Almost there... Quit Date Dec 31st 2013

[pbrain04]

FUCK OFF AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY MIND BITCH. I WILL NEVER LISTEN TO YOUR VOICE OR FOLLOW YOUR DIRECTIONS AGAIN!

Right on. Stay mad!!! I'm mad also. Really fucking mad. Its gives us strength.


PB

[Bean]

Yep...sounds like you're doing everything right, Neon!!! You're in the stage I call NUTS. It is a technical term. Quit on!!!

[AppleJack]

Man, having a shitty day, actually several shitty days... Funny how the Nic Bitch rears her ugly head right when things feel toughest.
Day 13 Questioning, my sanity. But not my Quit.
We bought a car, 2000 Lexus RX 300 for 4800 about 4 months ago as a commuter vehicle, just to get me to and from work. Private Party 'bang head' they had it all detailed and buffed up, sparkling and spotless. That will be a warning sign in the future. I am not very mechanical, like on a 1-10 scale maybe a 5 in knowledge and a 3 in hands on... I usually make things worseÃ,… Anyway last Thursday morning, made 2 turns on the way to work and on the 3rd, POW! No more power steering. Took it to the mechanic on my lunch break, P.S. Pump is toast, and the Ã,“Steering GearÃ,” may be bad too, wonÃ,’t know till they get it open, (make that 5 in knowledge a 3, I have no clueÃ,…). Anyway, have a good friend who is a Volkswagen Mechanic, and he says he can do it for less, so he put a new pump in over the weekend. Long story short, apparently everything steering is pretty much toast, all the racks and gears and even the pinions! So we are looking at $1500-1800 even with my friend doing it. Plus he finds that although the timing belt is pretty new, it was installed incorrectly and is wearing badly or something, there is an oil leak somewhere on the engines, and we already knew it had some break issues, but they all need to be completely replaced too, so $400more. I just want to Ninja rig it to steer for long enough to trade it in on a Huffy or somethingÃ,…
To add to our financial woes, my dumbass couldnÃ,’t control my clicking finger and blew like over a grand on Cyber Monday, (not all on myselfÃ,…) so I have been calling to see what I can return, and of course everything has restocking fees, like 20-25%... I just hate money. Of course the wife is upset, we got a little carried away Christmas wise, and that just makes me more upset, and being on day 13 isnÃ,’t doing anything to improve my mood. We are very much live within our means people, we try to avoid debt at all cost, and we have been diligently saving for a down payment on new house. We have had our eye on one for a few months. ItÃ,’s a foreclosure, fixer upper, but we could make it a kickass home. We were looking at it for like the 5th time and we noticed the kitchen sink leaking underneath into the cupboard, which our Agent reported to the bankÃ,’s Agent so it was it was taken off the market for several weeks while they made some. They JUST relisted it, and during the repairs, they tore out all the carpet and are now offering a carpet allowance as well soÃ,… We literally have just enough to get it and fix things to make it livable, so this car crap couldnÃ,’t have come at a worse time.
Alright, venting over. Back to why we are here. So while IÃ,’m pondering all the above crap, of course the nic-bitch is whispering how much better IÃ,’ll feel if I caveÃ,…. I feel a little bit insane because, that shit is me, telling me to dip. And simultaneously I know itÃ,’s the STUPIDEST thing I could possibly doÃ,…
I dipped for about 4 years, used NRT for probably over a year, while still dipping. I did some mathematical estimations, $12,000-14,000. TWELVE to FOURTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. I know many of you have numbers even higher than that, but that is enough to fix the car and fix up the new house, with a savings left over for security. Oh and I could have paid for that cyber Monday laptop tooÃ,… Oh, that doesnÃ,’t even include the gum. I donÃ,’t careÃ,… IÃ,’m just screaming in my head right nowÃ,…
Ã,“SO YOU THINK YOU CAN COME INTO MY HEAD AND TELL ME IÃ,’LL FEEL BETTER IF I DIP? IÃ,’LL FEEL BETTER IF I DRIVE TO THE STORE, WASTE MORE OF THE MONEY I WORK MY ASS OFF FOR, AND PUT A DISCUSTING SMELLING, HORRIBLE TASTING, WAD OF POISON DRIPPING, TERRIBLE TASTING SHIT IN MY MOUTH??? I WILL FEEL BETTER ABOUT MY FINANCIAL DIFFICULTYS BY WASTING MORE OF MY MONEY, ON YOU?

