Unexpected Day #1

[Rawls]

"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves..."

A grape can never be used as wine...
Until it is busted!

I quit with you today hg.
Rawls 952

[Dieselchick87]

Day 270.
Sucked it up and ordered some Hooch.

I still reach for the Oregon Mint once in a while. Hang in there and keep winning!

do that.
we do whatever it takes to stay quit.
I am very happy you are here and still hitting it hard.
Making no joke about how difficult it is to stay quit at any given moment show everyone that we all need to stay vigilant in the fight daily.
We should never be sorry for our struggles, they are there for a reason.
You are strong, you will win.

I have been leaning heavily on Oregon Mint the last couple of months so you are not alone keep hanging in there.

[ChickDip]

Day 270.
Sucked it up and ordered some Hooch.

I still reach for the Oregon Mint once in a while. Hang in there and keep winning!

do that.
we do whatever it takes to stay quit.
I am very happy you are here and still hitting it hard.
Making no joke about how difficult it is to stay quit at any given moment show everyone that we all need to stay vigilant in the fight daily.
We should never be sorry for our struggles, they are there for a reason.
You are strong, you will win.

[Nomore1959]

Day 270.
Sucked it up and ordered some Hooch.

I still reach for the Oregon Mint once in a while. Hang in there and keep winning!

[harvestgirl]

Day 270.
Sucked it up and ordered some Hooch.

[Nolaq]

It gets easier, I promise.

I think I've heard that once or twice before. 'winker'

Know it's true, and understand HG, you are WINNING!

Keep your head down, moving forward, because every day is a victory. Reach out if you need to.

[pab1964]

Day 269:

We've been celebrating March '17s quitters hitting their 2nd Floors this month. For today's roll, I asked this question:

"How many times have you tried to quit before this time?
Do you think KTC or a quit support site would have helped you earlier on?"

It spurred a conversation later on in the day, and while typing out a response in notepad to gather my thoughts, I ended up writing soemthing much more involved and not being able to stop.

It doesn't pay to think about "what ifs", but all I know is that if I did indeed had made it this far into my quit without KTC- I sure as hell wouldn't still be quit now.

I also was a combo dipper/smoker. I "quit" smoking but still smoked socially, if it was "a really bad day" as almost a treat, or if I was home alone. 269 days ago I quit all of it for good and while yes, I owe my quit first and foremost to myself, I could NOT have done it without KTC and the people I met on here.

In my intro I've stated numerous times in the past that if my words and story can help just one other person have the courage to think about quitting, quit, or stay quit, then it's worth it. The past few months have been a struggle and I really haven't been open enough about it. Part of me feels like it makes me look like I'm just begging for sympathy or some sort of applaud for staying quit. What justice does that provide for a quit? It doesn't, and that's not what I want.

What I want is to still let people know you can quit and stay quit through damn near anything if you keep your word, get involved, and ASK FOR HELP when you need it. Addiction doesn't make you weak. Events that happen out of your control don't make you weak.

Life has a funny way of working out- I was asked to conduct March right after my cousin died in a horrific tractor accident in February, along with some other family/personal events. Being a Conductor provided something for me to focus on and use as an outlet. While conducting March, we had our house fire on March 17th. My already jacked stress level sky rocketed. A week and a half later I hurt my shoulder, a week after that I was in the orthopedic's office, and the diagnoses and treatment since then has flipped my life 180 degrees.

Everything about the past few months has been a struggle. From being in near constant pain from my shoulder, to being on multiple opiate painkillers  oral steroids multiple times a day, to not being able to work, getting my CDL pulled because my damn med card was up and the DOT (rightfully so) couldn't accept any more waivers for medications. I can't even drive our pickup with a commercial insurance policy on it. I'm too much of a legal liability and I refuse to put that on the company I work for. I haven't even been in a tractor, combine, or even done anything at the shop hardly at all this year. I've been alone during most of this. I'm bored as all hell. Concentration is damn near impossible along with any type of regular sleep. My days are a haze of painful physical therapy, trying to "ration" out household chores so I'll have something to do later, working on sections of my yard (and by doing so KNOWING I'm overdoing and am going to be paying dearly for it within hours), and little projects like photography, coloring books, art, reading, Netflix, etc.

