Me and my Quit

[flrednek28]

The fog that seemed to be lifting this morning came back with a vengeance around lunch..(trigger). Add to that I run across a can of the bear in my desk at the office. No thank you, I did not cave and the can has been flushed. It does have me rattled though. The only thing I wanted worse than a pinch out of that can was to be free. The only reason I think being free from nic won out is because I have to answer roll to a bunch of turd brains I've never met. Said with genuine affection, of course. Without KTC I would have blown it today. Have not slept past midnight since I quit, insidious nic thoughts creeping in. Life is hard, accountability sucks. ODAAT. Tomorrow I post day 5.

Keep posting this stuff. You'll be able to read it later when the urges go away and you start thinking that you could just have one. I quit you today! And its Mr. Turd Brains to you.

To Mr. Turd Brains and fellow bretheren, I have been addicted far to long to even think I could ever again have just one. I quit. The thing that nic and fate seem to have in common is the fact neither one gives a shit about you. I don't believe in fate. I believe in quit. And I'll probably have to tell myself that everyday for the rest of my life.

I quit with You Today! You get it. You're doing it ODAAT. Great Job!

Holy bat shit crazy MikeM, gave me quite a few chuckles, welcome fellow May Quit brother, as with you 14 days in and still on this site as often as I can, can it does work. The first 4 days sucked then 7-12 could not sleep through night, finally last night all good, so stay strong and stay quit and will get through the worst of it and will be better. ODAAT and I QUIT with you!

[Derk40]

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Don't like what you've become? I fucking do! You, sir, are a quitter. Dip rage, pissed off, gibbering...I LOVE IT. And you should too. All this tells me is that you are doing this right!!!

My two cents...turn the tables on the nic bitch. Embrace the suck. Just as you DECIDED to be free, DECIDE that you will welcome the suck. It is the feeling of healing. It is the PRICE of FREEDOM. Nobody gets control for the asking. You have to earn it. For each trigger, train yourself to think, "Thanks for that reminder, bitch...but I'm quit!"


You said you laughed at yourself? Exactly. You can't change the past. What's done is done. So don't worry about it. And nobody knows the future. So don't worry about that either. All you can control is right now. And you have given us your word that you will be quit today. That is all that matters.

4 days in is HUGE. You're body has gotten rid of nicotine. You're running clean for the first time in years!!! Never miss an opportunity to celebrate and scoreboard the Nic Bitch. YOU'RE FREE, MIKE!!!

You got this. You can do this. Post roll, read all you can, and live free!!!

4 days! Nice job! Keep battling. When you feel the rage coming on at home... Get back in here and rage at us. Your family don't deserve your rage... That is why we are here and we can deal with it cuz we get it. They don't and will think you are nuts. You are not. You are just trying to get thru the SUCK and mood swings happen. ODAAT a brother. Quit on!

[Bean]

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Don't like what you've become? I fucking do! You, sir, are a quitter. Dip rage, pissed off, gibbering...I LOVE IT. And you should too. All this tells me is that you are doing this right!!!

My two cents...turn the tables on the nic bitch. Embrace the suck. Just as you DECIDED to be free, DECIDE that you will welcome the suck. It is the feeling of healing. It is the PRICE of FREEDOM. Nobody gets control for the asking. You have to earn it. For each trigger, train yourself to think, "Thanks for that reminder, bitch...but I'm quit!"


You said you laughed at yourself? Exactly. You can't change the past. What's done is done. So don't worry about it. And nobody knows the future. So don't worry about that either. All you can control is right now. And you have given us your word that you will be quit today. That is all that matters.

4 days in is HUGE. You're body has gotten rid of nicotine. You're running clean for the first time in years!!! Never miss an opportunity to celebrate and scoreboard the Nic Bitch. YOU'RE FREE, MIKE!!!

You got this. You can do this. Post roll, read all you can, and live free!!!

