Nic free for 36 days, anxiety/low mood

[Bug Guy]

day78

Holy shit it is hard to concentrate. Im trying to study higher math and it is really really hard to stay on point. Anxiety and deression are still lurking daily, interaction with family members bring tears in my eyes pretty much all the time and im pretty sure last time my father so tears in my eyes were like 20+ years ago. Sleep has been actually pretty good on most nights and as i am too anxious to just sit around then i have worked out a lot so that probably pays off when im able to feel good about it. Anyone who's struggeling with things like that so far in their quit can hit me up, its easier to get throu it together. Oh and i started taking ashwagandha 2 days ago so we will see how that goes... im taking all the other kinds of vitamins and minerals too. Oh and most importantly FUCK NIC, ill get better one day.

Hang in there man. I went through a hell of a funk through late 60s into the 70s. I was irritable and just pissed off at everyone. Get used to saying sorry alot for awhile and keep plugging away. It does get better.

[Indrek]

day78

Holy shit it is hard to concentrate. Im trying to study higher math and it is really really hard to stay on point. Anxiety and deression are still lurking daily, interaction with family members bring tears in my eyes pretty much all the time and im pretty sure last time my father so tears in my eyes were like 20+ years ago. Sleep has been actually pretty good on most nights and as i am too anxious to just sit around then i have worked out a lot so that probably pays off when im able to feel good about it. Anyone who's struggeling with things like that so far in their quit can hit me up, its easier to get throu it together. Oh and i started taking ashwagandha 2 days ago so we will see how that goes... im taking all the other kinds of vitamins and minerals too. Oh and most importantly FUCK NIC, ill get better one day.

[Indrek]

Day74

Have had a couple of weird days. Did some work with my pops on the weekend and it was mostly good, didn't get to relax too much or lift weights, but we made a lot of progress on the my home. Felt good one day, next day it didn't seem to make me that happy. Weird and kind of unexplainable mood swings for few days. Today had a pretty good day at work, came home, wife and kid were visiting relatives. Thought of having great time relaxing and playing some computer games or something like that because i can't really do that any more with a 1.5 year old kid but i somehow ended up reading 2 hours about addiction struggles of other people convincing myself that i have it worse and felt pretty awful about it. Ill go do some heavy squats now and try to get my shit together.
I still have some mild anxiety that seems pretty persistent at times, no more racing heart thing or sweaty hands/feet but just a weird feeling that keeps me on my toes and noticing everything that i would consider not normal that happens to me, i think when i can get over the constant worry about my health or mental wellbeing then can be truly happy again.

Fuck nicotine, i am quit today.

[Indrek]

Day 64

Had a long 3x3 basketball tournament. Finished 4rd of 12 pretty good teams,  no fog or anything,  im guessing adrenaline from good competition held my brain awake. All in all awsome day so far, keep busy and kick that nic bitch ass EDD

[ankape]

Day63

Dear diary... for first and foremost fuck everything that contains nicotine.
Its been almost good for the last 5-6 days, some anxiety that seems to just jump out from nowhere and some weird visual things like some surfaces seem to vibrate/glow a little and i seem to notice a lot of things in my peripheral vision, at least i see things that are really there lol, i am just a lot jumpier than in my nicotine overdosed haze i am used being in. Its all probably different manifestations of stress/anxiety right? I am also pretty restless when i don't get to do physical activity every day. Went to swimming one night because i thought i wouldn't get any sleep if i won't tire myself out. I have lifted weights or done something physical pretty much every day for the past 8 weeks... Eating real healthy and taking lots of vitamins and minerals, fish oil and such.
Today i had a friendly game of basketball in the evening and got hit with a big blow of brain fog... I was literally totally zoned out on the basketball court, well the other team wasn't anything special and the game didn't matter at all but when my teammate asked me if I'm present in the moment then i realized that i really were not. It seems to clear a little when i'm writing this piece here. I also bought some 87% dark chocolate that might wake my brain up just a little.
The battle continues!

