Today I quit. Tomorrow, I'll quit again. (A journey through one man's recovery)

[wildirish317]

Fences

Day 79

I hate fences! Always have, always will. I'm too old to climb the damn things any more.

? Metaphorical fences?

Yeah, sort of. I've been asked (or told) to leave a couple of different "months" now. Funny how people circle the wagons. We've even done it with #Junited, but that was more in defense against Swilderbeast and his vileness. I don't know that we've ever asked or demanded someone from another month stop contributing.

I'm okay with it. Saddened, but okay. Like I said, this is a well traveled road. People will continue to quit (and cave) whether I contribute or not. It was fun while it lasted though. I've leaned heavy on this site to get me through this 80 day period. It's time that I learn to function in society with less reliance.

So, I'm sticking to June 2016 for any comments I may have about quitting, addiction, or recovery. I'll still post roll with other groups though. Especially the older ones. I think they appreciate the company.

[kubiackalpha]

Fences

Day 79

I hate fences! Always have, always will. I'm too old to climb the damn things any more.

? Metaphorical fences?

[wildirish317]

Fences

Day 79

I hate fences! Always have, always will. I'm too old to climb the damn things any more.

[danojeno]

Answering the three questions - Reprise

I am now at day 77. Two months ago, I posted some thoughts in here about how cavers should go about answering the three questions. These thoughts were based on what I had learned about addiction and caving to that point. Not having caved, I can't, and don't ever want to, speak from experience. That's a major reason why I'm so interested in the subject of addiction and relapse. It's too late for me to prevent the addiction, but I can prevent relapse, if I learn how to do it.

So what have I learned recently about caving (relapse)?

Relapse is a process, it's not an event.

It's actually a three step process, consisting of the following:

Emotional relapse.
Mental relapse.
Physical relapse.

In emotional relapse, you're not thinking about using. But your emotions and behaviors are setting you up for a possible relapse in the future.

The signs of emotional relapse are:

• Anxiety
• Intolerance
• Anger
• Defensiveness
• Mood swings
• Isolation
• Not asking for help
• Not going to meetings (or not posting on KTC)
• Poor eating habits
• Poor sleep habits

These signs sound familiar? Go back a few posts and read about post acute withdrawal symptoms. Seriously, learn to relax. Make sure you have others you can share this with. Recognizes these symptoms for what they are. You are moving in the direction of a cave.

If you don't get yourself turned away from caving during your emotional relapse, you will move into mental relapse.

In mental relapse there's a war going on in your mind. Part of you wants to use, but part of you doesn't. In the early phase of mental relapse you're just idly thinking about using. But in the later phase you're definitely thinking about using.

The signs of mental relapse are:

• Thinking about people, places, and things you used with
• Glamorizing your past use
• Lying
• Hanging out with old using friends
• Fantasizing about using
• Thinking about relapsing
• Planning your relapse around other people's schedules

It gets harder to make the right choices as the pull of addiction gets stronger. If you don't catch yourself here, you will cave.

When you get the craving, play it through in your mind. Get past the cave and imagine what life then looks like. Remember posting day 1. Remember the suck. Remember how you felt when you initially tossed your can and posted day 1. That's where you will be. It will be like you never quit, because you didn't quit, you stopped.

Reach out. This is the time to open your contacts list and text or call someone and let them know what's going on with you.

Distract yourself. Go for a walk. Get on KTC and go to the Wildcard section and play "This or That", "One Word Post", or "Count to a Million".

Get through the next 30 minutes. Promise yourself to wait 30 minutes before using or buying nicotine, and then wait.

Remember one day at a time. Promise yourself you will get through today. Then go on KTC and post a promise to get through today. Post and ghost, if you have to. Just make that promise.

Do something that relaxes you (assuming this is not alcohol or drugs).

If you don't do something like mentioned above, and get yourself turned around during the mental relapse, you will find yourself in the car on the way to get nicotine. At this point, you will cave.