OhÃ,…
Maybe youÃ,’re rightÃ,…
I know IÃ,’ll feel better when IÃ,’m spending every spare cent on testing supplies and medications for the diabetes you gave me.
And IÃ,’ll enjoy buying the medications, and paying for DrÃ,’s visits, surgeries, and chemo/radiation therapy for the cancer you gave me.
And all the money on heart and other cardiovascular issues because you cause every vein in my body to shrivel up and die!
And I will feel so much better when my last pennies are spent on my funeral, when I die, long before my time, remembering all the great times I had sneaking away to have a dip.
And how all the hours spent waiting at DoctorsÃ,’ offices, and laying in hospital beds and waiting in lines at pharmacies, were such a better use of my time than spending that time with my family.

OhÃ,… wait a second...

FUCK OFF AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY MIND BITCH. I WILL NEVER LISTEN TO YOUR VOICE OR FOLLOW YOUR DIRECTIONS AGAIN!
YOU LOSE.

Damn! I love me a good rant!!

Rock on brother. Life throws poo at you. That's just how it is. Dipping was a retarded way to cope with a problem that dip can't do anything to fix! Keep your head up man...

[Derk40]

Man, having a shitty day, actually several shitty days... Funny how the Nic Bitch rears her ugly head right when things feel toughest.
Day 13 Questioning, my sanity. But not my Quit.
We bought a car, 2000 Lexus RX 300 for 4800 about 4 months ago as a commuter vehicle, just to get me to and from work. Private Party 'bang head' they had it all detailed and buffed up, sparkling and spotless. That will be a warning sign in the future. I am not very mechanical, like on a 1-10 scale maybe a 5 in knowledge and a 3 in hands on... I usually make things worseÃ,… Anyway last Thursday morning, made 2 turns on the way to work and on the 3rd, POW! No more power steering. Took it to the mechanic on my lunch break, P.S. Pump is toast, and the Ã,“Steering GearÃ,” may be bad too, wonÃ,’t know till they get it open, (make that 5 in knowledge a 3, I have no clueÃ,…). Anyway, have a good friend who is a Volkswagen Mechanic, and he says he can do it for less, so he put a new pump in over the weekend. Long story short, apparently everything steering is pretty much toast, all the racks and gears and even the pinions! So we are looking at $1500-1800 even with my friend doing it. Plus he finds that although the timing belt is pretty new, it was installed incorrectly and is wearing badly or something, there is an oil leak somewhere on the engines, and we already knew it had some break issues, but they all need to be completely replaced too, so $400more. I just want to Ninja rig it to steer for long enough to trade it in on a Huffy or somethingÃ,…
To add to our financial woes, my dumbass couldnÃ,’t control my clicking finger and blew like over a grand on Cyber Monday, (not all on myselfÃ,…) so I have been calling to see what I can return, and of course everything has restocking fees, like 20-25%... I just hate money. Of course the wife is upset, we got a little carried away Christmas wise, and that just makes me more upset, and being on day 13 isnÃ,’t doing anything to improve my mood. We are very much live within our means people, we try to avoid debt at all cost, and we have been diligently saving for a down payment on new house. We have had our eye on one for a few months. ItÃ,’s a foreclosure, fixer upper, but we could make it a kickass home. We were looking at it for like the 5th time and we noticed the kitchen sink leaking underneath into the cupboard, which our Agent reported to the bankÃ,’s Agent so it was it was taken off the market for several weeks while they made some. They JUST relisted it, and during the repairs, they tore out all the carpet and are now offering a carpet allowance as well soÃ,… We literally have just enough to get it and fix things to make it livable, so this car crap couldnÃ,’t have come at a worse time.
Alright, venting over. Back to why we are here. So while IÃ,’m pondering all the above crap, of course the nic-bitch is whispering how much better IÃ,’ll feel if I caveÃ,…. I feel a little bit insane because, that shit is me, telling me to dip. And simultaneously I know itÃ,’s the STUPIDEST thing I could possibly doÃ,…
I dipped for about 4 years, used NRT for probably over a year, while still dipping. I did some mathematical estimations, $12,000-14,000. TWELVE to FOURTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. I know many of you have numbers even higher than that, but that is enough to fix the car and fix up the new house, with a savings left over for security. Oh and I could have paid for that cyber Monday laptop tooÃ,… Oh, that doesnÃ,’t even include the gum. I donÃ,’t careÃ,… IÃ,’m just screaming in my head right nowÃ,…
Ã,“SO YOU THINK YOU CAN COME INTO MY HEAD AND TELL ME IÃ,’LL FEEL BETTER IF I DIP? IÃ,’LL FEEL BETTER IF I DRIVE TO THE STORE, WASTE MORE OF THE MONEY I WORK MY ASS OFF FOR, AND PUT A DISCUSTING SMELLING, HORRIBLE TASTING, WAD OF POISON DRIPPING, TERRIBLE TASTING SHIT IN MY MOUTH??? I WILL FEEL BETTER ABOUT MY FINANCIAL DIFFICULTYS BY WASTING MORE OF MY MONEY, ON YOU?

