Author Topic: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC  (Read 25923 times)

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Offline Lumberjack Tim

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #49 on: May 20, 2015, 03:14:00 PM »
Helping someone quit that's brand new here is a sigh of relief. In my group, the same guys over and over are constantly late. Chasing them down can get monotonous sometimes, but I enjoy the chase nonetheless. It's basically like hunting down an elephant with a broken leg. Sure, you're hunting an elephant, but is it really fair because of the broken leg?

Do you know what's more fun than that though? Hunting down an antelope in its prime. They aren't always the most prized trophies, but chasing them down can be the thrill of a lifetime. That's why new quitters are to me.

I can get used to this.

Offline Lumberjack Tim

  • Epic Quitter
  • ****
  • Posts: 11,015
  • Quit Date: April 09, 2015
  • Interests: Football, specifically Auburn University.Soccer, specifically Atletico Madrid.Xbox One, specifically PUBG, FIFA and Madden (Gamertag is Lumberjack Tim).I work at a waste treatment plant, so I turn turds into drinking water.
  • Likes Given: 2
Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #48 on: May 19, 2015, 02:47:00 PM »
The past two days have been extremely crappy. They're not related to my quit, just bad days on a personal level. I've been having to stay up really late to do a few things, so I've been getting a tiny amount of sleep. Monday was the worst because I only got 2-3 hours of sleep that day and then I had to go work outside in the hot sun and sweat like crazy.

But do you know what? Putting a dip never crossed my mind. The thought that I hadn't even thought of it did, but I never wanted to.

So if during an incredibly bad day I didn't go and put a dip in, then why would I ever give myself that excuse "just because"?

Also, I told my group, both on here and the app GroupMe, that I was taking the day off from KTC because I just needed a brain rest day. I was such a relief to see others really step up, not that I didn't think they would, and I knew that I didn't have anything to worry about. That helps me out a lot on a personal level because if I can do something well, and others can't, then I basically HAVE to do it for them. Call it being picky, OCD, whatever, but I didn't have to do anything yesterday, and it made me smile.

I love it here, and I'm also loving the fact that my group is so tremendous, along with the vets that help them out every now and again.

Now how about I shut up, let you read, and both of us just stay quit for the rest of the day? Sounds good to me!

Offline Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #47 on: May 18, 2015, 09:36:00 AM »
Quote from: worktowin
Quote from: Lumberjack
Quote from: worktowin
Quote from: Lumberjack
Quote from: Steakbomb18
Quote from: Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat
Quote from: Lumberjack
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.
This is really good Tim - You are getting this far quicker than I did. Quit on brother!
I haven't really read much of this intro until now, though I've seen "Lumberjack Tim" all over the place...and I think your on the way to accomplishing a goal of yours; to be the most well-known guy on the site so that the weight of the world sits on your shoulders (one of the most powerful statements I've read here).

So, LJT I'm responding now because I would be remiss if I didn't commend you on the quit you're having. You've inspired new quitters and quitters with 3,000+ days. Pretty insane when you think about it. Just a short month ago you didn't have any of this. Congratulations.

Lastly, regarding your question about looking at yourself in the mirror? Yes, I did that and I did it pretty early on. Looking at myself through the eyes of quitter for the first time in 18 years was filled an enormity of emotion. I didn't recognize that person, but I liked what I saw, and I never wanted change what I saw a that moment. And since that day, I haven't changed a thing.
Wow. Thanks y'all. You caught me on a good day. If not, if probably be crying a little reading everything haha.

Someone told me last night that I was working too much... That I needed to take some time to relax... Well, I mean, I can't. I can't relax. I'm still craving like crazy. Yesterday was a horrible day for me crave wise. If I don't drown in KTC, I'll be drowning in Skoal Xtra Mint Pouches all over again.

If I don't let people like SFGE, Keddy,Worktowin, etc know who I am... Then how will they know that the future members of this site are trying to make an impact? And along with that, who keeps them in check? If the people up top become complacent, who will they go to if everyone is in the same boat? That's another reason why I'm trying to work so hard. I'm doing that so that people up top will know that at least one person on bottom cares about them.

