I'm dying here

[FMBM707]

Well Raider, after 22 years of honorable service, I'd like to say yes. However, I think my word is good to others, I feel like I have to question keeping my word to myself though. I have always taken pride in being forthright and of good moral stature, and I would never go against my word to another. But I really wonder if I could keep a faithful stand to myself. That seems to be my issue. I guess I've grown to not care enough about myself, only for others.

Then post roll and make that promise to us that you'll be nicotine free for 24 hours. The next day wake up, piss, post that promise that you will be nicotine free, then do it again. I think you'll find if you get over the initial hump you are going to start enjoying the freedom of being quit.

You have to take that first step. Make that promise for one day and keep that promise, then do it again. One day at a time and do this! YOU CAN DO THIS IF YOU WANT TO DO THIS!

Lot of support in here for you- you aren't alone in this quit.

Quit with you if you want it!

[ForMyFamily]

Well Raider, after 22 years of honorable service, I'd like to say yes. However, I think my word is good to others, I feel like I have to question keeping my word to myself though. I have always taken pride in being forthright and of good moral stature, and I would never go against my word to another. But I really wonder if I could keep a faithful stand to myself. That seems to be my issue. I guess I've grown to not care enough about myself, only for others.

[Cindy]

That's where I get hung up. I throw this one out, then, when the stress of the day comes on, the store is right there. So I struggle with "why throw it out in the first place?" Am I not too far gone already? Is my death bed laid already? I have PTSD, TBI, Multiple disorders of muscle and joint damage from combat, God know's what kind of depleted uranium poisoning...I don't know how to make myself do anything anymore. I have 4 kids and a granddaughter that I know deserve to have me quit and I beat myself up daily for not quitting...you'd think that would be enough. What the hell is wrong with me?

The stress is worsened by your addiction. You're an addict. That's what's wrong with you and me too. I have been treated for severe anxiety, depression and suspected PTSD from an abusive relationship I was in. I'm not saying that's the same as your PTSD I'm just saying. I had been putting off quitting for years. I thought " if I am this stressed out and miserable now, what in the HELL will happen if I quit dipping!?" Well last Monday I came here and I quit. I had been dipping for about 17 years. I was up to two cans per day. And I just quit. And after about a week you may still have cravings but I can almost guarantee you that you will feel better. You will be less stressed out and you will feel more normal. I was literally terrified to quit. But I am so glad I did. I am 32 and I felt like I was dying. Like my body was just slowly shutting down. I never realized how much the nicotine affected me because I had never quit. Now I am mad as hell that I wasted so many years feeling like shit because of some crap I put in my mouth.

[Jubs]

Live Chat, now.

[Raider]

Can you be a Man of your word?

[ForMyFamily]

Thank you Raider. You as well.

[ForMyFamily]

I want to quit to help me live to see my 3 daughters get married, and to see my next grandchild be born, and to be there for my wife the first day of our retirement. I JUST CANT STOP BUYING AND COMING UP WITH DAMN EXCUSES! I appreciate your words and willingness to help. I just fear my resolve is not enough to see it through. I can't think of any other way to explain it. I was an Infantryman for 22 years. I have been in more firefights than I'd like to remember. I have lived through pains that most people world never experience...but I can't bring my worthless ass to drop a stupid habit?? Who am I kidding?!

[Raider]

By the way. Thank you for your service!!!!

[Raider]

We have a shitload of vets (military vets) on here. I too am a vet. 13 years Air Force. The military created a dipping raider. Actually, that's bullshit. I created that myself. This is hard work, quitting that is. You have to really want it for yourself and nobody else. They (the family) will benefit from you quitting.

My question for you is Why do you want to quit? Do YOU really want to quit? If so, you came to the right place.

This place is built on brotherhood and accountability. That is what has kept me from dipping for 221 days and it will keep me from dipping tomorrow.

[Raider]

I guess I don't get what poof means...

poof is what we write when our post doesn't sound like we want it to. Basically Poof and the post is gone.

[ForMyFamily]

Ok

[FMBM707]

That's where I get hung up. I throw this one out, then, when the stress of the day comes on, the store is right there. So I struggle with "why throw it out in the first place?" Am I not too far gone already? Is my death bed laid already? I have PTSD, TBI, Multiple disorders of muscle and joint damage from combat, God know's what kind of depleted uranium poisoning...I don't know how to make myself do anything anymore. I have 4 kids and a granddaughter that I know deserve to have me quit and I beat myself up daily for not quitting...you'd think that would be enough. What the hell is wrong with me?

I got a guy on here that can probably relate to what you just posted. I'm gonna hit him up and tell him to jump on here.

[FMBM707]

Poof

[ForMyFamily]

That's where I get hung up. I throw this one out, then, when the stress of the day comes on, the store is right there. So I struggle with "why throw it out in the first place?" Am I not too far gone already? Is my death bed laid already? I have PTSD, TBI, Multiple disorders of muscle and joint damage from combat, God know's what kind of depleted uranium poisoning...I don't know how to make myself do anything anymore. I have 4 kids and a granddaughter that I know deserve to have me quit and I beat myself up daily for not quitting...you'd think that would be enough. What the hell is wrong with me?

[Raider]

I didn't have a chew for like 4 days. Then the wife and I got into a argument and just like that, I ran to get a can. Now I'm back at square one, still sitting here with a can, hoping like hell she doesn't figure out that I started again, and wishing I didn't. Any advise for that?

Yep, DUMP IT IN THE CRAPPER AND FLUSH IT.

I did the same thing as you did a long time ago. I used nicotine to make me feel better. It didn't. The nic bitch is crafty and will tempt you every chance she can get. Get some fake stuff (Smokey Mountain) to help with the initial phases. Seeds, Atomic fireballs, gum, whatever. Just flush the dip and be quit. BUT you gotta do it for YOU and only YOU. You are gonna be a prick for a bit. That's why she needs to read through the spousal support section.