OhÃ,…
Ã,  Ã,  Maybe youÃ,’re rightÃ,…
Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  I know IÃ,’ll feel better when IÃ,’m spending every spare cent on testing supplies and medications for the diabetes you gave me.
Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  And IÃ,’ll enjoy buying the medications, and paying for DrÃ,’s visits, surgeries, and chemo/radiation therapy for the cancer you gave me.
Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  And all the money on heart and other cardiovascular issues because you cause every vein in my body to shrivel up and die!
Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  And I will feel so much better when my last pennies are spent on my funeral, when I die, long before my time, remembering all the great times I had sneaking away to have a dip.
Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  Ã,  And how all the hours spent waiting at DoctorsÃ,’ offices, and laying in hospital beds and waiting in lines at pharmacies, were such a better use of my time than spending that time with my family.

OhÃ,… wait a second...

FUCK OFF AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY MIND BITCH. I WILL NEVER LISTEN TO YOUR VOICE OR FOLLOW YOUR DIRECTIONS AGAIN!
YOU LOSE.

Well done bro. The last thing you need is another problem! The finances will work their way thru. They are not permanent problems. Hang in there. Keep fighting for your quit today... you are winning that war today!

I join you in telling the nic b to F off! QLF!

[rdad]

Nice Panther! Good venting. Keep it up man. I'm lockstep right next to you buddy.

[NeonPanther]