I may have posted this in my intro, but I have a terrible memory...
Quote from: Lumberjack
A few weeks ago, my family somehow got to talking about old smoking and dipping habits while eating Sunday lunch. My grandpa laughed about how as a kid, he would walk home and spend his bus fare on cigarettes instead.

So when a stopping point in the conversation came, I asked him "Do you still crave them? Cigarettes that is."

He paused, looked outside, and replied "Tim... I could smoke a cigarette the size of that light pole right now."
So another reason I do this is because it will always be there. That itch? It never leaves. You always have to be kept on your toes.
Every once in a while a quitter drops in here out of the blue and a star is born. Dude, what you are doing and how you are doing it is amazing. It is an honor to quit with you.

I'm coming up on 900 days. Honestly, I can't believe that number. But one day at a time... Here it comes. Let me share a few things that have happened in these days... First, posting every day works. The people that fail and come back after hall of fame ALWAYS quit posting. So, why some people are dumb fucks and quit posting (spending one minute a day) is baffling. Next, the brotherhood solidifies the promise. I've personally met about 20 peeps from this site. Had breakfast with one in Connecticut, went to a royals/tigers game with about 8 quitters in Detroit, hosted 5 quitters in Kc a few weeks ago, a great quitter and friend flew in from Calgary last year... Let me tell you, Tim... Ain't no way and I mean no way I am texting them that I failed. Not today. No way. This program works.

As far as craves, they really sucked at first. How can I live like this? Now, they are few and far between. But they do happen. And you know what, Tim? I love them. 900 days ago I was 25 years into a failure. I failed every day at one thing. And now those rare craves are slap in my face reminders that I am no longer a failure. I am quit. And I'm honored to quit with you.

Yiu are going to really like what is ahead. I promise.
I have doubt about the future. It's going to be great. It may take a while for me to get to a point where I can actually meet some of y'all, but I'm only 23. Believe it or not, but I'm incredibly socially awkward when it comes to meeting people. Once I get to know you, you'll wish I would just shit up.

And an even weirder thing about me is that even though I almost can't meet people, I'm an amazing public speaker. I just don't get nervous, and I seem to be very good at making stuff up as I go. I don't know...

So yeah. Combining my age and social anxiety, I think I'll meet y'all from a far for now.

But on to the other stuff... If you were calling me a star, then I'm floored. My dad has heard of everything that I'm doing, especially all the help I'm doling out, and he said "Man Tim! You just need to go to school to be a social worker!"

I mean... I'm helping people. It feels amazing.

If I can be totally honest and possibly off putting... Helping others is making me happier than stopping nicotine... I know that may sound weird, or it may sound wrong, but it works.

In order for me to continue making myself happy by helping everyone though, I have to stay quit. I mean, would you trust a guy who is telling you that heroin is bad for you right after he shoots up? No!

So yeah... I'm floored by the compliments... I can't even begin to tell each of you how thankful and honored I am to be told that I'm doing a great job. Hopefully one day I can say the same to someone. I'm sure there's another "star" right behind me.

Thanks y'all.
In economics there is a term called "the invisible hand theory". Essentially, helping others helps yourself sometimes. This site is the best example that I can think of that this theory is valid.

You are solidifying your commitment through helping others. Nice work. Maybe you should be an economist?
There is also the fear factor! I thought if I could grow my accountability base to a point where there was no way I could fail/cave without pissing several people off even to a point where I would be afraid that some peeps would probably show up on my door step if I failed. Well it worked and I actually enjoyed helping new quitters and befriending BAQ vets here and something else happened along the way. I found the freedom I had been looking for.

Tim, you are building accountability and from what I know about you, you would never hinder another persons quit. Failure for either one of us would do that. I can't do that and won't do that and that's the hook that I'm glad that I took. Keep doing what you are doing brother! You can and will do this.

Like W2W said, "You are going to really like what is ahead. I promise." I will second that! There are very few promises that actually pan out. This one is one of those, be patient and it will come.

Quit on!

