This Time Is For Real

[Candoit]

Right now my plan is...

Apply non stop for jobs. Stop this AFLAC shit now
Apply for unemployment benefits
Make enough money to support more than my share any way possible
Work on me. Dedicate time to working on me. Going to the gym, going out and being social again

Showing through actions that I have changed.

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

I'll tell you. Toastmasters is great. I love it. It's cheap too. I recommend it if you're looking to gain confidence. Plus you'll meet some cool people.

I will.

After spending the last hour crying my eyes out, I cant come to grips with just letting things go and happen. I want her to tell me right now how to fix it. I want to know that we will always be a family. I want to know that we will come out of this more in love than ever before. I keep asking her the same questions over and over.

But she is in a different place right now, I just need to hold onto her long enough to prove that I am worth loving.

Develop a plan. Develop a system. Tell your wife your plan and your system to get the income back up to where it needs to be. It's a process. It's a system. Tell her your system. Stick to your system every single day. It's just like quitting. Same dedication and same systematic behavior. Build your framework. Share with your wife. Get up every damn morning and work the fuck out of your system. Don't take no shit from no one. You are special. You can go out there and do whatever you want. Tackle it head on.

[Mcarmo44]

I just need to hold onto her long enough to prove that I am worth loving.

I know you are in a tough place and I'm here for you too man. But never forget your self worth comes from within not from another person. Is she is not in love with you it does not make you unworthy of it, it just means it's not the right fit.

[basshaug]

I'll tell you. Toastmasters is great. I love it. It's cheap too. I recommend it if you're looking to gain confidence. Plus you'll meet some cool people.

I will.

After spending the last hour crying my eyes out, I cant come to grips with just letting things go and happen. I want her to tell me right now how to fix it. I want to know that we will always be a family. I want to know that we will come out of this more in love than ever before. I keep asking her the same questions over and over.

But she is in a different place right now, I just need to hold onto her long enough to prove that I am worth loving.

Candoit:

I went through this 17 years or so ago (with my first wife). I heard some of the same things.

I don't know what to tell you . . it was one of the darkest periods of my life.

But I will be thinking about you.

Me too brother. I'm always a text or phone call away.

You are a smart guy. You will land on your feet and eventually work your way into a position where you are truly happy and satisfied. Keep on fighting. Keep on trudging through.

[Grievous Angel]

I'll tell you. Toastmasters is great. I love it. It's cheap too. I recommend it if you're looking to gain confidence. Plus you'll meet some cool people.

I will.

After spending the last hour crying my eyes out, I cant come to grips with just letting things go and happen. I want her to tell me right now how to fix it. I want to know that we will always be a family. I want to know that we will come out of this more in love than ever before. I keep asking her the same questions over and over.

But she is in a different place right now, I just need to hold onto her long enough to prove that I am worth loving.

Candoit:

I went through this 17 years or so ago (with my first wife). I heard some of the same things.

I don't know what to tell you . . it was one of the darkest periods of my life.

But I will be thinking about you.

[Candoit]

I'll tell you. Toastmasters is great. I love it. It's cheap too. I recommend it if you're looking to gain confidence. Plus you'll meet some cool people.

I will.

After spending the last hour crying my eyes out, I cant come to grips with just letting things go and happen. I want her to tell me right now how to fix it. I want to know that we will always be a family. I want to know that we will come out of this more in love than ever before. I keep asking her the same questions over and over.

But she is in a different place right now, I just need to hold onto her long enough to prove that I am worth loving.

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

I'll tell you. Toastmasters is great. I love it. It's cheap too. I recommend it if you're looking to gain confidence. Plus you'll meet some cool people.

[pab1964]

And another thing. I just left Popcorn pick up for Cub Scouts. And I volunteer for fundraising for the Cub Scouts and I volunteer for fundraising for Little League. I think if you volunteer with whatever organization do the fundraising. Not many people want to do it. It'll give you good practice for sales and you'll find that raising funds for yourself is much easier. What I mean is: you'll learn that doing fundraising help should be passionate about pulling out money for the organization. And then you will hopefully realize that you can apply that's
M

Grizz my father was the Kernel for years. I am an Eagle Scout and Vigil Honor, also was lodge chief. I have two girls 7  4, so I dont think Scouting is in my immediate future. I am considering getting back involved in Masonary. I need to get out of the house and stop being a hermit more than practice sales skills. My biggest issue is that when I quit forced me to deal with all of the shit that it hid. Add on top of that my career coming unraveled. I have been grasping at straws to try and regain some kind of foothold.

My wife is right that I am not the same person I was 13 months ago. I need to change. I need to find that new medium between what I was and what I need to change.

I am way to stubborn and need to prove that I can do it on my own. That has to change.
I used to be able to see the big picture and now I cant.
I used to be confident but now I am timid.
I used have no fear of failure, now it consumes me.
I know spend more time thinking than doing.

There is a happy medium and I don't know how to get there. I will someday.

Wow, timid and fear are 2 words I would have never thought of to describe you! Use some of your knowledge and wisdom you put in here in real life. You can be very smart and at times intimidating on here. Stumbling blocks happen in almost everyone's life, you can choose to fight or lay down and I damn well know you're a fighter. Get off your ass and get it done whatever it is and whatever it takes. As far as your wife goes, stop and take time to see if it's you and don't wallow in your self pity! Sometimes we say things that sound a little harsh but often it takes a good swift kick in the nuts to wake us up! If I didn't give a shit, I wouldn't have already posted on this a half dozen times.