So, how does this change my advice on answering the three questions? The answers to the three questions lie much earlier in the caving process than I originally suspected. "What happened?" should describe the mental relapse. "Why did it happen?" should examine how the caver moved from emotional relapse into mental relapse. What will change? What will the caver change to recognize when he/she is in emotional relapse and GTFO? Nothing changes, if nothing changes.

It's pretty amazing how this stuff plays out. Unfortunately I can relate down to the letter. Thanks for sharing.

[wildirish317]

Answering the three questions - Reprise

I am now at day 77. Two months ago, I posted some thoughts in here about how cavers should go about answering the three questions. These thoughts were based on what I had learned about addiction and caving to that point. Not having caved, I can't, and don't ever want to, speak from experience. That's a major reason why I'm so interested in the subject of addiction and relapse. It's too late for me to prevent the addiction, but I can prevent relapse, if I learn how to do it.

So what have I learned recently about caving (relapse)?

Relapse is a process, it's not an event.

It's actually a three step process, consisting of the following:

Emotional relapse.
Mental relapse.
Physical relapse.

In emotional relapse, you're not thinking about using. But your emotions and behaviors are setting you up for a possible relapse in the future.

The signs of emotional relapse are:

• Anxiety
• Intolerance
• Anger
• Defensiveness
• Mood swings
• Isolation
• Not asking for help
• Not going to meetings (or not posting on KTC)
• Poor eating habits
• Poor sleep habits

These signs sound familiar? Go back a few posts and read about post acute withdrawal symptoms. Seriously, learn to relax. Make sure you have others you can share this with. Recognizes these symptoms for what they are. You are moving in the direction of a cave.

If you don't get yourself turned away from caving during your emotional relapse, you will move into mental relapse.

In mental relapse there's a war going on in your mind. Part of you wants to use, but part of you doesn't. In the early phase of mental relapse you're just idly thinking about using. But in the later phase you're definitely thinking about using.

The signs of mental relapse are:

• Thinking about people, places, and things you used with
• Glamorizing your past use
• Lying
• Hanging out with old using friends
• Fantasizing about using
• Thinking about relapsing
• Planning your relapse around other people's schedules

It gets harder to make the right choices as the pull of addiction gets stronger. If you don't catch yourself here, you will cave.

When you get the craving, play it through in your mind. Get past the cave and imagine what life then looks like. Remember posting day 1. Remember the suck. Remember how you felt when you initially tossed your can and posted day 1. That's where you will be. It will be like you never quit, because you didn't quit, you stopped.

Reach out. This is the time to open your contacts list and text or call someone and let them know what's going on with you.

Distract yourself. Go for a walk. Get on KTC and go to the Wildcard section and play "This or That", "One Word Post", or "Count to a Million".

Get through the next 30 minutes. Promise yourself to wait 30 minutes before using or buying nicotine, and then wait.

Remember one day at a time. Promise yourself you will get through today. Then go on KTC and post a promise to get through today. Post and ghost, if you have to. Just make that promise.

Do something that relaxes you (assuming this is not alcohol or drugs).

If you don't do something like mentioned above, and get yourself turned around during the mental relapse, you will find yourself in the car on the way to get nicotine. At this point, you will cave.

So, how does this change my advice on answering the three questions? The answers to the three questions lie much earlier in the caving process than I originally suspected. "What happened?" should describe the mental relapse. "Why did it happen?" should examine how the caver moved from emotional relapse into mental relapse. What will change? What will the caver change to recognize when he/she is in emotional relapse and GTFO? Nothing changes, if nothing changes.

[kubiackalpha]

P.A.W.S. has been known to cause relapse in those unsuspecting few. The know-it-alls. The I have this down and done in 30days. Or those that plan on leaving a self help, accountability group such as this. Glad you posted this. I know this site has a place for all if not a lot of this information. Some of it gets buried deep due to years of use. Which is a good sign that this site works! But, I wonder if a knew cataloguing system isn't due so it is easier to navigate....especially with The Suck and Fog.

