nTH time trying to Quit - First time poster

[copingwithoutcopen]

Made it on Sunday and today. Watched the game, didn't have anything. Will post roll tomorrow.... day 2 finished.

Hey kid! Great to see you back... We make our mark here in our quit group every day. Just hit quote (upper right), highlight, copy and cut the text in the bottom box... Paste to the top box and add your name and number of days since your last cave (3). That's your promise to yourself and your underlings that you won't slowly kill yourself today. Then, just honor your promise...I've sent my number to your inbox, have your secretary give me a shout if you still have trouble posting roll.

[isaac]

Made it on Sunday and today. Watched the game, didn't have anything. Will post roll tomorrow.... day 2 finished.

[jaynellie]

Last activity April 6th.  Fucking looser!   'Finger'

naw just a huge disappointment as reading back seems like superman there has forgotten that even the man of steel himself had a weakness and needed help from time to time.

Yeah - this hole thread has something weird about it.....

I agree CleanFuel there is something weird about it.If I was a betting man I'd say that Isaac is such a douche-bag pussy that he bailed before he caved.He found out this wasn't the place to be (KTC) because he couldn't be "The Man". He made a couple limp dick comments on his own thread and got called out right from the beginning.The most honorable thing to do in his addict mind was to come up with this cope-out.One thing I've learned in 65 days here is you better have some thick skin if your gonna come out and play with some weak sauce like he did. Just my .02 anyhow.

[CleanFuel]

Last activity April 6th.  Fucking looser!  'Finger'

naw just a huge disappointment as reading back seems like superman there has forgotten that even the man of steel himself had a weakness and needed help from time to time.

Yeah - this hole thread has something weird about it.....

[SirDerek]

Last activity April 6th. Fucking looser! 'Finger'

naw just a huge disappointment as reading back seems like superman there has forgotten that even the man of steel himself had a weakness and needed help from time to time.

[Parputt]

Last activity April 6th. Fucking looser! 'Finger'

[CleanFuel]

Hey kid... where's your promise? :rolleyes: Fuck the shareholders, huh? Your wife's probably a trophy, she'll find someone else... the kids will be fine. Hey kid you know what's more fun then finger banging a can of poison while watching college basketball?'jerk'  I'm willing to bet being knuckle deep in that trophy wife sporting a well glazed chin 'Y' comes fairly close. You should just quit now before someone else gets to find out. shocker

Outstanding copen. And u r 100% correct

Isaac, I sent u my number. Use it

[copingwithoutcopen]

Hey kid... where's your promise? :rolleyes: Fuck the shareholders, huh? Your wife's probably a trophy, she'll find someone else... the kids will be fine. Hey kid you know what's more fun then finger banging a can of poison while watching college basketball?'jerk' I'm willing to bet being knuckle deep in that trophy wife sporting a well glazed chin 'Y' comes fairly close. You should just quit now before someone else gets to find out. shocker

[Kubrick]

I think I have realized one thing. Dipping is my way to "deal." whatever that deal is. Work, money, stress, reality....

So, when you are dieing of cancer how will you "deal" with that?

Do you have a family? Do you have kids? Do you want to see them grow up or are you so fucking selfish that you will leave them without a father just so you can "deal". Come on man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You can do this! You have people here that dipped for 30+ years and are beating nicotine every day.

Let me ask you this? Today you meet a total stranger and he tells you he is going to beat the shit out of you just for the fuck of it. What are you going to do? You going to just stand there and take that beating or fight back?

Fight back mother fucker, please tell me you would fight back!

Reading his posts, it's pretty obvious he doesn't want to quit. He just doesn't want his handlers/clients who are going to insure him to find out.

Looks like he didn't even wait until after the insurance physical before going back to the can, which is when I was sure he would cave.

Issac, when you truly want to quit, you'll come back.

[mich 34]

You had my number, I've checked my phone and see I did not miss a text or call from you last night, I don't see your name on roll call for yesterday or today. Have you been posting roll and giving us your word? The tools are here, you need to use them. Either you want to quit or you don't, if you want it WORK for it, no one can do this for you. If you don't want it grab a can and stuff your face, watch porn or play games online. If you don't want it don't waste your time or ours, come back when you want to quit. I'm here to help if I can if you want this.