Offline worktowin

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #46 on: May 16, 2015, 05:33:00 AM »
Quote from: Lumberjack
Quote from: worktowin
Quote from: Lumberjack
Quote from: Steakbomb18
Quote from: Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat
Quote from: Lumberjack
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.
This is really good Tim - You are getting this far quicker than I did. Quit on brother!
I haven't really read much of this intro until now, though I've seen "Lumberjack Tim" all over the place...and I think your on the way to accomplishing a goal of yours; to be the most well-known guy on the site so that the weight of the world sits on your shoulders (one of the most powerful statements I've read here).

So, LJT I'm responding now because I would be remiss if I didn't commend you on the quit you're having. You've inspired new quitters and quitters with 3,000+ days. Pretty insane when you think about it. Just a short month ago you didn't have any of this. Congratulations.

Lastly, regarding your question about looking at yourself in the mirror? Yes, I did that and I did it pretty early on. Looking at myself through the eyes of quitter for the first time in 18 years was filled an enormity of emotion. I didn't recognize that person, but I liked what I saw, and I never wanted change what I saw a that moment. And since that day, I haven't changed a thing.
Wow. Thanks y'all. You caught me on a good day. If not, if probably be crying a little reading everything haha.

Someone told me last night that I was working too much... That I needed to take some time to relax... Well, I mean, I can't. I can't relax. I'm still craving like crazy. Yesterday was a horrible day for me crave wise. If I don't drown in KTC, I'll be drowning in Skoal Xtra Mint Pouches all over again.

If I don't let people like SFGE, Keddy,Worktowin, etc know who I am... Then how will they know that the future members of this site are trying to make an impact? And along with that, who keeps them in check? If the people up top become complacent, who will they go to if everyone is in the same boat? That's another reason why I'm trying to work so hard. I'm doing that so that people up top will know that at least one person on bottom cares about them.

I may have posted this in my intro, but I have a terrible memory...
Quote from: Lumberjack
A few weeks ago, my family somehow got to talking about old smoking and dipping habits while eating Sunday lunch. My grandpa laughed about how as a kid, he would walk home and spend his bus fare on cigarettes instead.

So when a stopping point in the conversation came, I asked him "Do you still crave them? Cigarettes that is."

He paused, looked outside, and replied "Tim... I could smoke a cigarette the size of that light pole right now."
So another reason I do this is because it will always be there. That itch? It never leaves. You always have to be kept on your toes.
Every once in a while a quitter drops in here out of the blue and a star is born. Dude, what you are doing and how you are doing it is amazing. It is an honor to quit with you.

I'm coming up on 900 days. Honestly, I can't believe that number. But one day at a time... Here it comes. Let me share a few things that have happened in these days... First, posting every day works. The people that fail and come back after hall of fame ALWAYS quit posting. So, why some people are dumb fucks and quit posting (spending one minute a day) is baffling. Next, the brotherhood solidifies the promise. I've personally met about 20 peeps from this site. Had breakfast with one in Connecticut, went to a royals/tigers game with about 8 quitters in Detroit, hosted 5 quitters in Kc a few weeks ago, a great quitter and friend flew in from Calgary last year... Let me tell you, Tim... Ain't no way and I mean no way I am texting them that I failed. Not today. No way. This program works.

As far as craves, they really sucked at first. How can I live like this? Now, they are few and far between. But they do happen. And you know what, Tim? I love them. 900 days ago I was 25 years into a failure. I failed every day at one thing. And now those rare craves are slap in my face reminders that I am no longer a failure. I am quit. And I'm honored to quit with you.

Yiu are going to really like what is ahead. I promise.
I have doubt about the future. It's going to be great. It may take a while for me to get to a point where I can actually meet some of y'all, but I'm only 23. Believe it or not, but I'm incredibly socially awkward when it comes to meeting people. Once I get to know you, you'll wish I would just shit up.

And an even weirder thing about me is that even though I almost can't meet people, I'm an amazing public speaker. I just don't get nervous, and I seem to be very good at making stuff up as I go. I don't know...

So yeah. Combining my age and social anxiety, I think I'll meet y'all from a far for now.

