Diesel's Intro Page

[jaynellie]

Hey ass gaskets...

STOP CAVING!!!!

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?????!!!!!!

Like dominos I see another weakling fall every day it seems, and not some newb who fucks up after a day or two. People who supposedly know better, people who have talked the talk and have now fallen flat on their bitch ass faces as they can't walk the walk.

I'd give a rah rah speech or a "what to do if you think you are gonna cave" sermon, but that shit is all over this fucking site. Open up your fucking eyes and use it.

You're setting shitty examples for the new guys as well.

Pull your shit together or get the fuck out!!!

Fuck Me....

BRAVO!!!!!!

Said like a True Bad Ass that Honestly Cares

Preach On Brother!!!! 'chew2'

[Diesel2112]

Hey ass gaskets...

STOP CAVING!!!!

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?????!!!!!!

Like dominos I see another weakling fall every day it seems, and not some newb who fucks up after a day or two. People who supposedly know better, people who have talked the talk and have now fallen flat on their bitch ass faces as they can't walk the walk.

I'd give a rah rah speech or a "what to do if you think you are gonna cave" sermon, but that shit is all over this fucking site. Open up your fucking eyes and use it.

You're setting shitty examples for the new guys as well.

Pull your shit together or get the fuck out!!!

Fuck Me....

[Its_Got2Happen]

A tradition made better.

Another lions game down.� Another feast at my Aunts where my kids stay behind to spend the night with their cousins, and once again my crazy ass wife has just left for some midnight madness sales.

This leaves me satisfied, full, and alone.

In my ninja days this tradition ended with me stuffing rediculous amounts of Kodiak in my pie hole.� For years I THOUGHT that capper made an already great day better.

It did not.

No pererson of worth needs to end an already special day by poisoning themselves.� In no way does it make that day better, in fact it makes it worse.� Took me a long time and a lot of struggle to realize this, but I'm glad I have.

This marks year two of my new tradition of simply enjoying thanksgiving, free from the chains of addiction.�

For this, I am truly thankful.

I understand the pain and yet the feeling of victory. Sorry you got left behind with by the deal hunters. We are here for you. Yes, this would have been a prime dipping time for me as well. it is so hard to get through, but we will and will feel better tomorrow for doing so. That strength will help get us through tomorrow and the days after. For me, these holidays are the hardest days of all. Together we are stronger. One more day and we'll do it again.

George Hayduke

D, I'm not sure I'll ever be free from this addiction which is a 'nutkick'. Today, brother, we choose a life free from poison and just between us there's already about six grand that can go towards black friday for our families. :blink: Man, that's well worth it, we're well worth it and so are they. In fact, I'd agree with Mr. Hayduke here and affirm we meet back here tomorrow and do it again. :)

Every fucking day. On day at a time. Ill be here. It just keeps greying sweeter, especially when you don't do it alone. Feels good to be in the presence of bad ass quitters.

Quit on...

hey Brother Deisel, I quit with you and cope today.
It's our personal thoughts, takes and perspectives of our addictions that I cherish.
Cope believes: Never cured
You believe: Fuck you nic bitch every damn day.
I believe in both of yalls quits and beliefs!
Your quit is my quit, my quit is yours.
We keep doing the things that keep us quit and we keep quit from the thing we are addicted to.
Love you both. Glad you are here every damn day.

Amen to all of that. I am on this quit team. This is a band of winners right here.

[30isEnuff]

A tradition made better.

Another lions game down.  Another feast at my Aunts where my kids stay behind to spend the night with their cousins, and once again my crazy ass wife has just left for some midnight madness sales.

This leaves me satisfied, full, and alone.

In my ninja days this tradition ended with me stuffing rediculous amounts of Kodiak in my pie hole.  For years I THOUGHT that capper made an already great day better.

It did not.

No pererson of worth needs to end an already special day by poisoning themselves.  In no way does it make that day better, in fact it makes it worse.  Took me a long time and a lot of struggle to realize this, but I'm glad I have.

This marks year two of my new tradition of simply enjoying thanksgiving, free from the chains of addiction. 

For this, I am truly thankful.