Man, having a shitty day, actually several shitty days... Funny how the Nic Bitch rears her ugly head right when things feel toughest.
Day 13 Questioning, my sanity. But not my Quit.
We bought a car, 2000 Lexus RX 300 for 4800 about 4 months ago as a commuter vehicle, just to get me to and from work. Private Party 'bang head' they had it all detailed and buffed up, sparkling and spotless. That will be a warning sign in the future. I am not very mechanical, like on a 1-10 scale maybe a 5 in knowledge and a 3 in hands on... I usually make things worseÃ,… Anyway last Thursday morning, made 2 turns on the way to work and on the 3rd, POW! No more power steering. Took it to the mechanic on my lunch break, P.S. Pump is toast, and the Ã,“Steering GearÃ,” may be bad too, wonÃ,’t know till they get it open, (make that 5 in knowledge a 3, I have no clueÃ,…). Anyway, have a good friend who is a Volkswagen Mechanic, and he says he can do it for less, so he put a new pump in over the weekend. Long story short, apparently everything steering is pretty much toast, all the racks and gears and even the pinions! So we are looking at $1500-1800 even with my friend doing it. Plus he finds that although the timing belt is pretty new, it was installed incorrectly and is wearing badly or something, there is an oil leak somewhere on the engines, and we already knew it had some break issues, but they all need to be completely replaced too, so $400more. I just want to Ninja rig it to steer for long enough to trade it in on a Huffy or somethingÃ,…
To add to our financial woes, my dumbass couldnÃ,’t control my clicking finger and blew like over a grand on Cyber Monday, (not all on myselfÃ,…) so I have been calling to see what I can return, and of course everything has restocking fees, like 20-25%... I just hate money. Of course the wife is upset, we got a little carried away Christmas wise, and that just makes me more upset, and being on day 13 isnÃ,’t doing anything to improve my mood. We are very much live within our means people, we try to avoid debt at all cost, and we have been diligently saving for a down payment on new house. We have had our eye on one for a few months. ItÃ,’s a foreclosure, fixer upper, but we could make it a kickass home. We were looking at it for like the 5th time and we noticed the kitchen sink leaking underneath into the cupboard, which our Agent reported to the bankÃ,’s Agent so it was it was taken off the market for several weeks while they made some. They JUST relisted it, and during the repairs, they tore out all the carpet and are now offering a carpet allowance as well soÃ,… We literally have just enough to get it and fix things to make it livable, so this car crap couldnÃ,’t have come at a worse time.
Alright, venting over. Back to why we are here. So while IÃ,’m pondering all the above crap, of course the nic-bitch is whispering how much better IÃ,’ll feel if I caveÃ,…. I feel a little bit insane because, that shit is me, telling me to dip. And simultaneously I know itÃ,’s the STUPIDEST thing I could possibly doÃ,…
I dipped for about 4 years, used NRT for probably over a year, while still dipping. I did some mathematical estimations, $12,000-14,000. TWELVE to FOURTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. I know many of you have numbers even higher than that, but that is enough to fix the car and fix up the new house, with a savings left over for security. Oh and I could have paid for that cyber Monday laptop tooÃ,… Oh, that doesnÃ,’t even include the gum. I donÃ,’t careÃ,… IÃ,’m just screaming in my head right nowÃ,…
Ã,“SO YOU THINK YOU CAN COME INTO MY HEAD AND TELL ME IÃ,’LL FEEL BETTER IF I DIP? IÃ,’LL FEEL BETTER IF I DRIVE TO THE STORE, WASTE MORE OF THE MONEY I WORK MY ASS OFF FOR, AND PUT A DISCUSTING SMELLING, HORRIBLE TASTING, WAD OF POISON DRIPPING, TERRIBLE TASTING SHIT IN MY MOUTH??? I WILL FEEL BETTER ABOUT MY FINANCIAL DIFFICULTYS BY WASTING MORE OF MY MONEY, ON YOU?

OhÃ,…
Maybe youÃ,’re rightÃ,…
I know IÃ,’ll feel better when IÃ,’m spending every spare cent on testing supplies and medications for the diabetes you gave me.
And IÃ,’ll enjoy buying the medications, and paying for DrÃ,’s visits, surgeries, and chemo/radiation therapy for the cancer you gave me.
And all the money on heart and other cardiovascular issues because you cause every vein in my body to shrivel up and die!
And I will feel so much better when my last pennies are spent on my funeral, when I die, long before my time, remembering all the great times I had sneaking away to have a dip.
And how all the hours spent waiting at DoctorsÃ,’ offices, and laying in hospital beds and waiting in lines at pharmacies, were such a better use of my time than spending that time with my family.

OhÃ,… wait a second...

FUCK OFF AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY MIND BITCH. I WILL NEVER LISTEN TO YOUR VOICE OR FOLLOW YOUR DIRECTIONS AGAIN!
YOU LOSE.

[Mthomas3824]

Day 10.

Who the hell am I?!?
I don't know who the hell I am anymore!
Definitely not the same guy I was 11 days ago...

And it is Amazing!!! So was getting 9 hours of solid sleep last night.

Really going to try to make a decent post about what is going on at this point of my quit, but I have this weird thing going on with my body and mind right now, like a motivation to get some shit done. Like actual energy, and a honey do list like 2 years long the poison always told me could wait. So I'm off to Lowes!