[30isEnuff]

The fog that seemed to be lifting this morning came back with a vengeance around lunch..(trigger). Add to that I run across a can of the bear in my desk at the office. No thank you, I did not cave and the can has been flushed. It does have me rattled though. The only thing I wanted worse than a pinch out of that can was to be free. The only reason I think being free from nic won out is because I have to answer roll to a bunch of turd brains I've never met. Said with genuine affection, of course. Without KTC I would have blown it today. Have not slept past midnight since I quit, insidious nic thoughts creeping in. Life is hard, accountability sucks. ODAAT. Tomorrow I post day 5.

Keep posting this stuff. You'll be able to read it later when the urges go away and you start thinking that you could just have one. I quit you today! And its Mr. Turd Brains to you.

To Mr. Turd Brains and fellow bretheren, I have been addicted far to long to even think I could ever again have just one. I quit. The thing that nic and fate seem to have in common is the fact neither one gives a shit about you. I don't believe in fate. I believe in quit. And I'll probably have to tell myself that everyday for the rest of my life.

I quit with You Today! You get it. You're doing it ODAAT. Great Job!

[MikeM]

The fog that seemed to be lifting this morning came back with a vengeance around lunch..(trigger). Add to that I run across a can of the bear in my desk at the office. No thank you, I did not cave and the can has been flushed. It does have me rattled though. The only thing I wanted worse than a pinch out of that can was to be free. The only reason I think being free from nic won out is because I have to answer roll to a bunch of turd brains I've never met. Said with genuine affection, of course. Without KTC I would have blown it today. Have not slept past midnight since I quit, insidious nic thoughts creeping in. Life is hard, accountability sucks. ODAAT. Tomorrow I post day 5.

Keep posting this stuff. You'll be able to read it later when the urges go away and you start thinking that you could just have one. I quit you today! And its Mr. Turd Brains to you.

To Mr. Turd Brains and fellow bretheren, I have been addicted far to long to even think I could ever again have just one. I quit. The thing that nic and fate seem to have in common is the fact neither one gives a shit about you. I don't believe in fate. I believe in quit. And I'll probably have to tell myself that everyday for the rest of my life.

[KennyZ]

The fog that seemed to be lifting this morning came back with a vengeance around lunch..(trigger). Add to that I run across a can of the bear in my desk at the office. No thank you, I did not cave and the can has been flushed. It does have me rattled though. The only thing I wanted worse than a pinch out of that can was to be free. The only reason I think being free from nic won out is because I have to answer roll to a bunch of turd brains I've never met. Said with genuine affection, of course. Without KTC I would have blown it today. Have not slept past midnight since I quit, insidious nic thoughts creeping in. Life is hard, accountability sucks. ODAAT. Tomorrow I post day 5.

Keep posting this stuff. You'll be able to read it later when the urges go away and you start thinking that you could just have one. I quit you today! And its Mr. Turd Brains to you.

[MikeM]

The fog that seemed to be lifting this morning came back with a vengeance around lunch..(trigger). Add to that I run across a can of the bear in my desk at the office. No thank you, I did not cave and the can has been flushed. It does have me rattled though. The only thing I wanted worse than a pinch out of that can was to be free. The only reason I think being free from nic won out is because I have to answer roll to a bunch of turd brains I've never met. Said with genuine affection, of course. Without KTC I would have blown it today. Have not slept past midnight since I quit, insidious nic thoughts creeping in. Life is hard, accountability sucks. ODAAT. Tomorrow I post day 5.

[30isEnuff]

So, I found this site and quit for the final time all on Monday afternoon. Oh yes, I've "quit" before. You could suppose I'm sort of a sadistic MF, as for the last year or so I have been so ashamed of my disease called addiction that I "quit" every Friday afternoon to be nic free with my wife and daughter. After reading most of the posts here the last 2 days, I'm sure you guys understand how that went. Nic free Fri. afternoon to Monday morning at the closest gas station? The words bat shit crazy bastard come to mind....I think those came from my wife. And she should know, she's put up with the dip bombs in the sink, hidden cans, sneaking down to the basement, and all of the other stupid shit for 18 years of marriage. She doesn't believe in quit anymore. Honestly, I never made it to Monday morning. I would usually be a freaking train wreck by saturday night and get out of bed to sneak a dip in the basement. And so on...