[Candoit]

And another thing. I just left Popcorn pick up for Cub Scouts. And I volunteer for fundraising for the Cub Scouts and I volunteer for fundraising for Little League. I think if you volunteer with whatever organization do the fundraising. Not many people want to do it. It'll give you good practice for sales and you'll find that raising funds for yourself is much easier. What I mean is: you'll learn that doing fundraising help should be passionate about pulling out money for the organization. And then you will hopefully realize that you can apply that's
M

Grizz my father was the Kernel for years. I am an Eagle Scout and Vigil Honor, also was lodge chief. I have two girls 7  4, so I dont think Scouting is in my immediate future. I am considering getting back involved in Masonary. I need to get out of the house and stop being a hermit more than practice sales skills. My biggest issue is that when I quit forced me to deal with all of the shit that it hid. Add on top of that my career coming unraveled. I have been grasping at straws to try and regain some kind of foothold.

My wife is right that I am not the same person I was 13 months ago. I need to change. I need to find that new medium between what I was and what I need to change.

I am way to stubborn and need to prove that I can do it on my own. That has to change.
I used to be able to see the big picture and now I cant.
I used to be confident but now I am timid.
I used have no fear of failure, now it consumes me.
I know spend more time thinking than doing.

There is a happy medium and I don't know how to get there. I will someday.

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

And another thing. I just left Popcorn pick up for Cub Scouts. And I volunteer for fundraising for the Cub Scouts and I volunteer for fundraising for Little League. I think if you volunteer with whatever organization do the fundraising. Not many people want to do it. It'll give you good practice for sales and you'll find that raising funds for yourself is much easier. What I mean is: you'll learn that doing fundraising help should be passionate about pulling out money for the organization. And then you will hopefully realize that you can apply that's
M

[cbird65]

Echoing all the thoughts, prayers. LinkedIn is another great business networking platform

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

Why not get a regular job and keep doing Aflac on the side? Join some networking groups too. I do BNI and toastmasters. Works well with my regular sales job and side business. With the networking you will make new friends and land some new business. Plus volunteer with your kids activities and stuff too. I was in a bad place about a year ago and I resolved to get out in the world and mix it up. Things have gotten better. More people are buying from me. I'm now thinking of joining Kiwanas or something like that on top of the other stuff. just some thoughts in what helped me a while back. Thought maybe it would help you.

[howgoodgodis]

Go to the wedding brother. Go to the wedding.

[pab1964]

At this point I have applied to 11 jobs in the past 24 hours
- UPS
- Macys x 2
- Lowes x 3
- Verizon Wireless x 2
- Sikoriksy
- Jenesen Communications
- A green home company

I put my truck, that I only use on the weekend up for sale.

Told AFLAC that I am done as soon as I find something that pays. But I cant seem to let go of it 100%, I dont know why, I think part of me knows that I could make it work at some point. But for now it needs to be done.

Tomorrow I need to apply to a minimum of 5 jobs. That is going to be my daily goal. I will post here for accountability sake.

I also need to figure out if I am going to go to a wedding with her tomorrow night. Her entire family will be there. I want to go but I dont know if she wants me there. She says it is up to me. IDK....so lost. I need to sleep on it.

Thank you all for the support. I am choosing to share it because this place is about fixing all of you and I need the support. KTC gives you more support than I can ever get face to face. The prayers, texts, messages, and posts do never go unnoticed or unread. I quit with you all every day.

I am going to at least continue to post about this in here. I need to document this journey for my sake. These next few weeks to months are going to be hard but I need to know I did everything possible.

Good on you brother. Sometimes it won't be easy, but it will always be worth it. Heard that around this place once or twice...

Go with your wife ,face all of her family with your head held high! Candoit whatever you do, don't feel sorry for yourself my brother, remember you will get through this and whatever comes of this you must let it be God's will. You are a man and there still may be a chance you could make some really good money with aflac but sometimes it takes awhile to build up clientele. One things for sure your ktc family has your back. You got this! You will get a job.

[KingNothing]

At this point I have applied to 11 jobs in the past 24 hours
- UPS
- Macys x 2
- Lowes x 3
- Verizon Wireless x 2
- Sikoriksy
- Jenesen Communications
- A green home company

I put my truck, that I only use on the weekend up for sale.

Told AFLAC that I am done as soon as I find something that pays. But I cant seem to let go of it 100%, I dont know why, I think part of me knows that I could make it work at some point. But for now it needs to be done.

Tomorrow I need to apply to a minimum of 5 jobs. That is going to be my daily goal. I will post here for accountability sake.

I also need to figure out if I am going to go to a wedding with her tomorrow night. Her entire family will be there. I want to go but I dont know if she wants me there. She says it is up to me. IDK....so lost. I need to sleep on it.

Thank you all for the support. I am choosing to share it because this place is about fixing all of you and I need the support. KTC gives you more support than I can ever get face to face. The prayers, texts, messages, and posts do never go unnoticed or unread. I quit with you all every day.

I am going to at least continue to post about this in here. I need to document this journey for my sake. These next few weeks to months are going to be hard but I need to know I did everything possible.

Good on you brother. Sometimes it won't be easy, but it will always be worth it. Heard that around this place once or twice...