Nothing can be done to speed up the shoulder healing; there's no end date to this, no timeline of expected progress. I'm on an extended "vacation" that's making me stressed, anxious, and about to go fucking crazy. I'm facing months of physical therapy yet. I used to be able to bench press 175+lbs. Attempting to bench press a simple broomstick sends me into a sweaty, shaking, exhausted mess. The mental adaption is much worse than the physical pain.

I'm craving a pack of smokes way worse than I have in my entire life. I could care less about a can of dip. I want a cool crisp morning with a cup of coffee and a glorified cancer stick dangling from my mouth while a Percocet starts to kick in. Addict brain + addictive personality + old habits creeping up and dying hard.

But I can't.
And I wont.
Caving is not an option.
Lean on your group.
Lean on a different group.
Go on chat.
Laugh in the middle of the night at a month's GroupMe antics.
Call up people from another group that have somehow become your best friends.
Scream at them. Get fucking angry at the world for awhile. Cry.
Find a vet that's been here for awhile.
Find a new quitter that's still asking those "Is this normal?" questions.
ODAAT doesn't apply just to quitting- sometimes it applies to just life in general too.

Because all of that is much more worth it than failing yourself and quit. 100 days, 200 days, etc. are all great milestones.
The worst days of my quit happened after my Hall of Fame.
It sounds daunting and hopeless, but but you're not cured at any of them. You're never cured. You learn how to deal and cope with the cravings.
You learn how to shut up the little whispers of "just one won't hurt, right?".
It's a struggle, no doubt. No one on here will lie to you about it. They shouldn't. They can't.

It gets easier, I promise.

Because as messed up as this sounds, even with the absolute shit streak I'm going through, how bad my cravings are, and how low I can get, it's easier to say "never again" today than it was at days 1, 2, 3, etc.

Sorry to hear about all the struggles that you've gone through during your quit. Being able to balance all that stress and still have the ability to stay quit is amazing and you must be incredibly strong willed! Keep it up and keep us all posted. We want to to help you as much as you have helped us!

In the end.....you're a badass quitter and a lot of people look up to you! Keep doing what you're doing ODAAT! Your a huge part of a bunch of quitters now, thanks for sharing your quit with me! Damn proud to be quitting with you Edd!

[SuccessThisTime]

Proud to be quit with you Harvest.

"In my intro I've stated numerous times in the past that if my words and story can help just one other person have the courage to think about quitting, quit, or stay quit, then it's worth it."

^^^ I'm that guy. You, Gassy, CanTrap, Cmark, Jubs and a few others were there in chat my first week. I wouldn't have made it through those first days without you.

I hope you get well soon.

[Ryan.F]

Day 269:

We've been celebrating March '17s quitters hitting their 2nd Floors this month. For today's roll, I asked this question:

"How many times have you tried to quit before this time?
Do you think KTC or a quit support site would have helped you earlier on?"

It spurred a conversation later on in the day, and while typing out a response in notepad to gather my thoughts, I ended up writing soemthing much more involved and not being able to stop.

It doesn't pay to think about "what ifs", but all I know is that if I did indeed had made it this far into my quit without KTC- I sure as hell wouldn't still be quit now.

I also was a combo dipper/smoker. I "quit" smoking but still smoked socially, if it was "a really bad day" as almost a treat, or if I was home alone. 269 days ago I quit all of it for good and while yes, I owe my quit first and foremost to myself, I could NOT have done it without KTC and the people I met on here.

In my intro I've stated numerous times in the past that if my words and story can help just one other person have the courage to think about quitting, quit, or stay quit, then it's worth it. The past few months have been a struggle and I really haven't been open enough about it. Part of me feels like it makes me look like I'm just begging for sympathy or some sort of applaud for staying quit. What justice does that provide for a quit? It doesn't, and that's not what I want.

What I want is to still let people know you can quit and stay quit through damn near anything if you keep your word, get involved, and ASK FOR HELP when you need it. Addiction doesn't make you weak. Events that happen out of your control don't make you weak.

