How will you remember Tuesday, January 20, 2009?
IÂ’m sure most of you started out the day like any other; rushing to get that morning ritual done before work. Knowing today was going to be different since history for the first time was in the making! Yet I was utterly clueless to what todayÂ’s history lesson for me I'd face. First let me assure you that it had absolutely nothing to do with or about our 44th President, Barack Obama being sworn in as our Commander and Chief.
It was actually going to come down to little ‘ole history lesson and me. It seems I only have horrific news to share with you which leads me to not share it at all. I mean blah, blah, blah what’s the sense of hearing someone’s woes? All negative without a grain of something positive makes for a huge case of DRAMA. And who wants to read such chaos of life; especially when it has to deal with someone else. Everyone endures such times. Don’t get me wrong I am grateful for everything I have but it would seem nice not have such constant misfortunes, you know? Think positive, Nickie! Positive!
Anyways, I was in the hospital for a week with pneumonia and my hematologist caught a blood clot within my leg while I was there – low potassium and magnesium. Umm, ever have needles around your belly button? Let’s say it’s a not a walk in the park. It’s shots of heparin to thin my blood in order to dissolve the clot. Then the antibiotics that I was receiving I had an allergic reaction to. (nice rash) It took two attempts but finally there was one that I could use without having to play connect the dots. (small joke – I’ll letcha laugh!) I went in on Monday, Jan 12th and was released Friday the 16th.
The school never sent flowers so I felt that was somewhat strange. However, Friday late afternoon I did received flowers at the hospital after I was discharged. The florist arranged to deliver them to my house. Hmm, 3 carnations – card read: Everglades Elementary. Very impersonal I thought but hell, I was happy to receive something. Better than nothing, right? ”Get well soon“, to me, seemed logical since I was in the hospital, oh well! I’ll hush. Flowers are flowers. Monday, school was out! And I had kept in touch either by Paul or myself calling so they knew I would be returning Tuesday the 20th.
Now back to the historic event, mine before President ObamaÂ’s.
As soon as I walked into my clinic my desk had been rearranged to fit whoever had felt the need to rearrange it. My children as normal came into the clinic before the bell rings. No sooner had I placed my purse and laptop down I was asked to see the Principal in her office. I assumed the same formality of Dr. Note to return back to work and the usual how are you feeling? I stepped into her office as she closed the door. Ok, this isn’t good. A piece of paper was placed in front of me to read with an, “I’m sorry.”
Just for humor this is the letter I was greeted to after having a clot which might not have been dissolved either entering a lung or my brain. (which school was aware of my condition)
January 20, 2009
Dear Nicole Lynch,
In order to better meet the needs of (School Name) and the students that we serve, I have recommended that your employment be terminated effective today, January 20, 2009. I anticipate that this will be formally approved by the school board at the February Meeting.
I wish you the best in all of your future endeavors.
Sincerely,
My Principal Signature
Her Title
cc: Superintendent of Schools
cc: Personnel File of Nicole Lynch
She said sorry about 3 more times and then I had to go into my office during school hours and remove my personal belongings. I used a lot of my own money to purchase Dental and Hygiene Awareness displays. I asked if I could come back because neither staff nor students knew of my termination and at first she stated it was ok but within a few minutes she felt it was better for me to go ahead and get my belongings while I was there. It took me and the principal close to 2 hours to pack everything into my van. I even took my bookcase that was about to fall apart but I took it. I brought it into that facility and I was taking it back.
I felt betrayed. I wasnÂ’t given an explanation as to why. An explanation wasnÂ’t needed since in within their policy the school board has an allotted window and it happens that itÂ’s a 3 year time slot. So for 3 years anyone working for them can be let go without warning and/or without a reason for their termination. I felt humiliated. I take my job very seriously. Last year human resources found out that I was seen at a psychiatric hospital for my bipolar disorder and they have been giving me an extremely harsh time about it. (My husband told them the 3 days I was there; not thinking.) I was a voluntary checked in for mostly talk therapy since there isnÂ’t any available near me. Huge mistake, I now know, since government facilities basically take mental patients off the streets and provide them only their prescription medications. If only I had known. I never would have admitted myself. I had the meds just not the treatment. What a waste of time and now a waste of a job. The union I am with can do very little since the 3 year time slot. But they are still working on it. I know it has to do with my bipolar. I had no problems up until then. Teachers take just as many days if not more for medical or personal. Is it my fault my position requires someone with training (CPR/First Aid) requiring higher pay to sub for me than a normal teaching sub? I never complained even when I didnÂ’t receive my lunch or 15 minute breaks. I did my job.
I feel like such a failure. Can I not do anything right? What the hell is wrong with me? I wanted a dip today. Yes, I wanted one. Just to say FUCK YOU world. I called ODT. I told him what does it matter if I just say to hell with it? What does it really matter?
I see absolutely no strength within me. I see weakness. I see someone who all her life has been put down. How can I look my children in the face and let them know that it’ll be alright when I am uncertain of the future. I feel so very low. I feel like I do more harm than good. Just once I wish something good could evolve from something bad. And I wish dip wouldn’t be such a factor when I’m down. I live and breathe and I know its better without Copenhagen. I want others to look up to me and say “Hey, look she’s doing it so can I.”
But what happens when you are at your lowest ebb?
The more you struggle, ..... the quicker that tide pulls you out ...... the less you see your tranquility within that white sandy beach.
Then what? Why make a little bit of history of your own? ...................... Stay quit!
IÂ’m looking forward to the warmth of the beach between my toes and a cool margarita! Copenhagen for now will just have to wait! Maybe, just maybe I have a little bit of fight left in me. A little bit of strength to keep moving! A little bit of history left in the making .......................
-mls
**I didn't falter ODT, Timmay and Beav, my big brothers .... I didn't falter! - - I hope you're proud!**