But on to the other stuff... If you were calling me a star, then I'm floored. My dad has heard of everything that I'm doing, especially all the help I'm doling out, and he said "Man Tim! You just need to go to school to be a social worker!"

I mean... I'm helping people. It feels amazing.

If I can be totally honest and possibly off putting... Helping others is making me happier than stopping nicotine... I know that may sound weird, or it may sound wrong, but it works.

In order for me to continue making myself happy by helping everyone though, I have to stay quit. I mean, would you trust a guy who is telling you that heroin is bad for you right after he shoots up? No!

So yeah... I'm floored by the compliments... I can't even begin to tell each of you how thankful and honored I am to be told that I'm doing a great job. Hopefully one day I can say the same to someone. I'm sure there's another "star" right behind me.

Thanks y'all.
In economics there is a term called "the invisible hand theory". Essentially, helping others helps yourself sometimes. This site is the best example that I can think of that this theory is valid.

You are solidifying your commitment through helping others. Nice work. Maybe you should be an economist?

Offline Lumberjack Tim

  • Epic Quitter
  • ****
  • Posts: 11,015
  • Quit Date: April 09, 2015
  • Interests: Football, specifically Auburn University.Soccer, specifically Atletico Madrid.Xbox One, specifically PUBG, FIFA and Madden (Gamertag is Lumberjack Tim).I work at a waste treatment plant, so I turn turds into drinking water.
  • Likes Given: 2
Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #45 on: May 15, 2015, 11:55:00 PM »
Quote from: worktowin
Quote from: Lumberjack
Quote from: Steakbomb18
Quote from: Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat
Quote from: Lumberjack
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.
This is really good Tim - You are getting this far quicker than I did. Quit on brother!
I haven't really read much of this intro until now, though I've seen "Lumberjack Tim" all over the place...and I think your on the way to accomplishing a goal of yours; to be the most well-known guy on the site so that the weight of the world sits on your shoulders (one of the most powerful statements I've read here).

So, LJT I'm responding now because I would be remiss if I didn't commend you on the quit you're having. You've inspired new quitters and quitters with 3,000+ days. Pretty insane when you think about it. Just a short month ago you didn't have any of this. Congratulations.

Lastly, regarding your question about looking at yourself in the mirror? Yes, I did that and I did it pretty early on. Looking at myself through the eyes of quitter for the first time in 18 years was filled an enormity of emotion. I didn't recognize that person, but I liked what I saw, and I never wanted change what I saw a that moment. And since that day, I haven't changed a thing.
Wow. Thanks y'all. You caught me on a good day. If not, if probably be crying a little reading everything haha.

Someone told me last night that I was working too much... That I needed to take some time to relax... Well, I mean, I can't. I can't relax. I'm still craving like crazy. Yesterday was a horrible day for me crave wise. If I don't drown in KTC, I'll be drowning in Skoal Xtra Mint Pouches all over again.

If I don't let people like SFGE, Keddy,Worktowin, etc know who I am... Then how will they know that the future members of this site are trying to make an impact? And along with that, who keeps them in check? If the people up top become complacent, who will they go to if everyone is in the same boat? That's another reason why I'm trying to work so hard. I'm doing that so that people up top will know that at least one person on bottom cares about them.

I may have posted this in my intro, but I have a terrible memory...
Quote from: Lumberjack
A few weeks ago, my family somehow got to talking about old smoking and dipping habits while eating Sunday lunch. My grandpa laughed about how as a kid, he would walk home and spend his bus fare on cigarettes instead.

So when a stopping point in the conversation came, I asked him "Do you still crave them? Cigarettes that is."

He paused, looked outside, and replied "Tim... I could smoke a cigarette the size of that light pole right now."
So another reason I do this is because it will always be there. That itch? It never leaves. You always have to be kept on your toes.
Every once in a while a quitter drops in here out of the blue and a star is born. Dude, what you are doing and how you are doing it is amazing. It is an honor to quit with you.

