Here we go again

[THansen2413]

Complacent quits = Bad quits

I'm not real sure how to start this off, so I'll just start typing from the cuff...

I had a pretty big setback in my quit this week. On Monday night, with work off Tuesday, I decided to pick up a fifth of Fireball Whiskey. I didn't have any limit set in stone to how much I would drink, so one chug, turned into 4, and that turned into me finishing off the fifth over the course of a late afternoon/evening/night. I stayed up until probably 3 am that night. Listening to music, looking at old pictures, and sulking over things that I either, A) could control, or B) couldn't control. Either way, getting drunk off my ass, alone in my bedroom, wasn't going to fix either of those options. I woke up the next morning, and as one of my close quit buddies put it, "wagged the dogs tail." I started drinking about 11 am, and it carried on throughout the day again. This time, a fifth of vodka over the late morning/afternoon/evening.

Tuesday was a bad day. I posted roll, but in my drunken, depressive state I went out and bought a can of poison. I was no doubt going to dip that night. I had made my mind up. I was willing to throw away 480 odd days of being quit, betray my quit brothers, and as I put it "come back better and stronger". It pains me to type those words even today. I guess luckily for me, as most drunks are, they like to text and or talk. Look for attention as sick as it may be. I sent a text out to my 10 quit friends.....no, my quit brothers and it read, "I'm fucking up guys". Luck was in my corner as one of them called me not more than 2 minutes later. I came clean to him that I had bought a can, and was romanticizing dip and nicotine. He gave me a loving, hard nosed talk and put his chips on the table with me. He made me flush my unopened can, and then proceeded to relay to the group that I had bought a can, and everyone should call me. They did just that. I took a few calls from different brothers and they reiterated what a bad choice this would be. That led to a conference call with all of us on the line. I listened, and honestly only remember chunks of that call but what I got was sheer concern, and brotherly advice. After I got off the phone, I continued to text with them. Looking back on those texts I sent, pained me. I was disrespectful to a few of them. Said things I wouldn't have said even on my worst day sober. I then proceeded to jump on chat and talk with the people who were on there. Again, and I'm sorry, I only remember fragments of that time spent on chat. What I'm most sorry about with chat, is I drew the attention away from new quitters. Quitters who were struggling in their first week, first month. For those who reached out to me that night, I know SirNope and Nolaq were on the forefront, thank you.

It's taken me 3 days to get back to feeling "normal" from my alcohol binge. Alcohol is a real bitch. It's left me unmotivated and apathetic for the 3 days. So for 3 days I've been picking up the pieces from my choices I made.

So why share this story with all of you? Some I know, some I don't. Because complacent quits will bite your ass every damn time. I learned today, one of those brothers who I talked with on the phone Wednesday, lost his 100% posting status yesterday. You can say, "Well, he should have double checked or reached out if he had doubts on his roll call." To which I respond, "Maybe, but we are our brothers keepers". Roll post is great. This site is great. But at the end of the day, if you don't have a connection on a deeper level, a bond if you will, with your quit brothers you are absolutely going to fail. I posted roll that morning, I bounced around on here that day, but even in doing those two things I was going to dip. What good are you doing posting your name on that line, if you aren't promising it and connecting to someone you sincerely care about? Someone who is going to go into battle with you.

So for myself, less than 20 days from 500 days quit, it's time to get back to the basics. It's time to connect with someone who is struggling, or someone who just quit. It's a reminder to myself also, that you're never cured from this addiction. It's always going to rear it's filthy head when you're at your lowest point or your judgment is impaired. I forgot for two days why I quit in the first place. I did something I said I'd never do again. I bought a can and donated $7 to UST. I'm so thankful and grateful, I didn't break my ultimate promise. My promise to never dip again. NAFAR.

Stay strong, reach out, make friendships, and stay quit. It's the only option we have in our lives as addicts.

[rdad]

Just wanted to share something with the community here.