Exercise helps me and TON too!! My friend and I coined a phrase “chillin at a red light” because of the difference in how you feel with little things- like waiting on a red light -whether you’ve worked out yet! Good for you brother! That’s strong work! Discipline +consistency = success.
 you’re a badass!
ankape

[Indrek]

Day63

Dear diary... for first and foremost fuck everything that contains nicotine.
Its been almost good for the last 5-6 days, some anxiety that seems to just jump out from nowhere and some weird visual things like some surfaces seem to vibrate/glow a little and i seem to notice a lot of things in my peripheral vision, at least i see things that are really there lol, i am just a lot jumpier than in my nicotine overdosed haze i am used being in. Its all probably different manifestations of stress/anxiety right? I am also pretty restless when i don't get to do physical activity every day. Went to swimming one night because i thought i wouldn't get any sleep if i won't tire myself out. I have lifted weights or done something physical pretty much every day for the past 8 weeks... Eating real healthy and taking lots of vitamins and minerals, fish oil and such.
Today i had a friendly game of basketball in the evening and got hit with a big blow of brain fog... I was literally totally zoned out on the basketball court, well the other team wasn't anything special and the game didn't matter at all but when my teammate asked me if I'm present in the moment then i realized that i really were not. It seems to clear a little when i'm writing this piece here. I also bought some 87% dark chocolate that might wake my brain up just a little.
The battle continues!

[Indrek]

Thanks guys, i had a really rough morning but the day itself got a little better and better. Work is done and i can rest for 7 days now. I do have an appointment for a psychologist and a psychiatrist in next month. I know a girl who i used to go to school with who's now a psychiatrist and she listened to my story, wasn't really sure if it was from nicotine use and told me there's pregabalin for anxiety or anti-depressants for low mood. She told me the pregabalin is pretty much non addictive so i chose that and i took it the next day(once 75mg), and i guess did kind of felt a little better and not super anxious but the feelings where still there, so i don't know if i were just a little hopeful that i got at least SOME help and got a placebo effect from it or it did help. I started googling the drug later that night and found so much negative about withdrawals that i couldn't sleep most of the night coz my mind really cant handle thinking about another withdrawal from something else and also not getting any help with the situation, i just want to be done with it so i came to a conclusion to just brute force/cry to my wife/panic or whatever through this shit without meds. Will not take anything addictive. I read good things about cognitive behavioral therapy and I will try to get to do that with that psychologist I'm going to see next month. I have some 50mg 5htp capsules that i took for most of the first month, not sure if they helped or not... how can i ever know if anything helps for this shit lol. Im also taking multivitamin, magnesium and some stronger D vitamin because i live in a rather colder climate and there is almoust no sunshine all day long. The lack of sun is probably another thing really fucking me up but what are you going to do other than wait for the summer to arrive

Bump

Anxiety is unfortunately extremely common after quitting nicotine.  I had bouts of it pretty bad and it would just flare up out of the blue.  There were days when I had to practically pry myself out of bed.  Almost everyone seems to have some anxiety issues - some worst than others.  I can only say that it typically fades away over time but some folks do look for help in therapy.  I can't remember exactly when I stopped having bad attacks - but it was definitely longer than your quit count now.

You might want to consider trying various herbs that are nonaddictive but really can help calm you down - I use a combination of ashwagandha and rhodiola rosea which both help to level out cortisol in the body.  Kava kava is another herb that is very effective and has a nice calming effect - you can take it as a pill or they make nice teas with it too. 

Best of luck - this too shall pass.

Thank you for the valuable information, i will try to find some herbs and tell myself more that this will pass.

[FLLipOut]

Thanks guys, i had a really rough morning but the day itself got a little better and better. Work is done and i can rest for 7 days now. I do have an appointment for a psychologist and a psychiatrist in next month. I know a girl who i used to go to school with who's now a psychiatrist and she listened to my story, wasn't really sure if it was from nicotine use and told me there's pregabalin for anxiety or anti-depressants for low mood. She told me the pregabalin is pretty much non addictive so i chose that and i took it the next day(once 75mg), and i guess did kind of felt a little better and not super anxious but the feelings where still there, so i don't know if i were just a little hopeful that i got at least SOME help and got a placebo effect from it or it did help. I started googling the drug later that night and found so much negative about withdrawals that i couldn't sleep most of the night coz my mind really cant handle thinking about another withdrawal from something else and also not getting any help with the situation, i just want to be done with it so i came to a conclusion to just brute force/cry to my wife/panic or whatever through this shit without meds. Will not take anything addictive. I read good things about cognitive behavioral therapy and I will try to get to do that with that psychologist I'm going to see next month. I have some 50mg 5htp capsules that i took for most of the first month, not sure if they helped or not... how can i ever know if anything helps for this shit lol. Im also taking multivitamin, magnesium and some stronger D vitamin because i live in a rather colder climate and there is almoust no sunshine all day long. The lack of sun is probably another thing really fucking me up but what are you going to do other than wait for the summer to arrive