[Parputt]

I think I have realized one thing. Dipping is my way to "deal." whatever that deal is. Work, money, stress, reality....

So, when you are dieing of cancer how will you "deal" with that?

Do you have a family? Do you have kids? Do you want to see them grow up or are you so fucking selfish that you will leave them without a father just so you can "deal". Come on man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You can do this! You have people here that dipped for 30+ years and are beating nicotine every day.

Let me ask you this? Today you meet a total stranger and he tells you he is going to beat the shit out of you just for the fuck of it. What are you going to do? You going to just stand there and take that beating or fight back?

Fight back mother fucker, please tell me you would fight back!

[jaynellie]

I'm sorry. I have to start from zero tomorrow.

I know this is sick I have to say it to make it more real.

I don't even have any fresh cans. Found an old cup of old dip and sunflower seeds behind a computer. Dried up, all mixed together, had to sort through the whole mess picking out sunflower seeds. Don't even know how old it is. I'm sure you can imagine the rest.

Watching the final 4 with the legs kicked up and a beer. I collapsed and gave in.

Going to bed.... have to figure out how to start form zero again tomorrow.

Looking through these comments exchanged by me, I look like a fucking ass hole. I don't blame anyone here for calling me the spade a spade. I'm a wreck and talk too much.

I think I have realized one thing. Dipping is my way to "deal." whatever that deal is. Work, money, stress, reality....

I have to figure out a new way to "deal" with it.

My goal tomorrow is to not dip and figure out a new way to deal.

Dude really??? And you thought I was a punk for calling you "Kid".

PM me if you need anything.I want you to be quit.I want to help you if you want my help.You don't have to do this alone,you have found a brotherhood.QLF

[jaynellie]

I'm sorry. I have to start from zero tomorrow.

I know this is sick I have to say it to make it more real.

I don't even have any fresh cans. Found an old cup of old dip and sunflower seeds behind a computer. Dried up, all mixed together, had to sort through the whole mess picking out sunflower seeds. Don't even know how old it is. I'm sure you can imagine the rest.

Watching the final 4 with the legs kicked up and a beer. I collapsed and gave in.

Going to bed.... have to figure out how to start form zero again tomorrow.

Looking through these comments exchanged by me, I look like a fucking ass hole. I don't blame anyone here for calling me the spade a spade. I'm a wreck and talk too much.

I think I have realized one thing. Dipping is my way to "deal." whatever that deal is. Work, money, stress, reality....

I have to figure out a new way to "deal" with it.

My goal tomorrow is to not dip and figure out a new way to deal.

Dude really??? And you thought I was a punk for calling you "Kid".

[isaac]

I'm sorry. I have to start from zero tomorrow.

I know this is sick I have to say it to make it more real.

I don't even have any fresh cans. Found an old cup of old dip and sunflower seeds behind a computer. Dried up, all mixed together, had to sort through the whole mess picking out sunflower seeds. Don't even know how old it is. I'm sure you can imagine the rest.

Watching the final 4 with the legs kicked up and a beer. I collapsed and gave in.

Going to bed.... have to figure out how to start form zero again tomorrow.

Looking through these comments exchanged by me, I look like a fucking ass hole. I don't blame anyone here for calling me the spade a spade. I'm a wreck and talk too much.

I think I have realized one thing. Dipping is my way to "deal." whatever that deal is. Work, money, stress, reality....

I have to figure out a new way to "deal" with it.

My goal tomorrow is to not dip and figure out a new way to deal.

[Parputt]

I thought I was not going to come back to this site again. I didn't want to see and read the replies I was going to get. I tried to figure out a plan to remove myself from this environment without any trace that I had talked about things I would rather have not talked about. I had deleted all of the links I had bookmarked off of my iphone and laptop. Made sure i was using private emails, etc.

Please if I may give you some perspective. 

