3rd, 4th, 5th times the charm

[Bean]

GREAT JOB!!! Failing that test was a "set-back." But, mouth, throat and jaw cancer is a death sentence.

Keep posting roll each day. And keep us posted on the PE Exam.

You can do this...the test and quitting. You're gonna make it, bro. Stay strong and stay quit!

[PackMan]

I was attempting to use my intro thread as some what of a journal and of course life gets in the way and I haven't posted in here for a while.

1.) I think people that have been on this site for 50 days or so understand this, but maybe the "younger" ones don't. This website and group of people and supporters is truly amazing. I am on day 58 now, and would not have made it past day 3 without the accountability and support provided by members here.

2.) it is amazing that at day 58 I am still having craves and foggy times. After dinner; playing PS3; New Years; hungover; opening presents...the list keeps gong. Maybe one day that will end and I will be able to do these things without thinking about the nic bitch. Again, this website and the supportive members keep me straight. I posted roll, and I'll be damned if I will break that promise.

3.) about 11 years ago I started on a journey to finish school and get where I wanted to be career wise. I had flunked out of college the first go round and was working full time as a drafter. I knew it wasn't what I wanted but I worked with wonderful people and with their help and my wife's help and motivation I started back to school part time. I spent the next 3-4 years taking classes at the local tech school and jucos. Finally after I had taken all the classes offered that would go towards my degree, I resigned from work, sold my house, moved my wife and new son in with my parents, and I started full time at a university about 2.5 hours from home. During the week I lived in an apartment, and traveled home on the weekends to see my family. I completed 96 hours in two years and one summer and graduated with my BS is Civil Engineering. The first part of my journey was over. I got a job and me and the family moved and started this part of our lives.

Once you have your B.S. you then work 4 years and you can take your PE exam, when you pass that you are considered a professional Engineer.

So I reached my 4 years in may of 2012. I began studying for this 8 hour monster exam. I was early to work every day to study; studied on the weekends; studied while my family went on vacation etc...

Took the test in October 2012. Left the test center feeling great. KNEW I had passed it. This would mean an end to my journey. It would mean a raise at work, new job offers, more money, etc etc. it takes 6-8 weeks to grade the nation wide exam.

December 13 I found out that I had failed. I had to leave the office as I was quite upset and I drove to the gas station. I bought a coke and a ............pack of seeds. I didn't cave! I manned up grabbed my balls and went on with life. Shortly after, I called the state, signed back up and started studying again. I take the test again in April 2013.

My point being, that when life sucks, and shit doesn't go your way, you CAN stay quit.

[jbuilder7916]

Awesome. I am on day 26 and actually saw my first dip-free movie yesterday. However, it was a family movie with my kids called "wreck it ralph". I was sucking on some popcorn 'Popcorn' but it was another first. My other first yesterday was putting up Christmas lights without a chew. Imagine -- no more long streams of dip flying from the roof!!

I quit with you my Feb brother

[PackMan]

A Big First last night.

Had to go watch that vampire breaking dawn movie last night.

First movie I've been to in 15 years without a dip.

Just wanted to share!

[PackMan]

Another day on the quit train.

Can't believe I have made it 16 days. I do believe this is the longest I have been quit.

Things continue to get better. Was out last night to get dinner and walked past a smoke shop, the smell of tobacco permeating the air. I just kept my head straight and walked right on by, feeling sorry for the people rushing in to get their fix before closing time. That used to be me.

Now I am quit with dip, I'm back in the gym in the early morn, now I just need to quit snacking in place of dipping at night.

Any ideas? The nay one I got is to go to sleep early.

[Diesel2112]

Day 12

My wife and I have always had a great relationship and especially the last 4 or 5 years we have really had the communication lines going good.

So I am talking with my wife last night abut our quits and she asked ow I was doing. I told her things were ok, using seeds to get through the day, blah blah blah. She asked how often I was dipping before I quit...blah blah blah.

Turns out that she had no idea that I was dipping pretty much all day long. She figured I had one or two during the day and a couple at night. So I went on to explain to her that I had a schedule; I would have one from 6:30 till about 9, then a cup of coffee; then I would have one from 9:30 till about 11:30 or so, then eat lunch; then I would put in a huge fatty at 1:00 and it would last till about 2:30; then I would throw in another soon after to last me til about 5:15. At that point I would go home, eat dinner, put in another pinch, do homework with kids, take it out, refresh, put a new one in about 7:45 til 9, then I would purposefully take that one out just so I could get a fresh dip in at 9:30 that would last me til bedtime.

She was blown away. She had no fucking idea. And honestly until I just typed all of that shit out, I never realized just how bad it had gotten.

I ninjaed for 15 years, when I finally came clean to the wife she wanted to know ALL THE DETAILS. Shit, when I went over a typical day she was stunned, and so was I to be honest. I was a two can a day guy but never left it in for more than 15-20 minutes, so that was a lot of dip poppin. She was a little bothered by the fact that I wasn't just being a "nice guy" every night when I would go out every night and run whatever errends needed to be run. Hell I even admitted to her that on more than one occasion I would pour out a 1/2 gallon of milk just to claim we were out and the kids would have none for breakfast, so I needed to run out at 11PM and get more. What a fucking idiot I was.

Lucky for me my wife did not get pissed. She actually felt bad for me and knew that I was ADDICTED and wanted to help me quit. Very easily she could have been pissed at me for living such a lie. I honestly can't say I would have reacted the same had the roles been reversed.