I'm coming up on 900 days. Honestly, I can't believe that number. But one day at a time... Here it comes. Let me share a few things that have happened in these days... First, posting every day works. The people that fail and come back after hall of fame ALWAYS quit posting. So, why some people are dumb fucks and quit posting (spending one minute a day) is baffling. Next, the brotherhood solidifies the promise. I've personally met about 20 peeps from this site. Had breakfast with one in Connecticut, went to a royals/tigers game with about 8 quitters in Detroit, hosted 5 quitters in Kc a few weeks ago, a great quitter and friend flew in from Calgary last year... Let me tell you, Tim... Ain't no way and I mean no way I am texting them that I failed. Not today. No way. This program works.

As far as craves, they really sucked at first. How can I live like this? Now, they are few and far between. But they do happen. And you know what, Tim? I love them. 900 days ago I was 25 years into a failure. I failed every day at one thing. And now those rare craves are slap in my face reminders that I am no longer a failure. I am quit. And I'm honored to quit with you.

Yiu are going to really like what is ahead. I promise.
I have doubt about the future. It's going to be great. It may take a while for me to get to a point where I can actually meet some of y'all, but I'm only 23. Believe it or not, but I'm incredibly socially awkward when it comes to meeting people. Once I get to know you, you'll wish I would just shit up.

And an even weirder thing about me is that even though I almost can't meet people, I'm an amazing public speaker. I just don't get nervous, and I seem to be very good at making stuff up as I go. I don't know...

So yeah. Combining my age and social anxiety, I think I'll meet y'all from a far for now.

But on to the other stuff... If you were calling me a star, then I'm floored. My dad has heard of everything that I'm doing, especially all the help I'm doling out, and he said "Man Tim! You just need to go to school to be a social worker!"

I mean... I'm helping people. It feels amazing.

If I can be totally honest and possibly off putting... Helping others is making me happier than stopping nicotine... I know that may sound weird, or it may sound wrong, but it works.

In order for me to continue making myself happy by helping everyone though, I have to stay quit. I mean, would you trust a guy who is telling you that heroin is bad for you right after he shoots up? No!

So yeah... I'm floored by the compliments... I can't even begin to tell each of you how thankful and honored I am to be told that I'm doing a great job. Hopefully one day I can say the same to someone. I'm sure there's another "star" right behind me.

Thanks y'all.

Offline worktowin

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #44 on: May 15, 2015, 10:11:00 PM »
Quote from: Lumberjack
Quote from: Steakbomb18
Quote from: Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat
Quote from: Lumberjack
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.
This is really good Tim - You are getting this far quicker than I did. Quit on brother!
I haven't really read much of this intro until now, though I've seen "Lumberjack Tim" all over the place...and I think your on the way to accomplishing a goal of yours; to be the most well-known guy on the site so that the weight of the world sits on your shoulders (one of the most powerful statements I've read here).

So, LJT I'm responding now because I would be remiss if I didn't commend you on the quit you're having. You've inspired new quitters and quitters with 3,000+ days. Pretty insane when you think about it. Just a short month ago you didn't have any of this. Congratulations.

Lastly, regarding your question about looking at yourself in the mirror? Yes, I did that and I did it pretty early on. Looking at myself through the eyes of quitter for the first time in 18 years was filled an enormity of emotion. I didn't recognize that person, but I liked what I saw, and I never wanted change what I saw a that moment. And since that day, I haven't changed a thing.
Wow. Thanks y'all. You caught me on a good day. If not, if probably be crying a little reading everything haha.

Someone told me last night that I was working too much... That I needed to take some time to relax... Well, I mean, I can't. I can't relax. I'm still craving like crazy. Yesterday was a horrible day for me crave wise. If I don't drown in KTC, I'll be drowning in Skoal Xtra Mint Pouches all over again.

If I don't let people like SFGE, Keddy,Worktowin, etc know who I am... Then how will they know that the future members of this site are trying to make an impact? And along with that, who keeps them in check? If the people up top become complacent, who will they go to if everyone is in the same boat? That's another reason why I'm trying to work so hard. I'm doing that so that people up top will know that at least one person on bottom cares about them.