Part of it is the process of discovery, for me at least. If it were all laid out on a table like a buffet, I probably would skip most of it. You know how they post all of those links in the roll when they start a new month? I didn't even pay attention to that after the first day. (If you look at August's roll, you can see where I put a broad proclamation above these links that says "Check out these links below - valuable information".)

See, I guess that is where I am lacking. I have 99% of this information in my head and when I make a statement like my head hurts people assume I don't know that it is more than likely from The Suck. But, I do know. That is why I guess I see a cataloguing system needs revamped while those that are not in my head don't. I know I can equate it to what you do. When my friend was at Oklahoma State for his ME I went to the library with him and we went to the engineering section (HUMONGOUS). I just grabbed books and started reading. I was a kid in a Candy Store not knowing more than that I had an interest in engineering. You would probably just find the book you need and be done with it.

[wildirish317]

P.A.W.S. has been known to cause relapse in those unsuspecting few. The know-it-alls. The I have this down and done in 30days. Or those that plan on leaving a self help, accountability group such as this. Glad you posted this. I know this site has a place for all if not a lot of this information. Some of it gets buried deep due to years of use. Which is a good sign that this site works! But, I wonder if a knew cataloguing system isn't due so it is easier to navigate....especially with The Suck and Fog.

Part of it is the process of discovery, for me at least. If it were all laid out on a table like a buffet, I probably would skip most of it. You know how they post all of those links in the roll when they start a new month? I didn't even pay attention to that after the first day. (If you look at August's roll, you can see where I put a broad proclamation above these links that says "Check out these links below - valuable information".)

[wildirish317]

How to Survive Post-Acute Withdrawal

I feel much better than I did yesterday. I'm still in the funk, but coming out. More from the linked page of yesterday, with my comments interspersed.

Be patient. You can't hurry recovery. But you can get through it one day at a time. If you resent post-acute withdrawal, or try to bulldoze your way through it, you will become exhausted. And when you're exhausted you will think of using to escape. One day at a time. We see this a lot.

Post-acute withdrawal symptoms are a sign that your brain is recovering. Therefore don't resent them. But remember, even after one year, you are still only half way there. (Two focking years. 'facepalm'' )

Go with the flow. Withdrawal symptoms are uncomfortable. But the more you resent them the worse they'll seem. You'll have lots of good days over the next two years. Enjoy them. You'll also have lots of bad days. On those days, don't try to do too much. Take care of yourself, focus on your recovery, and you'll get through this.

Practice self-care. Give yourself lots of little breaks over the next two years. Tell yourself "what I am doing is enough." Be good to yourself. That is what most addicts can't do, and that's what you must learn in recovery. Recovery is the opposite of addiction.

Sometimes you'll have little energy or enthusiasm for anything. Understand this and don't over book your life. Give yourself permission to focus on your recovery. This is key. We used nicotine to help us push ourselves. Now we have to learn not to push - and let it happen.

Post-acute withdrawal can be a trigger for relapse. You'll go for weeks without any withdrawal symptoms, and then one day you'll wake up and your withdrawal will hit you like a ton of bricks. You'll have slept badly. You'll be in a bad mood. Your energy will be low. And if you're not prepared for it, if you think that post-acute withdrawal only lasts for a few months, or if you think that you'll be different and it won't be as bad for you, then you'll get caught off guard. But if you know what to expect you can do this.

Being able to relax will help you through post-acute withdrawal. When you're tense you tend to dwell on your symptoms and make them worse. When you're relaxed it's easier to not get caught up in them. You aren't as triggered by your symptoms which means you're less likely to relapse.

Remember, every relapse, no matter how small undoes the gains your brain has made during recovery. Without abstinence everything will fall apart. With abstinence everything is possible. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)

I hear a lot of cavers say they reached a "fuck it" point when they caved. I always wondered what "fuck it" is and how someone would find themselves there. Maybe this is it. PAWS (Post Acute Withdrawal Symptoms). Be on guard for this shite. It can be powerful, and the nic bitch follows in on its heels, waiting for you to get to "fuck it".