I'm so lucky to have her, so lucky she helped me out so much and never once threw it in my face, so lucky I'm not fucking dead or have half a face. Fuck what an idiot I was.

NEVER again...

[GR8WHITEBUFFALO]

That's good work right there. Putting it in writing sure does make it hit home. I lived in denial everyday when I was chewing. Saying things to myself like: "I don't really chew that much compared to other guys I know who chew." "My gums don't look that bad." " I will start to cut back after I finish the tins I have already paid for so they don't go to waste." "My teeth don't look too yellow."

All a bunch of lies to keep my addiction going.

Keep up the great work.

[PackMan]

Day 12

My wife and I have always had a great relationship and especially the last 4 or 5 years we have really had the communication lines going good.

So I am talking with my wife last night abut our quits and she asked ow I was doing. I told her things were ok, using seeds to get through the day, blah blah blah. She asked how often I was dipping before I quit...blah blah blah.

Turns out that she had no idea that I was dipping pretty much all day long. She figured I had one or two during the day and a couple at night. So I went on to explain to her that I had a schedule; I would have one from 6:30 till about 9, then a cup of coffee; then I would have one from 9:30 till about 11:30 or so, then eat lunch; then I would put in a huge fatty at 1:00 and it would last till about 2:30; then I would throw in another soon after to last me til about 5:15. At that point I would go home, eat dinner, put in another pinch, do homework with kids, take it out, refresh, put a new one in about 7:45 til 9, then I would purposefully take that one out just so I could get a fresh dip in at 9:30 that would last me til bedtime.

She was blown away. She had no fucking idea. And honestly until I just typed all of that shit out, I never realized just how bad it had gotten.

[PackMan]

I'm on my 9th day and things are getting better. My mouth is healing awesome. Taste buds seem to be returning.

Still craving a little. Nothing big, just certain times of day. First thing in the morning, after lunch, after dinner, the usual.

My irritability is decreasing and I am starting to sleep better again.

Now I gotta keep my second promise to myself to lose some weight. I am starting at the gym n the morning. I would like to lose about 15 pounds by Xmas.

I gotta weigh tonight, but I'm thinking I'm about 275. My final goal is to be at 225 by summer.

[PackMan]

Actually watched some of that yesterday. Not very good.

You need to watch insidious.

[wastepanel]

Yesterday was a rough and long day at work. Seemed like it went on for weeks.

As an engineer, I spend a lot of time in front of a computer or in an office. So I have always been able to dip to pass the time. That is the main difference in dipping and smoking, and why dipping is so much worse. With smoking, you got to stop at some point and go inside and work. With dipping, I have been able to dip all day long, almost anywhere.

This is day 5 of my quit and it is getting easier. I really have no doubt about whether I can do this. It all comes down to doing it for myself. This is the first time I have quit because I wanted too!

I can and will do this...bring it the fuck on weekend.

Good for you man.

When times are rough, try to reach out if you can. Find some way to distract yourself from those moments. You can do this man.

How's your wife doing with her quit? We have a sister site to this one (that just got started) called whackthepack.com. It uses the same program you use here, but is more geared towards smokers. Its traffic is not as heavy as this site's, but many of the quitter's here have had to quit both nicotine vehicles so they belong over there as well.

BTW...I saw "Halloween: Curse of Michael Myers" on Netflix and realized I haven't seen that since I was kid. There was a reason. Color me surprised though that Paul Rudd was in it.

[PackMan]

Yesterday was a rough and long day at work. Seemed like it went on for weeks.

As an engineer, I spend a lot of time in front of a computer or in an office. So I have always been able to dip to pass the time. That is the main difference in dipping and smoking, and why dipping is so much worse. With smoking, you got to stop at some point and go inside and work. With dipping, I have been able to dip all day long, almost anywhere.

This is day 5 of my quit and it is getting easier. I really have no doubt about whether I can do this. It all comes down to doing it for myself. This is the first time I have quit because I wanted too!

I can and will do this...bring it the fuck on weekend.

[GR8WHITEBUFFALO]

Nice. Tell everyone that will listen that you quit. It will only strenthen your quit. I tell everyone the truth. I am addicted to nicotine and it cannot and will not be a part of my life anymore. I pitty the people who are still slaves to the nic bitch but that is their own personal journey. I choose a different road.

[PackMan]

Long day at work is finally over. Had a small blessing this evening. Stopped by my "usual" c-store to get a coke. The cashier that I have been buying dip from for years was working. Before I could tell her no thanks, (I thought she was going to offer me my usual) she told me how proud and happy she was for me.

I had totally forgotten that i had told her on Sunday that that would be my last day, and she remembered.

[Bruce]

My wife is quitting smoking at the same time so we were butting heads last night... 

Can I interest you in a reality TV show?

But seriously, excellent choice on the quit. For me (I'm just starting out here at 50 days), I still find it helpful to remember the first few-five-six days of my quit.

All the swirling vivid colors, the cozy fog, the mind-bending headaches, the chills, and the amazing strength of my clenched jaw as I rode through yet another crave. Remember this stuff.

So that you don't start up that shit again.

Happy to quit with you today.

Dr. Dirt

'Crazy' 'arse' 'Crazy'

Pack, I'm currently textin daily a married couple who quit together as well. They're huge support for each other, its awesome. They're also less then 2 weeks away from 100 days, yall can do it too