I understand the pain and yet the feeling of victory. Sorry you got left behind with by the deal hunters. We are here for you. Yes, this would have been a prime dipping time for me as well. it is so hard to get through, but we will and will feel better tomorrow for doing so. That strength will help get us through tomorrow and the days after. For me, these holidays are the hardest days of all. Together we are stronger. One more day and we'll do it again.

George Hayduke

D, I'm not sure I'll ever be free from this addiction which is a 'nutkick'. Today, brother, we choose a life free from poison and just between us there's already about six grand that can go towards black friday for our families. :blink: Man, that's well worth it, we're well worth it and so are they. In fact, I'd agree with Mr. Hayduke here and affirm we meet back here tomorrow and do it again. :)

Every fucking day. On day at a time. Ill be here. It just keeps greying sweeter, especially when you don't do it alone. Feels good to be in the presence of bad ass quitters.

Quit on...

hey Brother Deisel, I quit with you and cope today.
It's our personal thoughts, takes and perspectives of our addictions that I cherish.
Cope believes: Never cured
You believe: Fuck you nic bitch every damn day.
I believe in both of yalls quits and beliefs!
Your quit is my quit, my quit is yours.
We keep doing the things that keep us quit and we keep quit from the thing we are addicted to.
Love you both. Glad you are here every damn day.

[Diesel2112]

A tradition made better.

Another lions game down.  Another feast at my Aunts where my kids stay behind to spend the night with their cousins, and once again my crazy ass wife has just left for some midnight madness sales.

This leaves me satisfied, full, and alone.

In my ninja days this tradition ended with me stuffing rediculous amounts of Kodiak in my pie hole.  For years I THOUGHT that capper made an already great day better.

It did not.

No pererson of worth needs to end an already special day by poisoning themselves.  In no way does it make that day better, in fact it makes it worse.  Took me a long time and a lot of struggle to realize this, but I'm glad I have.

This marks year two of my new tradition of simply enjoying thanksgiving, free from the chains of addiction. 

For this, I am truly thankful.

I understand the pain and yet the feeling of victory. Sorry you got left behind with by the deal hunters. We are here for you. Yes, this would have been a prime dipping time for me as well. it is so hard to get through, but we will and will feel better tomorrow for doing so. That strength will help get us through tomorrow and the days after. For me, these holidays are the hardest days of all. Together we are stronger. One more day and we'll do it again.

George Hayduke

D, I'm not sure I'll ever be free from this addiction which is a 'nutkick'. Today, brother, we choose a life free from poison and just between us there's already about six grand that can go towards black friday for our families. :blink: Man, that's well worth it, we're well worth it and so are they. In fact, I'd agree with Mr. Hayduke here and affirm we meet back here tomorrow and do it again. :)

Every fucking day. On day at a time. Ill be here. It just keeps greying sweeter, especially when you don't do it alone. Feels good to be in the presence of bad ass quitters.

Quit on...

[copingwithoutcopen]

A tradition made better.

Another lions game down.  Another feast at my Aunts where my kids stay behind to spend the night with their cousins, and once again my crazy ass wife has just left for some midnight madness sales.

This leaves me satisfied, full, and alone.

In my ninja days this tradition ended with me stuffing rediculous amounts of Kodiak in my pie hole.  For years I THOUGHT that capper made an already great day better.

It did not.

No pererson of worth needs to end an already special day by poisoning themselves.  In no way does it make that day better, in fact it makes it worse.  Took me a long time and a lot of struggle to realize this, but I'm glad I have.

This marks year two of my new tradition of simply enjoying thanksgiving, free from the chains of addiction. 

For this, I am truly thankful.

I understand the pain and yet the feeling of victory. Sorry you got left behind with by the deal hunters. We are here for you. Yes, this would have been a prime dipping time for me as well. it is so hard to get through, but we will and will feel better tomorrow for doing so. That strength will help get us through tomorrow and the days after. For me, these holidays are the hardest days of all. Together we are stronger. One more day and we'll do it again.

