My friends, I'm overwhelmed tonight as I read all your comments. I was in that tractor most of the day Mark and didn't log on much after posting roll this morning, so I missed that all of you had been posting in my intro. As I write this I'm just a couple hours away from my actual quit time, April 1, 2012 1:18 am. I've thought a lot about why my emotions were what they were. I honestly believe the 3 days between joining KTC and quitting was my time of awakening. I knew as I sat by the toilet and dumped my last 3 cans, this time was different. I believe I knew deep down I was beginning my true recovery. Initially I thought 100 days of posting would have me cured.
After reaching HOF I recognized I had a long way to go but couldn't see myself posting roll for 1 year. As time passed I saw far to many post HOF caves. I posted 100% for that first year and then as I started my 2nd year I thought I should test myself and stopped posting for a short period of time but realized that my subconscious addicted mind still Fantasized about slipping back into my daily routine. Taking a few minutes each morning is a very small price to pay for my freedom. Each of us pick and choose our level of participation online. Some post support in all groups others hang in chat offering support there. We all decide what works for us. For me, I try to check the intros for new quitters and welcome them. Often I lend my support till they get established and start finding their support in their group. I don't consider anything about my quit special or different, it's just what gives me encouragement and opportunity to pay forward the support I received.
Tonight as I reminisce the past 2 years I realize I've grown more and learned more about WT than the previous 55 years of life. I now know that everyday I must do a self evaluation and watch for my character weaknesses and work on correcting them right away.
9 months ago I joined a 12 step addiction recovery program that supplements my KTC experience. As I begin year 3, I don't anticipate much of a change. I'm beginning my 3rd time through my 12 step program, I'll still be posting roll with the July 2012 Brothers of Quit (BOQ) and the 2012 quitters. I'm also still not drinking pop.
One of the great things about my quit is the date, my quit wasn't a April fools joke and it never will be a joke as long as I make today my priority.
Today, April Fools Day, we joke and pull pranks but we don't mess around with our quit. We post roll, make a promise and keep our word!
Thanks again everyone! You have saved my life.
