I quit again

[worktowin]

Totally understand, I was ninja too.  And to a large degree, so was Applejack.

It is amazing how much energy you used hiding this addiction while feeding it.  Making excuses.  Lying.  Missing things with your wife or family so you could take long showers, spend 30 minutes sitting on the toilet enjoying trying to chase that rush that never came again, or driving around aimlessly for no reason.  How about the effort to hide the little containers, or spit bottles?  Applejack even built little custom hide-ey holes to stash tins.  Lying is an exhausting business to be in.

The funk gets better.  Today you are winning.  You lost a lot of days in a row, it will take some time for the win to set in and for you to feel like you are winning, but you are.

We are here for you bro.  One day at a time.

Michael

If you haven’t gotten some phone numbers to chat, you should. Fair warning, applejack is well known to share dick pics !

Just kidding!  He’s a great dude that will do anything to help you. This is a lot easier as a team. Being down is ok by the way as long as you make it through the day. Tough times never last. Tough people do.

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

Yep I’m winning but it sure is difficult at times. For me it’s the relentless anxiety. At times it’s just living in a constant state of fear. Only time I don’t feel fear is the great escape called sleep. It usually settles down in the evening after dinner so I can fall asleep but within an hour of waking it’s fear all over again for most of the day. I don’t drink alcohol so I don’t have that to lean on and I definitely wouldn’t consider benzodiazepines because they are just plain nasty addictive so here we are white knuckles every day. If it weren’t for the anxiety or depression it wouldn’t be that bad. Yes one day at a time.

Day 73
Feel like I’m back at the beginning. Woke up at 4:00 am with tingling and anxiety. The depression and brain fog has set in as well. I guess this is what the funk feels like. If I sit or lay down I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin. So here I am trying to keep moving. I think it’s called akathesia or twired. Crazy how much dip fucks us up. I actually felt good when I was dipping but going back is not an option ever again.
I’d rather not give my number out because I was a ninja dipper therefore I’m a ninja quitter. It could possibly destroy a marriage if it got out. I just need to get past this and put it in the rear view mirror. I do plan on sticking around though to help the new quitters as they show up.
I will not dip today!!!!!

Thanks Michael for the encouragement. Yes you described me perfectly. I ninja dipped from 1991 to 2005. I actually started dipping in 84 but she knew about it and hated it. I stopped in 91 about a month before our spring time wedding. Zero withdrawal. I started dipping again that fall under the radar until 2005 and stopped. Then 4 years ago I took a pinch and you know the rest. I never even knew about withdrawal until a day or so after. Talk about being blindsided.
If anyone out there wants to share their experience with the funk it would be great to hear. It does give comfort knowing that it does end. BTW I have massive fog and some anxiety now.

I got nothing to add more more encouragement.

You’re doing ALL the right things and that will result in ALL the right things. Power on. Let the past be the past. Intentionally find things to celebrate. Do it. Rock on brother!

Fog. I lost a good 2 months of my life. I lived, but have zero recollection of the living. Christmas 2012 and NY 2013 may not have even happened as far as I know. I have friends on the site (including AJ the dick pic sender (just kidding maybe?)) who experienced anxiety. Some severe. Nicotine seems to target high performing ocd types. People who live structured successful lives and manage things to an insane level. Nicotine provides an escape from the highs and the lows. Hell yes my team is winning!  Throw in a dip!  Oh man my mom is sick and in the hospital. Throw in a dip. In other words, nicotine provides an escape… from life. Think about that for a bit. And if a pic from AJ would help….

Michael.

[AppleJack]

Totally understand, I was ninja too.  And to a large degree, so was Applejack.

It is amazing how much energy you used hiding this addiction while feeding it.  Making excuses.  Lying.  Missing things with your wife or family so you could take long showers, spend 30 minutes sitting on the toilet enjoying trying to chase that rush that never came again, or driving around aimlessly for no reason.  How about the effort to hide the little containers, or spit bottles?  Applejack even built little custom hide-ey holes to stash tins.  Lying is an exhausting business to be in.

The funk gets better.  Today you are winning.  You lost a lot of days in a row, it will take some time for the win to set in and for you to feel like you are winning, but you are.

We are here for you bro.  One day at a time.