Last night I went out with some friends to a local bar. It was within walking distance so I gleefully tagged along. Sipping, chugging, and sipping some more alcoholic beverages as the night progressed. Judgement was impaired, but I wasn't shitfaced. Legally drunk, yes, drunk and sloppy, no. Anyway, I'm sitting at a table with 2 other friends and a another friend comes up to our table and starts talking. He had saw that I recently surpassed 400 days quit and was kind of joking about it. He's a major addict, both nic and alcohol so I didn't think much of it. Next thing I know he takes out his can of poison and puts one in, closes the lid, and starts to pass it my way and offers me one. Of course, quit tools kicked in and i just laughed it off and told him to get that fucking thing out of my face. Which he did.

Point of this is this, to someone who's 400+ days in, this is a minor speed bump, a minor reminder. To those who just quit, this could have been a cave. This is why we preach to be aware of alcohol early on, and your surroundings. The bitch is always working through mysterious ways to get back into your life. Are you gonna tell her to take a cab? Or come on in for dessert?

Offer once, I say no. Offer twice I dump his can on the ground and stomp on it.

Nice job Tyler. People can be real assholes.

Thanks for that Thansen. What would have done us in early on is an easy Fuck Off at +400 days from all we have learned here.

[Raider]

Just wanted to share something with the community here.

Last night I went out with some friends to a local bar. It was within walking distance so I gleefully tagged along. Sipping, chugging, and sipping some more alcoholic beverages as the night progressed. Judgement was impaired, but I wasn't shitfaced. Legally drunk, yes, drunk and sloppy, no. Anyway, I'm sitting at a table with 2 other friends and a another friend comes up to our table and starts talking. He had saw that I recently surpassed 400 days quit and was kind of joking about it. He's a major addict, both nic and alcohol so I didn't think much of it. Next thing I know he takes out his can of poison and puts one in, closes the lid, and starts to pass it my way and offers me one. Of course, quit tools kicked in and i just laughed it off and told him to get that fucking thing out of my face. Which he did.

Point of this is this, to someone who's 400+ days in, this is a minor speed bump, a minor reminder. To those who just quit, this could have been a cave. This is why we preach to be aware of alcohol early on, and your surroundings. The bitch is always working through mysterious ways to get back into your life. Are you gonna tell her to take a cab? Or come on in for dessert?

Offer once, I say no. Offer twice I dump his can on the ground and stomp on it.

Nice job Tyler. People can be real assholes.

[THansen2413]

Just wanted to share something with the community here.

Last night I went out with some friends to a local bar. It was within walking distance so I gleefully tagged along. Sipping, chugging, and sipping some more alcoholic beverages as the night progressed. Judgement was impaired, but I wasn't shitfaced. Legally drunk, yes, drunk and sloppy, no. Anyway, I'm sitting at a table with 2 other friends and a another friend comes up to our table and starts talking. He had saw that I recently surpassed 400 days quit and was kind of joking about it. He's a major addict, both nic and alcohol so I didn't think much of it. Next thing I know he takes out his can of poison and puts one in, closes the lid, and starts to pass it my way and offers me one. Of course, quit tools kicked in and i just laughed it off and told him to get that fucking thing out of my face. Which he did.

Point of this is this, to someone who's 400+ days in, this is a minor speed bump, a minor reminder. To those who just quit, this could have been a cave. This is why we preach to be aware of alcohol early on, and your surroundings. The bitch is always working through mysterious ways to get back into your life. Are you gonna tell her to take a cab? Or come on in for dessert?

[THansen2413]

My family got involved with Relay For Life 12 years ago. This has become a near and dear organization to us as my Mom has lived with incurable Non Hodgkins Lymphoma for the last 12 years. For those unfamiliar with Relay For Life, it can best be summed up as an all night walk, fundraiser that helps those who are currently going through Chemo treatments, cancer research, and raising awareness to this awful disease.

How and where do the proceeds go? Donations are made to Team Members (I'm on my Mom's team) and 100% of the donations stay local. For me, that means they stay in Southeast Minnesota. I live about 45 min from Rochester, home of the Mayo Clinic. So this has a real impact on not only local fighters, but national cancer patients as well. Donations will be used locally for gas cards for those traveling to treatments, wigs for those who have lost their hair, gift cards for food, and of course the bulk going to cancer research locally.