Life has a funny way of working out- I was asked to conduct March right after my cousin died in a horrific tractor accident in February, along with some other family/personal events. Being a Conductor provided something for me to focus on and use as an outlet. While conducting March, we had our house fire on March 17th. My already jacked stress level sky rocketed. A week and a half later I hurt my shoulder, a week after that I was in the orthopedic's office, and the diagnoses and treatment since then has flipped my life 180 degrees.

Everything about the past few months has been a struggle. From being in near constant pain from my shoulder, to being on multiple opiate painkillers  oral steroids multiple times a day, to not being able to work, getting my CDL pulled because my damn med card was up and the DOT (rightfully so) couldn't accept any more waivers for medications. I can't even drive our pickup with a commercial insurance policy on it. I'm too much of a legal liability and I refuse to put that on the company I work for. I haven't even been in a tractor, combine, or even done anything at the shop hardly at all this year. I've been alone during most of this. I'm bored as all hell. Concentration is damn near impossible along with any type of regular sleep. My days are a haze of painful physical therapy, trying to "ration" out household chores so I'll have something to do later, working on sections of my yard (and by doing so KNOWING I'm overdoing and am going to be paying dearly for it within hours), and little projects like photography, coloring books, art, reading, Netflix, etc.

Nothing can be done to speed up the shoulder healing; there's no end date to this, no timeline of expected progress. I'm on an extended "vacation" that's making me stressed, anxious, and about to go fucking crazy. I'm facing months of physical therapy yet. I used to be able to bench press 175+lbs. Attempting to bench press a simple broomstick sends me into a sweaty, shaking, exhausted mess. The mental adaption is much worse than the physical pain.

I'm craving a pack of smokes way worse than I have in my entire life. I could care less about a can of dip. I want a cool crisp morning with a cup of coffee and a glorified cancer stick dangling from my mouth while a Percocet starts to kick in. Addict brain + addictive personality + old habits creeping up and dying hard.

But I can't.
And I wont.
Caving is not an option.
Lean on your group.
Lean on a different group.
Go on chat.
Laugh in the middle of the night at a month's GroupMe antics.
Call up people from another group that have somehow become your best friends.
Scream at them. Get fucking angry at the world for awhile. Cry.
Find a vet that's been here for awhile.
Find a new quitter that's still asking those "Is this normal?" questions.
ODAAT doesn't apply just to quitting- sometimes it applies to just life in general too.

Because all of that is much more worth it than failing yourself and quit. 100 days, 200 days, etc. are all great milestones.
The worst days of my quit happened after my Hall of Fame.
It sounds daunting and hopeless, but but you're not cured at any of them. You're never cured. You learn how to deal and cope with the cravings.
You learn how to shut up the little whispers of "just one won't hurt, right?".
It's a struggle, no doubt. No one on here will lie to you about it. They shouldn't. They can't.

It gets easier, I promise.

Because as messed up as this sounds, even with the absolute shit streak I'm going through, how bad my cravings are, and how low I can get, it's easier to say "never again" today than it was at days 1, 2, 3, etc.

Sorry to hear about all the struggles that you've gone through during your quit. Being able to balance all that stress and still have the ability to stay quit is amazing and you must be incredibly strong willed! Keep it up and keep us all posted. We want to to help you as much as you have helped us!

[harvestgirl]

Day 269:

We've been celebrating March '17s quitters hitting their 2nd Floors this month. For today's roll, I asked this question:

"How many times have you tried to quit before this time?
Do you think KTC or a quit support site would have helped you earlier on?"

It spurred a conversation later on in the day, and while typing out a response in notepad to gather my thoughts, I ended up writing soemthing much more involved and not being able to stop.

It doesn't pay to think about "what ifs", but all I know is that if I did indeed had made it this far into my quit without KTC- I sure as hell wouldn't still be quit now.

I also was a combo dipper/smoker. I "quit" smoking but still smoked socially, if it was "a really bad day" as almost a treat, or if I was home alone. 269 days ago I quit all of it for good and while yes, I owe my quit first and foremost to myself, I could NOT have done it without KTC and the people I met on here.