[kubiackalpha]

P.A.W.S. has been known to cause relapse in those unsuspecting few. The know-it-alls. The I have this down and done in 30days. Or those that plan on leaving a self help, accountability group such as this. Glad you posted this. I know this site has a place for all if not a lot of this information. Some of it gets buried deep due to years of use. Which is a good sign that this site works! But, I wonder if a knew cataloguing system isn't due so it is easier to navigate....especially with The Suck and Fog.

[wildirish317]

It's not for you to discern the way it is received.

It is for Herself to discern. I always knew She is a woman, and suspect She's a teenager.

[danojeno]

The Symptoms of Post Acute Withdrawal

Why am I doing this? Why am I posting shit on a random thread buried so deep in a random website that nobody other than myself will find it, much less read it? I used to think I was helping other people like me. Fock that. There are no other people like me, and everything I post on this thread is old news. This website is about 11 years old, and there have been 12 groups go through this process in each of the 11 years, so this path has been traveled at least 132 times. I don't have anything new to add.

I guess, like my good friend Kubiackalpha stated earlier today, "Writing is therapeutic." So I'm finished writing for a moment. Let me just post some juicy "old news" from the site I linked above.

The most common post-acute withdrawal symptoms are:

• Mood swings
• Anxiety
• Irritability
• Tiredness
• Variable energy
• Low enthusiasm
• Variable concentration
• Disturbed sleep

Post-acute withdrawal feels like a rollercoaster of symptoms. In the beginning, your symptoms will change minute to minute and hour to hour. Later as you recover further they will disappear for a few weeks or months only to return again. As you continue to recover the good stretches will get longer and longer. But the bad periods of post-acute withdrawal can be just as intense and last just as long.

Each post-acute withdrawal episode usually last for a few days. Once you've been in recovery for a while, you will find that each post-acute withdrawal episode usually lasts for a few days. There is no obvious trigger for most episodes. You will wake up one day feeling irritable and have low energy. If you hang on for just a few days, it will lift just as quickly as it started. After a while you'll develop confidence that you can get through post-acute withdrawal, because you'll know that each episode is time limited.

Post-acute withdrawal usually lasts for 2 years. This is one of the most important things you need to remember. If you're up for the challenge you can get though this. But if you think that post-acute withdrawal will only last for a few months, then you'll get caught off guard, and when you're disappointed you're more likely to relapse. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)

Wait, wat??? TWO FOCKING YEARS?!?!?

I don't have two years. I can only do this for today. I can only do this for myself. Bless you Kubiackalpha, I'm depressed too.

Again, old hat, old news to most of you. I would spare you, and put it somewhere else, but you don't have to read it.

I remember when I was a kid, the first time I realized that the sun didn't actually land on that field way over there. Great focking discovery for me!! Everyone else around me already knew this. This is how I feel on this site.

Hopefully, I'll look back at this post TWO FOCKING YEARS from now and think "My God, why did I post that shite?"

You should always post things as they come to you. Don't overthink it. So someone else has written something similar, or stated the same thing. Doesn't matter. Someone may come read this that hasn't read it before, ever. Some new guy or old hat may come read what you've written, and relate, or have a revelation. I too believe it is therapeutic for the author, but still can be beneficial to the reader.

It's not for you to discern the way it is received. Yours is to be a member of this group, this family. Glad you are part of my "family". Keep it up.

Woah woah woah. Keep it up brother. I'd much rather read it with your spin.

[ChickDip]

The Symptoms of Post Acute Withdrawal

Why am I doing this? Why am I posting shit on a random thread buried so deep in a random website that nobody other than myself will find it, much less read it? I used to think I was helping other people like me. Fock that. There are no other people like me, and everything I post on this thread is old news. This website is about 11 years old, and there have been 12 groups go through this process in each of the 11 years, so this path has been traveled at least 132 times. I don't have anything new to add.

