Good morning fellow quitters! Now I'm not much of a "feelings" guy. Not saying that because I'm proud of it. It's just a fact due to my job. I internalize and that probably helped rage my tobacco addiction. However, I digress... Guys, last night that nicbitch snuck into my slumber and delivered a kick to the sack I will never forget. Here's my dream in a nut shell:
I just got home from work and dropped my bag at the front door. Let the dogs out back and then headed to the bedroom. There I found my wife sitting on the bed smiling at me. I walked over and embraced her. Started kissing her on the neck and that's when she said the words that ripped me right out of my sleep.... "I can smell the dip in your mouth." Bamn. Good morning day 9.
Now at face value it doesn't seem like much, so here's the backstory... Guys, I'm not married. Never have been. The girl in the dream was the "one that got away". I truly loved her but in the end she stood between me and the can. I was too fucking addicted and impatient to give quitting an honest shot and to work on the relationship and make something of it. She didn't understand the addiction like you guys do. To her it was just some junk I put in my mouth and something I could just stop without any issue. Isn't that kind of naïve thinking beautiful? Seriously, to not know what this is like is bliss.
That dream cut deep and really hurt brothers. After some thought though I've realized the dream was a mistake on the nicbitch's part. There's a fire in me now and I'm raging today fellas. Boy am I fucking raging. Not because I want a pinch but because I want to give back every pinch I've had with a fist to the nicbitch's face and a smile that says FUCK YOU BITCH! Today is day 9, and the day is mine! I quit today with all you assholes and there's nothing else I'd rather do!! Thanks for the support and stay strong. We will beat this bitch!!!