Proud to say I will be a quitter

[Mogul]

Anatomy of a Roll Post

This is the way that I look at the posting of roll from my 2 years being here.

The roll posting for an individual is like a signature on a contract. It provides the validity to the promise that is given each and every day. But letÂ’s look at it deeper:

UsernameÂ…Â…Day CountÂ…Â…CommentÂ…Â….Other

Roll consists of what I see as 4 parts. One is critical, One is requested but not absolute, and the other two are optional.

Username: This is the most absolute critical part of the roll. This is the person that is providing their promise that he/she will not use nicotine for the next 24 hour period. This is the person that is then honoring this contract each and every day. This person should recognize the impact that the name has on the roll as it says that in addition to being there for him/herself that he/she will also be there for others, as that is one of the defining factors of brotherhood. Now when on the roll, when entering the name does it have to be the same person that is actually, technically adding it, no it does not. And I will get to that in a moment.

Day Count: Here is the second requested part of the roll. I say requested only because some who have been around use +1 when recording it. Me I have done this but not frequently. I like to look at the quit calculator and see the actual number of days that I have been quit and then record that number. I actually recommend this to the newer quitters as you take it One Day at a Time, and can see how the numbers add up day after day.

Comment: now here is an optional part. Is anything else needed at this point, no there is not. But I would like to point out that this comment is a good place for a short statement of how you are feeling from time to time. Or it can be a place to ask for help or to ask a question. Some have used it to answer a question of the day so that the group gets to know each other a little. Me I used this the most to tell how I was feeling. I also look through the groups and use this an identifier for who I should send off a little PM for support. So yes this is optional but can and should be used as a tool to help you when needed.

Other: again this is a 4th part and is optional and just to give a short mention. This would be the bump fix where those would help out and update the roll for those who have gotten bumped during the day. It happens to everyone. And still happens in the older groups. This is also where we can add via ‘location’ for when people contact others to put them on the roll for when they do not have computer access or just cannot get onto it them self. So this is why earlier I mentioned that the one doing the actual posting does not have to be the name of the person as roll. So use this in these cases to help one another out, as this is being there in this brotherhood that you are now a part of.

And most of all from what I have seen in my time here: When a roll call is made, and these 4 parts are on it, DO NOT ALTER, TOUCH, DEFACE, CHANGE THE POST OF ANOTHER. As that is the personÂ’s oath, and no matter what we may think, it is their responsibility to follow up that oath with their actions.

perfection

[SirDerek]

Anatomy of a Roll Post

This is the way that I look at the posting of roll from my 2 years being here.

The roll posting for an individual is like a signature on a contract. It provides the validity to the promise that is given each and every day. But letÂ’s look at it deeper:

UsernameÂ…Â…Day CountÂ…Â…CommentÂ…Â….Other

Roll consists of what I see as 4 parts. One is critical, One is requested but not absolute, and the other two are optional.

Username: This is the most absolute critical part of the roll. This is the person that is providing their promise that he/she will not use nicotine for the next 24 hour period. This is the person that is then honoring this contract each and every day. This person should recognize the impact that the name has on the roll as it says that in addition to being there for him/herself that he/she will also be there for others, as that is one of the defining factors of brotherhood. Now when on the roll, when entering the name does it have to be the same person that is actually, technically adding it, no it does not. And I will get to that in a moment.

Day Count: Here is the second requested part of the roll. I say requested only because some who have been around use +1 when recording it. Me I have done this but not frequently. I like to look at the quit calculator and see the actual number of days that I have been quit and then record that number. I actually recommend this to the newer quitters as you take it One Day at a Time, and can see how the numbers add up day after day.

Comment: now here is an optional part. Is anything else needed at this point, no there is not. But I would like to point out that this comment is a good place for a short statement of how you are feeling from time to time. Or it can be a place to ask for help or to ask a question. Some have used it to answer a question of the day so that the group gets to know each other a little. Me I used this the most to tell how I was feeling. I also look through the groups and use this an identifier for who I should send off a little PM for support. So yes this is optional but can and should be used as a tool to help you when needed.

