License Plates
California
Now I'm from California so I can talk shit about it.
First of all what is up with the gay cursive writing.
It screams Fag Francisco all over it.
Like some gay fairy saying in a flamboyant voice "Hey everyone! Come to California"
The golden state should have something bad ass for it's license plates. Like John Muir giving the middle finger to the O'Shaugnessy Dam.
Or a miner from 1849 with a fat gold nugget in one hand and a bottle of canadian whiskey in the other.
But red cursive is just gay.
Oregon
One tree.
Really? One tree??
The beaver state should have something better than that. Like a big hairy beaver.
I'm not talking about those little furry woodland creatures that gnaw down trees and dam rivers. I mean a big hairy pussy on it's license plates.
That would adequately describe how everyone in Portland and every subaru driver out there drives. Like a BIG HAIRY PUSSY!
Washington
I love Washington. I just moved here in October.
Mt. Rainier is pretty cool, but I've got a more bad ass idea for a license plate.
Mount Saint Helens erupting.
Underneath it instead of saying "The Evergreen State"
It would read:
"Don't come to Washington; When it's not raining volcanoes are erupting"
British Columbia
Most of you probably haven't seen these license plates but I live in Whatcom County which shares it's northern border with british columbia.
Just come to the Bellingham Costco, Mall, or Wal Mart and you will see a plague of canadians.
Their License plates say "Beautiful British Columbia" (GAY, and who would want to be associated with the British??)
Some of them say underneath "The Greatest Place on Earth"
Quick question, if BC is so fucking beautiful and the greatest place on earth why are you all over here??
The difference between canadians and americans is that we had the balls to give the British a big fucking middle finger and to tell them to fuck off. The canadians were bitches to the british.
Montana
My dad's from great falls, I have a lot of family here.
This is for you Grandpa D. (R.I.P.)
The sky is NOT any bigger in Montana than in any other state. When you come across from Wyoming the sky doesn't magically get bigger.
Big Sky Country, MY ASS
It's the treasure state, damn it!!
Idaho
"Scenic Idaho"
"Famous Potatoes"
Good job, Idaho... Because really that's all they're good for.
Nevada
The Silver State.
If California is the golden state then the only way nevada would win silver is if they were in the special olympics.
I don't feel like adding more, but you can guys add on to this list. Add on some east coast states if you'd like.