My quit and brotherhood
I understand that most vets out there support newbies fully and give graciously their advice and counsel. But those are not the one’s I am writing about now. I am writing about the small number who take glee in watching the new quitter struggle and egg them on and eventually get one or two that finally can’t take the crap being dealt and swing back unleashing a torrent of rage. I sure as hell hope the asses doing this are experts in addiction therapy, because while being extensively non-productive it is also dangerous. The mind of an addict, and here I preach to crowd, is filled with negative messages on a wide range of issues from self-esteem, self-hatred, fears of failure, and rejection. Most addicts become addicts not because they slide slowly into it, they are often filling a void where they perceive that they have no control over their lives, and addiction is a concrete way to have a perception control. We pledge every day in roll to not use that day, we are substituting our addiction with a new form of control and as we replace that we develop that control, the urge to use dangerous substances is lowered, but unfortunately it can never disappear. So we play games here and there, post silly shit, comfort others when they are down, get our anger out, share our successes in non-dipping forums and generally good natured ribbing. When we are in a rough spot, the true “brothers” spring into action; calling, pm’s, e-mails, and posting words of encouragement until the brother’s rough spot is past. This is most of the men and women here. There is another group here however that sees the site as a playground to push around early quitters and seeks to find the weakness and create situations where the new quitter just loses it. The very fact someone is here at shows there is weakness somewhere, no members, except perhaps for a special few, here have said “, I worked my quit all by myself, so now I’m going to invest myself and time in a support system.” It does not matter if a person is on Day 1 or Day 7,000 they are all quitters and none should be hazed or pushed into rage. I am making the decision to phone in roll for next week or so because I am actually afraid for my quit if I continue to see venom and deliberate attempts to ignite rage rather than dampen it. I am and will always remain quit, but when a support system leaves you, you need to step back and reevaluate things.
Curt (cdforecheck)