I guess, like my good friend Kubiackalpha stated earlier today, "Writing is therapeutic." So I'm finished writing for a moment. Let me just post some juicy "old news" from the site I linked above.

The most common post-acute withdrawal symptoms are:

• Mood swings
• Anxiety
• Irritability
• Tiredness
• Variable energy
• Low enthusiasm
• Variable concentration
• Disturbed sleep

Post-acute withdrawal feels like a rollercoaster of symptoms. In the beginning, your symptoms will change minute to minute and hour to hour. Later as you recover further they will disappear for a few weeks or months only to return again. As you continue to recover the good stretches will get longer and longer. But the bad periods of post-acute withdrawal can be just as intense and last just as long.

Each post-acute withdrawal episode usually last for a few days. Once you've been in recovery for a while, you will find that each post-acute withdrawal episode usually lasts for a few days. There is no obvious trigger for most episodes. You will wake up one day feeling irritable and have low energy. If you hang on for just a few days, it will lift just as quickly as it started. After a while you'll develop confidence that you can get through post-acute withdrawal, because you'll know that each episode is time limited.

Post-acute withdrawal usually lasts for 2 years. This is one of the most important things you need to remember. If you're up for the challenge you can get though this. But if you think that post-acute withdrawal will only last for a few months, then you'll get caught off guard, and when you're disappointed you're more likely to relapse. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)

Wait, wat??? TWO FOCKING YEARS?!?!?

I don't have two years. I can only do this for today. I can only do this for myself. Bless you Kubiackalpha, I'm depressed too.

Again, old hat, old news to most of you. I would spare you, and put it somewhere else, but you don't have to read it.

I remember when I was a kid, the first time I realized that the sun didn't actually land on that field way over there. Great focking discovery for me!! Everyone else around me already knew this. This is how I feel on this site.

Hopefully, I'll look back at this post TWO FOCKING YEARS from now and think "My God, why did I post that shite?"

You should always post things as they come to you. Don't overthink it. So someone else has written something similar, or stated the same thing. Doesn't matter. Someone may come read this that hasn't read it before, ever. Some new guy or old hat may come read what you've written, and relate, or have a revelation. I too believe it is therapeutic for the author, but still can be beneficial to the reader.

It's not for you to discern the way it is received. Yours is to be a member of this group, this family. Glad you are part of my "family". Keep it up.

[wildirish317]

The Symptoms of Post Acute Withdrawal

Why am I doing this? Why am I posting shit on a random thread buried so deep in a random website that nobody other than myself will find it, much less read it? I used to think I was helping other people like me. Fock that. There are no other people like me, and everything I post on this thread is old news. This website is about 11 years old, and there have been 12 groups go through this process in each of the 11 years, so this path has been traveled at least 132 times. I don't have anything new to add.

I guess, like my good friend Kubiackalpha stated earlier today, "Writing is therapeutic." So I'm finished writing for a moment. Let me just post some juicy "old news" from the site I linked above.

The most common post-acute withdrawal symptoms are:

• Mood swings
• Anxiety
• Irritability
• Tiredness
• Variable energy
• Low enthusiasm
• Variable concentration
• Disturbed sleep

Post-acute withdrawal feels like a rollercoaster of symptoms. In the beginning, your symptoms will change minute to minute and hour to hour. Later as you recover further they will disappear for a few weeks or months only to return again. As you continue to recover the good stretches will get longer and longer. But the bad periods of post-acute withdrawal can be just as intense and last just as long.

Each post-acute withdrawal episode usually last for a few days. Once you've been in recovery for a while, you will find that each post-acute withdrawal episode usually lasts for a few days. There is no obvious trigger for most episodes. You will wake up one day feeling irritable and have low energy. If you hang on for just a few days, it will lift just as quickly as it started. After a while you'll develop confidence that you can get through post-acute withdrawal, because you'll know that each episode is time limited.