In my intro I've stated numerous times in the past that if my words and story can help just one other person have the courage to think about quitting, quit, or stay quit, then it's worth it. The past few months have been a struggle and I really haven't been open enough about it. Part of me feels like it makes me look like I'm just begging for sympathy or some sort of applaud for staying quit. What justice does that provide for a quit? It doesn't, and that's not what I want.

What I want is to still let people know you can quit and stay quit through damn near anything if you keep your word, get involved, and ASK FOR HELP when you need it. Addiction doesn't make you weak. Events that happen out of your control don't make you weak.

Life has a funny way of working out- I was asked to conduct March right after my cousin died in a horrific tractor accident in February, along with some other family/personal events. Being a Conductor provided something for me to focus on and use as an outlet. While conducting March, we had our house fire on March 17th. My already jacked stress level sky rocketed. A week and a half later I hurt my shoulder, a week after that I was in the orthopedic's office, and the diagnoses and treatment since then has flipped my life 180 degrees.

Everything about the past few months has been a struggle. From being in near constant pain from my shoulder, to being on multiple opiate painkillers  oral steroids multiple times a day, to not being able to work, getting my CDL pulled because my damn med card was up and the DOT (rightfully so) couldn't accept any more waivers for medications. I can't even drive our pickup with a commercial insurance policy on it. I'm too much of a legal liability and I refuse to put that on the company I work for. I haven't even been in a tractor, combine, or even done anything at the shop hardly at all this year. I've been alone during most of this. I'm bored as all hell. Concentration is damn near impossible along with any type of regular sleep. My days are a haze of painful physical therapy, trying to "ration" out household chores so I'll have something to do later, working on sections of my yard (and by doing so KNOWING I'm overdoing and am going to be paying dearly for it within hours), and little projects like photography, coloring books, art, reading, Netflix, etc.

Nothing can be done to speed up the shoulder healing; there's no end date to this, no timeline of expected progress. I'm on an extended "vacation" that's making me stressed, anxious, and about to go fucking crazy. I'm facing months of physical therapy yet. I used to be able to bench press 175+lbs. Attempting to bench press a simple broomstick sends me into a sweaty, shaking, exhausted mess. The mental adaption is much worse than the physical pain.

I'm craving a pack of smokes way worse than I have in my entire life. I could care less about a can of dip. I want a cool crisp morning with a cup of coffee and a glorified cancer stick dangling from my mouth while a Percocet starts to kick in. Addict brain + addictive personality + old habits creeping up and dying hard.

But I can't.
And I wont.
Caving is not an option.
Lean on your group.
Lean on a different group.
Go on chat.
Laugh in the middle of the night at a month's GroupMe antics.
Call up people from another group that have somehow become your best friends.
Scream at them. Get fucking angry at the world for awhile. Cry.
Find a vet that's been here for awhile.
Find a new quitter that's still asking those "Is this normal?" questions.
ODAAT doesn't apply just to quitting- sometimes it applies to just life in general too.

Because all of that is much more worth it than failing yourself and quit. 100 days, 200 days, etc. are all great milestones.
The worst days of my quit happened after my Hall of Fame.
It sounds daunting and hopeless, but but you're not cured at any of them. You're never cured. You learn how to deal and cope with the cravings.
You learn how to shut up the little whispers of "just one won't hurt, right?".
It's a struggle, no doubt. No one on here will lie to you about it. They shouldn't. They can't.

It gets easier, I promise.

Because as messed up as this sounds, even with the absolute shit streak I'm going through, how bad my cravings are, and how low I can get, it's easier to say "never again" today than it was at days 1, 2, 3, etc.