George Hayduke

D, I'm not sure I'll ever be free from this addiction which is a 'nutkick'. Today, brother, we choose a life free from poison and just between us there's already about six grand that can go towards black friday for our families. :blink: Man, that's well worth it, we're well worth it and so are they. In fact, I'd agree with Mr. Hayduke here and affirm we meet back here tomorrow and do it again. :)

[georgehayduke]

A tradition made better.

Another lions game down. Another feast at my Aunts where my kids stay behind to spend the night with their cousins, and once again my crazy ass wife has just left for some midnight madness sales.

This leaves me satisfied, full, and alone.

In my ninja days this tradition ended with me stuffing rediculous amounts of Kodiak in my pie hole. For years I THOUGHT that capper made an already great day better.

It did not.

No pererson of worth needs to end an already special day by poisoning themselves. In no way does it make that day better, in fact it makes it worse. Took me a long time and a lot of struggle to realize this, but I'm glad I have.

This marks year two of my new tradition of simply enjoying thanksgiving, free from the chains of addiction.

For this, I am truly thankful.

I understand the pain and yet the feeling of victory. Sorry you got left behind with by the deal hunters. We are here for you. Yes, this would have been a prime dipping time for me as well. it is so hard to get through, but we will and will feel better tomorrow for doing so. That strength will help get us through tomorrow and the days after. For me, these holidays are the hardest days of all. Together we are stronger. One more day and we'll do it again.

George Hayduke

[jaynellie]

A tradition made better.

Another lions game down.  Another feast at my Aunts where my kids stay behind to spend the night with their cousins, and once again my crazy ass wife has just left for some midnight madness sales.

This leaves me satisfied, full, and alone.

In my ninja days this tradition ended with me stuffing rediculous amounts of Kodiak in my pie hole.  For years I THOUGHT that capper made an already great day better.

It did not.

No pererson of worth needs to end an already special day by poisoning themselves.  In no way does it make that day better, in fact it makes it worse.  Took me a long time and a lot of struggle to realize this, but I'm glad I have.

This marks year two of my new tradition of simply enjoying thanksgiving, free from the chains of addiction. 

For this, I am truly thankful.

Thank You Sir!!!! .......Nuff said 'clap'

[Diesel2112]

A tradition made better.

Another lions game down. Another feast at my Aunts where my kids stay behind to spend the night with their cousins, and once again my crazy ass wife has just left for some midnight madness sales.

This leaves me satisfied, full, and alone.

In my ninja days this tradition ended with me stuffing rediculous amounts of Kodiak in my pie hole. For years I THOUGHT that capper made an already great day better.

It did not.

No pererson of worth needs to end an already special day by poisoning themselves. In no way does it make that day better, in fact it makes it worse. Took me a long time and a lot of struggle to realize this, but I'm glad I have.

This marks year two of my new tradition of simply enjoying thanksgiving, free from the chains of addiction.

For this, I am truly thankful.

[Diesel2112]

Hey all, its the fake tough guy keyboard cowboy here.

Just wanted to say I'm 513-0 vs the nic bitch and I ain't changing for ANYONE.

You think I'm fake.. fuck you
You think its ok to make fun of some if the shit I went through...fuck you
You think I'm here for any reason other than to quit and help others do the same...fuck you
You think Im just a coward behind a keyboard...fuck you

I'm real and I'm ME.  You don't like it...

Fuck You.

Have a blessed day

Quit on...

Let. It. Go.

Thank you for being helpful on this path. Quit together, not apart.

Its gone. Just had to vent.

Quit on biatches...

[gorilla1]

Hey all, its the fake tough guy keyboard cowboy here.

Just wanted to say I'm 513-0 vs the nic bitch and I ain't changing for ANYONE.

You think I'm fake.. fuck you
You think its ok to make fun of some if the shit I went through...fuck you
You think I'm here for any reason other than to quit and help others do the same...fuck you
You think Im just a coward behind a keyboard...fuck you

I'm real and I'm ME. You don't like it...

Fuck You.

Have a blessed day

Quit on...

Let. It. Go.

Thank you for being helpful on this path. Quit together, not apart.

[Diesel2112]

Hey all, its the fake tough guy keyboard cowboy here.