I may have posted this in my intro, but I have a terrible memory...
Quote from: Lumberjack
A few weeks ago, my family somehow got to talking about old smoking and dipping habits while eating Sunday lunch. My grandpa laughed about how as a kid, he would walk home and spend his bus fare on cigarettes instead.

So when a stopping point in the conversation came, I asked him "Do you still crave them? Cigarettes that is."

He paused, looked outside, and replied "Tim... I could smoke a cigarette the size of that light pole right now."
So another reason I do this is because it will always be there. That itch? It never leaves. You always have to be kept on your toes.
Every once in a while a quitter drops in here out of the blue and a star is born. Dude, what you are doing and how you are doing it is amazing. It is an honor to quit with you.

I'm coming up on 900 days. Honestly, I can't believe that number. But one day at a time... Here it comes. Let me share a few things that have happened in these days... First, posting every day works. The people that fail and come back after hall of fame ALWAYS quit posting. So, why some people are dumb fucks and quit posting (spending one minute a day) is baffling. Next, the brotherhood solidifies the promise. I've personally met about 20 peeps from this site. Had breakfast with one in Connecticut, went to a royals/tigers game with about 8 quitters in Detroit, hosted 5 quitters in Kc a few weeks ago, a great quitter and friend flew in from Calgary last year... Let me tell you, Tim... Ain't no way and I mean no way I am texting them that I failed. Not today. No way. This program works.

As far as craves, they really sucked at first. How can I live like this? Now, they are few and far between. But they do happen. And you know what, Tim? I love them. 900 days ago I was 25 years into a failure. I failed every day at one thing. And now those rare craves are slap in my face reminders that I am no longer a failure. I am quit. And I'm honored to quit with you.

Yiu are going to really like what is ahead. I promise.

Offline Lumberjack Tim

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #43 on: May 15, 2015, 11:37:00 AM »
Quote from: Steakbomb18
Quote from: Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat
Quote from: Lumberjack
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.
This is really good Tim - You are getting this far quicker than I did. Quit on brother!
I haven't really read much of this intro until now, though I've seen "Lumberjack Tim" all over the place...and I think your on the way to accomplishing a goal of yours; to be the most well-known guy on the site so that the weight of the world sits on your shoulders (one of the most powerful statements I've read here).

So, LJT I'm responding now because I would be remiss if I didn't commend you on the quit you're having. You've inspired new quitters and quitters with 3,000+ days. Pretty insane when you think about it. Just a short month ago you didn't have any of this. Congratulations.

Lastly, regarding your question about looking at yourself in the mirror? Yes, I did that and I did it pretty early on. Looking at myself through the eyes of quitter for the first time in 18 years was filled an enormity of emotion. I didn't recognize that person, but I liked what I saw, and I never wanted change what I saw a that moment. And since that day, I haven't changed a thing.
Wow. Thanks y'all. You caught me on a good day. If not, if probably be crying a little reading everything haha.

Someone told me last night that I was working too much... That I needed to take some time to relax... Well, I mean, I can't. I can't relax. I'm still craving like crazy. Yesterday was a horrible day for me crave wise. If I don't drown in KTC, I'll be drowning in Skoal Xtra Mint Pouches all over again.

If I don't let people like SFGE, Keddy,Worktowin, etc know who I am... Then how will they know that the future members of this site are trying to make an impact? And along with that, who keeps them in check? If the people up top become complacent, who will they go to if everyone is in the same boat? That's another reason why I'm trying to work so hard. I'm doing that so that people up top will know that at least one person on bottom cares about them.

I may have posted this in my intro, but I have a terrible memory...
Quote from: Lumberjack
A few weeks ago, my family somehow got to talking about old smoking and dipping habits while eating Sunday lunch. My grandpa laughed about how as a kid, he would walk home and spend his bus fare on cigarettes instead.

So when a stopping point in the conversation came, I asked him "Do you still crave them? Cigarettes that is."

He paused, looked outside, and replied "Tim... I could smoke a cigarette the size of that light pole right now."
So another reason I do this is because it will always be there. That itch? It never leaves. You always have to be kept on your toes.

