Quitting

[Thumblewort]

Does KTC even do the 3 questions for cavers anymore, or is that a thing of the past? I'D LOVE it a mod chimed in on this.............

FMBM, you started out so well, and we had each others backs, what happened? You have my digits, never heard a word about your cave, or your new quit. Answer the tough questions and get on board man.

The 3 questions are a practice in this community, not a requirement. I can't think of anyone offhand who didn't answer them, but I can think of many who threw out half ass responses and needed "encouragement" to offer answers that matter. FMBM's initial answer to question number 3 as I recall was lacking. The usual answer to this question is "get more involved" as it seems the majority of cavers aren't involved pre-cave. It can't be said in this case because by pretty much all accounts Steve was involved, though I think it waned toward the end. I can't speak for him, but it seems that at some point, he was overcome with quit malaise, a very dangerous form of fuck-its.

Thank you Dano, I just wanted to make sure they got asked, I couldn't see where or if they were. It seems like the importance of those questions has waned, especially on a person who threw away nearly a year of stoppage for nothing. Anyone over 2 years agree with that?

[Doc2quit4good]

When any of us learns that all of a sudden we can't quit for one damn day no matter how long they have been quit it is a bad day for all of us. We are all addicts here. Noone can decide one day that they are not. I think I speak for most here when I say this site is meant for zero tolerance, period. That is how so many are still posting another day and not day ones... After a long time here now there still isn't one damn day that goes by that I don't think about my addiction so I will be back here every damn day!!!

[pky1520]

Poof

[pky1520]

And guys, I want to clarify - I'm not trying to excuse his cave. It's not acceptable and it deserves to be called out. Any cave weakens the support network on this board, and anyone who breaks their word needs to go through a reckoning if they want to rebuild trust. My point is that I respect the courage it takes to admit a mistake, come back and start from scratch. I think FM has experience and value to add to our quit group and its my hope that he does his best to rebuild that trust in the August group.

[pky1520]

Hey man, wanted to reach out to you because I just spent the last hour reading about your journey with KTC and your cave. First of all, I don't judge you for the cave. After reading your intro, and then seeing the fallout, I'm sure you judge yourself plenty.

Honestly, I have a huge amount of respect for the fact that you could come back, post a day one, join a newb group and ask for help. I truly don't know if I could handle myself like that after a cave.

Protocol at this site seems to be to tear down and shame - and I get that. There is value to the whole in terms of setting an example, but I don't think it does anything for an individual. That you were able to man up, take the lumps and start fresh shows fortitude and a serious commitment to the quit that should be supported and emulated, rather than disparaged.

As a member of August, my hope is that you will take both your successes and failures and help our group become more aware of the pitfalls that await us. You have obviously learned a lot from your previous attempt and I hope that you can use those lessons to help us all reach 100 and then 1 year and then the comma together. I quit with you today, I'll quit with you tomrrow. Keep focused and stay quit.

[danojeno]

Does KTC even do the 3 questions for cavers anymore, or is that a thing of the past? I'D LOVE it a mod chimed in on this.............

FMBM, you started out so well, and we had each others backs, what happened? You have my digits, never heard a word about your cave, or your new quit. Answer the tough questions and get on board man.

The 3 questions are a practice in this community, not a requirement. I can't think of anyone offhand who didn't answer them, but I can think of many who threw out half ass responses and needed "encouragement" to offer answers that matter. FMBM's initial answer to question number 3 as I recall was lacking. The usual answer to this question is "get more involved" as it seems the majority of cavers aren't involved pre-cave. It can't be said in this case because by pretty much all accounts Steve was involved, though I think it waned toward the end. I can't speak for him, but it seems that at some point, he was overcome with quit malaise, a very dangerous form of fuck-its.

[Dagranger]

I'm not a ball buster about the three questions....but I personally feel I put in a lot of time reading and responding to a lot of your posts...and you involved so many people in your quit, you owe it to all of us who gave a shit about you to explain yourself.

[Thumblewort]

Does KTC even do the 3 questions for cavers anymore, or is that a thing of the past? I'D LOVE it a mod chimed in on this.............