Bump

Anxiety is unfortunately extremely common after quitting nicotine.  I had bouts of it pretty bad and it would just flare up out of the blue.  There were days when I had to practically pry myself out of bed.  Almost everyone seems to have some anxiety issues - some worst than others.  I can only say that it typically fades away over time but some folks do look for help in therapy.  I can't remember exactly when I stopped having bad attacks - but it was definitely longer than your quit count now.

You might want to consider trying various herbs that are nonaddictive but really can help calm you down - I use a combination of ashwagandha and rhodiola rosea which both help to level out cortisol in the body.  Kava kava is another herb that is very effective and has a nice calming effect - you can take it as a pill or they make nice teas with it too. 

Best of luck - this too shall pass.

 

[EXBEARHAG]

Thanks guys, i had a really rough morning but the day itself got a little better and better. Work is done and i can rest for 7 days now. I do have an appointment for a psychologist and a psychiatrist in next month. I know a girl who i used to go to school with who's now a psychiatrist and she listened to my story, wasn't really sure if it was from nicotine use and told me there's pregabalin for anxiety or anti-depressants for low mood. She told me the pregabalin is pretty much non addictive so i chose that and i took it the next day(once 75mg), and i guess did kind of felt a little better and not super anxious but the feelings where still there, so i don't know if i were just a little hopeful that i got at least SOME help and got a placebo effect from it or it did help. I started googling the drug later that night and found so much negative about withdrawals that i couldn't sleep most of the night coz my mind really cant handle thinking about another withdrawal from something else and also not getting any help with the situation, i just want to be done with it so i came to a conclusion to just brute force/cry to my wife/panic or whatever through this shit without meds. Will not take anything addictive. I read good things about cognitive behavioral therapy and I will try to get to do that with that psychologist I'm going to see next month. I have some 50mg 5htp capsules that i took for most of the first month, not sure if they helped or not... how can i ever know if anything helps for this shit lol. Im also taking multivitamin, magnesium and some stronger D vitamin because i live in a rather colder climate and there is almoust no sunshine all day long. The lack of sun is probably another thing really fucking me up but what are you going to do other than wait for the summer to arrive

Bump

[EXBEARHAG]

Hey guys and girls, need a little support here. I have been 56 days clean and have had some okay days in last couple of weeks but mostly still struggle. I still go to gym or play basketball most of the days and try to keep busy. I have no gravings for nicotine, still hate that shit.
I have been feeling very anxious most of the day for 3-4 days. Its like an up and down rollercoaster where i go from 'somethings really wrong with me/dizzyness/sweaty hands' to more or less calm like i am right now typing this text. Im not getting full blown pan7c attacks but still get visual symptomps and sweat. Has anyone had this 2 mounths into the quit?

It’s actually pretty common to experience those types of symptoms. For however long you were dipping you were “short cutting” your stress responses and dulling any anxiety that you were feeling. Now those things are all “in your face” and there is something of a curve to get back to normal, healthy responses. For me it wasn’t so much the panic/anxiety issue, but the emotional imbalance. I would feel remarkable highs and lows in emotions that I hadn’t felt in...maybe ever...when I quit and that lasted for maybe even a couple hundred days before I learned how to manage again. All that said, not a doctor here so please please reach out to a medical professional if you have real concerns about your mental state or well-being. Proud to quit with you today! Miker0351 -1227

@Indrek I had similar symptoms.  Up to 60-70 days in I'd get sporadic anxiety attacks.  These episodes usually coincided, not surprisingly, with high stress times in my day/week.  I'm ~100 days ahead of you and I still have a couple episodes a week (usually on mornings when I have to leave home for a 24+ hr shift).  The good news is that I'm having less of these attacks than I used to and the strength and duration are also decreasing.