I do need to say this, Applejack, thank you so much for taking my call on Thursday. It was the difference between staying quit and caving. I have every KTC member who I have swapped #'s with in their own special Badass Group on my phone, Applejack was an alphabetical 1st so that's who I called, but it is amazing to know I have over a dozen more #'s for people that would have done the EXACT same thing. I know if I need to make a call, and I choose not to, it's exactly the same as CHOOSING to cave. I choose to keep my promise today, and everyday. In a really sober, manly, mostly heterosexual, badass quitter kind of way, I love you guys!

To say I'm happy to help isn't quite enough.

It's satisfying. Deeply. Love to see your wins bro!

Applejack!!! Thanks again man :P

As for the Rainbow, my little sister designed that Neon Beast to commemorate my Quit. I picked the name NeonPanther out of nowhere. Just wanted to register so I could ask a question, get an answer and most likely never return... like a deceitful, dishonest addict. Which is exactly what I was 13 days ago. Now, I wear my rainbow spangled NeonPanther as a Badge of Honor! :D

On a side note, as a Christian, and believer of the Bible, the Rainbow is a representation of Gods promise to Noah after the flood. So I guess my flowing rainbow mane and tail are a representation of my daily promise to Quit! 'oh yeah'

Awesome, a new quitter made a support call.

This is a strong and serious quitter. Watch this one's journey, its going to be inspiring.

[srans]

But I'm following my plan, and I've never felt as good about successfully quitting as I have for the last several weeks.

I pulled this ^^^ from from your first words at ktc. I read your intro again just for kicks. Your first words will always be a good read. How do you feel now about the plan you had before you came to ktc? (Rhetorical question).

Now you have a plan my friend. I really like this new plan. Damn glad to be quit with you.

[NeonPanther]

Day 10.

Who the hell am I?!?
I don't know who the hell I am anymore!
Definitely not the same guy I was 11 days ago...

And it is Amazing!!! So was getting 9 hours of solid sleep last night.

Really going to try to make a decent post about what is going on at this point of my quit, but I have this weird thing going on with my body and mind right now, like a motivation to get some shit done. Like actual energy, and a honey do list like 2 years long the poison always told me could wait. So I'm off to Lowes!

I do need to say this, Applejack, thank you so much for taking my call on Thursday. It was the difference between staying quit and caving. I have every KTC member who I have swapped #'s with in their own special Badass Group on my phone, Applejack was an alphabetical 1st so that's who I called, but it is amazing to know I have over a dozen more #'s for people that would have done the EXACT same thing. I know if I need to make a call, and I choose not to, it's exactly the same as CHOOSING to cave. I choose to keep my promise today, and everyday. In a really sober, manly, mostly heterosexual, badass quitter kind of way, I love you guys!

To say I'm happy to help isn't quite enough.

It's satisfying. Deeply. Love to see your wins bro!

Applejack!!! Thanks again man :P

As for the Rainbow, my little sister designed that Neon Beast to commemorate my Quit. I picked the name NeonPanther out of nowhere. Just wanted to register so I could ask a question, get an answer and most likely never return... like a deceitful, dishonest addict. Which is exactly what I was 13 days ago. Now, I wear my rainbow spangled NeonPanther as a Badge of Honor! :D

On a side note, as a Christian, and believer of the Bible, the Rainbow is a representation of Gods promise to Noah after the flood. So I guess my flowing rainbow mane and tail are a representation of my daily promise to Quit! 'oh yeah'

[Erussell]

iiiiiiBravo!!!!!!

[ParadigmDawg]

Day 10.

Who the hell am I?!?
I don't know who the hell I am anymore!
Definitely not the same guy I was 11 days ago...

And it is Amazing!!! So was getting 9 hours of solid sleep last night.

Really going to try to make a decent post about what is going on at this point of my quit, but I have this weird thing going on with my body and mind right now, like a motivation to get some shit done. Like actual energy, and a honey do list like 2 years long the poison always told me could wait. So I'm off to Lowes!

