So I have the house to myself for a few days... Wife took kids to Syracuse to see the in-laws last night. I worked late last night so no biggie I came home showered had dinner, and went to bed. Woke up today and had to do some shopping for the wife. Got home around 12:30 and worked out hard (weights, push-ups, 8 mile bike ride) for 1.5 hours. Then I showered and went for a 90 minute massage; awesome! Felling great I went and bought a couple of pounds of PEI muscles and a rack of lamb to make for dinner. I made beer muscles and ate them then lite my grill, and then the craves hit! My usual method is to get angry like the hulk at the nic bitch and smack her down, but this time it was the red hulk and the abombanation coming at me and the craves would not stop! "just go to a different c-store no one needs to know, you don't need to tell you can be 46 tomorrow, just some dip for tonite while no one is here...". I would rather cheat on my wife nic! But still the bitch was wisperin'... This persistence had not happened b4 in my quit... Usually the nic bitch saw my disgust and resolve and pissed off, but not today, and I had been having such a good day! I had been pitying every fool slave I saw using nic all day, and I was having a me day! The nic bitch knew I was winning... So I could have caved, but instead I stuck to my plan, and sent a txt to one of my KTC brothers, and b4 I could txt another my hero came through... I don't know if J.F. wants me to name him, but he saved me from a nasty cave, and I am thankful. He reminded me of all the quit shit I have been spouting, and that I needed to get on KTC immediately. I Hit the live chat and J.F. joined me shortly thereafter, and AppleJack (who had been involved in my quit since day 1((coinkidink???I don't think so))) was the only other quitter there with me. I could not possibly cave with J.F. dropping whatever he was doing to help me and Applejack (again we dipped apple skoal so he was the second quitter to post on my intro thread and one of my quit heroes) being there... Other quit ledgends soon joined live chat, and J.F. helped me figure out what was the cause of my strongest crave so far: I had my first 'ME' day. I was being productive, worked out hard, and was spending some of the money I had not spent on poison since I quit, on myself... J.F. said some of his worst craves came not on his bad days, but his good days! One more reason I f'ing hate the bitch: the best day of my quit is when she hit me the hardest! First time I needed to use those #s I had stockpiled, and I still saved slamming my junk in the desk drawer as my ace in the hole (hope I never need that one, but it would be better than caving!). nic can hit you anytime harder than you think, but if you use the KTC tools you will not cave! Do not be afraid to reach out to your brothers and sisters when you need help! I WOULD HAVE CAVED TONITE IF I WAS ON MY OWN! Thanks J.F. You are my hero (in a completely un GHEY way... think of me as a little girl whos kitten was stuck in a tree and J.F. as Superman... Wait that sounds even GHEYER... LOL love you man and looking forward to +1ing and quitting again in the A.M..
