Author Topic: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II  (Read 7455 times)

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Offline per034

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #77 on: November 16, 2011, 09:56:00 PM »
Been gone a while. Who am I to say shit. But the subject line for this intro had me hopeful. "Help." That says it all doesn't it? I thought it would be some noob trying to figure out the path. But no - it's a vet. When I read "A lot has happened since I started again..." frankly, I stopped reading.

A lot has happened since I quit. A lot happened before I quit, too. A lot's gonna happen for the rest of my life. There's no excuse for failure. Don't make excuses. Understand where you weakness came from and address it. It's not because "a lot has happened" - it's because you thought you had it licked. You thought you could handle one can without worrying about it. Your weakness was your overconfidence. I think you knew you were going to cave even while you were committing to your quit through roll.

What's different this time? Indeed. What will be different? You never broke your word. You just stopped posting - which makes it easier. You need to man up and see your quit through to the end. And the end is when you die - hopefully at a ripe old age. This isn't a parlor trick. There's no "100 days and I'm free" routine. You're in, then you're in all the way.

But who the fuck and I to say anything. Just another addict with an opinion. I hope your quit holds this time Benny. I'm with Klark on this one though. Why should we believe in you?
The love you get here is conditional. The condition is that you are quit.

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Offline Ready

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #76 on: November 16, 2011, 07:01:00 PM »
You must want this more than anything else in your life right now.

Period.

What are you willing to do to stay quit?

There is only one correct answer and I don't thing you know what that is.

Offline klark

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #75 on: November 16, 2011, 02:35:00 PM »
Quote from: Miles
Quote from: Syndrome
Quote from: bennythekid
when can I post day one?
i sugjest when you got rid a all your nic and your reddy to keep your word for the day. if thats today then go for it. im not gonna rip you a new one here. i save that for fuckwads what post up roll then cave. theres plenty a other guys what mite want a peace a you. like your old quit groop.

i just wanna point out to all the noobs a round here this is classic fail 101. you get all comfy in your quit and drift off forgetin bout postin up roll. i garrenty if you post up roll evry day and keep your word you will be quit. if you dont... well results may very.
Fucking A.

Syndrome has a way with misspelled words.

Write that shit down somewhere.

Post roll every day.

Never forget what you are...an addict.

It's up to you Benny.
Wow Benny, more hope and no results et. Please explain why anyone should take you seriously? How do you plan on proving yourself, hoping or I guess cold turkey is the only way? Do you even want to quit?
A promise not kept is the road to exile.

If quitting is cool, consider me Myles Davis.

Unless you bring value onto my 1/2 acre, I don't want to hear it.

Offline miles

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #74 on: November 16, 2011, 02:23:00 PM »
Quote from: Syndrome
Quote from: bennythekid
when can I post day one?
i sugjest when you got rid a all your nic and your reddy to keep your word for the day. if thats today then go for it. im not gonna rip you a new one here. i save that for fuckwads what post up roll then cave. theres plenty a other guys what mite want a peace a you. like your old quit groop.

i just wanna point out to all the noobs a round here this is classic fail 101. you get all comfy in your quit and drift off forgetin bout postin up roll. i garrenty if you post up roll evry day and keep your word you will be quit. if you dont... well results may very.
Fucking A.

Syndrome has a way with misspelled words.

Write that shit down somewhere.

Post roll every day.

Never forget what you are...an addict.

It's up to you Benny.
I quit with with you all!

Offline Scowick65

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #73 on: November 16, 2011, 09:15:00 AM »
Quote from: Syndrome
Quote from: bennythekid
when can I post day one?
i sugjest when you got rid a all your nic and your reddy to keep your word for the day. if thats today then go for it. im not gonna rip you a new one here. i save that for fuckwads what post up roll then cave. theres plenty a other guys what mite want a peace a you. like your old quit groop.

i just wanna point out to all the noobs a round here this is classic fail 101. you get all comfy in your quit and drift off forgetin bout postin up roll. i garrenty if you post up roll evry day and keep your word you will be quit. if you dont... well results may very.
Post a day 1 in Feb 2012. Explain why you are there. Post day 1 in your old group. Explain.

You then need to post every day after. You can do this. Quit 1 day at a time. You have my help if you need it.

"Cavers find a way to cave, quitters find a way to quit" ~ 30

Offline syndrome

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #72 on: November 16, 2011, 06:49:00 AM »
Quote from: bennythekid
when can I post day one?
i sugjest when you got rid a all your nic and your reddy to keep your word for the day. if thats today then go for it. im not gonna rip you a new one here. i save that for fuckwads what post up roll then cave. theres plenty a other guys what mite want a peace a you. like your old quit groop.

i just wanna point out to all the noobs a round here this is classic fail 101. you get all comfy in your quit and drift off forgetin bout postin up roll. i garrenty if you post up roll evry day and keep your word you will be quit. if you dont... well results may very.
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Offline bennythekid

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #71 on: November 16, 2011, 03:09:00 AM »
where should I post this at?

The reason I fucked up is because I quit for me but didn't keep that conviction. over time that conviction to quit was more for others and for my image. that didn't last very long and when it came down to the breakdown that started me back up on it I didn't hold myself accountable.

I quit counting my days and I quit posting roll and it was a matter of time before I quit caring about all of the progress I had made.

A lot has happened since I started again. Last year this time my band split and i was in college for the first time in six years. I got a job as a tattoo apprentice in april and its a very stressful job in many ways. I have half tried quitting several times only to allow the stress and jokes that come with the territory of being an apprentice to overcome and cause my anxiety from the quit to get the best of me.

My plan at this time is to continue looking at each day as a short term goal and I want to use the roll call every day because it really was one of the few things that helped.

cold turkey is a hard thing to do for me, but I know it is the only way that actually works.