Just wanted to say I'm 513-0 vs the nic bitch and I ain't changing for ANYONE.

You think I'm fake.. fuck you
You think its ok to make fun of some if the shit I went through...fuck you
You think I'm here for any reason other than to quit and help others do the same...fuck you
You think Im just a coward behind a keyboard...fuck you

I'm real and I'm ME. You don't like it...

Fuck You.

Have a blessed day

Quit on...

[Diesel2112]

Im on day 9 of quit, but every morning I start off feeling like complete SHIT!  I get a good nights sleep but when I wake up I feel like I have smoked a pack of cigarettes or like somebody punched me in the chest, or almost like I have asthma or something.  I also have a pretty bad stomach ache.  I force myself to eat breakfast, drive my ass to work and feel like total shit til about noon.  Then the rest of the day I seem to feel pretty good, but that dull chest pain really never seems to go away.  It might lessen a little bit but it always seems to be there. (maybe a mental thing)

I guess what I am asking is if this is "normal"? have others experienced this? and just another thing I have to grind through? or maybe should I go to the doctor and see if something else is going on?  It's really pissing me off.

Yes. Go to the doctor and have it checked out.

I'd go get that one checked out. I had what felt like the flu that I fully believe to be nic related but never had dull pain. I'm not an expert but that sounds like one of the symptoms to heart related stuff.

Thanks guys. The bitch of all this is I was in the hospital for panic attacks which mask the symptoms of a heart troubles. They tested my heart every possible way and it was fine. Problem was when I got out of the hospital I kept thinking I was going to have more panic attacks and went back in. Again they tested my heart every which way til Sunday and it was fine. I think I'm still a bit nervous from the panic attack thing, plus quitting...it's just fucking my shit up. What a pain in the dick this all is. As if quitting wasn't enough I gotta deal with this panic attack bullshit. FML.

I have had panic attacks before.. well let me rephrase. I had a panic attack about 4 years ago. I was driving home from work late at night in the rain on a road in the middle of nowhere. Of course I had a chew in and all these stupid thoughts were running into my head about what would happen if i were to crash. I felt like I needed to take a deep breath and I couldn't quite get it. sooooo I pulled over and flipped the fuck out in my car. PUnching the windows and it felt like someone had a pillow over my face while sitting on my chest. I couldn't even leave my house for 3 days. Only reason I did was to go to doc. He said I was fine. I finally made it back to work and on the way home I was shaking and sweating and feeling like I was about to flip again. I stopped at e.r . got tested all good. they gave me ativan ( which I still have a script for) . It helps but I still always have that thought in the back of my head. What if it happens again... what if I can't get to a hospital... WHAT IF. Most days I am good and others I am not. I have been quit for 15 days and have noticed that I am having a lot more better days.

Not sure if this story helps any but it is my true story. I hope to continue to get better and you sir are in my thoughts and prayers as we both continue to fight the nic bitch and anxiety. Take it a day at a time brother! See you in the HOF

I had panic attacks quite often early in my quit. I had convinced myself I had every major disease there is and I would surely die at any moment. I like you had a tough time catching my breath, and all the other symptoms of anxiety. I went to the doctor so many times in my first 45 days or so that she finally told me to stop coming in. I had heart tests, lung tests, physicals, cancer screenings, you name it and I got tested for it.

I am now well into my quit and things are better. I still get the onset of a panic attack every now and then but I have learned to diffuse them. Some things I did to help early on: Work up a good sweat,walk, workout, whatever kills craves and anxiety. Meditate, it relaxes you and helps clear your mind. Instead of all the negative mind chatter replace it with positive thoughts.

Panic attacks can only happen when you create fear and doubt in your mind. Instead of wondering if or when the next attack may happen replace that thought with. I am done with panic attacks, my body is fine and I no longer fear them and I am free to enjoy life.

Keep fighting! It is worth it!!

STAY QUIT
Greg

Thanks guys. On day 10, what a motherfucker this is. Hope it gets better soon. I miss "me".

Just a little BUMP, to remind you of who you were on day 9 and 10.

Never again for any reason!!