How can you donate? Donations can be sent to me, with funds being made out to The American Cancer society. It's not a competition per say, but more of a friendly rivalry between the local teams. Last year, our county raised $100,000 between the 20 some teams!

Options for donations.

1. A straight monetary donation.

2. Luminaries - $10 a piece or 3/$25 these are white bags that line the walking track with either a survivors name, or the name of someone who lost the battle. They all have a candle in them and when the sun goes down, they are lit. I get emotional every time I see those bags lit.

3. Cancer Fact Signs - These are signs that line the track. They have great cancer facts, detection warnings, helpful advice etc professionally printed on them. As well as your name, or business organization on the bottom. Great way to advertise a business while spreading knowledge on this terrible disease. Prices are 1 sign = $100 3 signs = $250 6 signs = $400

4. T-Shirt Sponsorship - Every team member gets a shirt automatically. Close to 1500 people. This option would allow your company logo and name to be printed on the back of EVERY SHIRT. You aren't purchasing shirts to people, you're purchasing a sponsorship on the shirt with your donation going to The American Cancer Society.


I have decided that I'm setting a lofty, but very achievable goal. If I can raise $1,500 from all of you badasses on here, I will shave my head to honor cancer patients. Please share this within your groups if you feel compelled. All inquires can be PM'd to myself and I will give you an address to send donations. If my goal is achieved, photo proof will be sent to Kill The Can Facebook page, and killthecan.org. Thanks so much for reading and considering this. Any amount will help!

Thanks for reading and considering. Now shoot me a PM or ignore, and let's get back to helping the new quitters!

[THansen2413]

My family got involved with Relay For Life 12 years ago. This has become a near and dear organization to us as my Mom has lived with incurable Non Hodgkins Lymphoma for the last 12 years. For those unfamiliar with Relay For Life, it can best be summed up as an all night walk, fundraiser that helps those who are currently going through Chemo treatments, cancer research, and raising awareness to this awful disease.

How and where do the proceeds go? Donations are made to Team Members (I'm on my Mom's team) and 100% of the donations stay local. For me, that means they stay in Southeast Minnesota. I live about 45 min from Rochester, home of the Mayo Clinic. So this has a real impact on not only local fighters, but national cancer patients as well. Donations will be used locally for gas cards for those traveling to treatments, wigs for those who have lost their hair, gift cards for food, and of course the bulk going to cancer research locally.

How can you donate? Donations can be sent to me, with funds being made out to The American Cancer society. It's not a competition per say, but more of a friendly rivalry between the local teams. Last year, our county raised $100,000 between the 20 some teams!

Options for donations.

1. A straight monetary donation.

2. Luminaries - $10 a piece or 3/$25 these are white bags that line the walking track with either a survivors name, or the name of someone who lost the battle. They all have a candle in them and when the sun goes down, they are lit. I get emotional every time I see those bags lit.

3. Cancer Fact Signs - These are signs that line the track. They have great cancer facts, detection warnings, helpful advice etc professionally printed on them. As well as your name, or business organization on the bottom. Great way to advertise a business while spreading knowledge on this terrible disease. Prices are 1 sign = $100 3 signs = $250 6 signs = $400

4. T-Shirt Sponsorship - Every team member gets a shirt automatically. Close to 1500 people. This option would allow your company logo and name to be printed on the back of EVERY SHIRT. You aren't purchasing shirts to people, you're purchasing a sponsorship on the shirt with your donation going to The American Cancer Society.


I have decided that I'm setting a lofty, but very achievable goal. If I can raise $1,500 from all of you badasses on here, I will shave my head to honor cancer patients. Please share this within your groups if you feel compelled. All inquires can be PM'd to myself and I will give you an address to send donations. If my goal is achieved, photo proof will be sent to Kill The Can Facebook page, and killthecan.org. Thanks so much for reading and considering this. Any amount will help!

[pab1964]

A year is awesome, nicely done!

Way to go TH!! You built a great quit- thanks for sharing and for helping me with mine by being around here for it! I hope you stay active, keep helping others- you're a great quitter!