Other: again this is a 4th part and is optional and just to give a short mention. This would be the bump fix where those would help out and update the roll for those who have gotten bumped during the day. It happens to everyone. And still happens in the older groups. This is also where we can add via ‘location’ for when people contact others to put them on the roll for when they do not have computer access or just cannot get onto it them self. So this is why earlier I mentioned that the one doing the actual posting does not have to be the name of the person as roll. So use this in these cases to help one another out, as this is being there in this brotherhood that you are now a part of.

And most of all from what I have seen in my time here: When a roll call is made, and these 4 parts are on it, DO NOT ALTER, TOUCH, DEFACE, CHANGE THE POST OF ANOTHER. As that is the personÂ’s oath, and no matter what we may think, it is their responsibility to follow up that oath with their actions.

[Kdip]

Day 765 -

I think at one time we all have asked the question "Does there ever come a day when I don't think of nicotine for 24 hours? and When does this day happen"

Well the short answer is Yes. A longer answer from my own experience was that it was in the 130 day range, I hear others say it was up in the 220-250 range, but it will arrive.

And can give an example to show how powerful the realization can be:

This past weekend was the 3rd time since I have quit where I attended my son's county swim championships.

Now earlier in my thread I ran through the account where First Year I almost caved that weekend as it was just a 10 minute walk to the gas station. It was (after the first 2 weeks) the closest that I had come.

The Second Year, we got there in the morning and I took a walk for coffee to that same gas station, I was laughing along the way thinking I should have fun texting others (note in year 1 I had Zero numbers at that time). Well I remember buying the coffee but still focusing on the wall of death. So it was progress.

Well this as mentioned was 3rd Year. Went the same for coffee, got coffee, paid and left. About 200 yards out of the store I realized I had not even noticed the wall. Nothing. No Focus or nothing. I tried to remember the cashier and behind her was all a blur. It shook me for the good but felt so great. And in all this, there was no thought of ever putting that crap in my mouth that day.

So I know it may not seem like it now, but please give it time and do not rush it, as it does get so much better.

I only hope that you sit around the table with me and Trust me.

Great share Derek. I called that my FUCK IT! day, when nicotine was no longer a factor for me. I don't know if it is truly that my body no longer has the chemical dependency on the drug but mentally I have seen enough bullshit and have just decided that I am not going back to the addict me. Granted I am still an addict until I can counterbalance the concurrent quit years with the addiction years, but there is no way in hell that I am going to change.

Change is normally progress but that change I will no revert back to.

I will sit at the table with you, but damn can a brother get a spoon?

So there may be hope for me too? Every time I see that rack of death I want to fire gasoline all over it and pop a flare on it...

I looked at the wall in a c-store recently and it amazes me how much of it is taken up these days by all the different brands and flavors of cancer cans. When I started back in the dark ages, you had a huge wall of cancer sticks and a couple of cardboard or metal holders with maybe 4 or 5 different flavors of cat turd. Not a bit of crave especially when looking at how much that crap costs these days! Proud to be a quitter today!!!

[B-loMatt]

Day 765 -

I think at one time we all have asked the question "Does there ever come a day when I don't think of nicotine for 24 hours? and When does this day happen"

Well the short answer is Yes. A longer answer from my own experience was that it was in the 130 day range, I hear others say it was up in the 220-250 range, but it will arrive.

And can give an example to show how powerful the realization can be:

This past weekend was the 3rd time since I have quit where I attended my son's county swim championships.

Now earlier in my thread I ran through the account where First Year I almost caved that weekend as it was just a 10 minute walk to the gas station. It was (after the first 2 weeks) the closest that I had come.

The Second Year, we got there in the morning and I took a walk for coffee to that same gas station, I was laughing along the way thinking I should have fun texting others (note in year 1 I had Zero numbers at that time). Well I remember buying the coffee but still focusing on the wall of death. So it was progress.

Well this as mentioned was 3rd Year. Went the same for coffee, got coffee, paid and left. About 200 yards out of the store I realized I had not even noticed the wall. Nothing. No Focus or nothing. I tried to remember the cashier and behind her was all a blur. It shook me for the good but felt so great. And in all this, there was no thought of ever putting that crap in my mouth that day.