Offline Steakbomb18

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #42 on: May 15, 2015, 11:17:00 AM »
Quote from: Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat
Quote from: Lumberjack
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.
This is really good Tim - You are getting this far quicker than I did. Quit on brother!
I haven't really read much of this intro until now, though I've seen "Lumberjack Tim" all over the place...and I think your on the way to accomplishing a goal of yours; to be the most well-known guy on the site so that the weight of the world sits on your shoulders (one of the most powerful statements I've read here).

So, LJT I'm responding now because I would be remiss if I didn't commend you on the quit you're having. You've inspired new quitters and quitters with 3,000+ days. Pretty insane when you think about it. Just a short month ago you didn't have any of this. Congratulations.

Lastly, regarding your question about looking at yourself in the mirror? Yes, I did that and I did it pretty early on. Looking at myself through the eyes of quitter for the first time in 18 years was filled an enormity of emotion. I didn't recognize that person, but I liked what I saw, and I never wanted change what I saw a that moment. And since that day, I haven't changed a thing.
Certified Grade A Badass

Offline Sand_Fleas_Gotta_Eat

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #41 on: May 15, 2015, 09:08:00 AM »
Quote from: Lumberjack
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.
This is really good Tim - You are getting this far quicker than I did. Quit on brother!

Offline worktowin

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #40 on: May 15, 2015, 05:51:00 AM »
Quote from: pab1964
Quote from: Lumberjack
I would like to add this in to my intro, because I am so proud of my group. My group has become a part of me, basically an extended family, so like any proud family member would do, I'm gonna show off something awesome that they did...
Quote from: Lumberjack
WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!

Tonight, Doho reached out to me. He was at a brewery for his birthday (happy birthday btw) and he was really struggling and needed a cigarette. I was unfortunately in a tough situation to truly support him, so I sent him a quick text basically saying "DON'T DO IT!" and sent his number to many of you Jackals.

As I became a little less busy, I check my phone again to see that he had turned down the cigarettes!!!!!

But do you know what's even better than that???

He said that at least 10 people reached out to him!!! AT LEAST TEN PEOPLE!!!!

Because of all of you, we made sure that we didn't leave a fellow Jackal. I want to thank all of you who were able to reach out and I want to say that I love the bond we all have in here, especially the bond that shows me that we can all reach out for support, while also reaching out and giving it.

I'M SO PROUD TO BE A JACKAL!!!!
You damn jackals are a good bunch! Proud to be quit with you all!
This is what this site is all about. We failed alone. We win as a team.

Nicely done Tim.

Offline pab1964

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #39 on: May 14, 2015, 11:13:00 PM »
Quote from: Lumberjack
I would like to add this in to my intro, because I am so proud of my group. My group has become a part of me, basically an extended family, so like any proud family member would do, I'm gonna show off something awesome that they did...
Quote from: Lumberjack
WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!

Tonight, Doho reached out to me. He was at a brewery for his birthday (happy birthday btw) and he was really struggling and needed a cigarette. I was unfortunately in a tough situation to truly support him, so I sent him a quick text basically saying "DON'T DO IT!" and sent his number to many of you Jackals.

As I became a little less busy, I check my phone again to see that he had turned down the cigarettes!!!!!

But do you know what's even better than that???

He said that at least 10 people reached out to him!!! AT LEAST TEN PEOPLE!!!!

Because of all of you, we made sure that we didn't leave a fellow Jackal. I want to thank all of you who were able to reach out and I want to say that I love the bond we all have in here, especially the bond that shows me that we can all reach out for support, while also reaching out and giving it.

I'M SO PROUD TO BE A JACKAL!!!!
You damn jackals are a good bunch! Proud to be quit with you all!
Tobacco is so addictive it took me a year after a massive heart attack, in which doctor confirmed caused from dipping to finally put a lid on the bitch! ODAAT EDD

Offline Lumberjack Tim

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  • Quit Date: April 09, 2015
  • Interests: Football, specifically Auburn University.Soccer, specifically Atletico Madrid.Xbox One, specifically PUBG, FIFA and Madden (Gamertag is Lumberjack Tim).I work at a waste treatment plant, so I turn turds into drinking water.
  • Likes Given: 2
Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #38 on: May 14, 2015, 10:37:00 PM »
I would like to add this in to my intro, because I am so proud of my group. My group has become a part of me, basically an extended family, so like any proud family member would do, I'm gonna show off something awesome that they did...
Quote from: Lumberjack
WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!

