Hey nab! Welcome to the site, and congratulations on acting on a VERY good idea. It's time to quit.
It seems like you really resent nicotine and tobacco, and that's great. But one thing you want to be mindful of going forward is this notion that nicotine makes problems go away, or makes the world easier to deal with. It's something that even I have to remind myself to be mindful of, even 187 days in. Your addiction WILL try to convince you that dip is a cure-all, and you've got to be prepared to face that when it happens. You'll see this quote a thousand times during your time here on KTC. "Nicotine + a problem = 2 problems."
Believe me man, we ALL have thought of nicotine as being therapeutic when we were using. The cruel lie of nicotine addiction is that it casts the illusion of being a stress-reliever. Well, yes, nicotine does reduce ONE kind of stress...the stress of having low nicotine levels while you're addicted. You see, it isn't that a pinch of dip is helping you deal with problems or that the ACTUAL problem was even that bad to begin with, it's that you have a nicotine addiction to feed on TOP of whatever problem is going on in your life. And a nicotine addiction, if not fed, can cause stress and anxiety. Thus, we as addicts would associate dip with making things better, more manageable, or more enjoyable. Of COURSE fishing is more fun when you aren't jonesing for your nic fix. Of COURSE the movie is better when you're not mad enough to kill because your nic levels are low.
Thus...nicotine + a problem = 2 problems.
The good news is that there is a better way, and that's cold turkey quitting, which you so wisely have chosen to undertake! Yeah, you might be pissy, or anxious, or stressed for a while. But brother, having made it through those early days, I can tell you that it's one of the best things, if not THE single best things you'll do for yourself. And you'll find out that not only can activities be as enjoyable as they used to be with dip, they'll be MORE enjoyable because you won't be wondering when you can sneak in a dip.
Quit with you today!
- Invader