Michael

If you haven’t gotten some phone numbers to chat, you should. Fair warning, applejack is well known to share dick pics !

Just kidding!  He’s a great dude that will do anything to help you. This is a lot easier as a team. Being down is ok by the way as long as you make it through the day. Tough times never last. Tough people do.

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

Yep I’m winning but it sure is difficult at times. For me it’s the relentless anxiety. At times it’s just living in a constant state of fear. Only time I don’t feel fear is the great escape called sleep. It usually settles down in the evening after dinner so I can fall asleep but within an hour of waking it’s fear all over again for most of the day. I don’t drink alcohol so I don’t have that to lean on and I definitely wouldn’t consider benzodiazepines because they are just plain nasty addictive so here we are white knuckles every day. If it weren’t for the anxiety or depression it wouldn’t be that bad. Yes one day at a time.

Day 73
Feel like I’m back at the beginning. Woke up at 4:00 am with tingling and anxiety. The depression and brain fog has set in as well. I guess this is what the funk feels like. If I sit or lay down I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin. So here I am trying to keep moving. I think it’s called akathesia or twired. Crazy how much dip fucks us up. I actually felt good when I was dipping but going back is not an option ever again.
I’d rather not give my number out because I was a ninja dipper therefore I’m a ninja quitter. It could possibly destroy a marriage if it got out. I just need to get past this and put it in the rear view mirror. I do plan on sticking around though to help the new quitters as they show up.
I will not dip today!!!!!

Thanks Michael for the encouragement. Yes you described me perfectly. I ninja dipped from 1991 to 2005. I actually started dipping in 84 but she knew about it and hated it. I stopped in 91 about a month before our spring time wedding. Zero withdrawal. I started dipping again that fall under the radar until 2005 and stopped. Then 4 years ago I took a pinch and you know the rest. I never even knew about withdrawal until a day or so after. Talk about being blindsided.
If anyone out there wants to share their experience with the funk it would be great to hear. It does give comfort knowing that it does end. BTW I have massive fog and some anxiety now.

I got nothing to add more more encouragement.

You’re doing ALL the right things and that will result in ALL the right things. Power on. Let the past be the past. Intentionally find things to celebrate. Do it. Rock on brother!

[Dipchit]

Totally understand, I was ninja too.  And to a large degree, so was Applejack.

It is amazing how much energy you used hiding this addiction while feeding it.  Making excuses.  Lying.  Missing things with your wife or family so you could take long showers, spend 30 minutes sitting on the toilet enjoying trying to chase that rush that never came again, or driving around aimlessly for no reason.  How about the effort to hide the little containers, or spit bottles?  Applejack even built little custom hide-ey holes to stash tins.  Lying is an exhausting business to be in.

The funk gets better.  Today you are winning.  You lost a lot of days in a row, it will take some time for the win to set in and for you to feel like you are winning, but you are.

We are here for you bro.  One day at a time.

Michael

If you haven’t gotten some phone numbers to chat, you should. Fair warning, applejack is well known to share dick pics !

Just kidding!  He’s a great dude that will do anything to help you. This is a lot easier as a team. Being down is ok by the way as long as you make it through the day. Tough times never last. Tough people do.

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

Yep I’m winning but it sure is difficult at times. For me it’s the relentless anxiety. At times it’s just living in a constant state of fear. Only time I don’t feel fear is the great escape called sleep. It usually settles down in the evening after dinner so I can fall asleep but within an hour of waking it’s fear all over again for most of the day. I don’t drink alcohol so I don’t have that to lean on and I definitely wouldn’t consider benzodiazepines because they are just plain nasty addictive so here we are white knuckles every day. If it weren’t for the anxiety or depression it wouldn’t be that bad. Yes one day at a time.

Day 73
Feel like I’m back at the beginning. Woke up at 4:00 am with tingling and anxiety. The depression and brain fog has set in as well. I guess this is what the funk feels like. If I sit or lay down I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin. So here I am trying to keep moving. I think it’s called akathesia or twired. Crazy how much dip fucks us up. I actually felt good when I was dipping but going back is not an option ever again.
I’d rather not give my number out because I was a ninja dipper therefore I’m a ninja quitter. It could possibly destroy a marriage if it got out. I just need to get past this and put it in the rear view mirror. I do plan on sticking around though to help the new quitters as they show up.
I will not dip today!!!!!