I do need to say this, Applejack, thank you so much for taking my call on Thursday. It was the difference between staying quit and caving. I have every KTC member who I have swapped #'s with in their own special Badass Group on my phone, Applejack was an alphabetical 1st so that's who I called, but it is amazing to know I have over a dozen more #'s for people that would have done the EXACT same thing. I know if I need to make a call, and I choose not to, it's exactly the same as CHOOSING to cave. I choose to keep my promise today, and everyday. In a really sober, manly, mostly heterosexual, badass quitter kind of way, I love you guys!

The Rainbow tailed Avatar has me questioning the "Heterosexual kind of love"...lol...

Strong quit you have going on there brother. I am proud of you.

[AppleJack]

Day 10.

Who the hell am I?!?
I don't know who the hell I am anymore!
Definitely not the same guy I was 11 days ago...

And it is Amazing!!! So was getting 9 hours of solid sleep last night.

Really going to try to make a decent post about what is going on at this point of my quit, but I have this weird thing going on with my body and mind right now, like a motivation to get some shit done. Like actual energy, and a honey do list like 2 years long the poison always told me could wait. So I'm off to Lowes!

I do need to say this, Applejack, thank you so much for taking my call on Thursday. It was the difference between staying quit and caving. I have every KTC member who I have swapped #'s with in their own special Badass Group on my phone, Applejack was an alphabetical 1st so that's who I called, but it is amazing to know I have over a dozen more #'s for people that would have done the EXACT same thing. I know if I need to make a call, and I choose not to, it's exactly the same as CHOOSING to cave. I choose to keep my promise today, and everyday. In a really sober, manly, mostly heterosexual, badass quitter kind of way, I love you guys!

To say I'm happy to help isn't quite enough.

It's satisfying. Deeply. Love to see your wins bro!

[B-loMatt]

I smell a quitter! Too much good stuff going on here for me to quote any one thing. NP you are living it. Hit me up if you want anything.

[RAZD611]

Day 10.

Who the hell am I?!?
I don't know who the hell I am anymore!
Definitely not the same guy I was 11 days ago...

And it is Amazing!!! So was getting 9 hours of solid sleep last night.

Really going to try to make a decent post about what is going on at this point of my quit, but I have this weird thing going on with my body and mind right now, like a motivation to get some shit done. Like actual energy, and a honey do list like 2 years long the poison always told me could wait. So I'm off to Lowes!

I do need to say this, Applejack, thank you so much for taking my call on Thursday. It was the difference between staying quit and caving. I have every KTC member who I have swapped #'s with in their own special Badass Group on my phone, Applejack was an alphabetical 1st so that's who I called, but it is amazing to know I have over a dozen more #'s for people that would have done the EXACT same thing. I know if I need to make a call, and I choose not to, it's exactly the same as CHOOSING to cave. I choose to keep my promise today, and everyday. In a really sober, manly, mostly heterosexual, badass quitter kind of way, I love you guys!

:wub:

And that is how it works folks. It's really that simple.

You either CHOOSE to stay quit or you CHOOSE to fail. either way it's your CHOICE.

This place just gives you what you need to CHOOSE to stay quit.

[NeonPanther]

Day 10.

Who the hell am I?!?
I don't know who the hell I am anymore!
Definitely not the same guy I was 11 days ago...

And it is Amazing!!! So was getting 9 hours of solid sleep last night.

Really going to try to make a decent post about what is going on at this point of my quit, but I have this weird thing going on with my body and mind right now, like a motivation to get some shit done. Like actual energy, and a honey do list like 2 years long the poison always told me could wait. So I'm off to Lowes!

I do need to say this, Applejack, thank you so much for taking my call on Thursday. It was the difference between staying quit and caving. I have every KTC member who I have swapped #'s with in their own special Badass Group on my phone, Applejack was an alphabetical 1st so that's who I called, but it is amazing to know I have over a dozen more #'s for people that would have done the EXACT same thing. I know if I need to make a call, and I choose not to, it's exactly the same as CHOOSING to cave. I choose to keep my promise today, and everyday. In a really sober, manly, mostly heterosexual, badass quitter kind of way, I love you guys!