FMBM, you started out so well, and we had each others backs, what happened? You have my digits, never heard a word about your cave, or your new quit. Answer the tough questions and get on board man.

[danojeno]

I'm not one of those guys that believes everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we just fuck ourselves on purpose. I don't know why you fucked yourself, but the only thing keeping you from un-fucking it is you. We are all here doing it one day at a time and so can you. In my own case, after returning, I felt like shit every day rehashing everything. Slowly, day by day, that negativity turned positive as I built a foundation and formed a brotherhood with my group. Somehow, the trust in me returned and coming here became a source of energy. I hope you take the time to read back through this intro...it's the reason I joined this site.

Thanks Dano. I appreciate your support and continued effort with me. It hasn't gone unnoticed and I value your opinion. I've been on KTC everyday since posting my promise and I'm not as active as I was the first time around with regards to posting but I'm still reading a lot and finding my way. It's great to hear that others were helped even though I ultimately failed.

As for reading back through this intro, there will be the right time to do it and I know it's going to be of value when it's needed.

The only promise right now is the daily promise.

Don't give up on me yet Dano- I've still got some fight left and hopefully I can provide some support and/or inspiration along the way

I know it's awkward for a bit, but each day stoke that fire just a little bit more. Twigs and leaves at first but after awhile, it will rage. You have lots of guys pulling for you big time.

[FMBM707]

Thanks for sharing, Steve. Read the first page of your intro last night and decided to join. Read the rest now and much of it seems like it could have been written by me. Last time I thought I was dying back in 07 I went to ENT and all came back clean. I don't know how long it took, but after a clean bill of health I started again. I'm a genius. From what I've read, you are better than that. I quit.

Apparently I'm not.

[FMBM707]

I'm not one of those guys that believes everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we just fuck ourselves on purpose. I don't know why you fucked yourself, but the only thing keeping you from un-fucking it is you. We are all here doing it one day at a time and so can you. In my own case, after returning, I felt like shit every day rehashing everything. Slowly, day by day, that negativity turned positive as I built a foundation and formed a brotherhood with my group. Somehow, the trust in me returned and coming here became a source of energy. I hope you take the time to read back through this intro...it's the reason I joined this site.

Thanks Dano. I appreciate your support and continued effort with me. It hasn't gone unnoticed and I value your opinion. I've been on KTC everyday since posting my promise and I'm not as active as I was the first time around with regards to posting but I'm still reading a lot and finding my way. It's great to hear that others were helped even though I ultimately failed.

As for reading back through this intro, there will be the right time to do it and I know it's going to be of value when it's needed.

The only promise right now is the daily promise.

Don't give up on me yet Dano- I've still got some fight left and hopefully I can provide some support and/or inspiration along the way

[danojeno]

I'm not one of those guys that believes everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we just fuck ourselves on purpose. I don't know why you fucked yourself, but the only thing keeping you from un-fucking it is you. We are all here doing it one day at a time and so can you. In my own case, after returning, I felt like shit every day rehashing everything. Slowly, day by day, that negativity turned positive as I built a foundation and formed a brotherhood with my group. Somehow, the trust in me returned and coming here became a source of energy. I hope you take the time to read back through this intro...it's the reason I joined this site.

[Tuco]

I was traveling yesterday and just hit up the intro board. Not wanting to believe what Diesel and Griz wrote, I went to Oct 2014's page. Man, was that a punch in my face and kick to the nuts. Sure, I ain't an October Titan, but I sure as hell have been quitting day in and day out with you since your first weeks.

I'm pretty F'n pissed and now I have an idea about how much you valued your quit brothers; people like myself and those in your Quit group. And to that I say, so be it. I don't need nor want decrepit stones in my castle of quit.

Leave it to Steak to find the words that I could not.

Two fucking weeks shy of hitting a year, and this is allowed to happen. Unreal.

[Thumblewort]

While I am saddened by this cave, it only makes my quit stronger. I hope you find what you are looking for FMBM.

[rdad]

I don't need nor want decrepit stones in my castle of quit.

Amen Steak, Amen