Thanks Michael for the encouragement. Yes you described me perfectly. I ninja dipped from 1991 to 2005. I actually started dipping in 84 but she knew about it and hated it. I stopped in 91 about a month before our spring time wedding. Zero withdrawal. I started dipping again that fall under the radar until 2005 and stopped. Then 4 years ago I took a pinch and you know the rest. I never even knew about withdrawal until a day or so after. Talk about being blindsided.
If anyone out there wants to share their experience with the funk it would be great to hear. It does give comfort knowing that it does end. BTW I have massive fog and some anxiety now.

[worktowin]

Totally understand, I was ninja too.  And to a large degree, so was Applejack.

It is amazing how much energy you used hiding this addiction while feeding it.  Making excuses.  Lying.  Missing things with your wife or family so you could take long showers, spend 30 minutes sitting on the toilet enjoying trying to chase that rush that never came again, or driving around aimlessly for no reason.  How about the effort to hide the little containers, or spit bottles?  Applejack even built little custom hide-ey holes to stash tins.  Lying is an exhausting business to be in.

The funk gets better.  Today you are winning.  You lost a lot of days in a row, it will take some time for the win to set in and for you to feel like you are winning, but you are.

We are here for you bro.  One day at a time.

Michael

If you haven’t gotten some phone numbers to chat, you should. Fair warning, applejack is well known to share dick pics !

Just kidding!  He’s a great dude that will do anything to help you. This is a lot easier as a team. Being down is ok by the way as long as you make it through the day. Tough times never last. Tough people do.

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

Yep I’m winning but it sure is difficult at times. For me it’s the relentless anxiety. At times it’s just living in a constant state of fear. Only time I don’t feel fear is the great escape called sleep. It usually settles down in the evening after dinner so I can fall asleep but within an hour of waking it’s fear all over again for most of the day. I don’t drink alcohol so I don’t have that to lean on and I definitely wouldn’t consider benzodiazepines because they are just plain nasty addictive so here we are white knuckles every day. If it weren’t for the anxiety or depression it wouldn’t be that bad. Yes one day at a time.

Day 73
Feel like I’m back at the beginning. Woke up at 4:00 am with tingling and anxiety. The depression and brain fog has set in as well. I guess this is what the funk feels like. If I sit or lay down I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin. So here I am trying to keep moving. I think it’s called akathesia or twired. Crazy how much dip fucks us up. I actually felt good when I was dipping but going back is not an option ever again.
I’d rather not give my number out because I was a ninja dipper therefore I’m a ninja quitter. It could possibly destroy a marriage if it got out. I just need to get past this and put it in the rear view mirror. I do plan on sticking around though to help the new quitters as they show up.
I will not dip today!!!!!

[Dipchit]

If you haven’t gotten some phone numbers to chat, you should. Fair warning, applejack is well known to share dick pics !

Just kidding!  He’s a great dude that will do anything to help you. This is a lot easier as a team. Being down is ok by the way as long as you make it through the day. Tough times never last. Tough people do.

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

Yep I’m winning but it sure is difficult at times. For me it’s the relentless anxiety. At times it’s just living in a constant state of fear. Only time I don’t feel fear is the great escape called sleep. It usually settles down in the evening after dinner so I can fall asleep but within an hour of waking it’s fear all over again for most of the day. I don’t drink alcohol so I don’t have that to lean on and I definitely wouldn’t consider benzodiazepines because they are just plain nasty addictive so here we are white knuckles every day. If it weren’t for the anxiety or depression it wouldn’t be that bad. Yes one day at a time.

Day 73
Feel like I’m back at the beginning. Woke up at 4:00 am with tingling and anxiety. The depression and brain fog has set in as well. I guess this is what the funk feels like. If I sit or lay down I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin. So here I am trying to keep moving. I think it’s called akathesia or twired. Crazy how much dip fucks us up. I actually felt good when I was dipping but going back is not an option ever again.
I’d rather not give my number out because I was a ninja dipper therefore I’m a ninja quitter. It could possibly destroy a marriage if it got out. I just need to get past this and put it in the rear view mirror. I do plan on sticking around though to help the new quitters as they show up.
I will not dip today!!!!!