[Stillamarine]

Day 202

It might be 202, but this is more a reflection on day 200.
Sometimes the support on this site amazes me. The string of text messages, the messages on GroupMe's, pm's, the "party" that was thrown in chat, the comments on this intro, etc. where overwhelming. The amount of people that posted support across different groups blew me away. December '16 (my "adopted" group) had just finished their 200 day celebration with their last quitter three days before. I posted on my table spot like I do every day, and then as a group, those sneaky Ninjas told me to answer their 200 day questions, because I was just as much a part of their group than anyone in there. February dedicatd their Message of the Day to my 200. Quitters in March posted their support on their table. It was brought up in April- I was even loaned Samrs for the day to celebrate. ;)

Sometimes I wonder if my attempts to help (talking to new quitters on chat, trying to give outlooks and perspective to fellow quitters, in general supporting people, sending out my daily promise) are worth it. I wonder if it's enough or if my efforts do help anyone. If I help one person quit or stay quit or pull them from off the ledge, then my quit is worth 10x more to me. All the shit, all the pain, all the crap that my quit caused is worth it.

Maybe it sounds selfish or egotistical, but all that support, all those personal messages and thoughts that were given to me on my 200 was a hint of validation that maybe I am worth it on here.

Still quitting one day at a time, but still quitting like a bad ass mofo. ;)

Girl you have turned into one bad ass quitter! Keep on it!

[harvestgirl]

Day 202

It might be 202, but this is more a reflection on day 200.
Sometimes the support on this site amazes me. The string of text messages, the messages on GroupMe's, pm's, the "party" that was thrown in chat, the comments on this intro, etc. where overwhelming. The amount of people that posted support across different groups blew me away. December '16 (my "adopted" group) had just finished their 200 day celebration with their last quitter three days before. I posted on my table spot like I do every day, and then as a group, those sneaky Ninjas told me to answer their 200 day questions, because I was just as much a part of their group than anyone in there. February dedicatd their Message of the Day to my 200. Quitters in March posted their support on their table. It was brought up in April- I was even loaned Samrs for the day to celebrate. ;)

Sometimes I wonder if my attempts to help (talking to new quitters on chat, trying to give outlooks and perspective to fellow quitters, in general supporting people, sending out my daily promise) are worth it. I wonder if it's enough or if my efforts do help anyone. If I help one person quit or stay quit or pull them from off the ledge, then my quit is worth 10x more to me. All the shit, all the pain, all the crap that my quit caused is worth it.

Maybe it sounds selfish or egotistical, but all that support, all those personal messages and thoughts that were given to me on my 200 was a hint of validation that maybe I am worth it on here.

Still quitting one day at a time, but still quitting like a bad ass mofo. ;)

[Rawls]

HG. Congrats on 200 days quit. (Autoed to vibrates)
Through the trials and successes there are huge rewards.
Keep up the great fight.
IQWYT.

NICE! 200! Way to go, Gurl!

Awesome job by an awesomer quitter. Even though I'm don't stop by the League daily anymore, I am constantly amazed by the grit, determination, and tenacity you possess, and by the way you coach others to possess the same. Awesome is about the perfect adjective! Proud of you.

Congrats on 200 days Harvest!! You are a great example to those of us coming behind you. Proud to quit with you!!

Congratulations HG! You're an awesome quitter

Dang.... Go girl!
Sorry I'm late, Congrats on 202.
It all gets better.
Heat -Thornes - Cross - Fruit
I Quit with you today.
Rawls 880

[JB65]

HG. Congrats on 200 days quit. (Autoed to vibrates)
Through the trials and successes there are huge rewards.
Keep up the great fight.
IQWYT.

NICE! 200! Way to go, Gurl!

Awesome job by an awesomer quitter. Even though I'm don't stop by the League daily anymore, I am constantly amazed by the grit, determination, and tenacity you possess, and by the way you coach others to possess the same. Awesome is about the perfect adjective! Proud of you.

Congrats on 200 days Harvest!! You are a great example to those of us coming behind you. Proud to quit with you!!

Congratulations HG! You're an awesome quitter

[BrianG]

HG. Congrats on 200 days quit. (Autoed to vibrates)
Through the trials and successes there are huge rewards.
Keep up the great fight.
IQWYT.

NICE! 200! Way to go, Gurl!

Awesome job by an awesomer quitter. Even though I'm don't stop by the League daily anymore, I am constantly amazed by the grit, determination, and tenacity you possess, and by the way you coach others to possess the same. Awesome is about the perfect adjective! Proud of you.

Congrats on 200 days Harvest!! You are a great example to those of us coming behind you. Proud to quit with you!!