Certainly seek help if you feel like you may need it.  Other than that, my advice would be to set your sites on the end of the day.  You can quit for a day...you've done over 50 in a row.  Come in here and read as much as you can.  There are literally hundreds who have had similar symptoms.  Write down how you are feeling in your group and/or in here (Intros).  I often feel recharged when I comment or log a new intro entry.  Lean on your brothers and sisters here.  They can see you through if you are motivated to leave this addiction behind you and your family.  Hold the line man.  PM for digits if you like. 

PTBQWYT my friend

[Indrek]

Thanks guys, i had a really rough morning but the day itself got a little better and better. Work is done and i can rest for 7 days now. I do have an appointment for a psychologist and a psychiatrist in next month. I know a girl who i used to go to school with who's now a psychiatrist and she listened to my story, wasn't really sure if it was from nicotine use and told me there's pregabalin for anxiety or anti-depressants for low mood. She told me the pregabalin is pretty much non addictive so i chose that and i took it the next day(once 75mg), and i guess did kind of felt a little better and not super anxious but the feelings where still there, so i don't know if i were just a little hopeful that i got at least SOME help and got a placebo effect from it or it did help. I started googling the drug later that night and found so much negative about withdrawals that i couldn't sleep most of the night coz my mind really cant handle thinking about another withdrawal from something else and also not getting any help with the situation, i just want to be done with it so i came to a conclusion to just brute force/cry to my wife/panic or whatever through this shit without meds. Will not take anything addictive. I read good things about cognitive behavioral therapy and I will try to get to do that with that psychologist I'm going to see next month. I have some 50mg 5htp capsules that i took for most of the first month, not sure if they helped or not... how can i ever know if anything helps for this shit lol. Im also taking multivitamin, magnesium and some stronger D vitamin because i live in a rather colder climate and there is almoust no sunshine all day long. The lack of sun is probably another thing really fucking me up but what are you going to do other than wait for the summer to arrive

[Miker0351]

Hey guys and girls, need a little support here. I have been 56 days clean and have had some okay days in last couple of weeks but mostly still struggle. I still go to gym or play basketball most of the days and try to keep busy. I have no gravings for nicotine, still hate that shit.
I have been feeling very anxious most of the day for 3-4 days. Its like an up and down rollercoaster where i go from 'somethings really wrong with me/dizzyness/sweaty hands' to more or less calm like i am right now typing this text. Im not getting full blown pan7c attacks but still get visual symptomps and sweat. Has anyone had this 2 mounths into the quit?

It’s actually pretty common to experience those types of symptoms. For however long you were dipping you were “short cutting” your stress responses and dulling any anxiety that you were feeling. Now those things are all “in your face” and there is something of a curve to get back to normal, healthy responses. For me it wasn’t so much the panic/anxiety issue, but the emotional imbalance. I would feel remarkable highs and lows in emotions that I hadn’t felt in...maybe ever...when I quit and that lasted for maybe even a couple hundred days before I learned how to manage again. All that said, not a doctor here so please please reach out to a medical professional if you have real concerns about your mental state or well-being. Proud to quit with you today! Miker0351 -1227

[Done09]

Hey guys and girls, need a little support here. I have been 56 days clean and have had some okay days in last couple of weeks but mostly still struggle. I still go to gym or play basketball most of the days and try to keep busy. I have no gravings for nicotine, still hate that shit.
I have been feeling very anxious most of the day for 3-4 days. Its like an up and down rollercoaster where i go from 'somethings really wrong with me/dizzyness/sweaty hands' to more or less calm like i am right now typing this text. Im not getting full blown pan7c attacks but still get visual symptomps and sweat. Has anyone had this 2 mounths into the quit?

Hey guys and girls, need a little support here. I have been 56 days clean and have had some okay days in last couple of weeks but mostly still struggle. I still go to gym or play basketball most of the days and try to keep busy. I have no gravings for nicotine, still hate that shit.
I have been feeling very anxious most of the day for 3-4 days. Its like an up and down rollercoaster where i go from 'somethings really wrong with me/dizzyness/sweaty hands' to more or less calm like i am right now typing this text. Im not getting full blown pan7c attacks but still get visual symptomps and sweat. Has anyone had this 2 mounths into the quit?

