Anger brought me back to Day 1

[quitter123]

STORY TIME!!!

Today i cleaned my car really well. Looked under the seat and what do i find staring back at me? ONLY ONE, CRISP, looked FRESH OUT OF THE PACK cigarette. Obviously just like every addict on planet earth i was trying to give myself a reason to smoke just one. I stared at that cigarette the entire 2 hour drive home from Monterey CA, when i pulled into my driveway, the first thing i did was grab that cigarette take it to the trash, and CRUMBLE IT INTO A MILLION TINY PIECES. Never, i repeat NEVER have just one, it doesnt fuckin work like that, once an addict always an addict. If youre not quite there yet and youre reading this, learn to HATE EVERYTHING that contains even a drop of nicotine and QUIT LIKE A MOFO

Stay Quit Friends!
Stay strong with me!

Nicotine sucks.

Quitting doesn't.

Good job destroing the cig (should you hit this bump again, do it faster), and Stay quit

I'm worried about two things: you stared at a cigarette for two straight hours, and you did it while driving?

It was just poetic to me. Multiple times ive run into a survivor of the purge. Idk i just wasnt that intimidated by it, i wanted it there so i could scold it and talk shit to it, like everytime i go into the store and see a can, that conversation you have. I like that conversation.

Nice!! Give it Hell.

[Daviddim]

STORY TIME!!!

Today i cleaned my car really well. Looked under the seat and what do i find staring back at me? ONLY ONE, CRISP, looked FRESH OUT OF THE PACK cigarette. Obviously just like every addict on planet earth i was trying to give myself a reason to smoke just one. I stared at that cigarette the entire 2 hour drive home from Monterey CA, when i pulled into my driveway, the first thing i did was grab that cigarette take it to the trash, and CRUMBLE IT INTO A MILLION TINY PIECES. Never, i repeat NEVER have just one, it doesnt fuckin work like that, once an addict always an addict. If youre not quite there yet and youre reading this, learn to HATE EVERYTHING that contains even a drop of nicotine and QUIT LIKE A MOFO

Stay Quit Friends!
Stay strong with me!

Nicotine sucks.

Quitting doesn't.

Good job destroing the cig (should you hit this bump again, do it faster), and Stay quit

I'm worried about two things: you stared at a cigarette for two straight hours, and you did it while driving?

It was just poetic to me. Multiple times ive run into a survivor of the purge. Idk i just wasnt that intimidated by it, i wanted it there so i could scold it and talk shit to it, like everytime i go into the store and see a can, that conversation you have. I like that conversation.

[AppleJack]

STORY TIME!!!

Today i cleaned my car really well. Looked under the seat and what do i find staring back at me? ONLY ONE, CRISP, looked FRESH OUT OF THE PACK cigarette. Obviously just like every addict on planet earth i was trying to give myself a reason to smoke just one. I stared at that cigarette the entire 2 hour drive home from Monterey CA, when i pulled into my driveway, the first thing i did was grab that cigarette take it to the trash, and CRUMBLE IT INTO A MILLION TINY PIECES. Never, i repeat NEVER have just one, it doesnt fuckin work like that, once an addict always an addict. If youre not quite there yet and youre reading this, learn to HATE EVERYTHING that contains even a drop of nicotine and QUIT LIKE A MOFO

Stay Quit Friends!
Stay strong with me!

Nicotine sucks.

Quitting doesn't.

Good job destroing the cig (should you hit this bump again, do it faster), and Stay quit

I'm worried about two things: you stared at a cigarette for two straight hours, and you did it while driving?

I'm with Grizz... Why didn't you just crush it, piss on it right then and there, and be done with it?

Your story is bs. Why keep it around? You're saying the right thing but I don't feel a real distance from you and your addiction.

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

STORY TIME!!!

Today i cleaned my car really well. Looked under the seat and what do i find staring back at me? ONLY ONE, CRISP, looked FRESH OUT OF THE PACK cigarette. Obviously just like every addict on planet earth i was trying to give myself a reason to smoke just one. I stared at that cigarette the entire 2 hour drive home from Monterey CA, when i pulled into my driveway, the first thing i did was grab that cigarette take it to the trash, and CRUMBLE IT INTO A MILLION TINY PIECES. Never, i repeat NEVER have just one, it doesnt fuckin work like that, once an addict always an addict. If youre not quite there yet and youre reading this, learn to HATE EVERYTHING that contains even a drop of nicotine and QUIT LIKE A MOFO

Stay Quit Friends!
Stay strong with me!

Nicotine sucks.

Quitting doesn't.

Good job destroing the cig (should you hit this bump again, do it faster), and Stay quit

I'm worried about two things: you stared at a cigarette for two straight hours, and you did it while driving?

[Bombero]

STORY TIME!!!