Thanks for bumping this up IG2H, I thought I'd read Diesel's intro before, but maybe not, still glad to read it now for some more perspective on anxiety  panic.

39 pages of a crying little baby. It wasn't always easy but it has always been worth it.

[Mike from AB]

Im on day 9 of quit, but every morning I start off feeling like complete SHIT!  I get a good nights sleep but when I wake up I feel like I have smoked a pack of cigarettes or like somebody punched me in the chest, or almost like I have asthma or something.  I also have a pretty bad stomach ache.  I force myself to eat breakfast, drive my ass to work and feel like total shit til about noon.  Then the rest of the day I seem to feel pretty good, but that dull chest pain really never seems to go away.  It might lessen a little bit but it always seems to be there. (maybe a mental thing)

I guess what I am asking is if this is "normal"? have others experienced this? and just another thing I have to grind through? or maybe should I go to the doctor and see if something else is going on?  It's really pissing me off.

Yes. Go to the doctor and have it checked out.

I'd go get that one checked out. I had what felt like the flu that I fully believe to be nic related but never had dull pain. I'm not an expert but that sounds like one of the symptoms to heart related stuff.

Thanks guys. The bitch of all this is I was in the hospital for panic attacks which mask the symptoms of a heart troubles. They tested my heart every possible way and it was fine. Problem was when I got out of the hospital I kept thinking I was going to have more panic attacks and went back in. Again they tested my heart every which way til Sunday and it was fine. I think I'm still a bit nervous from the panic attack thing, plus quitting...it's just fucking my shit up. What a pain in the dick this all is. As if quitting wasn't enough I gotta deal with this panic attack bullshit. FML.

I have had panic attacks before.. well let me rephrase. I had a panic attack about 4 years ago. I was driving home from work late at night in the rain on a road in the middle of nowhere. Of course I had a chew in and all these stupid thoughts were running into my head about what would happen if i were to crash. I felt like I needed to take a deep breath and I couldn't quite get it. sooooo I pulled over and flipped the fuck out in my car. PUnching the windows and it felt like someone had a pillow over my face while sitting on my chest. I couldn't even leave my house for 3 days. Only reason I did was to go to doc. He said I was fine. I finally made it back to work and on the way home I was shaking and sweating and feeling like I was about to flip again. I stopped at e.r . got tested all good. they gave me ativan ( which I still have a script for) . It helps but I still always have that thought in the back of my head. What if it happens again... what if I can't get to a hospital... WHAT IF. Most days I am good and others I am not. I have been quit for 15 days and have noticed that I am having a lot more better days.

Not sure if this story helps any but it is my true story. I hope to continue to get better and you sir are in my thoughts and prayers as we both continue to fight the nic bitch and anxiety. Take it a day at a time brother! See you in the HOF

I had panic attacks quite often early in my quit. I had convinced myself I had every major disease there is and I would surely die at any moment. I like you had a tough time catching my breath, and all the other symptoms of anxiety. I went to the doctor so many times in my first 45 days or so that she finally told me to stop coming in. I had heart tests, lung tests, physicals, cancer screenings, you name it and I got tested for it.

I am now well into my quit and things are better. I still get the onset of a panic attack every now and then but I have learned to diffuse them. Some things I did to help early on: Work up a good sweat,walk, workout, whatever kills craves and anxiety. Meditate, it relaxes you and helps clear your mind. Instead of all the negative mind chatter replace it with positive thoughts.

Panic attacks can only happen when you create fear and doubt in your mind. Instead of wondering if or when the next attack may happen replace that thought with. I am done with panic attacks, my body is fine and I no longer fear them and I am free to enjoy life.

Keep fighting! It is worth it!!

STAY QUIT
Greg

Thanks guys. On day 10, what a motherfucker this is. Hope it gets better soon. I miss "me".

Just a little BUMP, to remind you of who you were on day 9 and 10.

Never again for any reason!!

Thanks for bumping this up IG2H, I thought I'd read Diesel's intro before, but maybe not, still glad to read it now for some more perspective on anxiety  panic.

[Dougie]

GOOD STUFF IN HERE-- JUST BUMPING SOMETHING DOWN...