Thought I'd post an update, just in case anyone can benefit from my experience.
Wow.
Quitting dip is something else. Every single piece of me has been changed or effected one way or another since quitting, and I'm only on day 51. I think that most of us uncover the extent of our addictions only after we quit, and boy am I doing just that...
You see I'm 21 years old with a lot to learn. Dip was my lifeline, my go to, the one thing I needed to conquer any task. But was it? Think about it, is dip an all-powerful magic can full of dirt that is able to remove stress and problems? Does it make life more or less enjoyable? Can we drive without it? Does it make us appreciate what we have more or less? Or is it a complete hoax? A huge lie that tricks us into coming back for more and more? Depending where you are in your quit and how much of a strangle nicotine has on your brain will determine how you approach these answers.
Since I'm an addict who has since developed a level of perspective I'm going to give this a shot. Do you remember your first dip? I know I remember mine. My brother convinced my at the raw age of 16 to grab a pinch despite my objections. I remember this unsettling feelings. I knew damn well before I was a dipper that going down that road was a dead end full of problems. But as soon as I threw that dip in my mind went blank. Why? Because now nicotine controlled me. By throwing that dip in I was surrendering myself. Handing over the control...
Over the last 5 years I hardly attempted to regain that control. Why? Because I believed a series of lies that would have me do ANYTHING to please nicotine. Did nicotine honestly erase stress and the problems I was dealing with? Absolutely not. It never did. It had us doing anything in our power to feed it more and more and more. And so we did, too terrified to pull the plug. I remember visiting this site as an active addict. Joining KTC then was a heart warming thought. "It sure would be cool not to have to spend so much money on dip" I used to think. I'd think that until it was time to once again plug my mouth full of cancer in order to get my fix. Over and over again this routine played itself out.
So, let me ask you all, do you miss it? Do you miss nicotine calling the shots? Quitting might involve a lot of suck, but at least you have the balls to do it on your own.
To any current addict who may be reading this...Quit. Please. Don't let nicotine convince you that our situations are any different. Don't let nicotine convince you that "another day" or "another week" will leave you more prepared. It won't. Join the brotherhood, embrace the suck, take back your life. It's worth it. It's worth every bit of struggle.
