This is not exactly a response to your specific situation but I thought it worth sharing. Take what you need......
Diffusing the Nic BitchÂ’s narrative
You will likely hear whispers from the Nic Bitch. The Nic Bitch is ONLY effective if you do not understand HER. Knowledge crushes HER.
Realize the whispers in your head are not “you”. It is your addiction speaking - the nic bitch. She will disguise herself as “you” because she understands “you” are the decision maker, not her. The only way she gets her hit of nicotine is if she can convince “you”, it is a great idea to plan, obtain, and ingest nicotine. She has no choices available to her.
ONLY YOU HAVE THE POWER OF CHOICE.
The nic bitch must fool you to get nicotine. Therefore, she is cunning. Her whispers will sound like “you”. She will create the illusion that it is your voice speaking. She will exploit. She knows your weaknesses. So, think about your weaknesses and recognize them. She knows if you like to celebrate with nic, drink with nic, drive, mow, relieve stress…whatever. In summary, she is an addiction cloaked as a person.
Next time she whispers, you will understand it is the nic bitch and not you that came up with whatever hair-brained scheme that just floated through your mind. Some stupid internal conversation. Talk back to her and diffuse her narrative. “Yea, bitch, I just heard you. I know it is you and not me that wants nicotine today. I made a promise not to use nicotine today, so fuck you.” Then punch her in the face. [/QUOTE]
That's some words of wisdom shit right there! Sporting some quit wood now!