So I know it may not seem like it now, but please give it time and do not rush it, as it does get so much better.

I only hope that you sit around the table with me and Trust me.

Great share Derek. I called that my FUCK IT! day, when nicotine was no longer a factor for me. I don't know if it is truly that my body no longer has the chemical dependency on the drug but mentally I have seen enough bullshit and have just decided that I am not going back to the addict me. Granted I am still an addict until I can counterbalance the concurrent quit years with the addiction years, but there is no way in hell that I am going to change.

Change is normally progress but that change I will no revert back to.

I will sit at the table with you, but damn can a brother get a spoon?

So there may be hope for me too? Every time I see that rack of death I want to fire gasoline all over it and pop a flare on it...

[Pinched]

Day 765 -

I think at one time we all have asked the question "Does there ever come a day when I don't think of nicotine for 24 hours? and When does this day happen"

Well the short answer is Yes. A longer answer from my own experience was that it was in the 130 day range, I hear others say it was up in the 220-250 range, but it will arrive.

And can give an example to show how powerful the realization can be:

This past weekend was the 3rd time since I have quit where I attended my son's county swim championships.

Now earlier in my thread I ran through the account where First Year I almost caved that weekend as it was just a 10 minute walk to the gas station. It was (after the first 2 weeks) the closest that I had come.

The Second Year, we got there in the morning and I took a walk for coffee to that same gas station, I was laughing along the way thinking I should have fun texting others (note in year 1 I had Zero numbers at that time). Well I remember buying the coffee but still focusing on the wall of death. So it was progress.

Well this as mentioned was 3rd Year. Went the same for coffee, got coffee, paid and left. About 200 yards out of the store I realized I had not even noticed the wall. Nothing. No Focus or nothing. I tried to remember the cashier and behind her was all a blur. It shook me for the good but felt so great. And in all this, there was no thought of ever putting that crap in my mouth that day.

So I know it may not seem like it now, but please give it time and do not rush it, as it does get so much better.

I only hope that you sit around the table with me and Trust me.

Great share Derek. I called that my FUCK IT! day, when nicotine was no longer a factor for me. I don't know if it is truly that my body no longer has the chemical dependency on the drug but mentally I have seen enough bullshit and have just decided that I am not going back to the addict me. Granted I am still an addict until I can counterbalance the concurrent quit years with the addiction years, but there is no way in hell that I am going to change.

Change is normally progress but that change I will no revert back to.

I will sit at the table with you, but damn can a brother get a spoon?

[SirDerek]

Day 765 -

I think at one time we all have asked the question "Does there ever come a day when I don't think of nicotine for 24 hours? and When does this day happen"

Well the short answer is Yes. A longer answer from my own experience was that it was in the 130 day range, I hear others say it was up in the 220-250 range, but it will arrive.

And can give an example to show how powerful the realization can be:

This past weekend was the 3rd time since I have quit where I attended my son's county swim championships.

Now earlier in my thread I ran through the account where First Year I almost caved that weekend as it was just a 10 minute walk to the gas station. It was (after the first 2 weeks) the closest that I had come.

The Second Year, we got there in the morning and I took a walk for coffee to that same gas station, I was laughing along the way thinking I should have fun texting others (note in year 1 I had Zero numbers at that time). Well I remember buying the coffee but still focusing on the wall of death. So it was progress.

Well this as mentioned was 3rd Year. Went the same for coffee, got coffee, paid and left. About 200 yards out of the store I realized I had not even noticed the wall. Nothing. No Focus or nothing. I tried to remember the cashier and behind her was all a blur. It shook me for the good but felt so great. And in all this, there was no thought of ever putting that crap in my mouth that day.

So I know it may not seem like it now, but please give it time and do not rush it, as it does get so much better.

I only hope that you sit around the table with me and Trust me.

[Enough snuff]

From the roundtable this is a little different story to tell, as this looks to others for what they may have encountered.

Ok so whatÂ’s next?

This past week not sure if it is some funk, or some life event (no birthdays or anything special in the family), but all of a sudden if feels like there is something amiss.