Crap, I missed this. Way to be Thansen. One year is a HUGE deal! Right in the ass indeed! 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'

Yes. Great accomplishment from a badass. Keep it up.

Damn I know you're proud, he'll I'm proud for you! 1 year dip free probably added 10 years to your life! Congrats brother quit with you today!

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

A year is awesome, nicely done!

Way to go TH!! You built a great quit- thanks for sharing and for helping me with mine by being around here for it! I hope you stay active, keep helping others- you're a great quitter!

Crap, I missed this. Way to be Thansen. One year is a HUGE deal! Right in the ass indeed! 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'

Yes. Great accomplishment from a badass. Keep it up.

[rdad]

A year is awesome, nicely done!

Way to go TH!! You built a great quit- thanks for sharing and for helping me with mine by being around here for it! I hope you stay active, keep helping others- you're a great quitter!

Crap, I missed this. Way to be Thansen. One year is a HUGE deal! Right in the ass indeed! 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'

[brettlees]

A year is awesome, nicely done!

Way to go TH!! You built a great quit- thanks for sharing and for helping me with mine by being around here for it! I hope you stay active, keep helping others- you're a great quitter!

[Thumblewort]

A year is awesome, nicely done!

[Vguy]

Awesome. Way to go. I stand in awe of a full year. http://www.picgifs.com/smileys/s[/url]

[trigerhapy]

Congrats on the full year! You are a bad-ass quitter, keep rolling those +1's bro!
'clap'

365!
Bad ass April Ape supporter, congratulations!

[Smeds]

Congrats on the full year! You are a bad-ass quitter, keep rolling those +1's bro!
'clap'

[MN_Ben]

The following was quoted from a co worker of mine. She posted this on Facebook, shortly after I posted a picture of myself on Facebook, enjoying a dinner and drinks, with my HOF coin and 200 day chip in the shocker position on my 300th day quit.

Many would argue smoking cigarettes kills. I however strongly feel that it saves lives,....of others, that come near me. Although I'm consuming thousands of molecules of cancerous poisons, making my skin age more quickly, yellowing my teeth and nails, blackening my lungs, etc etc etc. Don't hate on a smoker. I'm tired of the JUDGING. I do not judge if you choose to binge on chocolate, or if your vise is going on shopping sprees! People do things. People have addictions. Whether it's buying a 20 oz pop everyday, a favorite pack of gum, or a carton of cigarettes! In the end we will all end up 6 ft under, if you're not a smoker AWESOME!!!!! If you were a smoker and quit, CONGRATULATIONS, if you're still a smoker - ITS OKAY! Nobody is perfect. Stay humble. *End of rant.

[/b]

This is addict talk. This is weak talk. This is bitch talk. Was it a fluke she posted this 2 hrs after I flaunted my quit, possibly.Judging by her ignorance of me today, my initial feelings where true. She's jealous of my freedom.

I'm posting this for guests visiting this site ( and maybe some members who are struggling). Read the quoted paragraph. This is what weak ass addicts say. They make excuses. They justify why they use. "Life is unfair to me". "My boss is annoying". "I'm under a lot of stress". To which I respond, "Me and everyone else too!"

I could really go on and on about everything that's wrong with her post...but I won't. Read her post...evaluate what you want to achieve... and quit. Once and for all. Own up. Man up. Girl up. Quit. There is nothing "cool" about using.

I think the reason this hits home for me is because I was her once too.. I would lie to myself also.. really thats what being a nicotine addict is.. Nobody's perfect indeed, but some of us choose to take the red pill and embrace reality.. While others are happy to take the blue pill and remain a slave (sorry for the matrix reference)

It may be worth noting to her that

Smoking kills more people than alcohol, AIDS, car accidents, illegal drugs, murders, and suicides combined, with thousands more dying from spit tobacco use. Of the roughly 260,000 kids who become new regular, daily smokers each year, almost a third will ultimately die from it. In addition, smokers lose a decade of life because of their smoking.

But then again its on the side of every pack she buys also..

I am glad you are quit THansen, you are a BAQ and I am happy to post roll here with you..