Today i cleaned my car really well. Looked under the seat and what do i find staring back at me? ONLY ONE, CRISP, looked FRESH OUT OF THE PACK cigarette. Obviously just like every addict on planet earth i was trying to give myself a reason to smoke just one. I stared at that cigarette the entire 2 hour drive home from Monterey CA, when i pulled into my driveway, the first thing i did was grab that cigarette take it to the trash, and CRUMBLE IT INTO A MILLION TINY PIECES. Never, i repeat NEVER have just one, it doesnt fuckin work like that, once an addict always an addict. If youre not quite there yet and youre reading this, learn to HATE EVERYTHING that contains even a drop of nicotine and QUIT LIKE A MOFO

Stay Quit Friends!
Stay strong with me!

Nicotine sucks.

Quitting doesn't.

Good job destroing the cig (should you hit this bump again, do it faster), and Stay quit

[Daviddim]

STORY TIME!!!

Today i cleaned my car really well. Looked under the seat and what do i find staring back at me? ONLY ONE, CRISP, looked FRESH OUT OF THE PACK cigarette. Obviously just like every addict on planet earth i was trying to give myself a reason to smoke just one. I stared at that cigarette the entire 2 hour drive home from Monterey CA, when i pulled into my driveway, the first thing i did was grab that cigarette take it to the trash, and CRUMBLE IT INTO A MILLION TINY PIECES. Never, i repeat NEVER have just one, it doesnt fuckin work like that, once an addict always an addict. If youre not quite there yet and youre reading this, learn to HATE EVERYTHING that contains even a drop of nicotine and QUIT LIKE A MOFO

Stay Quit Friends!
Stay strong with me!

[Daviddim]

You are begining to get it David... Congrats.. As I read thru your into post, In the beginning I read alot of blaming others for your actions, your addition... I was starting to get prepped to write you a slashing, swift kick in the balls post here... To tell you to grow up, and control yourself... But... Then I read on.... I think you are getting it.

We are all addicts... We always will be addicts, but if we lived with excuses like "nicotine made me this and that" none of us would ever be able to quit...

I think you will be ok David... I quit with you bro!

Thanks shorthorn!

Its great to hear those words considering the bashing ive received over the last 2 weeks.

I QLF with you!

[Shorthorn]

You are begining to get it David... Congrats.. As I read thru your into post, In the beginning I read alot of blaming others for your actions, your addition... I was starting to get prepped to write you a slashing, swift kick in the balls post here... To tell you to grow up, and control yourself... But... Then I read on.... I think you are getting it.

We are all addicts... We always will be addicts, but if we lived with excuses like "nicotine made me this and that" none of us would ever be able to quit...

I think you will be ok David... I quit with you bro!

[brettlees]

So once again, last night I was out with some friends. LITERALLY every one of them smoked or dipped, it was tough, of course I wanted one. No way i was actually going to put one of those turds in my mouth again though. Ive come to far having reached my 2 week mark today, and ive worked to hard through that first week sober to go back now or ever. Watched someone spend 7.50 on a pack of smokes at the bar last night and rolled my eyes. Yah good job, you just spent an hours pay on chemicals to rot your insides with. With that said, im proud of myself I finally have the nic bitch behind bars, she might break free one day, but this time il be prepared for her with a pair of handcuffs and a stun baton and im puttin her slutty ass back in jail!

Slay some craves!
ODAAT

Nice work! thanks for posting too! Keep it up, stay strong and alert to nicbitch's tricks, she'll keep throwing you curves.

[Daviddim]

So once again, last night I was out with some friends. LITERALLY every one of them smoked or dipped, it was tough, of course I wanted one. No way i was actually going to put one of those turds in my mouth again though. Ive come to far having reached my 2 week mark today, and ive worked to hard through that first week sober to go back now or ever. Watched someone spend 7.50 on a pack of smokes at the bar last night and rolled my eyes. Yah good job, you just spent an hours pay on chemicals to rot your insides with. With that said, im proud of myself I finally have the nic bitch behind bars, she might break free one day, but this time il be prepared for her with a pair of handcuffs and a stun baton and im puttin her slutty ass back in jail!

Slay some craves!
ODAAT

[Bombero]

I have just caught up on this thread. This may have caused me to miss the most important explanation if it is indeed true. I am also not going to go back 2 weeks to check roll and I will assume that the bad ass quitters are right when they say you caved on day four and then came back and posted day five but erased it? You need to answer this question. Did you do this? If so, then why? Please answer the question please.

Yes, i did post the next day. The first week through this quit idk why i did alot of things i did. I dont know why I considered lying, i never thought of myself as the kind of person that would do something like that. Nicotine has been causing me to lie to people including myself about my addiction for years, and the fact that i tried to blame my cave on something other than my own damn self?! Everytime i think about it im fucking ashamed. It comes down to the fact that i was not prepared mentally, and when i did cave my brain tried to justify lying and thinking "it was just one cigarette." As an addict i realized (however not quickly enough) How STUPID of a rationalization that was and im sorry, truly. I realize i have alot of work to do to gain back my months confidence, but im STILL HERE, and I still WANT TO LIVE.

