From the looks of most of the stories on here most of you have been burdened with this addiction longer than I have. Being 22 years old and in my first year of graduate school I know I want to stop this habbit before I lose complete control of it. It has slowly been getting out of control as I played baseball in college over the past four years and now that it is over I have no "excuse" to keep doing it. I lost my older brother to cancer when I was 15 and I never want to put myself through what he had to endure, and I damn sure dont want to put my family through anymore stress with that word than they have already had to experience. I know it is going to be a long road, but I like that fact that I have to hold myself accountable on here and commit to a promise.
Above was my introduction to this site in 2011. Since then I have graduated from a doctoral program, gotten engaged, married, moved 3 times. All of those milestones and events in my life served as a plan to quit date after I failed so miserably on here. None of them came to fruition. I have had conversations with friends, family and my wife about my continued problem with tobacco but nothing has changed. The addiction got worse than I ever thought I would let it. It has controlled my day to day life over the past 5+ years and I am ashamed of that. That changes now. I had my last dip on the morning of Saturday Dec. 29th 2019. Yes I am a Retread, Yes I caved back in 2011.
What happened?
Why did it happen?
What are you going to do differently this time?
I addressed these in the first day posting roll call but I will post them again and hopefully satisfy any other members who may think less of my quit because I said I would WUPP 8 years ago and failed.
What Happened?
I've got no excuses. I was a pussy. I let my brain and its addiction to nicotine try to kill me. I stopped posting roll after day 4. Trying to think back to 8 years ago I probably thought "I'm good." How dumb is that? Four days in and I thought I had it handled. I also think I downplayed my own addiction because at the time it was a much smaller problem. I know now that in order for me to quit for good I need to treat the following as fact. This is a serious addiction that will kill me.
Why did it happen?
A 22 year old's pride and stupidity. I couldn't admit to myself that I needed to be on this site every day. I couldn't look myself in the mirror and admit that I REALLY had a problem at all. And if I did, I thought I could certainly solve it myself since I've seen other friends quit chew and cigarettes cold turkey without any outside help. This also turned out to be false.
What are you going to do differently this time?
WUPP. EDD. I will be on this site every morning posting roll call. I will use the support of all of you going through the same addiction that I have. I acknowledge and understand that I have an addiction to nicotine that I cannot solve on my own. I have already given out my number to a few members, and received some from other vets and I will use them.
Never Again, For Any Reason
One Day At A Time
-Rez