Been guesting it for a while, but finally made it official. Name's Chris (hence the nom de plume). I'm less than 4 months away from turning the big 5-0, and I've been dipping since 1989. Used to be a civilian dispatcher at a Sheriff's Department when the Sheriff got the brilliant idea that he wanted to eliminate the inmate's ability to make fire. "Inmates can no longer smoke in my facility." Soon, the Jail Guards couldn't smoke (cruel unusual punishment), then the Transfer Guards couldn't (same reason), then the road guys couldn't (Union equality fairness), then finally, the civilians couldn't (air circulation system would pump the air through and eventually into the Jail - cruel unusual)... Back then, Nicorette was still a prescription med, and I was smoking almost 2 packs of Winston's a day. No insurance then, because I was in my 20's, and was ten feet tall and bulletproof. Or so I thought... Sitting in Dispatch on day two of my forced quit back then, angry, pissed off, and ready to rip someone's head off and shit down their neck.... Deputy comes in to ask a favor, and I nearly did just that... He tells me, "Look, you go to 7-11 before your shift starts and get your free cup of coffee, right? Buy yourself a can of Copenhagen. When you're done with your coffee, you've got something to spit into." Been dipping ever since.
I've used fine cut Cope, long cut Cope, Skoal wintergreen straight, Kodiak, and most recently, Copenhagen straight. I usually burn through about 1-1/2 to 1-3/4 a can per day. I just quit on the 1/24/15, largely because my employer has announced a $50 surcharge for all people who test positive for nicotine, per paycheck, on the insurance. They don't pay that great of wages to begin with, and they sure as hell don't pay me what I'm worth, or guarantee me 40 hours a week (I think last week, I *might* have cracked 20 hours) An extra $100 bucks a month I can't afford, not on these wages and not on these hours. I am now a commercial driver, and have been for 21 years.
So... I've gotten through.... what, 11 days? 12 days? Had our nicotine mouth swab test done yesterday... passed with flying colors... Can't even remember what Copenhagen straight tastes like.... Want a dip so freaking bad, I think I would strangle someone if they got in my way.
Wrecked the wife's car the day after Christmas at 6:15 in the morning.... you guessed it... because I was Jonesing and "HAD" to get to the C-store to get some more. So.... the "wanting" isn't really an issue. In addition to driving, I also deliver doors windows (physical job). I just spent 2-1/2 hours on the bus getting home, and don't particularly feel like walking up to the C-store to get more. Funny thing is, I'd walk the same distance to buy another bottle.... I'm what you call a functioning alcoholic, but that's a different group.
