Me and my Quit

[KennyZ]

Congratulations on 1,000 days!

[KennyZ]

Congratulations on 2 years!

[KennyZ]

Congratulations on 600 days!

[Candoit]

Bad Ass Half Comma!

[KennyZ]

Congratulations on 1 year!

[KennyZ]

Belated congratulations on 300!

[KennyZ]

Congratulations on 200!! That is bad ass!!

[KennyZ]

Congratulations on 100! Thank you for helping me quit!

[MikeM]

A little over halfway to HOF and some basic truths stand out, some good, some a little depressing

Good: I'm still quit, ODAAT. Help is all around you. Posting roll really works. There have been a few times, naturally, that I should have caved, but accountability to strangers is stronger than my word to myself. I recognize what it means to be an addict, and by that knowledge have gained power. Being nic free has cleaned up other areas of my life. I am free of the cage I never saw until too late.

A little depressing: I know enough about myself and quitting at this point that I realize I have an addict mentality, and will have to guard against all things addictive all of my life. Halfway to HOF is like barely getting your pinky out of the quicksand, there is still so much work to be done, and it will never end. There is a lure in that cage I left that will never shut up, but it is just the siren on the rocks. In the stage that Beast42a warned of, and it is complacent, full of rage, and cravings full bore.

Take what you need, leave the rest. Freaking addicts cover all points on the spectrum.

Quit with you all.

[KennyZ]

Congratulations on posting day 40! Thank you for helping me quit!

[rdad]

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Don't like what you've become? I fucking do! You, sir, are a quitter. Dip rage, pissed off, gibbering...I LOVE IT. And you should too. All this tells me is that you are doing this right!!!

My two cents...turn the tables on the nic bitch. Embrace the suck. Just as you DECIDED to be free, DECIDE that you will welcome the suck. It is the feeling of healing. It is the PRICE of FREEDOM. Nobody gets control for the asking. You have to earn it. For each trigger, train yourself to think, "Thanks for that reminder, bitch...but I'm quit!"


You said you laughed at yourself? Exactly. You can't change the past. What's done is done. So don't worry about it. And nobody knows the future. So don't worry about that either. All you can control is right now. And you have given us your word that you will be quit today. That is all that matters.

4 days in is HUGE. You're body has gotten rid of nicotine. You're running clean for the first time in years!!! Never miss an opportunity to celebrate and scoreboard the Nic Bitch. YOU'RE FREE, MIKE!!!

You got this. You can do this. Post roll, read all you can, and live free!!!

4 days! Nice job! Keep battling. When you feel the rage coming on at home... Get back in here and rage at us. Your family don't deserve your rage... That is why we are here and we can deal with it cuz we get it. They don't and will think you are nuts. You are not. You are just trying to get thru the SUCK and mood swings happen. ODAAT a brother. Quit on!

I really like the way Bean puts perspective on my quit. Its Friday afternoon, quit is good, and all I have to do is feed my suck. Or was it bite my suck? Face the fuck? Oh, there it is goddammit...embrace the suck. Very good advice for me...lets snuggle up to this shit rather than wallowing around in it. Anyways, two cents is worth more like 20 bucks. Fog seems to be fading for now, and rather than being pissed I seem to find everything insanely funny at the moment. Head is ringing like a freaking bell, but as I embrace the suck, I realize that is the sound of freedom. Tell the little whore nic I've got something to tell her. As I sit and embrace the suck, for you Ms. Nic, you can go get fucked. Reaffirming my quit. ODAAT.

Some good quit in here. My only advice is make your quit a daily routine. It's the same as taking a dump and brushing your teeth in the morning. Do it every damn day.

Way to be Mike! This if your first weekend quit. Keep all your tools and KTC close by. Shout out often. We are all behind you. 'oh yeah'

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Don't like what you've become? I fucking do! You, sir, are a quitter. Dip rage, pissed off, gibbering...I LOVE IT. And you should too. All this tells me is that you are doing this right!!!

My two cents...turn the tables on the nic bitch. Embrace the suck. Just as you DECIDED to be free, DECIDE that you will welcome the suck. It is the feeling of healing. It is the PRICE of FREEDOM. Nobody gets control for the asking. You have to earn it. For each trigger, train yourself to think, "Thanks for that reminder, bitch...but I'm quit!"


You said you laughed at yourself? Exactly. You can't change the past. What's done is done. So don't worry about it. And nobody knows the future. So don't worry about that either. All you can control is right now. And you have given us your word that you will be quit today. That is all that matters.