I can't believe I'm the person out here on a message board that needs help. In my life, in my world, I am a provider and support to everyone around me. It's so uncomfortable for me to be any sort of focus that being the topic of a forum string I started a week ago to get help with my dipping addiction... It has been very awkward. It's like when I was dipping. If nobody knows it doesn't exist. That's what I think right?

Zam,
You are right. I know my wife knows. I'm sure she knows. But she has never said anything. Nobody is Ninja enough. I'm sure it's uncomfortable for her. The position I have put her in... It's unacceptable.

I go to church most Sundays of every month. Going to church is not a magical wand that makes you better, or kill your daemons. There is no.. If I do this... I will get better.

I was freaked out this week and I came to your community to vent. Scared shitless to be honest with you. I already said it so the cat is out of the bag. In my current job others make a lot of $ from me and I'm their investment, and they want to insure me. If I'm honest... I probably wouldn't have come here if this event wasn't coming up. I'm using this testing I have to go through as a motivation to finally get rid of this fucking crappy addiction.  I needed an event.

Maybe i needed an event to kick me in the ass and maybe this is just what I needed to get straight.

I have dipped for the last 20 years. Straight Longcut. 2 tins a day. I can pack so much down that I can now put my index finger in my mouth and I can actually reach down and feel down and below my jaw to feel the underside of my jaw. Scares me to death.

I'm not sure what damage I have done that is UN-fixable.

I'm not a pill popper. Monday was bad, my fucking throat was KILLING ME. I asked my wife if we had any pain relievers. I don't have medicine she said look in the cabinet. I found hydocodine prescription from 2010.  Didn't know what that actually was but after taking it made the pain go away. I thought it was an antibiotic. Maybe I had strep at the same time I was quitting. I thought "Oxy" was a generic term for antibiotics. That's what I was thinking.

I am a nicotine addict. Probably drink too much, but at least I only drink on weekends.

I'd like to not be scared any more and come back to this forum. I'm sorry for the things I've said. I haven't had a dip since Sunday. It hasn't been "better" each day. Wednesday was worse that Tuesday. Tonight was worse that Wednesday. Even this evening watching ESPN I still had cravings. I hoped that each day gets better but that hasn't been the case.

I really don't like the focus, but If I can plea to this community. I need an outlet. i need some place to to be honest. I need a place where I can say I made it, or I didn't make it.

Isaac, just post your promise and honor it every single day.
We just quit here, that's it. No matter what.
Drink copious amounts of water so that you stay hydrated and the headaches will diminish. Exercise will keep your dopamine levels high so you don't feel so off kilter. Trident gum or sunflower seeds will give your mouth something to do while you contemplate your world.
Leave the excuses at the door.
Here's the thing Sir, your reason for being here seems purely monetary. You haven't had enough of the poison or the bondage to quit for you. Your kids aren't quite old enough to be discussed by your disease. Your wife would rather play nicey nice than call you out. Your employees have made it easy for you at work. Your dentists hasn't given you too much shit about the receding gums, tooth decay or legions because of the premium insurance. Your only incentive to quit is to save the share holders a boat load of money, it's not even your money. As soon as you pass the Insurance tests you'll be right back to ninja banging the can. Until you decide that you're done with nicotine, there is no amount of money that will keep you quit.
Most people, myself included will attest that the strength of their cravings diminish daily, becoming less frequent and less intense with each passing day. The control nicotine had over our lives decreases as well. After a couple weeks they are just a nuisance. After a couple of months they are hardly a thing. Be patient, decide that you will make it.

Post Roll and lets move on Isaac. Your writing an essay to a bunch of guys that come here to do one thing. Quit nicotine and take they're life back. How about you? If that's what you are doing post roll and make a promise not to use and you have our support. Get some thick skin and be ready because these guys don't pussy foot around. They will tell you how it is. If you say something that gets they're attention you will hear about it. This forum is for people that have quit or quiting the nicotine. They're is a bunch of good people on here that know how to Quit. They also know how to help you quit. LJQLF ( LETS JUST QUIT LIKE FUCK Isaac).

Post roll. Trade your phone number. Check your email - there is my number. It gets better. I will not say what I really want to say right now.......but just get in the fucking game and post roll.

The ball is in your court. We are here to help if you will accept it.