Am I happy? ABSOLUTELY as donÂ’t think I could be happier, as I have many days now where I really do not think about putting nicotine in my body.

I keep putting myself out there to help others, so donÂ’t think its complacency setting in as I do realize that I can never again ingest a lick of nicotine.

It just feels real weird right now. Not really missing it. And know I have replaced it with certain personal challenges, and other items like my exercise and such. But still feels like I am looking for what is next?

This probably makes no sense to a newer quitter but I am looking towards those who have more days than myself to see if they have advice or if they have gone through this.

This is an important crossroads moment derek. I think even some of the most active quitters fade because they don't really know where to go from here. I have been where you are... and the only answer I can give is to fight with everything you have to keep from fading away. Because fading is what most people do when they get to where you are.

My time here has had many periods just like the one that you are going through. For a while I was only here first thing in the morning to post roll and at the end of the day to check in to see what happened in my group over the day. Other times I practically lived here.

What you are going through is inevitable. How you respond to it is your choice. Push through it, friend.

X2

Couldn't have said it any better myself, 30. How much energy I have to focus on my quit, the quits of others, and KTC as a whole is cyclical. At least for me, those emptiness feelings you have comes during those downward trends. A sort of re-dedication, picking up a brand new quitter to guide, spending more time in chat, etc. Whatever it may be, for you. That's what has pulled me through those "blah" periods.

sd - first of all thanks for all your help in helping this blind squirrel find the acron. Could it be it's like the weight looser who hits the wall. They're still doing the diet thing but the weights just isn't coming off like it use to. Those who stay the course reap the benefit. Those who get frustrated tend to loose there way and fade back into the weight gain issue. Keep both eyes on the road and get past this. Old ES

[BG]

From the roundtable this is a little different story to tell, as this looks to others for what they may have encountered.

Ok so whatÂ’s next?

This past week not sure if it is some funk, or some life event (no birthdays or anything special in the family), but all of a sudden if feels like there is something amiss.

Am I happy? ABSOLUTELY as donÂ’t think I could be happier, as I have many days now where I really do not think about putting nicotine in my body.

I keep putting myself out there to help others, so donÂ’t think its complacency setting in as I do realize that I can never again ingest a lick of nicotine.

It just feels real weird right now. Not really missing it. And know I have replaced it with certain personal challenges, and other items like my exercise and such. But still feels like I am looking for what is next?

This probably makes no sense to a newer quitter but I am looking towards those who have more days than myself to see if they have advice or if they have gone through this.

This is an important crossroads moment derek. I think even some of the most active quitters fade because they don't really know where to go from here. I have been where you are... and the only answer I can give is to fight with everything you have to keep from fading away. Because fading is what most people do when they get to where you are.

My time here has had many periods just like the one that you are going through. For a while I was only here first thing in the morning to post roll and at the end of the day to check in to see what happened in my group over the day. Other times I practically lived here.

What you are going through is inevitable. How you respond to it is your choice. Push through it, friend.

X2

Couldn't have said it any better myself, 30. How much energy I have to focus on my quit, the quits of others, and KTC as a whole is cyclical. At least for me, those emptiness feelings you have comes during those downward trends. A sort of re-dedication, picking up a brand new quitter to guide, spending more time in chat, etc. Whatever it may be, for you. That's what has pulled me through those "blah" periods.

[30yraddict]

From the roundtable this is a little different story to tell, as this looks to others for what they may have encountered.

Ok so whatÂ’s next?

This past week not sure if it is some funk, or some life event (no birthdays or anything special in the family), but all of a sudden if feels like there is something amiss.

Am I happy? ABSOLUTELY as donÂ’t think I could be happier, as I have many days now where I really do not think about putting nicotine in my body.

I keep putting myself out there to help others, so donÂ’t think its complacency setting in as I do realize that I can never again ingest a lick of nicotine.

It just feels real weird right now. Not really missing it. And know I have replaced it with certain personal challenges, and other items like my exercise and such. But still feels like I am looking for what is next?

This probably makes no sense to a newer quitter but I am looking towards those who have more days than myself to see if they have advice or if they have gone through this.