103 days still get those symptoms occasionally. 50-70 days was the worst for me. Magnesium supplement seemed to help get me through the worst days. Stay quit and you’ll be fine.

[Indrek]

Hey guys and girls, need a little support here. I have been 56 days clean and have had some okay days in last couple of weeks but mostly still struggle. I still go to gym or play basketball most of the days and try to keep busy. I have no gravings for nicotine, still hate that shit.
I have been feeling very anxious most of the day for 3-4 days. Its like an up and down rollercoaster where i go from 'somethings really wrong with me/dizzyness/sweaty hands' to more or less calm like i am right now typing this text. Im not getting full blown pan7c attacks but still get visual symptomps and sweat. Has anyone had this 2 mounths into the quit?

[69franx]

Hey guys, I'm really glad i found this site and forum.
I'm 29 years old and have used nicotine on and off for about 10 years. I now have a beautiful 1.4 year old baby boy that i love more than i could ever think and who's probably fueling most of my motivation to be a better and healthier person. I haven't actually used dip before, my nicotine addiction came mostly from very strong snus and occasional sigaret smoking. Tried to quit many times, but haven't been too serious about it and ofc i failed. Last quit was about a year ago when i tried to quit my daily or rather nightly(very small amounts tho) cannabis use and nicotine at the same time. I was really miserable and had a lot of anxiety, worrying about mental health and same kind of symptoms like i have now, but i was sure it was from cannabis use rather than a nicotine and started using snus again in the process of it.  This time i didn't even plan to to it, but in the place i live the snus isn't actually sold in shops, you have to order it from Sweden or buy from "dealers" and i just ran out. None of my friends had any and i thought that maybe its time to quit from it, no big deal I have to do it someday anyway so why not now. Oh how wrong i was, it hit me like a freakin train - really bad mood swings, anxiety and feelings of absolutely no joy or positive thoughts. I had seen the new Joker movie a few days before i quit and i heard the "all i have is negative thoughts" quote in my head constantly for a week or more, also i googled every crazy theory that came in my mind like maybe i have schizophrenia because it felt like I'm really losing my mind. Before the quit I usually drank a lot of coffee and some energy drinks and was still low key drowsy through the day but no sleep issues, actually i could easily sleep after a big cup of coffee. But long story short, I'm 36 days clean now and it has been pretty terrible so far, but I'm never going back to nicotine after i felt what it was doing with my mind. I have pretty much no cravings even tho guys at work are doing snus and teasing me with it, i only have hate for the nicotine. The thing i struggle most with is an feeling of dread and thoughts that this anxiety will never go away, i think it has gone a little better, i already can tell that I'm not going to lose my mind... at least not completely... i hope  but I'm still feeling anxious most of the day and constantly fighting with anxious thoughts. During these withdrawals i think i have eaten the most healthy diet filled with mostly foods that i have googled to boost mood and to be healthiest. I'm not feeling hungry most of the day but i just eat 4 times to ensure that i have the best nutrition to help me get over with this shit. I also play basketball about 3 times a week and started to swim or lift weights on the off nights from basketball just to keep doing something other than worrying about my mental health all the time. I think my weight haven't changed, maybe i have lost a little bit. I don't feel love for the things i usually did -  like music and being good at basketball. I am not anxious in social situations or when I'm doing something intense but its pretty bad when I'm alone or at work because i have a pretty plain and boring job that doesn't keep my mind busy. So that's me and this is my final quit from nicotine

Nice job making it 36 days so far! Proud to quit with you!

@Indrek
We have quitters from all over the world here.  I too used to order my snus from Sweden back before you could buy it here in the US.  I would order Jakobson by the sleeve.  Proud to have you here and looking forward to having you part of KTC.  Be active and it will help you get through the tough times.

Welcome aboard Indrek, everything these folks above me have said is the way it works. Post a promise Every Damn Day(EDD) and do it early in your morning routine (Wake Up Piss Post (WUPP)) keep your promise, do it again the next day and you will be quit