My good cave

[Wt57]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it.  Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it.  Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you.  I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings.  I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth.  I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts. 
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that.  I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked!  Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man.  My first smoke was to be cool like him.  The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822".  I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco.  I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band.  We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly.  I own my worthless decision to use tabacco!  I can't blame anyone else.  I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have!  I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail.  I know better, today I can quit!  I will continue to quit today.  Remember there is "no tommorrow only today".  When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too

So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.

Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.

They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)

Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.

Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.

People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.

US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.

If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?

I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.

There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.

Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.

Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.

It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!

To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?

I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?

Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!

Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?

My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.

However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry.  Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!

Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.

Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.

The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.

'clap'

That fires me up! We all are quit today and are winners Take your filthy lucre soaked in your dead and addicted customers blood and tears and live with what you did to line your pockets!

US Tobacco...No more!!!! I see you for what you do. You are not blameless. I will not surrender to my addiction. My money will never become yours again. NEVER.

'Finger'

I think I get it! I get it! The pied piper had a lot more involvement in my addiction that I ever recognized. Tabacco sucks ass, I hate everything about tabacco and how my addiction stole my life. This discussion has changed my attitude dramatically. I still own my childish decision to cave to peer pressure, and foolish curiosity. I wish I could reach out to every young teen and tell them my story and how fucked up my life has been because of some poison in a can with a shinny lid! I can't reach a lot of kids but I am a scout master and work with young boys at church. They will hear from me the evils of tabacco ever chance I get as will my grandchildren!! There are a lot of evil thing in the world that suduce us and steal little bits of our lives from us if we let them. If we let them! that is the key, we are all here because we have let ourselves to be controlled (enslaved) by this poison! I have no problem hating UST, they are definitely an evil placed out there to lure uneducated, unsuspecting victims into there clutches! I have my ideas about their role in the world, but the only thing that is important is that we never give into them ever again and always take opportunities to educate others!

[Mthomas3824]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it.  Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it.  Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you.  I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings.  I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth.  I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts. 
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that.  I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked!  Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man.  My first smoke was to be cool like him.  The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822".  I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco.  I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band.  We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly.  I own my worthless decision to use tabacco!  I can't blame anyone else.  I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have!  I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail.  I know better, today I can quit!  I will continue to quit today.  Remember there is "no tommorrow only today".  When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too

So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.

Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.

They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)

Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.

Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.

People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.

US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.

If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?

I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.

There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.

Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.

Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.

It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!

To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?

I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?

Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!

Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?

My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.

However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!

Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.

Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.

The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.

'clap'

That fires me up! We all are quit today and are winners! Take your filthy lucre soaked in your dead and addicted customers blood and tears and live with what you did to line your pockets!

US Tobacco...No more!!!! I see you for what you do. You are not blameless. I will not surrender to my addiction. My money will never become yours again. NEVER.

'Finger'

[Notdeadyet]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it.  Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it.  Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you.  I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings.  I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth.  I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts. 
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that.  I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked!  Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man.  My first smoke was to be cool like him.  The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822".  I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco.  I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band.  We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly.  I own my worthless decision to use tabacco!  I can't blame anyone else.  I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have!  I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail.  I know better, today I can quit!  I will continue to quit today.  Remember there is "no tommorrow only today".  When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too

So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.

Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.

They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)

Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.

Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.

People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.

US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.

If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?

I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.

There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.

Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.

Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.

It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!

To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?

I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?

Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!

Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?

My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.

However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!

Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.

Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.

The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.

[Mthomas3824]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it.  Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it.  Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you.  I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings.  I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth.  I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts. 
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that.  I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked!  Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man.  My first smoke was to be cool like him.  The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822".  I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco.  I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band.  We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly.  I own my worthless decision to use tabacco!  I can't blame anyone else.  I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have!  I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail.  I know better, today I can quit!  I will continue to quit today.  Remember there is "no tommorrow only today".  When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too

So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.

Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.

They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)

Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.

Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.

People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.

US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.

If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?

I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.

There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.

Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.

Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.

It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!

To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?

I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?

Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!

Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?

My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.

However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!

Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.

[Wt57]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it.  Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it.  Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you.  I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings.  I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth.  I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts. 
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that.  I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked!  Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man.  My first smoke was to be cool like him.  The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822".  I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco.  I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band.  We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly.  I own my worthless decision to use tabacco!  I can't blame anyone else.  I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have!  I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail.  I know better, today I can quit!  I will continue to quit today.  Remember there is "no tommorrow only today".  When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too

So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.

Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.

They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)

Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.

Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.

People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.

US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.

If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?

I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.

There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.

Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.

Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.

It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!

To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?

I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?

Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!

[Mthomas3824]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it.  Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it.  Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you.  I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings.  I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth.  I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts. 
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that.  I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked!  Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man.  My first smoke was to be cool like him.  The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822".  I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco.  I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band.  We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly.  I own my worthless decision to use tabacco!  I can't blame anyone else.  I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have!  I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail.  I know better, today I can quit!  I will continue to quit today.  Remember there is "no tommorrow only today".  When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too

So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.

Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.

They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)

Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.

Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.

People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.

US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.

If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?

I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.

There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.

Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.

Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.

It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!

To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?

I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?

[bis-cut]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too

[Wt57]

Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!

[Scowick65]

Day 153.  A good day to report on my quit.  This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago.  But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago. 
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'

Well said WT

'boob' 'boob' 'boob'

Nice job WT! 'clap'

Good stuff brother!

yes sir.. freedom at last.. quit with you all day long.....

Friends, he is spot on. Quitting can change your life. This badass can help. He knows exactly how.

[kana]

Day 153.  A good day to report on my quit.  This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago.  But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago. 
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'

Well said WT

'boob' 'boob' 'boob'

Nice job WT! 'clap'

Good stuff brother!

yes sir.. freedom at last.. quit with you all day long.....

[Grizzly25]

Day 153.  A good day to report on my quit.  This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago.  But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago. 
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'

Well said WT

'boob' 'boob' 'boob'

Nice job WT! 'clap'

Good stuff brother!

[T-Cell]

Day 153.  A good day to report on my quit.  This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago.  But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago. 
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'

Well said WT

'boob' 'boob' 'boob'

Nice job WT! 'clap'

[tinman]

Day 153.  A good day to report on my quit.  This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago.  But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago. 
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'

Well said WT

'boob' 'boob' 'boob'

[Wt57]

Day 153.  A good day to report on my quit.  This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago.  But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago. 
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'

[Wt57]

My attitude tonight has taken a turn downhill. I need to vent! We often blame shitty feelings on our quitting nicotine and the reprogramming or withdrawal, sometimes that is true! Many times it's not. Nicotine may be a distant reason for my feelings tonight in that it has been my life for so Long but our personalities are what they are with or without nicotine. If a person is a prick in life they probably are with or without nicotine, if your a loser you probably are with or without and so on! Learning to live without nicotine is one thing but changing who you are is a much more difficult process. Some of who I am, I like. But then there are some core things about me I disdain! Changing the minor character flaws is very possible with effort and time but changing my core character is another thing! Over the past 142 days I've shed a shitload of dirty laundry I've aired much of it very publicly and have overcome much of it. I've witnessed others do the same. It really sucks admitting our weaknesses and secret history! The past few days I discovered for Me writing down my demons or a public admission of things I want to get rid of helps me put them into the past. There are things that that just doesn't work with but having someone close enough to share those feelings with is possibly the only way to rid yourself of them. That is what friendship is about. It's interesting that a group of mostly strangers can develop that kind of relationship but I have felt it! In my day to day life I have friends that I share experiences with but i would never share some of the things I've shared with this group. Some burdens I don't even share with my wife. (right or wrong I don't) So why the downhill slide tonight? I don't know but I hope I can discover what I need to do to improve my attitude! I'm hopeful that my reaching out to others will lead me down the path to my recovery. Again what I'm dealing with isn't nic related and my quit is definitely not in danger I just needed to vent out loud! In reality no one even needs to read this or respond it is my way of talking through my feelings.