Dave,
You have been called out, challenged, and supported by numerous people. The onus is now on you to come back and prove people right that you can do this the right way and prove people wrong that you quit at quitting.Â
I hope, for your sake, that you make the right decision.
dippin dave-
Either get all the way in or GTFO. You can be a bad ass quitter, but it won't happen until you drink the kool aide, follow the KTC recipe AND man up and be honest with yourself. Get over your anger at fellow quitters, channel it toward your real foe which is nicotine...
I've been watching you Dave. I've seen you post 6 straight days. I believe that you are on board. Reading the more recent comments, I get why you are pissed off. Channel that anger. Use the nasty comments to fuel your quit.
DD911... You need to buckle down and get serious here. Part of that is admitting that by doing it on your own you caved quicker than a good dump takes. What's it gonna be dude!?
I hope that you find your niche to quit. It may even be here. I have seen wierder things happen. But you are in need of a severe attitude change.
When I first joined KTC, I was a special butterfly. I did not take my quit seriously. I did not 100% want to quit, and the small amount that I did, was not for myself. For 5 days I played the KTC game. I posted roll, I posted in my intro, sometimes multiple times per day. I made use of Live Chat and I got contacts. That seems pretty convincing, no? Thats the problem. I got lost in a "game" that I had no intention of following through with.
Since I didnt care if I passed or failed, I went right back to dipping. Then I stopped posting roll. Then i stopped posting my intro. Then I stopped posting. Im not going to go into it again. Im tired of looking through my intro just to see all this drama.
I want to share something that happened at work today. It made me open my eyes to what has been going on this whole time that ive been too blind and ignorant to see.
I work in a factory. My line (department) has 10 people, each running their own machine. There are 4 of us that get along like best friends. We dont know each other beyond that we work together. We are a team. We dont work on the same machine together, but through our teamwork we indirectly help each other. Anyway,
Today two people called out. One was not a problem. The second one was one of our group. He said he would be in late. As the night progressed, we learned that he would not be in at all. He probably will not have a job, as he calls in quite often. But he is still part of our group. A stranger. Yet I would gladly do anything I could to help him. Even though he works a different machine, the three of us (on three separate machines) worked below average.
Its no different with KTC. And im just seeing it now. Before I laughed (and if you go back far enough you will find that post) at the thought of opening up my heart to strangers. Or helping another stranger open their hearts. But it all makes sense now. Different as we may be, we are still the same. We are all addicts. A lawyer is not much help for an addict. But an addict can be a great help. (Last two paragraphs sounded much better in my head...deal with it)
Moral of the story:
You really cant go at it alone. Take away your support and its just you. What happens if you fall? Your not getting up on your own. If you try, and ill tell you from experience, you will only succeed in digging a very deep hole. Atleast use the buddy system. Get atleast one other person to run with you. The more the merrier. Strangers or life long friends, you dont want to get caught by yourself.
So what are you going to do differently now? What is your quit plan? I didnt see anything addressing that.....
DD911,
Believe it or not, no one here wants you to fail again. There has been a lot of good advice given to you here and in Chat. If you were unwanted you would be ignored.
Answering the three questions is important to do. Thoughtful, deep, meaningful answers will not only help you to dig in for this long fight, but will also help others. Being combative will get you nowhere, whether you start or just feed it with a response. Getting involved on KTC in constructive ways will strengthen your quit and reestablish your credibility over time.
I'm probably one of those mean guys you are talking about. And I'm not going to go all warm and fuzzy on you yet. But Evil is absolutely right, no one wants to see you fail here.
I read your answers to the three questions and your other posts and can't help but see addict speak all over them still. Because I am an addict, I know it when I see it. We've not yet seen much evidence that you are approaching this quit much differently than before. Your answers to the 3 questions show little promise of a quit being built. If you think simply posting roll most days (or every day) and not investing in the other tools will keep you quit, you haven't been paying attention.
I'm glad you are posting.Lose the attitude, spend time learning all the tools KTC has to offer. Use them.
Try to focus on the real quitters rather than the special butterflies, the butterflies rarely stick around long...
Quit better.
Dave, you don't just get to go back to day 1. You have to tell us what happened, why, what you will do different this time. We need to believe you when you tell us that you are quit. It's what this entire website is built around.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
1. What happened? I "caved". Five days into a half-assed quit, I did what most people would call caving. Im calling it starting back up after a short break. If I was as committed to my quit as I told everyone, myself included that I was, THAT would have been caving.
2. Why did it happen? I was not fully commited to my quit. I did not 100% take that
step leap. I did not use my contacts and I abused the chat system. I was not ready to quit.
3. What am I doing differently this time? I have posted roll for 7 days straight. I am going to resume my journal (intro) where I left off before the drama. I utilize chat every night when I get home from work. I text a few of my contacts daily, even if its just to say HELLO. I am going to take my quit One Day At A Time and QLF! I am going to pay it forward and post in other peoples intros. I wanted to make sure I was fully onboard and serious before doing so.
I want to give back to others that which was given to me. I regret not taking this seriously before now.
I am quit with ParadigmDawg and all of November. Hell, Im quit with everyone!
