There’s no “re-writing” this travesty. You’ve written it, you own it. I’ve got zero issues with what I’ve written, or have ever said to you in the past. Why? Righteousness. That being said,
“I want people to know there’s good and bad on the site”
“It’s not written to cast blame on anyone but myself really”
Head = still fucked.
The sad part is you think you’re “pointing something out” to new quits that will help ... and the only thing you’re pointing out is what happens when you refuse to own your quit. So, in a sick way ... you’re right. Geez ... so simple. Don’t be like you. Good fucking lesson here newbs.
Accountability is a 2-way street. When you stop going down it, but expect everyone to drive all the way down to park in front of your house ... you’ve lost your way. I’ll tell you this, You best honor your brothers in your new group by hitting the floor posting to roll everyday to start your day. Of course, you’ll eventually reach a point where you feel sporadic posting is OK ... and get defensive and petulant about being called out for it, bail and cave again. All roads in your eyes most likely leading back to the mean people who tried to save your quit in the first place ... how very familiar.
Alternatively, you’ll realize that brotherhood here comes with conditions, you’ll honor those conditions without being a bitch, and you’ll remain quit. The choice has always been yours.
BTW, quitting chew doesn’t equate to being “sober”. Look up the word if you have to. Embrace one word and you just may make it.
Not using nicotine in any form = QUIT!
Aye maybe its the fog, but i still never said it was your fault. Why is it so god damn unbelievable that there might be flaws in our approach, do you think theres a way this site can have a higher success rate? I see people leaving all the time because they don't like your immature rhetoric. Why not discover the option and adapt? I genuinely want to hear a strong response to this from someone or anyone. Read any leadership book, it will mention that every person is different and responds differently to certain types of leadership. Actually have you heard of Bureaucratic Leadership? Maybe these terms refer to mostly businesses, but i consider this website a business, its in the business of saving lives. Bureaucratic Leadership is rarely effective, but is usually a leader that will reject colleagues or employees strategies that seem non traditional, or threaten the way that they've "always done things."
Why not be smarter than that? Can we not come up with a better strategy for a higher success rate that keeps more people around? Cuz idk about you, but I NEED TO BE HERE. Ive learned that lesson the hard way.
There are other sites that will soften their approach to you so it’s more palatable. Had you glanced around more than 1300 posts in 1200 days, you would’ve picked up on the fact this ain’t that site. Or, it wasn’t. Do you know who wants the soft approach? Your inner addict. He wants to know that somewhere, anywhere down the line ... there’s an out. An out where people won’t jump his shit, where he won’t be held accountable all the time. I mean geez, that’s exhausting!
You should’ve killed that inner addict long ago. You were given every opportunity. Multiple people tried to help. Me mostly, but it wasn’t your inner addict’s flavor. Regardless, you let him win. So far, all your verbal diarrhea typed out proves he’s alive and well.
If you had a little more experience in life ... were a little older, went down this road like others have multiple times, you would realize that the soft approach, or unconditional support is generally what family/loved ones give. Which is also generally shat on by our inner addicts at an alarming rate. It does not work. If it did, we would’ve quit for our family/friends/wives. But we didn’t. We found salvation in a bunch of like-minded individuals (idiots) who understood what addiction was, and understood accountability & brotherhood. Both the good, and the “bad”. These fuckers got me quit, and not by coddling my balls. You lost accountability & brotherhood by your own actions, and look where it got you.
You’ve got zero stance on suggesting WTF a good leader is, until you learn to unfuck your head. You caved. You disrespected your July ‘14 bros by not only following shitty posting habits, but then pushing back when course-corrected. Somehow, this has turned into a “I wasn’t shown proper leadership”? There were other ways to save you from caving, we just couldn’t tap into them properly?
Jesus, you’re hopeless. Own your quit, or it’ll own you again ... and again.
For the record, I’ve helped so many fucking quits you would lose your shit over it. I’ve got dudes who still to this day thank me for showing them the light. Not two, not three ... several. I continue to do so, daily. I’ve got over 75 quitter names in my phone I could and do reach out to, or lend an assist when needed. Can you say the same? No? Then maybe shut the fuck up, stop playing the victim, and own your shit this time.
Lastly, do you really think I get off on dudes like you? That I really have nothing going on but to correct your incorrect thoughts? What about the other dudes who’ve weighed in similarly? They have nothing better to do? Wrong. You’re still that dude thrashing in the water, head about to go under. Our advice is your goddam life ring, and you keep tossing it back. But that’s what QUIT people do when they see an ugly addict drowning. Toss a life ring.
Eventually, that boat will move on. As always, I can’t quit for you.