[worktowin]

If you haven’t gotten some phone numbers to chat, you should. Fair warning, applejack is well known to share dick pics !

Just kidding!  He’s a great dude that will do anything to help you. This is a lot easier as a team. Being down is ok by the way as long as you make it through the day. Tough times never last. Tough people do.

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

Yep I’m winning but it sure is difficult at times. For me it’s the relentless anxiety. At times it’s just living in a constant state of fear. Only time I don’t feel fear is the great escape called sleep. It usually settles down in the evening after dinner so I can fall asleep but within an hour of waking it’s fear all over again for most of the day. I don’t drink alcohol so I don’t have that to lean on and I definitely wouldn’t consider benzodiazepines because they are just plain nasty addictive so here we are white knuckles every day. If it weren’t for the anxiety or depression it wouldn’t be that bad. Yes one day at a time.

[Dipchit]

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

Yep I’m winning but it sure is difficult at times. For me it’s the relentless anxiety. At times it’s just living in a constant state of fear. Only time I don’t feel fear is the great escape called sleep. It usually settles down in the evening after dinner so I can fall asleep but within an hour of waking it’s fear all over again for most of the day. I don’t drink alcohol so I don’t have that to lean on and I definitely wouldn’t consider benzodiazepines because they are just plain nasty addictive so here we are white knuckles every day. If it weren’t for the anxiety or depression it wouldn’t be that bad. Yes one day at a time.

[AppleJack]

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

I don’t have much too add, bro. Everyone’s fight with their addict brain is different. For some, anger helps. For some, physical activity works. For some, a medication assist is appropriate. For some, white knuckling through is the way they choose. The list goes on. I think it’s safe to say that most of us dealt with “something” like what you’re going through when we first quit. So… you’re NOT alone. Nope. I lean into the anxiety side of the scale. Always have. I’m a naturally high string dude. Sometimes that gets the better of me and I have to remember to just freaking slow my roll. The other thing I have to remember is what I’m going to say to you right now… give yourself grace. You took that one pinch after 14 years. Yeah, that sucks ass. I would feel the same way! No lie. But… it’s done, man. It happened. Stop beating yourself up. Stop with that shit.

It. Is. Not. Productive.

You are here. You are turning it around. You are putting it back in the rear view mirror where it belongs. Lesson learned? I think so! Give yourself grace. Winning over an addiction is fucking hard. It’s supposed to be. Once through the fight this time… freedom will be that much sweeter for how hard this is right now. You will value it more and you will do everything you can to keep it that way. Rock on, brother. You’re winning.

[Dipchit]

Day 72.
Thanks worktowin. Today so far it feels like my brain hurts. Depressed mood and feeling just weary

[worktowin]

71 days is awesome, but you are rewiring years of behavior and addiction. Keep that in mind. It gets MUCH better, that is guaranteed. One day at a time you are healing bro. You’ve got some strong support here that knows what you are going through. Be proud of your accomplishment.

Day 71.
Feeling like shit again today. Ain’t gunna sugar coat it. Yesterday my morning depersonalization and depression turned into anxiety in the mid afternoon and lasted until just before bedtime. This morning is depression and anxiety mixed. What really pisses me off is all the medical stuff I read on the innerweb says nicotine withdrawal lasts 2 to 4 weeks and is gone. BULL SHIT!!! It wasn’t until I found this place I knew how long it really lasts. Just like doctors claim that opioid withdrawal is over in 2 weeks. I have a buddy that is 2 years out and still struggling and he only took his medication as directed. Fuckin doctors don’t have a clue about the real world. I’m pissed at myself for taking that pinch 4 years ago after 14 years clean and I’m pissed at the clueless doctors about withdrawal and I’m pissed at big tobacco for their stranglehold they put on us clueless bastards by adding even more nicotine to their products than what is naturally produced just so they can keep us hooked. So far day 71 sucks but at least I know that I will not dip today. Thanks for listening.