4 days in is HUGE. You're body has gotten rid of nicotine. You're running clean for the first time in years!!! Never miss an opportunity to celebrate and scoreboard the Nic Bitch. YOU'RE FREE, MIKE!!!

You got this. You can do this. Post roll, read all you can, and live free!!!

4 days! Nice job! Keep battling. When you feel the rage coming on at home... Get back in here and rage at us. Your family don't deserve your rage... That is why we are here and we can deal with it cuz we get it. They don't and will think you are nuts. You are not. You are just trying to get thru the SUCK and mood swings happen. ODAAT a brother. Quit on!

I really like the way Bean puts perspective on my quit. Its Friday afternoon, quit is good, and all I have to do is feed my suck. Or was it bite my suck? Face the fuck? Oh, there it is goddammit...embrace the suck. Very good advice for me...lets snuggle up to this shit rather than wallowing around in it. Anyways, two cents is worth more like 20 bucks. Fog seems to be fading for now, and rather than being pissed I seem to find everything insanely funny at the moment. Head is ringing like a freaking bell, but as I embrace the suck, I realize that is the sound of freedom. Tell the little whore nic I've got something to tell her. As I sit and embrace the suck, for you Ms. Nic, you can go get fucked. Reaffirming my quit. ODAAT.

Some good quit in here. My only advice is make your quit a daily routine. It's the same as taking a dump and brushing your teeth in the morning. Do it every damn day.

[MikeM]

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Don't like what you've become? I fucking do! You, sir, are a quitter. Dip rage, pissed off, gibbering...I LOVE IT. And you should too. All this tells me is that you are doing this right!!!

My two cents...turn the tables on the nic bitch. Embrace the suck. Just as you DECIDED to be free, DECIDE that you will welcome the suck. It is the feeling of healing. It is the PRICE of FREEDOM. Nobody gets control for the asking. You have to earn it. For each trigger, train yourself to think, "Thanks for that reminder, bitch...but I'm quit!"


You said you laughed at yourself? Exactly. You can't change the past. What's done is done. So don't worry about it. And nobody knows the future. So don't worry about that either. All you can control is right now. And you have given us your word that you will be quit today. That is all that matters.

4 days in is HUGE. You're body has gotten rid of nicotine. You're running clean for the first time in years!!! Never miss an opportunity to celebrate and scoreboard the Nic Bitch. YOU'RE FREE, MIKE!!!

You got this. You can do this. Post roll, read all you can, and live free!!!

4 days! Nice job! Keep battling. When you feel the rage coming on at home... Get back in here and rage at us. Your family don't deserve your rage... That is why we are here and we can deal with it cuz we get it. They don't and will think you are nuts. You are not. You are just trying to get thru the SUCK and mood swings happen. ODAAT a brother. Quit on!

I really like the way Bean puts perspective on my quit. Its Friday afternoon, quit is good, and all I have to do is feed my suck. Or was it bite my suck? Face the fuck? Oh, there it is goddammit...embrace the suck. Very good advice for me...lets snuggle up to this shit rather than wallowing around in it. Anyways, two cents is worth more like 20 bucks. Fog seems to be fading for now, and rather than being pissed I seem to find everything insanely funny at the moment. Head is ringing like a freaking bell, but as I embrace the suck, I realize that is the sound of freedom. Tell the little whore nic I've got something to tell her. As I sit and embrace the suck, for you Ms. Nic, you can go get fucked. Reaffirming my quit. ODAAT.

[pab1964]

br /br /I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.br /br /So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.br /That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.br /br /So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.br /br /And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Don't like what you've become? I fucking do! You, sir, are a quitter. Dip rage, pissed off, gibbering...I LOVE IT. And you should too. All this tells me is that you are doing this right!!!br /br /My two cents...turn the tables on the nic bitch. Embrace the suck. Just as you DECIDED to be free, DECIDE that you will welcome the suck. It is the feeling of healing. It is the PRICE of FREEDOM. Nobody gets control for the asking. You have to earn it. For each trigger, train yourself to think, "Thanks for that reminder, bitch...but I'm quit!" br /br /br /You said you laughed at yourself? Exactly. You can't change the past. What's done is done. So don't worry about it. And nobody knows the future. So don't worry about that either. All you can control is right now. And you have given us your word that you will be quit today. That is all that matters.br /br /4 days in is HUGE. You're body has gotten rid of nicotine. You're running clean for the first time in years!!! Never miss an opportunity to celebrate and scoreboard the Nic Bitch. YOU'RE FREE, MIKE!!!br /br /You got this. You can do this. Post roll, read all you can, and live free!!!

