Don't know if this is the right place or not but I have to get this off my chest... Quit on January 13th and made it almost three weeks and caved like a bitch. I let my friends down, my family down and my fiancee down. I also let down all of the guys in my quit group bc contrary to everything I have read I thought I could have just "one dip". There is no such thing... I caved last Sunday after a very stressful week and have not been able to quit again until today. I messed up. I fell into the lie of rationalization. Let me tell you something rationalizing is the fucking enemy. It will eat you alive from the inside out. DO NOT RATIONALIZE YOUR DECISION! I battled for three weeks and felt the best I have in years, and now I find myself back at day one. I won't let this shit beat me, it won a battle and it ends there. I will be posting roll in the May group starting tomorrow and starting on a fresh foot. Please friends once you quit don't think you can have "just one". You are an addict. You can't. I made it 3 weeks almost and that lie and rationalization lead to a complete relapse, not just a cave. I messed up bad, and I'm man enough to admit it, so tomorrow I start at Day 1. My apologies to whoever reads this, I let everyone down.