[Dipchit]

Day 71.
Feeling like shit again today. Ain’t gunna sugar coat it. Yesterday my morning depersonalization and depression turned into anxiety in the mid afternoon and lasted until just before bedtime. This morning is depression and anxiety mixed. What really pisses me off is all the medical stuff I read on the innerweb says nicotine withdrawal lasts 2 to 4 weeks and is gone. BULL SHIT!!! It wasn’t until I found this place I knew how long it really lasts. Just like doctors claim that opioid withdrawal is over in 2 weeks. I have a buddy that is 2 years out and still struggling and he only took his medication as directed. Fuckin doctors don’t have a clue about the real world. I’m pissed at myself for taking that pinch 4 years ago after 14 years clean and I’m pissed at the clueless doctors about withdrawal and I’m pissed at big tobacco for their stranglehold they put on us clueless bastards by adding even more nicotine to their products than what is naturally produced just so they can keep us hooked. So far day 71 sucks but at least I know that I will not dip today. Thanks for listening.

[Dipchit]

Thanks for the encouragement Applejack. I will beat this nic bitch into submission and that is a promise to me and the world. I remember back to my last stop that lasted over 10 years and think how great life was and I can’t believe I caved thinking just one dip can’t hurt. Guess I was wrong. Lesson learned, never again. Thanks again Applejack I will use your words of encouragement to slay the nic bitch.

[AppleJack]

Day 70. I will never cave to the crave.
Wow I must have entered the funk. Last night I had some of the worst cravings since the beginning. I went a long time with just anxiety and depression but like I mentioned the craves hit like a freight train. I made it through by washing the car in 90 degree heat and taking a shower. It was too hot for a run or bike ride so I just endured it until it finally let up around dinner time. I’m kinda shell shocked as I type this and also feeling a little depressed. Quitting dip is a total mind fuck. Has anyone else experienced depersonalization during the quit? I just don’t feel like myself at all. I think I’m going to take my ATV (4 wheeler) for a ride through the woods. That might free up the mind. Let’s keep fighting.

It IS a mind fuck... 100%.
Funks come and go. Just like life. Dip funks are no worse, really. It's just that your security blanket to get you through the funks is what you just quit! You're trying to power through without it... It's all a massive brain rewire and it takes time, brother. It takes time. Keeping busy is absolutely key to redirect yourself.
Don't get down on yourself for the mental lows, either. Don't you dare! Get super pissed that the ground up shit in that can put you here. You're doing something that a LARGE number of people fail at... that's something to celebrate! Take pride in the pain because the payoff gives the pain purpose... freedom. 70 days is amazing. You hear me? AMAZING! Start to reframe your thinking away from the "Woe is me" that your addict brain wants to wallow in... instead, wallow in the tastes of freedom you're starting to experience. I dipped for 20 years, my bro. 2 cans a day for a huge chunk of it. This was the hardest thing I've ever done. I was determined to do this, though. I had to. So... I owned it. Owned. It. Got involved. Got to know people. Subjected the pages of KTC with my brain dumps. You name it. Owned. it. Today is day 3,778 for me and being quit is as easy as breathing at this point. Saying "It gets easier" doesn't quite do it. Quit becomes "normal" if you do the work and own it right now. Normal. It moves away from something that you're working at to, just, something that you ARE. No thought... no effort. Freedom. Rock on, bro.

[Dipchit]

Day 70. I will never cave to the crave.
Wow I must have entered the funk. Last night I had some of the worst cravings since the beginning. I went a long time with just anxiety and depression but like I mentioned the craves hit like a freight train. I made it through by washing the car in 90 degree heat and taking a shower. It was too hot for a run or bike ride so I just endured it until it finally let up around dinner time. I’m kinda shell shocked as I type this and also feeling a little depressed. Quitting dip is a total mind fuck. Has anyone else experienced depersonalization during the quit? I just don’t feel like myself at all. I think I’m going to take my ATV (4 wheeler) for a ride through the woods. That might free up the mind. Let’s keep fighting.

[Dipchit]

Day 69.
I will never dip again.
Depression is the symptom I woke up to today. It’s just inconceivable to me that nicotine withdrawal can last this long, especially after 3 previous stops with virtually zero symptoms and those were after years of use. Well today I’m going rummage sailing with my better half so hopefully I can find some useful crap for cheap. Stay quit you all because I hear that eventually it gets better.