I hope I can get the forgiveness of those I let down here. I know I can do this, and at this point there is nothing that has driven me to this decision except myself.

when I was sitting thinking about this a few weeks ago I had resigned the voice inside reasoning with me to the backburner because I didn't believe I could face the withdrawal, but I know I need to do this once and for all so that its not something I have to drag on into my career or my future private life.

thanks for the kindness, I expected something else, and by all means deserve it. when can I post day one?

Ben

Offline Mr Nice Guy

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #70 on: November 16, 2011, 02:59:00 AM »
Ay man good choice. We will have you in our feb '12 group. You gotta come clean with everyone though.

Post why you fucked up

and what you will do different

And keep your promise next time

You already know the drill.

Offline bennythekid

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #69 on: November 16, 2011, 02:01:00 AM »
I have not logged into this site for a few seasons now. I failed myself and I find myself desperately addicted to the point where I gave up even trying to quit tobacco for a while.

there is no excuse only a complete feeling of failure and confusion as to how.

I feel like shit about it and I would like to plan a quit that won't fail.

I'm just lost as to where to start after the fail and fail and fail that I've had.

Ben

edit: just to note, even stepping back here means a lot towards the right direction. I haven't dipped since midnight and its 2. I have no dip to chew and I have decided that I am not going to chew today at all. today is the 16th of november and I am tired of fighting with myself about something I know I want and need to do.

Offline redtrain14

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #68 on: September 27, 2010, 11:49:00 AM »
Quote from: Gregggg
Benny the Kid,

Don't listen to any of these assholes. I was in your shoes at one time this year and came back to this website after caving. They all gave me shit, just like they are doing to you right now. For some reason they think its going to help you, but I really think it just makes themselves feel better. Its quite pathetic. Just do it a day at a time. Welcome back and if you need to talk message me.


Greg
If you are looking for back rubs and ball coddling.....you're in the wrong spot.

Quitting isn't easy, we sure as hell are not going to make caving easy either. Some people are going to bust your balls, others will dust you off and get you on your feet. That's what makes this place work, if you let it.

Offline Gregggg

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #67 on: September 27, 2010, 08:55:00 AM »
Benny the Kid,

Don't listen to any of these assholes. I was in your shoes at one time this year and came back to this website after caving. They all gave me shit, just like they are doing to you right now. For some reason they think its going to help you, but I really think it just makes themselves feel better. Its quite pathetic. Just do it a day at a time. Welcome back and if you need to talk message me.


Greg
All I know is, the world doesn't revolve around me.

Offline Lost

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #66 on: September 26, 2010, 10:44:00 PM »
Two things dipshit...

1. Don't whine about no one being there for you or no one noticing you missing, are you really such an attention whore, or so self-conscious that you really need people to notice you?

2. Any reason you created a new "Intro"? You get one intro and you own it for life... you fuck up, it stays with you... but no calling a "do over" and making a new one.
RIP
JNH 08.07.2011
CAW 10.28.2010
TWB 06.26.2003

Fortes Fortuna adiuvat

07.18.2010

Offline bennythekid

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #65 on: September 23, 2010, 12:55:00 PM »
I regretted caving every day honestly, but I don't regret it now because it taught me a lot about how easy I can allow myself to slip up. My dad is in the 40s range in quitting smoking and we talkeda bout how its kind of a hard time because you almost forget how bad it was when you are doing so well.

yes, i will be in georgia 10/17 Fayetteville, GA @ The 11th Hour Venue

we're doing this tour with Venia to raise money for world hunger. info here http://renaemusic.tumblr.com/

i'm sorry i came in with attitude, i think i was expecting really harsh measures and it was late.

Offline tarpon17

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #64 on: September 23, 2010, 12:11:00 PM »
I'm with CMAY-Tell the group where/why/how you fell to the urge. Thats needed info to have to see where the support broke down, if it did.

I'm not gonna bust your balls, I'm a noob in December 2010, but hang tough and don't put the shit in your lip. ever.

Offline Fort

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Re: Last Chance for a Slow Dance take II
« Reply #63 on: September 23, 2010, 11:27:00 AM »
Quote from: bennythekid
Hello KTC friends, its beena little while since I have been on here.

somewhere around 49 days I caved. I know, I will get the harsh treatment for this and that's fair, but I kinda lost my marbles for a little while the last month or so.

Well, I'm on some solid ground again and my heart is healed up a lot and I realized I am free, and I quit for me over the summer. I am on tour right now and I just woke up today and knew I was ready to begin this again and actually achieve HOF status.

Some things that I would like to share that have been horrible since the relapse is that i realized i'm a human

okay.. that's true, actually, i was going to say that thanks to all of the support from you gys i knew how to support my 50 year old father into quitting cigarettes, using many of the same encouragement techniques, he has been quit for 40 days now today.. imagine how shameful I felt when I quit on him a few weeks into his quit.

I am certain to get hell from this, but now once did I lie on here, I kept every day that I posted 100%. It is my backslide and I really regret it. I want to thank Seth too because he kept me accountable for the last week before i budged.... but ultimately it was my choice.

I don't regret it, it was just what happened. I snapped, I was angry enough to do it without thought. I was spiteful enough to do it without care... and I am pledging to keep my head on clear. I have no one else to do this for but me anyways.

Begin the flaming.

I don't even know where to post my commitment to day two.
First off, change your fucking quit date in your signature.

Wait, maybe keep it in there and put first try.

Post up, stay quit.
Fuck em all and fucking no regrets.

Employ your time in improving yourself by other men's writings so that you shall come easily by what others have labored hard for.
- Socrates

Quit Date - 8/16/2010
HOF - 11/23/2010
1 YR - 8/15/2011
2 YR - 8/15/2012
9th Floor - 1/31/2013