4 days! Nice job! Keep battling. When you feel the rage coming on at home... Get back in here and rage at us. Your family don't deserve your rage... That is why we are here and we can deal with it cuz we get it. They don't and will think you are nuts. You are not. You are just trying to get thru the SUCK and mood swings happen. ODAAT a brother. Quit on!

Damn right brother it sucks about as bad as a vesectomy! I've dealt with both! Bean said it roght get made at this nic bitch stay a step ahead its awesome when you can see her creeping up on you and cut her ass off before she gets there! Hang in there brpther worth every damn second of the suck! Damn proud be quit with you! ODAAT! Post roll! EDD!

[pab1964]

I am here, and I have posted roll my first 3 days not because I make yet another promise to quit to anyone. I have Quit. past tense. I think most of you can relate to the self loathing and guilt we twist in as we put yet another pinch in, even as the more intelligent part of our mind screams in denial. The intelligent part never wins. I know the only reason I can say I have Quit is because I have spent the entire time since I quit with this site minimized in the background, and it gets pulled up every time I want to go buy a can of Kodiak. Yes, basically just read this for the last two days straight. I have known for a long time what addiction has done to me. I don't like who I've become. I don't like being anyone's whore. And yes, I can feel it in my bones, those brothers around me actually do know what the hell they are talking about. Wives and children may hear you, but only the addict truly understands.

So, at the risk of going on in a gibbering fog trying to say things others have already said before with far more repose, I quit. And this is my third day. And I think Chewie must be laughing at me , because I am so pissed off. Dip rage is real, and I so bad want to break my fucking keyboard on the face of the guy dipping down the hall. I want to chase down that squirrel in the parking lot and kill it. The whole world is stupid, and everyone is just a bunch of faggots. Then I start laughing at myself, just as surely as some of you chuckle at me now.
That whackjob nic whore is almost 3 full days behind me. Tomorrow it will be 4. And when I hear her siren call in the future, you may rest assured I will have my best smile on as I turn and walk on. This isn't about hoping or wanting, trying or participating for me. I can't stand that shit. This is about what you do. It's not about talking about how you feel. Be accountable and take action. Participation trophies don't interest me.

So with all that being said, I quit. I will reaffirm that tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. And keeping in mind if feels like a horse just kicked me in the face and I feel a little bit crazy, I do want make sure you guys will break it off in my arse if you should not see my name. I've quit before by myself. It didn't work.

And lastly, I am scared to death to go home before the wife and kid are in bed. I might hate the world right now, but also know myself well enough to know I will lash out at them. They deserve better.

Don't like what you've become? I fucking do! You, sir, are a quitter. Dip rage, pissed off, gibbering...I LOVE IT. And you should too. All this tells me is that you are doing this right!!!

My two cents...turn the tables on the nic bitch. Embrace the suck. Just as you DECIDED to be free, DECIDE that you will welcome the suck. It is the feeling of healing. It is the PRICE of FREEDOM. Nobody gets control for the asking. You have to earn it. For each trigger, train yourself to think, "Thanks for that reminder, bitch...but I'm quit!"


You said you laughed at yourself? Exactly. You can't change the past. What's done is done. So don't worry about it. And nobody knows the future. So don't worry about that either. All you can control is right now. And you have given us your word that you will be quit today. That is all that matters.

4 days in is HUGE. You're body has gotten rid of nicotine. You're running clean for the first time in years!!! Never miss an opportunity to celebrate and scoreboard the Nic Bitch. YOU'RE FREE, MIKE!!!

You got this. You can do this. Post roll, read all you can, and live free!!!

4 days! Nice job! Keep battling. When you feel the rage coming on at home... Get back in here and rage at us. Your family don't deserve your rage... That is why we are here and we can deal with it cuz we get it. They don't and will think you are nuts. You are not. You are just trying to get thru the SUCK and mood swings happen. ODAAT a brother. Quit on!

Damn right brother it sucks about as bad as a vesectomy! I've dealt with both! Bean said it roght get made at this nic bitch stay a step ahead its awesome when you can see her creeping up on you and cut her ass off before she gets there! Hang in there brpther worth every damn second of the suck! Damn proud be quit with you! ODAAT! Post roll! EDD!