Day 11
Daviddim

I'm one of the new guys. Been down that road, and it breeds an ease of slipping that is HARD to overcome. Watch yourself, punish yourself severely for even THINKING about caving, do whatever you have to do to get through the crave. I've used in every form, primarily dip, but I've found regular old gum helps the urge (but not the crave), and makes it slightly easier to make it through. I'll be honest with you - this shit sucks, and for me it is a painful game I win by stacking slight advantages in my favor. I guess it's kinda a game of inches.

Hard talk - you lied to your group. Yeah, I empathize with you, but that is some bullshit. You know how I get through the day? I read the roll. THere's 2 of us on there right now - I know that 2TQ is right there with me. I refuse to quit because I know that 2TQ hasn't caved, and all the others made it past this stage. You're at day 11, according to your post - you better keep adding +1's to that, cuz I'm counting on you.

There's support here, hit up your group or PM me. QFL dude

[Doc Chewfree]

I have just caught up on this thread. This may have caused me to miss the most important explanation if it is indeed true. I am also not going to go back 2 weeks to check roll and I will assume that the bad ass quitters are right when they say you caved on day four and then came back and posted day five but erased it? You need to answer this question. Did you do this? If so, then why? Please answer the question please.

Yes, i did post the next day. The first week through this quit idk why i did alot of things i did. I dont know why I considered lying, i never thought of myself as the kind of person that would do something like that. Nicotine has been causing me to lie to people including myself about my addiction for years, and the fact that i tried to blame my cave on something other than my own damn self?! Everytime i think about it im fucking ashamed. It comes down to the fact that i was not prepared mentally, and when i did cave my brain tried to justify lying and thinking "it was just one cigarette." As an addict i realized (however not quickly enough) How STUPID of a rationalization that was and im sorry, truly. I realize i have alot of work to do to gain back my months confidence, but im STILL HERE, and I still WANT TO LIVE.

Day 11
Daviddim

You're beginning to sound like a real bad ass quitter.
I quit with you, Daviddim!

[Daviddim]

I have just caught up on this thread. This may have caused me to miss the most important explanation if it is indeed true. I am also not going to go back 2 weeks to check roll and I will assume that the bad ass quitters are right when they say you caved on day four and then came back and posted day five but erased it? You need to answer this question. Did you do this? If so, then why? Please answer the question please.

Yes, i did post the next day. The first week through this quit idk why i did alot of things i did. I dont know why I considered lying, i never thought of myself as the kind of person that would do something like that. Nicotine has been causing me to lie to people including myself about my addiction for years, and the fact that i tried to blame my cave on something other than my own damn self?! Everytime i think about it im fucking ashamed. It comes down to the fact that i was not prepared mentally, and when i did cave my brain tried to justify lying and thinking "it was just one cigarette." As an addict i realized (however not quickly enough) How STUPID of a rationalization that was and im sorry, truly. I realize i have alot of work to do to gain back my months confidence, but im STILL HERE, and I still WANT TO LIVE.

Day 11
Daviddim

[rdad]

This weekend, i decided to stick around for the after party instead of driving 3.5 hours home after my show. I prepared myself all week for what i knew was going to be a big trigger. That night during the party, there was a girl that ran out of smokes, i watched as she made the transformation from satisfied nic addict to Raging Nicotine Hulk and then over the course of an hour, desperation sunk in and she frantically began looking for any source of nicotine she could find. I watched her and thought to myself immediately "Im so glad im not controlled by that bullshit anymore"

Im glad i stayed, that whole lesson did wonders for my confidence which was something i was missing this whole time. However, no matter how confident i am in my quit, i made a promise to myself not to let my guard down. I also owe my texting buddies gratitude for being there when i need them, and i plan on paying it forward someday.

Day 11
Daviddim

Right on. You are now seeing the world through the eyes of a quitter. Looks different doesn't it? Good job.

[Daviddim]

This weekend, i decided to stick around for the after party instead of driving 3.5 hours home after my show. I prepared myself all week for what i knew was going to be a big trigger. That night during the party, there was a girl that ran out of smokes, i watched as she made the transformation from satisfied nic addict to Raging Nicotine Hulk and then over the course of an hour, desperation sunk in and she frantically began looking for any source of nicotine she could find. I watched her and thought to myself immediately "Im so glad im not controlled by that bullshit anymore"

Im glad i stayed, that whole lesson did wonders for my confidence which was something i was missing this whole time. However, no matter how confident i am in my quit, i made a promise to myself not to let my guard down. I also owe my texting buddies gratitude for being there when i need them, and i plan on paying it forward someday.

Day 11
Daviddim