in here hashing shit out with her old group members from years ago... but what good is that doing August 2019?
Those newbies don’t know enough about the site to come into the intro section and see any of this.. they’re over there... in the August section. They need guidance. They need to see this stuff to know that nobody is invincible and they are only one stupid decision away from posting a day 1.
Maybe they’ll stumble upon it eventually though, hopefully...
Different strokes for different folks.
The main thing is that the conversation and thought process is happening, and quite frankly this thought process needs to happen with this quitter... so it is encouraging to see it happening somewhere. She owes Shane and his group some answers, and that wouldn't have happened in August 2019.
I commend her for having the fortitude to own up to it somewhere instead of hiding under a rock and ignoring the conversation, like is some common among returning cavers these days. Hopefully the new quitters of August 2019 are stumbling to the intros once in a while, as if they are stuck in August 2019/GroupMe and not reading the posts on here frequently (and writing their own), they are missing a whole lot of KTC. Just my 2 cents, for what it is worth.
-
My mindset was I just didn't have one. All I cared about was that dip.
I can't read minds, so I won't even try. Let me suggest that you adopt a mindset of freedom.
Freedom from nicotine.
Freedom from abuse.
Freedom from ridicule.
Freedom from the past.
You are not quitting nicotine. You are fighting for your freedom from the grasp with which nicotine holds you.
Let go of the past. It doesn't exist. It's only in your memory. Don't let it bind you.
-
Accountability 201. What a crock of shit name for your introduction when your don't even have enough Integrity to explain yourself to your "NEW" group more less your old one.
You are ducking any kind of accountability. I am wondering if you really know what it means.
I would call you a little pink panty wearing bitch like the rest of the weak ass cavers around here but you prolly wear boxers...…
Show some damn Character and Integrity fer fuk sake.
-
Goodmorning Cowgirl, and WELCOME back. No matter how many times u fail and come back, u are always welcome to me, as long as u r nic free. Im sure u get a lot of attention just because u are female. There is alot of rage on this site and lost souls striking out with desperate cries for help. U wanna talk? No judgement, no explanations needed. For me its enough u r here now. U dont haveto like everyone herein, just respect the quit. Pm me for my number if you want. Welcome back and stay strong. This quit is yours sis. U can do it.
-
Goodmorning Cowgirl, and WELCOME back. No matter how many times u fail and come back, u are always welcome to me, as long as u r nic free. Im sure u get a lot of attention just because u are female. There is alot of rage on this site and lost souls striking out with desperate cries for help. U wanna talk? No judgement, no explanations needed. For me its enough u r here now. U dont haveto like everyone herein, just respect the quit. Pm me for my number if you want. Welcome back and stay strong. This quit is yours sis. U can do it.
Any and all numbers are a necessity. Thanks for you support! I need all the help I can get.
-
Goodmorning Cowgirl, and WELCOME back. No matter how many times u fail and come back, u are always welcome to me, as long as u r nic free. Im sure u get a lot of attention just because u are female. There is alot of rage on this site and lost souls striking out with desperate cries for help. U wanna talk? No judgement, no explanations needed. For me its enough u r here now. U dont haveto like everyone herein, just respect the quit. Pm me for my number if you want. Welcome back and stay strong. This quit is yours sis. U can do it.
Any and all numbers are a necessity. Thanks for you support! I need all the help I can get.
So despite SM's nice welcome back, you know the drill, and you need to accept the fact that failure is really not an option here. And despite SM's idea that we treat women differently here, we do not. You are an addict, just like my wife, who is also a member of this site and has been Quit for 7+ years. I see you taking heat in August 2019. Did you expect anything else?
Own your failures and learn from them. But don't expect that anyone is going to have a lot of trust in you right off the bat. You broke your word and left your brothers and sisters behind. That's not how this works. So if this is really just another "attempt" or you are "trying harder" this time, forget it and go somewhere else. Do or do not. There is no try.
-
Goodmorning Cowgirl, and WELCOME back. No matter how many times u fail and come back, u are always welcome to me, as long as u r nic free. Im sure u get a lot of attention just because u are female. There is alot of rage on this site and lost souls striking out with desperate cries for help. U wanna talk? No judgement, no explanations needed. For me its enough u r here now. U dont haveto like everyone herein, just respect the quit. Pm me for my number if you want. Welcome back and stay strong. This quit is yours sis. U can do it.
Any and all numbers are a necessity. Thanks for you support! I need all the help I can get.
So despite SM's nice welcome back, you know the drill, and you need to accept the fact that failure is really not an option here. And despite SM's idea that we treat women differently here, we do not. You are an addict, just like my wife, who is also a member of this site and has been Quit for 7+ years. I see you taking heat in August 2019. Did you expect anything else?
Own your failures and learn from them. But don't expect that anyone is going to have a lot of trust in you right off the bat. You broke your word and left your brothers and sisters behind. That's not how this works. So if this is really just another "attempt" or you are "trying harder" this time, forget it and go somewhere else. Do or do not. There is no try.
^^^This^^^
-
Its funny to me u guys cant keep my name off your lips. U lookin for a new boyfriend? "It is an unfortunately a fact of life that our female quitters are more at risk for harassment." Trust in sharing #7.
-
Its funny to me u guys cant keep my name off your lips. U lookin for a new boyfriend? "It is an unfortunately a fact of life that our female quitters are more at risk for harassment." Trust in sharing #7.
Horseshit you fuckin ding dong.
No one here is different than the other; Male, female, green, blue, purple people eater.
All get treated the same and none are equal in nothing but quit.
Just shows how ignorant you really are.
If you want to discuss this further we will move it to your intro as to not hijack cowgirls.
-
I put this out in general discussion but I don't see why it can't go here too.
I noticed Jake's chew has a new pouch out "infused" with CBD oil. Anyone had any experience with it for addiction?
-
I put this out in general discussion but I don't see why it can't go here too.
I noticed Jake's chew has a new pouch out "infused" with CBD oil. Anyone had any experience with it for addiction?
Haven't used the infused pouches, but have used CBD. It works great to relieve anxiety and does help cut down craves IMO.
-
I put this out in general discussion but I don't see why it can't go here too.
I noticed Jake's chew has a new pouch out "infused" with CBD oil. Anyone had any experience with it for addiction?
Haven't used the infused pouches, but have used CBD. It works great to relieve anxiety and does help cut down craves IMO.
CBD can have good results.