As I approach the HOF (again) I have decided I do not want to post a HOF speech. What I want to do is make my introduction to everyone on KTC as Lochi21 v.2.0. If it was possible to change your name here, I would request it in a heartbeat. Simply put, Lochi21 is not the same person who was here before. Not by a long-shot!
I know there are many on KTC who shudder at my existence here. I can't say I blame you because failed attempts are not what KTC is about and so far that is the only thing I have proven I can do.
Thankfully, I have some quit brothers and sisters who have supported and challenged me this time. In doing so, I've tried my best to understand what makes me tick and what's necessary to make this my FINAL quit.
To that end, I believe I have been successful. It required creating a QUIT PLAN utilizing the philosophy "if you want to take the island then you need to burn the friggin' boats". Simply put, there can be no chance for retreat. Failure is simply not possible. Here is my RETREAD QUIT PLAN.
My Quit Plan (i.e. IÂ’m thinking seriously about caving so I Â…)
1. Stop whatever IÂ’m doing and take a moment to think about all the other quit brothers/sisters who are struggling to stay quit with me. Remember what it means to post roll and honor my word. Ask myself if those who have succeeded on KTC are that much stronger than me? Also think about all the people who have given me crap for coming back to KTC. Ask myself if I want them to feel superior to me again?
If that doesnÂ’t work:
2. Log on to KTC and read for a while. Go to the newest quit month and look at the brave men/women posting day 1, 3, 9, etc. and admire their courage. Read the Jenny Tom Kern story again. Go into the chat room and explain that I am thinking about caving. Give them some crap about being depressed or that IÂ’m a better man to my family with chew in my life.
If that doesnÂ’t work:
3. Call and talk to one of the many quit brothers I have programmed into my phone. I have to speak to at least one person. If nobody answers, leave a message. If nobody responds within a half hour. Proceed to step 4. Here are the numbers programmed in so far:
LEERON (Ron)
CASEYG (Casey)
AMGDENNEY (Michelle)
30YRADDICT (Dale)
KLARK (Kevin)
GATOR(Greg)
TARPON (Randy)
EVILMM (Garrett)
BIGBAMADAN(Daniel)
If that doesnÂ’t work:
4. Have my wife give me the stash of fake dip she has hidden away for emergencies. I have sworn off the fake dip because I hid that usage too and I need 100% transparency in my quit. But, I realize it has a place and itÂ’s at step #4 of my quit plan.
If that doesnÂ’t work:
5. Take out the signed copy of this quit plan and discuss with my wife why IÂ’m choosing chewing tobacco over my marriage and family.
If that doesnÂ’t work:
6. Both my wife and I need to re-sign the quit plan and I have to immediately proceed to step #7.
7. Toss in the towel and return to the misery of dipping again. But as a last resort, in the presence of my wife, I have to sit down with my 8 year old son and tell him that Dad is a weak man who loves chewing tobacco more than he loves his family. They both need to accompany me to the gas station and watch me buy the tin and put a dip in my mouth. And lastly, I have to tell him how I want him to chew with me one day.
P.S. My wife has agreed to this plan and has a signed copy in her possession. Because IÂ’m an addict and have failed multiple times at quitting, she has permission to leave me if I donÂ’t follow EVERY step including step #7.
P.P.S. Because IÂ’m an addict and have lied to my brothers/sisters on KTC before, I would be happy to have you confirm this quit plan by calling and talking to my wife.
Lochi21 v.2.0
Day 88