Tonight, Doho reached out to me. He was at a brewery for his birthday (happy birthday btw) and he was really struggling and needed a cigarette. I was unfortunately in a tough situation to truly support him, so I sent him a quick text basically saying "DON'T DO IT!" and sent his number to many of you Jackals.

As I became a little less busy, I check my phone again to see that he had turned down the cigarettes!!!!!

But do you know what's even better than that???

He said that at least 10 people reached out to him!!! AT LEAST TEN PEOPLE!!!!

Because of all of you, we made sure that we didn't leave a fellow Jackal. I want to thank all of you who were able to reach out and I want to say that I love the bond we all have in here, especially the bond that shows me that we can all reach out for support, while also reaching out and giving it.

I'M SO PROUD TO BE A JACKAL!!!!

Offline Lumberjack Tim

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  • Quit Date: April 09, 2015
  • Interests: Football, specifically Auburn University.Soccer, specifically Atletico Madrid.Xbox One, specifically PUBG, FIFA and Madden (Gamertag is Lumberjack Tim).I work at a waste treatment plant, so I turn turds into drinking water.
  • Likes Given: 2
Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #37 on: May 14, 2015, 12:38:00 PM »
So right now, I'm sitting in the butler building at work. I don't know if this type of building is called a butler building, but that's what it's always been called around here. It's a big open metal building with two big roll up doors. The inside contains lawnmowers and stuff, and also some chairs that we sit in from time to time.

Well anyways, I'm just sitting here and one of my coworkers puts in a big pinch of Copenhagen... Now, normally, this would prompt me to take out my Skoal and put four pouches in... But not today.

Today, I realized how disgusting I was, and how disgusting my coworker is right now.

Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror as you put a dip in? No? Well Quasimodo is more attractive than someone's "Let me put come cancer into my mouth!" face.

Do you remember what you did after you put that cancer in? More than likely, you wiped your fingers off on your jeans or something like that. Did you ever really look at your fingertips? They're absolutely terrible. You have gunk all over them, and for what? To chase that high that you received the first time? To fit in? To make your jaw stop hurting? No matter what your reason was, it's not worth it.

But the kicker for all of this is that we have a drain inside the butler building that we would all spit in. Well (let's call him Doug) Doug isn't close to that drain. So what does he do? He holds it all in. It looks like he's about to just vomit out tobacco juic. Why would anyone do that??? The even worse part?? He decides not to spit, and instead just chug it all with the Dr. Pepper that he was holding in his hand. I almost gagged.

Today has been another "lesson" as to why I need to stay quit. I knew it was disgusting, I knew it was bad for me, but the realization of just how volatile I was being to myself just now hit me.

I was a monster. I was a deviant. I was gross. I was selfish. I was all of these things.

But above all else? I was, no, I AM an addict, and I need to remind myself daily why I need to remember that. I can't degrade my health like that again. I will stay strong, and I will stay quit.

Offline Lumberjack Tim

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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #36 on: May 11, 2015, 04:20:00 PM »
I went to the dentist today! I go twice a year anyways, so I wasn't too worried.

Prognosis?

Perfect teeth and my gums are almost back at full health. Yaaaaay!!!!!

Offline Lumberjack Tim

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  • Interests: Football, specifically Auburn University.Soccer, specifically Atletico Madrid.Xbox One, specifically PUBG, FIFA and Madden (Gamertag is Lumberjack Tim).I work at a waste treatment plant, so I turn turds into drinking water.
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Re: I quit dipping 27 days ago, new to KTC
« Reply #35 on: May 09, 2015, 12:43:00 AM »
Quote from: worktowin
Quote from: Nolaq
Nice 30, LJT.
You are a different lumberjack than you were 30 days ago. Well done.
And your life is infinitely greater since meeting me. You're welcome.