This is an important crossroads moment derek. I think even some of the most active quitters fade because they don't really know where to go from here. I have been where you are... and the only answer I can give is to fight with everything you have to keep from fading away. Because fading is what most people do when they get to where you are.

My time here has had many periods just like the one that you are going through. For a while I was only here first thing in the morning to post roll and at the end of the day to check in to see what happened in my group over the day. Other times I practically lived here.

What you are going through is inevitable. How you respond to it is your choice. Push through it, friend.

[SirDerek]

From the roundtable this is a little different story to tell, as this looks to others for what they may have encountered.

Ok so whatÂ’s next?

This past week not sure if it is some funk, or some life event (no birthdays or anything special in the family), but all of a sudden if feels like there is something amiss.

Am I happy? ABSOLUTELY as donÂ’t think I could be happier, as I have many days now where I really do not think about putting nicotine in my body.

I keep putting myself out there to help others, so donÂ’t think its complacency setting in as I do realize that I can never again ingest a lick of nicotine.

It just feels real weird right now. Not really missing it. And know I have replaced it with certain personal challenges, and other items like my exercise and such. But still feels like I am looking for what is next?

This probably makes no sense to a newer quitter but I am looking towards those who have more days than myself to see if they have advice or if they have gone through this.

[Pinched]

Day 750

Well three-quarters way to the Hall of Legends, another great milestone for me to target. And just cannot believe it still. But I wanted to again state thank you and to look at answering a question in a little different way. When we quit we get asked a lot of questions as to why we quit. And I have answered and asked them time and time again, but from another perspective, I wanted to list out “What I have Gained”, since I quit:

So Since I have quit:

-Yes the top item is that I have kept nicotine from my body for these 750 days. That means none of that poison has been introduced into this body since I quit

Now in of itself, that would be a tremendous benefit, but this has only been the base, really only a small portion of what I have gained. Here is more of this list that I think many have also encountered along this journey.

-I have gained the honor of keeping my word and not lying to those around me. For how long did we lie day in and day out for when we were trying to quit. So I have definitely gained back a large chunk of my integrity.
-I have gained a sense of smell and taste to where food, drink and natures pleasures are so much sweeter now a days since I do not have it masked by that horrendous odor.
-I have gained my health. Now with this comes 2-fold as the exercise program that I am currently using (DDPYoga) was introduced to me by Sox2012 from the Sept 12 group. So before quitting I was on blood pressure meds with a BP 160/90 and during my first 100 days I put on close to 35 pounds getting close to 300, not my heaviest but was not in good shape. Well I have regained that, I no longer use the meds, BP is down to around 125/80, I am at less than 250 pounds, and feel like I am in the best physical shape of my life. So I would say that learning one thing here gave me the confidence to improve in this area.
-I have gained a little bit of a bulging pocketbook. Yes the dollars saved, though may not have been as much as some others, it has lead me to treating myself to a few items as a reward.
-I have gained time. Here is one that has also had a great impact. No more searching for more, running out to the store, or the time spent trying to get the next fix. But also the time spent away from my loved ones as I separated myself, even if mentally while in the same room. The time running to the bathroom to rid myself of it before eatingÂ….just amazing what recollecting a few minutes a day can do.
-I have also gained the anywhere/anytime for those special moments with the wife, where she can kiss me whenever she wants.
-And finally off the top of my head, I have gained the best friends and extended family a person could ask for. As yes, any here would reach out their hand to help support me in my quit, but when that extends to real life, where now I feel that I can go just about anywhere in the United States and have a meal, have a drink, or enjoy the company, now that is something special that I never expected. Where I can pick up the phone and call any one of many people just to talk, it truly a blessing.

So as you can see, some of the items on this list were on my list of initial reasons for quitting, but when you look back on it, there is the ability to gain so much more than you expect, and I am sure there are others that have more than what I have listed here.

Very well said Derek. I would love to witness you hitting that Hall of Legends, but since my first week of quit you have been my own personal legend that helped guide me along the quit path. Plus you are my October brother, just from another mother.

You Rawk oh Knighted One!