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

You can do this ODAAT. We are. If we can then YOU can too!
Stick around and your quit will stick.
we were not born with this poison in out mouths.
Welcome to the best of your life.

[KennyZ]

Great job posting roll! One day at a time; you got this! Glad to see the fog is lifting for you. Mine came and went for the first 30 days.

Keep up the great work! I quit with you today.

[pab1964]

So, I found this site and quit for the final time all on Monday afternoon. Oh yes, I've "quit" before. You could suppose I'm sort of a sadistic MF, as for the last year or so I have been so ashamed of my disease called addiction that I "quit" every Friday afternoon to be nic free with my wife and daughter. After reading most of the posts here the last 2 days, I'm sure you guys understand how that went. Nic free Fri. afternoon to Monday morning at the closest gas station? The words bat shit crazy bastard come to mind....I think those came from my wife. And she should know, she's put up with the dip bombs in the sink, hidden cans, sneaking down to the basement, and all of the other stupid shit for 18 years of marriage. She doesn't believe in quit anymore. Honestly, I never made it to Monday morning. I would usually be a freaking train wreck by saturday night and get out of bed to sneak a dip in the basement. And so on...

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Thanks brother for joining! Realize your an addict, you have a great start on your quit! No matter what happens rage, fog,headaches,shits its all worth it growing old with your family but you have to stay focused post roll edd! First thing when you get up giving us and yourself a promise that you are a grown ass man giving us your word you will not use any form of nicotine for that day and worry about tomorrow when it gets here! You will have rage try to walk away my friend! Proud to be quit with you my brother!

[pab1964]

So, I found this site and quit for the final time all on Monday afternoon. Oh yes, I've "quit" before. You could suppose I'm sort of a sadistic MF, as for the last year or so I have been so ashamed of my disease called addiction that I "quit" every Friday afternoon to be nic free with my wife and daughter. After reading most of the posts here the last 2 days, I'm sure you guys understand how that went. Nic free Fri. afternoon to Monday morning at the closest gas station? The words bat shit crazy bastard come to mind....I think those came from my wife. And she should know, she's put up with the dip bombs in the sink, hidden cans, sneaking down to the basement, and all of the other stupid shit for 18 years of marriage. She doesn't believe in quit anymore. Honestly, I never made it to Monday morning. I would usually be a freaking train wreck by saturday night and get out of bed to sneak a dip in the basement. And so on...

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Thanks brother for joining! Realize your an addict, you have a great start on your quit! No matter what happens rage, fog,headaches,shits its all worth it growing old with your family but you have to stay focused post roll edd! First thing when you get up giving us and yourself a promise that you are a grown ass man giving us your word you will not use any form of nicotine for that day and worry about tomorrow when it gets here! You will have rage try to walk away my friend! Proud to be quit with you my brother!

[Rawls]

Hey Mike,
You got a great start going. And those boys in your office are jealous.!
You quit On brother.
With you all day ODAAT.
PM me for numbers if you need em.
Rawls

[Jeff W.]

We got a badass on our hands, here, fellas...

Badass quitter, that is! Mike, I'm glad you found this community and have made the decision to be quit. I'm quit with you today. I'm going to shoot you a PM with my digits so that you can call or text and rage on me instead of the wife and kid, or just need support in general.

[jpetmpls]

Best intro I've read yet, and I think I've read thousands...

Thanks, man, you've made my quit stronger today. And for that, I quit with you.

[copingwithoutcopen]

Welcome Mike, you've done the smartest thing you've ever done. Self loathing can be a thing of the past should you follow the plan. It's simple, you get it. It gets a little better every day until it's hardly a thing. You just gotta give it some time. #thelastquit