Well another milestone, but this one celebrated a bit differently...
This site has transformed a lot of lives through battling nicotine addiction. Winning that fight daily has led many to tackle other issues in their lives as evidenced by the "getting my act together" group. Everything from drugs to alcohol to weight loss to porn to all sorts of other daily struggles that many of us have. We are here because we have addictive personalities and we have come to see that those addictions carry over to lots of aspects of our lives that we never realized. I personally struggle with porn and lust like the neighborhood wino might struggle with his alcohol addiction. I'm on the porn quit group and I'm over two months porn free. I've lost about 40 pounds and have more in sight to lose. But this weekend, I was hit over the head with something that would turn my whole life around. And it all started on KTC.
April 2018, I drove to Midwest Meet at the
@ReWire abode and never once thought about how this connection with this man would transform my life. You see, I was going to a quit meet to meet up with some badass quitters. Over 20 of the biggest and best in the quit business would be there, and I think there was over 60 years of quit represented, but to be fair,
@Big Brother Jack contributed to a lot of that. Others in the big quit numbers group like
@Kdip @bronc @Nomore1959 @Missouri Mike @cbird65 @danojeno @worktowin and a whole host of others would be in attendance. I had a cooler of beer and a badass attitude. I brought my 4 wheeler and rode it around on the trails. I got pretty drunk Saturday night. As Reuben (rewire) told his brother this last weekend, they had to edit out all the pictures where I flipped the bird nearly every time somebody got a camera out. It pains me to see that video of quit days in my first meet. I was larger than life on the boards, and was really determined to prove that I was just the same in real life. I was...full of craziness...and easily the most obnoxious person at that meet. But I met Rewire and his family. I rubbed elbows with some of the KTC greats and I maintained contact as my quit progressed.
Two months before that meet up, Reuben had attended his first men's encounter. I had no idea at the time what that was, but what I did know is that it must have been horrible because the Midwest meet went from a wild drinking party with skeet shooting and all kinds of craziness planned to a fairly tame event as it progressed. I figured Men's encounter was some sort of crazy Christian cult but was glad that Reuben decided to go ahead with the meet up. It was fun. I think me and
@Bgbdbrd were the only ones that got drunk, but it was still fun. That is what fun was to me at the time. Oh man, what life has in store.
Fast forward to Midwest Meet #2. What a difference a year makes. A lot of people bailed and there were only a handful of us that went. I thought Reuben was Mormon, the same sort of fallacy that made me think that Michael was a tow truck driver. I had been with the love of my life for a couple months, and she's a devout Christian. She brought me back to the church, which I had denounced after my divorce back in 2014. When I say denounced, I mean I really drove a stake into it. I talked smack about Christianity and probably drove a fair amount of people away. I know I didn't strengthen anybody in their walk with God. So she brought me back to the light, but I was Christian Lite as I'd probably put it now. I was still rowdy, still struggled with lust and with porn and with doing whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. We slept in separate places. Purity was important to her and I supported her in that. We hung out with Reuben and his family. They rubbed off a little and their life started to look pretty good. Then on Sunday, when we were starting to get ready to leave, he started talking to me about this Men's Encounter thing.
I was a little insulted and a little cold to the idea. What in the world did Reuben see in me that would make him think I needed that? I was already displaying purity and I knew a couple of bible verses. I remembered his change from Men's Encounter the previous year and that frankly scared the heck out of me. I was ready to go to church because church makes you feel good, but was I ready for real change? The answer was no. So over the next couple months, he'd send me a message now and then. I'd blow him off. And then his bride sent my girlfriend a message. Now she was pushing me to go. And so, reluctantly, I went. I didn't even get on the website to see what it was all about. I looked at the packing list, threw some stuff in a bag and went. And on the drive up there, I decided that if I was going to drive 7 hours by myself in Nowhere, Missouri to a thing I knew nothing about, I was going to open my heart and milk it for everything it was worth.
When I arrived, I knew Reuben and nobody else. He sat with me while I ate and answered a few questions I had. I went in blindly and was immediately staggered by the amount of men there. There were 688 of us and we spent 48 hours in fellowship with each other. We ate together, we bunked together, we shared things that I never thought I'd tell anybody. I unpacked all the baggage I'd been storing in my life and nailed it to the cross of life. I emptied myself out, and then I filled myself with truth and light. I didn't want to leave when it was through. I stuck around for another hour afterward and watched two men that I'd gotten to know get baptized. And I rededicated my life to Christ. I can see the spiritual warfare all around me now for what it is. I can see all the obstacles that were put in my way that almost kept me away from Men's Encounter. I can see all the God things too and how he pursued me when the time was right. I can see all these things and so much more.
So what's next? Well the old Broc is gone, I can tell you that. I've already started to make amends with those in my life and those on the boards. I hope to be a light instead of well meaning darkness. I have a song in my mouth and some truth on my tongue. Daily worship, prayer, and learning is in the cards. I met some great people that I will stay in contact with. Loving people instead of driving them away. And I will be at Men's Encounter Jan 24-26. If you'd like to join me, say the word. The verse of the weekend is Ephesians 5:1.
"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery"
It's what I wish for me, but it's also what I wish for each and every person reading this. Find the light, and run toward it.
Bryan