[SirDerek]

Day 750

Well three-quarters way to the Hall of Legends, another great milestone for me to target. And just cannot believe it still. But I wanted to again state thank you and to look at answering a question in a little different way. When we quit we get asked a lot of questions as to why we quit. And I have answered and asked them time and time again, but from another perspective, I wanted to list out “What I have Gained”, since I quit:

So Since I have quit:

-   Yes the top item is that I have kept nicotine from my body for these 750 days. That means none of that poison has been introduced into this body since I quit

Now in of itself, that would be a tremendous benefit, but this has only been the base, really only a small portion of what I have gained. Here is more of this list that I think many have also encountered along this journey.

-   I have gained the honor of keeping my word and not lying to those around me. For how long did we lie day in and day out for when we were trying to quit. So I have definitely gained back a large chunk of my integrity.
-   I have gained a sense of smell and taste to where food, drink and natures pleasures are so much sweeter now a days since I do not have it masked by that horrendous odor.
-   I have gained my health. Now with this comes 2-fold as the exercise program that I am currently using (DDPYoga) was introduced to me by Sox2012 from the Sept 12 group. So before quitting I was on blood pressure meds with a BP 160/90 and during my first 100 days I put on close to 35 pounds getting close to 300, not my heaviest but was not in good shape. Well I have regained that, I no longer use the meds, BP is down to around 125/80, I am at less than 250 pounds, and feel like I am in the best physical shape of my life. So I would say that learning one thing here gave me the confidence to improve in this area.
-   I have gained a little bit of a bulging pocketbook. Yes the dollars saved, though may not have been as much as some others, it has lead me to treating myself to a few items as a reward.
-   I have gained time. Here is one that has also had a great impact. No more searching for more, running out to the store, or the time spent trying to get the next fix. But also the time spent away from my loved ones as I separated myself, even if mentally while in the same room. The time running to the bathroom to rid myself of it before eatingÂ….just amazing what recollecting a few minutes a day can do.
-   I have also gained the anywhere/anytime for those special moments with the wife, where she can kiss me whenever she wants.
-   And finally off the top of my head, I have gained the best friends and extended family a person could ask for. As yes, any here would reach out their hand to help support me in my quit, but when that extends to real life, where now I feel that I can go just about anywhere in the United States and have a meal, have a drink, or enjoy the company, now that is something special that I never expected. Where I can pick up the phone and call any one of many people just to talk, it truly a blessing.

So as you can see, some of the items on this list were on my list of initial reasons for quitting, but when you look back on it, there is the ability to gain so much more than you expect, and I am sure there are others that have more than what I have listed here.

[30isEnuff]

Sorry but a lot going through my mind lately but this one was going through my head as I was falling asleep last night:

"As you honor your word, life itself becomes much more precious"

not sure why I had this repeating but how true to me it is. I mean look at what we get back when we keep our daily word: food and drink tastes so much better, our health improves, we gain back time with our loved ones, we gain a little extra bulge in the wallet, and it has brought together a whole new family and friends.

Does it really get any better than that?

Good stuff SD.
I quit with You Today.

[SirDerek]

Sorry but a lot going through my mind lately but this one was going through my head as I was falling asleep last night:

"As you honor your word, life itself becomes much more precious"

not sure why I had this repeating but how true to me it is. I mean look at what we get back when we keep our daily word: food and drink tastes so much better, our health improves, we gain back time with our loved ones, we gain a little extra bulge in the wallet, and it has brought together a whole new family and friends.

Does it really get any better than that?

[SirDerek]

Going to pull on a little favorite of mine as I sit in my castle this evening with the campfire settling down from its initial roar. Those that know I am a boy scout leader and just feel this is a great time to have this one as yes it is for scouts but with only a couple of words replaced can really apply to what we do here.

So if you will join in (for those of you that may not know it, it is to the tune of "Oh Christmas tree"

Scout Vespers

Softly falls the light of day,
While our campfire fades away.
Silently each Scout should ask quitter
Have I done my daily task? did I post roll early this morning
Have I kept my honor bright? did I keep my word
Can I guiltless sleep tonight?
Have I done and have I dared
Everything to be prepared?is my quit plan in place


have a great evening everyone and make sure you hit that roll bright and early.