Post-acute withdrawal usually lasts for 2 years. This is one of the most important things you need to remember. If you're up for the challenge you can get though this. But if you think that post-acute withdrawal will only last for a few months, then you'll get caught off guard, and when you're disappointed you're more likely to relapse. (Reference: www.AddictionsAndRecovery.org)

Wait, wat??? TWO FOCKING YEARS?!?!?

I don't have two years. I can only do this for today. I can only do this for myself. Bless you Kubiackalpha, I'm depressed too.

Again, old hat, old news to most of you. I would spare you, and put it somewhere else, but you don't have to read it.

I remember when I was a kid, the first time I realized that the sun didn't actually land on that field way over there. Great focking discovery for me!! Everyone else around me already knew this. This is how I feel on this site.

Hopefully, I'll look back at this post TWO FOCKING YEARS from now and think "My God, why did I post that shite?"

[kubiackalpha]

The Road Called Recovery

Day 65. If I didn't know any better, I would say I'm "cured". However, I do know better. I am through withdrawal, and moving down the road they call recovery. The trick now is to stay on this road and not get sidetracked into relapse.

So, I've mastered the Law of Addiction. My addiction is arrested. I'm through the withdrawal, the suck. I'm on the road of recovery. Now what? How do I stay on this road?

The first rule to recovery is: You don't recover from an addiction by stopping using. You recover by creating a new life where it is easier to not use.
If you don't create a new life, the Nic bitch will lure you back into using her.

There are tools to help us create a new life. You can find them at www.addictionsandrecovery.org. I want to discuss them briefly here because they are important.

The three tools are:

1. Avoid high risk situations.
2. Learn to relax.
3. Be honest.

Some common high risk situations are described by the acronym HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired). You can't always avoid these situations, but learn to recognize them and be on guard for the Nic bitch, because she's watching and waiting.

We used nicotine to relax. We need to find something to replace that. Drugs and alcohol are not your best choice, as these are addictive substances as well. Meditation is a good tool for relaxation. KTC has a good thread on meditation: Meditation Group. It has a good beginning, morphs into a roll post, and then has some more tips and tricks at the end. I also tie flies to relax. My mother played the piano to relax. (I used to think she just liked to play. Now I realize she would do it when she was upset.)

The following is a direct quote from linked web page. I can't think of a good way to summarize it, and there are a lot of important points about being honest.

An addiction requires lying. You have to lie about getting your drug, using it, hiding its consequences, and planning your next relapse. An addiction is full of lying. By the time you've developed an addiction, lying comes easily to you. After a while you get so good at lying that you end up lying to yourself. That's why addicts don't know who they are or what they believe in.

The other problem with lying is that you can't like yourself when you lie. You can't look yourself in the mirror. Lying traps you in your addiction. The more you lie, the less you like yourself, which makes you want to escape, which leads to more using and more lying.

Nothing changes, if nothing changes. Ask yourself this: will more lying, more isolating, and more of the same make you feel better? The expression in AA is - nothing changes if nothing changes. If you don't change your life, then why would this time be any different? You need to create a new life where it's easier to not use.

Recovery requires complete honesty. You must be one-hundred percent completely honest with the people who are your supports: your family, your doctor, your therapist, the people in your 12 step group, and your sponsor. If you can't be completely honest with them, you won't do well in recovery.

When you're completely honest you don't give your addiction room to hide. When you lie you leave the door open to relapse.

One mistake people make in the early stages of recovery is they think that honesty means being honest about other people. They think they should share what's "wrong" with other people. But recovery isn't about fixing other people. It's about fixing yourself. Stick with your own recovery. Focusing on what you don't like about others is easy because it deflects attention from yourself.

Honesty won't come naturally in the beginning. You've spent so much time learning how to lie that telling the truth, no matter how good it is for you, won't feel natural. You'll have to practice telling the truth a few hundred times before it comes a little easier. In the beginning, you'll have to stop yourself as you're telling a story, and say, "now that I think about it, it was more like this..."

Show common sense. Not everybody is your best friend. And not everybody will be glad to know that you have an addiction or that you're doing something about it. There may be some people who you don't want to tell about your recovery. But don't be reluctant to tell the people close to you about your recovery. You should never feel ashamed that you're doing something about your addiction.

LOVE IT! My friend would say that as addicts in recovery we need to keep something in mind "First Thought Wrong" . Meaning anytime we are faced with a decision tough or not we think then rethink.

[wildirish317]

The Road Called Recovery

Day 65. If I didn't know any better, I would say I'm "cured". However, I do know better. I am through withdrawal, and moving down the road they call recovery. The trick now is to stay on this road and not get sidetracked into relapse.

So, I've mastered the Law of Addiction. My addiction is arrested. I'm through the withdrawal, the suck. I'm on the road of recovery. Now what? How do I stay on this road?

The first rule to recovery is: You don't recover from an addiction by stopping using. You recover by creating a new life where it is easier to not use.
If you don't create a new life, the Nic bitch will lure you back into using her.

There are tools to help us create a new life. You can find them at www.addictionsandrecovery.org. I want to discuss them briefly here because they are important.

The three tools are:

1. Avoid high risk situations.
2. Learn to relax.
3. Be honest.

Some common high risk situations are described by the acronym HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired). You can't always avoid these situations, but learn to recognize them and be on guard for the Nic bitch, because she's watching and waiting.

We used nicotine to relax. We need to find something to replace that. Drugs and alcohol are not your best choice, as these are addictive substances as well. Meditation is a good tool for relaxation. KTC has a good thread on meditation: Meditation Group. It has a good beginning, morphs into a roll post, and then has some more tips and tricks at the end. I also tie flies to relax. My mother played the piano to relax. (I used to think she just liked to play. Now I realize she would do it when she was upset.)

The following is a direct quote from linked web page. I can't think of a good way to summarize it, and there are a lot of important points about being honest.

An addiction requires lying. You have to lie about getting your drug, using it, hiding its consequences, and planning your next relapse. An addiction is full of lying. By the time you've developed an addiction, lying comes easily to you. After a while you get so good at lying that you end up lying to yourself. That's why addicts don't know who they are or what they believe in.

The other problem with lying is that you can't like yourself when you lie. You can't look yourself in the mirror. Lying traps you in your addiction. The more you lie, the less you like yourself, which makes you want to escape, which leads to more using and more lying.

Nothing changes, if nothing changes. Ask yourself this: will more lying, more isolating, and more of the same make you feel better? The expression in AA is - nothing changes if nothing changes. If you don't change your life, then why would this time be any different? You need to create a new life where it's easier to not use.

Recovery requires complete honesty. You must be one-hundred percent completely honest with the people who are your supports: your family, your doctor, your therapist, the people in your 12 step group, and your sponsor. If you can't be completely honest with them, you won't do well in recovery.

When you're completely honest you don't give your addiction room to hide. When you lie you leave the door open to relapse.

One mistake people make in the early stages of recovery is they think that honesty means being honest about other people. They think they should share what's "wrong" with other people. But recovery isn't about fixing other people. It's about fixing yourself. Stick with your own recovery. Focusing on what you don't like about others is easy because it deflects attention from yourself.

Honesty won't come naturally in the beginning. You've spent so much time learning how to lie that telling the truth, no matter how good it is for you, won't feel natural. You'll have to practice telling the truth a few hundred times before it comes a little easier. In the beginning, you'll have to stop yourself as you're telling a story, and say, "now that I think about it, it was more like this..."

Show common sense. Not everybody is your best friend. And not everybody will be glad to know that you have an addiction or that you're doing something about it. There may be some people who you don't want to tell about your recovery. But don't be reluctant to tell the people close to you about your recovery. You should never feel ashamed that you're doing something about your addiction.